Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Pangea ❯ Jurassic Pork ( Chapter 2 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

A Tale of Two Wallets
 
(An Altered Destiny)
 
Pangea
 
(The Land That Time Forgot)
 
Written by Jim Robert Bader
 
Proofread by Shiva Barnwell
 
 
Nabiki's Journal Continues:
 
As I look back on the events of the past frantic week of my as-yet-too-brief life I am left to marvel that I survived long enough to be sitting here recounting my adventures. Getting kidnapped by Prince Kirin (and nearly made into his blushing bride against my consent) turned out to be merely the start of the weirdness that I and my airen were forced to live through, but things really hit the rails once we arrived in beautiful, sunny Pangea, a land so fantastic and improbable that even now I have trouble believing that any of it actually happened. Looking back it seems more like some B-grade Toho Productions monster movie more than a real place where I nearly met my demise on a minute-to-minute basis, and I'd be heavily tempted to chalk it all up to a really bad mass hallucination were it not for that damned baby pterodactyl that Kasumi's gone and adopted, the annoying beak-brain currently staring me down from his cage like I was an evening snack that he intends to munch down upon.
 
I'd tell him that he could get in line behind the other guys who tried to turn me into their dinner, but that would be getting a bit ahead of myself here, and since I feel the urge to record these things before going to bed with Shampoo and Ranma, I might as well pick things up where I left off this morning, namely my first experiences shortly after waking up that fine morning and discovering that the Nekonron dirigible was heading for a mountainside, with a very rude scrape to the sides that reminds me overmuch of what happened to that British ship whose name is synonymous with such very rude encounters.
 
Granted I was half-asleep when it first happened, but once it happened I was on a non-stop adrenal rush for the rest of the morning.
 
Finding yourself in sudden free-fall is a stronger way of waking yourself up than a pot full of strong tea, to say nothing of the difficulties that might be posed by a sudden stop at the bottom. As such you really get to expand your mind and clarify your focus when the prospect of a sheer drop against steep cliff-walls looks as painful as it is likely to be should you allow it to happen. For any normal teenaged girl in my position this would definitely be such a problem…
 
However—as my luck would have it—I have something of an ace up my proverbial sleeve, even as Ranma and Shampoo have their martial arts training that somehow allows them to fall from an impossible height without suffering great injury (or even death). My training under Lotion in being a Lore Master came to the fore here, and without half thinking about it my concentration became acutely focused, and I sensed the force-lines in the air surrounding us, and reflexively reached out to them to touch those lines and tap into the flow of their manna.
 
I can't really describe for you what it feels like, your vision suddenly going from normal to some kind of prismatic effect where you see everything delineated in patterns of force, both strong and weak currents. Solid objects look a bit fuzzy around the edges, and there are these electrical lines surrounding everything like strings of curling energy that you can reach out and touch with your fingers. I only half understood what I was doing at the time, but it was like I knew it all along, what I had to do and what the consequences would be if I didn't loop those energy lines in just the right way before the three of us hit bottom. I had only seconds to weave things together, but like some kind of a mental spider, I cast my net out and surrounded us in a curtain of force that caught our weight and slowed our downward momentum.
 
I'm sure it must have come as quite a surprise for Shampoo and Ranma when our fall began to slow down to a crawl and we started to drift over the jungle turf as though we were suspended on invisible parachutes, to say nothing of how odd it felt to drift that way with our legs dangling out over the expansive jungle. Had anyone been looking up from the ground level I'm sure they'd have gotten a nice show since I was only wearing that bathrobe that I'd grabbed up in a hurry. Shampoo had on her typical pantsuit, and Ranma his usual pants and shirt Chinese outfit, but they had been the sensible ones, not like me, who had this vague notion that we were only getting up for a moment and would shortly be returning to bed for more of our morning hijinx.
 
But this was a seriously disturbing way to spend our morning, and while my efforts appeared to save us all from a bad tumble, I became belatedly aware that we were drifting off in one direction while our ride was headed in another. The dirigible had been stricken a mortal blow to the side and was headed for the ground at a sobering incline. I had no idea then and there if it would survive the crash or be wrecked when it hit bottom, and because it was soon lost among the canopy of clouds that surrounded some of the lower peaks I had no way of telling where it would wind up on the island below us, let alone in what condition.
 
Unfortunately my focus was on keeping us alive, and so I was not aware of what became of the other members of our oddly mismatched party. I had a vague sense that Kasumi was all right, and that she was with Kodachi (which is not necessarily the same thing in my opinion!), but Akane seemed to be facing some sort of difficulties, and the rest of our merry band were likewise faced with challenges of her own. The most amazing thing is that I did not perceive that anyone in our group (aside from Akane) was in seriously life-threatening danger.
 
That was a good thing since it meant that I could reserve the bulk of my attention to getting us save back on the ground without anyone among us being given a bad shake up. Ranma and Shampoo—bless them both—were wise enough to not distract me with questions until long after the tree tops rose up to surround us and we drifted down to the floor of a heavily wooded jungle. When at last we did set foot on the mossy soil of that strange island and I could relax my field of support altogether, a too-brief silence hovered among us as we took stock of what had happened, then Ranma—articulate as always—summarized our feeling in his typically understated manner.
 
“Whoah,” he said, to which Shampoo added an equally voluble, “Aiyaa…”
 
“Everybody okay?” I asked as I turned to my fiancées, “Anybody get a good look at where we landed?”
 
“Ah,” Ranma rubbed the back of his head and glanced around then said, “Not really. Can't even tell which way the sun is shining. Hate to say it, Nab-chan, but at the moment I feel as clueless as Ryoga.”
 
I was so not going there, but I did smile a bit as I turned to Shampoo, who normally is a pretty reliable tracker, and said, “Think we can find the others if they landed anywhere around here?”
 
“Is possible, Airen,” Shampoo replied, taking my question more in stride as she frowned and glanced about at our surroundings, “Maybe we find high place where we see more of area, get idea how land is formed, then explore in direction most likely to have sky boat. Maybe even find others along way and get group back together.”
 
I nodded to that assessment, then noticed the rather odd way that Ranma was looking at me and said, “What?”
 
“Um…well,” my intended husband seemed to be struggling for the right way of phrasing the question in his mind (and considering how blunt he normally is, I have to give him credit for making the effort), “Couldn't you just, like, pick a direction and let your instincts tell you which way? I mean…that Lore Master thing…it's supposed to help you know stuff, right?”
 
I had to blink at this, then I felt the rather large temptation to bang my head against one of the nearby trees since it was such a simple and obvious solution to our problem that I marvel that I didn't think of it myself at the moment.
 
“I…guess I could try that,” I said rather lamely, doing my best to save face while casting my gaze around and opening my senses to picking up a clue on where to get started. Not too surprisingly, I did feel an immediate tug in one direction that I somehow knew was the correct one, but even so it was more of a generalized sense that left was better than right and that the sky ship was off that way directly as the crow flies.
 
At the same time as I felt this, I immediately felt a looming sense of dread that warned me away from the direct route, as though that path would be leading us into serious danger. Danger was all around us, of course, and I felt as though I were drowning in a sudden surge of alarm that informed me that we were surrounded on all sides by things that wanted to eat us, but the way that lead directly towards the dirigible was BAD, or—put another way—MORE bad than any other.
 
“Ah,” I pointed vaguely, “I think that's where we have to go, but the trail we need to follow actually leads…that way,” I pointed off at an angle, “This is a pretty big island, and…I sense a lot of animals all around us…big animals, and nasty ones too, with lots of sharp, pointed teeth, which I very much think we ought to avoid if at all possible, you get me?”
 
“I think so,” Ranma said, “Um…what kind of animals?”
 
“Big ones,” I said with a shudder, feeling a dread as though one was breathing down my neck all of a sudden.
 
To tell the truth, I was so disturbed by my sense of looming danger that I failed, at the moment, to see the look of alarm that came over the lovely face of my wife as Shampoo nervously said, “A-Airen…”
 
Ranma was quicker to follow her line of gaze than me and managed to say, “Uh-oh,” before I had a chance to focus upon the source of their disquiet. When I did turn fully around in time to see the thing that was stalking up towards us I was already on the edge of full panic mode, but when I actually saw it I felt as though my blood and brains had turned instantly to Jell-O.
 
It was about ten meters tall…that much I knew ever before I looked upon it, and it was huge, massive, and—above all else—HUNGRY. It was covered in armored scales and had a head that looked fairly large in proportion to the rest of its body. The stubby little arms in front seemed hardly suitable limbs on such a powerful monster, but there was no question about the teeth being functional as it stared down at us with beady little eyes and seemed to be sizing us up as though to determine if we were suitable for its diet.
 
Funny thing about my first face-to-muzzle encounter with a dinosaur and the only thing I could think of at the moment was that he sure didn't look like those rubber suited monsters you see in the movies, for one thing, he smelled worse than latex, and for another…I had this really awful sense that he didn't come with a zipper…
 
 
The first thing Ryoga did when he found himself in the process of falling was to go limp and to let his natural momentum carry him forward. He would right himself with a tumble soon enough and then take stock of his situation, then try to absorb as much of his Chi into himself as he could to toughen up his body so that his landing would be merely uncomfortable, not fatal.
 
But the high-shrill scream he heard from close nearby changed his strategy abruptly, and at once he oriented himself upon the tumbling body of the blonde haired girl named Minako, who was falling quite near to him and seemed to be stretching out her hand as though attempting to catch him from a distance. He had the vague sense that she was preparing herself to do something towards that end, but all he could think about was that she was an ordinary girl and in no way as capable as him of surviving a fall from such a great height, so without further adieu he turned and angled his body to slow his fall by a fraction while angling himself directly underneath her.
 
Minako literally fell into his arms with a “WHOMPH!” of surprise, and then he wasted no time wrapping an arm around her slender waist while his other hand reached back and plucked his umbrella out from where it was normally carried. The fact that he had not been wearing it did not even occur to him, he just knew that it would be there, and so it was, and once he unfurled it the heavy thing it served as a passable parachute, slowing their descent down to a gentle glide among the treetops.
 
All the way down Ryoga was conscious of one thing, however: that the really cute busty blonde in his arms was pressing her lean body up against him and holding on tightly, or far more tightly than was absolutely necessary given that his own grip was sure and steady and there was absolutely no chance of him dropping her at this point.
 
Of course it also felt rather nice to be holding her like that, and the way her long blonde hair whipped around in the wind and threatened to tickle him on the nose, it was a fair struggle to maintain his concentration as they touched down together on the velvety earth in the midst of so much lush foliage and jungle life. Ryoga had been in jungles before, of course, and knew what to watch out for when in them, but rather than take stock of his surroundings he found himself instead looking down into the luminous blue eyes of the girl he had just rescued, and a moment later he felt certain that he was going to have a nose bleed, because the top of her dress was revealing an awful lot of cleavage!
 
“Ah,” Ryoga hastily averted his gaze and said, “You okay?”
 
“Yeah…sure thing, handsome,” Minako replied, doing nothing to decrease Ryoga's impending nasal hemorrhaging problems, “That was some trick with the umbrella, never thought you could actually use one like that…”
 
“Oh, it's nothing,” Ryoga said as he slung his umbrella over his back once again, and promptly forgot about it (even as Minako tried to peer around him to see where it had vanished), “Just glad you're safe. Um…I know this is going to seem like a really odd question and all, but…where are we?”
 
“Well,” Minako mused, studying his profile and silently remarking on this handsome young boy's problems about shyness (a trait she did not suffer from herself, of course), “Back on the ship that Mon-Mon character was telling us about this being some really weird island that goes by the name of Pangea. Supposedly it's in the Southern Hemisphere, which would put it close to Antarctica, but how could we possible get there from China in a day? I mean, it doesn't sound too probable, know what I'm saying?”
 
“Ah…yeah,” Ryoga said with a nervous chuckle as he rubbed the back of his head, “Well…we ought to go find the ship to see if everyone else made it all right. Um…you…wouldn't happen to know where it went, did you?”
 
“Sorry,” Minako replied, “Didn't pay much attention. I kind of had my focus on…um…other things. Say, do you think this is a really big island, or would it be hard to, y'know, explore it for a bit, just to get a lay of the land and all that, know what I'm saying?”
 
“Er…well…I suppose that could help,” Ryoga ruefully admitted, knowing from experience that wandering around lost would sooner or later bring him to where he was going if only by pure random chance.
 
“Swell—I mean…great,” Minako grinned impetuously, taking Ryoga by the hand while not intending to look that eager, “Then we might as well get started now, no telling how far we have to go and all that…”
 
“Ah…” Ryoga was all-too-aware of that hand gripping his and tugging him along, and once more he felt the urge to cover his nose to stave off a possible gusher. After all this girl was nice and pretty and seemed to actually like him, and she had to have a better sense of directions and where she wanted to go than he did, so exploring this island with her actually sounded kind of…romantic.
 
He had to swallow hard to keep from succumbing to his preternatural shyness. A really cute girl was drawing him off to parts unknown and neither one of them had any sense of where the others had gotten off to, or even if they were still alive (pessimist though he was, Ryoga refused to give up hope that the others would survive like he had, if only because Ranma was too tough and clueless to let a little drop like that put him out of action).
 
Minako smiled to herself, relishing the sense of raw, incredible power that seemed to flow through this young boy as she drew him along for a private assignation. There was something both manly and virile about this fellow, and she was feeling more and more attracted to him by the moment, even if they were still almost virtual strangers. He was polite to the point of shyness, courageous and a good fighter, a truly heroic and noble type of Prince Charming that any girl might count herself lucky to get marooned with, and so she was feeling rather eager to get to know more and more about him, especially away from the hungry competition (Usagi and the others, though Minako privately hoped that her beloved friends were all right and had made their Senshi transformations in mid-drop).
 
About the only thing that could sour her mood at the moment was the stray thought about what Makoto might be up to, and what had happened to her and her so-called “boyfriend.” It still smarted her ego to know that she had lost out on her chance to consummate her fun during the night with her long-time partner in Senshi-ual business, and as Minako thought on that she scowled a bit in irritation. Learning the truth about that Ukyo Kuonji floozy certainly did shake up her perceptions about her sometime rival, the okonomiyaki chef. The idea that she was a cute guy who magically transformed into a really cute girl was as disturbing as that time when she had almost dated one of the Starlights.
 
[Imagine the nerve of that bishonen half-man, stealing MY Mako-chan away from me, the nerve of some people! And that ditzy Makoto…letting herself be seduced by a sex-changing pervert like that? I mean, if she wanted a real woman, then she could have had me…]
 
The sudden shift in her mood did not go completely unnoticed by her companion, but Ryoga simply took it to mean that she was eager to find her missing friends and see if they were all right. It hardly occurred to him at all that she might be fuming over someone else who had stolen her affections. All he knew was that it did feel nice to be in her company for some reason, and he had ever intention of seeing to it that no harm befell her. He did kind of wonder about which direction they were heading in, though, even as he paused to wonder if anyone else had fallen overboard like them, and—if so—would they be encountering any of them in the very near future…?
 
 
The first thing Ukyo knew as he fell over the railing was that he had to grab a handhold quick or else attempt to find out if he was as good at surviving long falls as his buddy Ranchan. The second thought that followed close on the heels of the first was, “WHERE IS MAKOTO?” They had been standing close beside one another, but when the ship lurched to the side they both had been catapulted into the air together.
 
It took a bit of twisting and acrobatic nimbleness for Ukyo to orient himself around to where he could see his iinazuke as she, too, was headed groundward. Unlike him, however, she did not appear to be in any state of near-panic and was instead attempting to orient herself into an upright position, at which point she outstretched a hand and called out in a loud voice, “JUPITER STAR POWER!” which triggered her Senshi transformation.
 
Ukyo got very round-eyed as he watched Makoto go from the light silk robe that she had been wearing to total nudity with her magnificent long body given special detail by the weird illumination that surrounded her for the next several seconds, but then new clothing began to form around her, and he recognized her costume as her Sailor Jupiter guise, which meant that she was now magically fortified with the power of a Senshi.
 
Lucky for her that she had such a handy failsafe for emergencies like this. Unfortunately for Ukyo, she lacked a henshin pin and so had to get by with her normal level of power.
 
But then Makoto surprised him again by twisting her body around and with a display of agility even greater than what Ukyo herself could accomplish, the taller girl managed to close the distance between them and wrap her arms around Ukyo, spreading her legs wide and bracing herself for impact.
 
They landed with an awful thud, but Makoto easily absorbed the shock with her long legs coiled beneath her. She righted up again with Ukyo feeling only mildly dazed at the sudden shift of momentum, finding himself being cradled in his lover's arms as though she were the heroine and he was reduced to the role of mere side-kick.
 
“Are you all right, Senpai?” she asked, her concern evident upon her lovely expression in spite of the weird glamour that seemed to attend her Senshi incarnation.
 
“Uh…yeah, more or less,” Ukyo responded, “Just…give me a moment to get my stomach back in order, Sugar.”
 
To Ukyo's chagrin Makoto seemed to be in no great hurry to release him, but then she seemed puzzled more than worried as she saw that he had survived the rude landing, so she asked in a curious tone, “Senpai…did you get splashed on the way down? I thought you were in your girl form a second ago.”
 
“Huh?” Ukyo glanced down to determine that he was—indeed—quite male at the moment, then he blinked his eyes and said, “That's funny…didn't even notice when I changed. I was intending to stay a girl for a few more hours, but…I guess the fates are feeling playful, Sugar.”
 
“Oh well,” Makoto smiled again and reluctantly set Ukyo down on his feet, “No harm done, and like I said before, I like you either way. So…what the heck happened up there? Did we crash or…?”
 
“Wish I knew, Sugar,” Ukyo sighed, glancing up at the sky in search of the missing sky ship, “One minute our ride's there, the next it vanishes like smoke…speaking of which, there sure are an awful lot of clouds around those peaks. You think maybe it's gonna rain or something?”
 
“I hope so,” Makoto fanned herself for emphasis, “It feels awfully hot around here. Good thing my costume's well ventilated.”
 
“Uh…yeah,” Ukyo gave a slow study up and down of her companion, taking notice of what there was to the Senshi outfit—which meant largely what of it was not there drew your attention to the parts that were showing, “Guess that helps a bit. Um…so…any idea which way we should head off if we're gonna find the others?”
 
Makoto smiled at him (and caused Ukyo to feel an acute desire to renew their bedroom antics of the previous evening), “Your guess is as good as mine, Senpai, but as long as I'm with you I don't feel so alone. Not that getting lost on a deserted island in the middle of no where is necessarily such a bad thing, but…I would like to know if Usagi and the others made it, just like us.”
 
“Uh…yeah, and Ranchan,” Ukyo hastily added, trying to coach himself on the idea that they had important things to do and that now was DEFINITELY NOT the time to be screwing around in the bushes with his girlfriend, “Well…might as well get started…”
 
“I'm with you, Senpai,” Makoto affirmed as she fell into step alongside the bishonen sex-cursed chef, absently taking his hand as though she, too, was feeling tempted to do other things besides wander around lost in the bushes, and with that heady scent of sex in the air the two of them headed off, little aware that there were beady eyes following them and that their “scenic tour” of the island was about to become anything but tranquil…
 
 
Akane felt the crushing grasp of talons squeezing the life out of her as she was carried aloft by the thing that had grabbed her. The air was rushing past her face with the heavy sound of leathery wings beating against the wind currents, slowly gaining altitude as the creature carried her aloft towards its intended destination.
 
Struggling as she did to try and loosen the thing's powerful grip upon her, Akane felt a moment of real panic creeping over her, for she lacked the leverage that she would have needed to free herself, and without that her martial arts skills would avail her for nothing. Worse still, this creature was impossibly huge and quite evidently hostile, no doubt mistaking her for some innocent bird or other winged creature that normally made up its daily diet. This did not bode well for her considering what a wicked beak it had, and what those jaws could likely do to her once it had her safely back at whatever roost it used for a purchase.
 
As she racked her brains trying to think of a way to overcome this monster, however, she became belatedly aware that there was someone else present hanging on to one of its feet by a lacy ribbon. Glancing down, Akane made out the wavering form of the Lucky Gods Martial Artist known as Mon-Mon, who seemed to be clinging on for dear life. The Concubine Minstrel must have acted in desperation when the creature attacked them, and now she was as helpless as Akane in the face of a most unpleasant fall should she lose her grip on those ribbons for even a second.
 
Of course, the major difference was that the concubine had her hands free and Akane did not, which did give her an edge on the matter, a slim hope that she might be able to help Akane in her hour of desperate need…assuming that Mon-Mon was so inclined to help, which was assuming a lot considering what the Nekonron sort were, being the former kidnappers of Akane's sister, Nabiki.
 
“Are you all right?” Akane asked with as much force as she could manage considering the pressure that was being exerted upon her chest by the creature.
 
“Oh, just fine,” Mon-Mon called back, “Just waiting to see where it lands before I have a word with the creature over its dietary habits.”
 
That comforted Akane somewhat, even as she was still left to wonder how she was going to get herself out of this fix, and in what condition. Her wings were also pinned to her side and she could not unfold them, nor determine if they were damaged in any way. She had another surge of panic at the thought that she might be crippled if the force being exerted by the creature hurt her wings. Losing the gift of flight seemed as incomprehensible as the loss of an arm or a leg. She could not afford to be grounded at a time like this, when she would need to fly in order to find the Nekonron sky ship and her sisters. She only hoped that wherever Kasumi and Nabiki were at the moment it was in a safer place than she seemed to be headed…
 
Little did she know, however, but help was on its way from a heavenly venture.
 
Peorth had not been on board the sky ship when it collided with the volcanic mountain face, but even though she was hovering nearby lost in thought over the matter of bringing her daughter together with the chef, Kuonji, she had a sudden preternatural sense of immanent danger that hit her like a sledgehammer and caused her to whirl around in mid-flight. She at once homed in on the stricken airship but by the time she had arrived it was already heading off for an emergency crash landing. A quick scan of the vessel helped confirm her worst fears that her daughters were not on board, which prompted a hasty search and some impromptu spell casting in order to discover which of the three Tendo sisters was most in need of her assistance…
 
And—to no great surprise—she discovered it was Akane.
 
Finding the child whom she had helped bring into the world through her avatar's body being carried off like a field mouse by a barn owl was hardly the most reassuring sight any mother could have envisioned for her semi-divine mortal offspring, but the sheer size of the creature—a Pteradon, no less—was enough to give Peorth conniption fits. The huge winged reptile was forty meters in wingspan alone and reminded her overmuch of that not-so-charming fellow who used to pay Tokyo a visit a couple of decades back (Peorth still had nightmares about that encounter, one of her personal pet experiments that unfortunately got away from its laboratory, thus bringing a hasty end to her career in prehistoric gene splicing). So distraught was she at the sight of Akane in this creature's wicked clutches that she all but ignored the other humanoid form dangling from its leg by a few frilly ribbons.
 
Of course, being who and what she was, Peorth was set and determined to put a stop to these affairs, and so she called upon the power of her angel, “La Rose Manifique,” to balance the odd somewhat more in her daughter's favor.
 
Akane was too preoccupied to see the rapidly approaching form of the woman whom she believed to be the ghostly presence of her late mother as Peorth placed herself athwart the path of the oversized pterodactyl, but she was aware of something strange happening as a prickling along her spine signified the manifestation of The Angel of the Roses, but it was the Pteradon (and a very astonished Mon-Mon) who were in a position to witness the colossal form of a winged angelic being surrounded by a thorny vine of rose-sprouting tendrils spring up nearly in the face of the enormous creature. Akane felt as much as saw the rose vines lance out to ensnare the Pteradon in its immense netting, and all at once the creature was thrashing and beating at the vines, kicking out with its legs and generally trying to loose itself as the Rose Angel held it fast and prevented it from escaping.
 
Of course such frantic motions left Akane feeling very much like a rag doll being tossed and shaken around in the grip of the creature, but a moment later a pair of slender hands was prying those talons apart so that Akane could break free on her own, and like that she embraced the freedom of the air once again, spreading her wings wide with the joy of knowing that they had not, in fact, been actually damaged.
 
Her delight at discovering her freedom, however, was short lived, for out of the corner of one eye she caught sight of Mon-Mon being cast about like a fish on a line, and then the concubine lost her grip and went soaring into space, albeit without the benefit of a pair of wings to assist her. Without even a second of hesitation on her part Akane was rocketing to her side and once more caught the half-naked blonde girl in her arms, this time deliberately, and thus preventing a certain plummet to a very unpleasant demise. Mon-Mon gratefully put her arms around Akane's neck and held on as the Tendo girl tried to negotiate through the treacherous air currents, but no sooner had she started to get clear of where the creature yet struggled against the rose net then she heard Mon-Mon call out, “Look!”
 
Turning her head to glance back over her shoulder was not the easiest thing to do under the circumstances, but Akane managed it and saw what it was that had surprised the older woman whom she was carrying to safety. Her eyes went wide as she saw what looked like an enormous woman (who looked strangely like her mother) wrestling with the Pteradon as it fought frantically for release from its netting. So overwhelming was the vision of this epic struggle between “Angel and Dragon” that she failed to notice the smaller form of Peorth, who was trying mightily to conduct the actions of the angel. Akane also forgot to pay attention to where she was going, and so did not see the rising wall of stone before her until she and Mon-Mon noticed its shadow, at which point they looked up together and uttered a single well-chorused exclamation:
 
“Uh-oh…”
 
The next second following this was obscured by a very loud, “SPLAT!” followed shortly by a fireworks display of spinning pinwheels going off inside Akane's noggin…
 
 
Shampoo's Diary Continues:
 
I have never been all that interested in my great-grandmother's lessons on ancient history and culture, perhaps because I have had too much of it rammed into my skull over the years, and after a while you can get a little tired of such forced memorization. I mean, honestly, who cares what happened 44 generations back to Yam-Lin on the night of her honeymoon to Chuk-Li? Some of the trivia and gossip that the Elders go on about makes it sound like they were actually there instead of repeating the stories told around the campfires for as long as our people have existed. Even great-grandmother is not so ancient that she could have been around to personally witness many of the stories that she has related, but I think she was forcing me to remember much of these stories with the intent of having me one day repeat them to my designated heir in the future, assuming that I will find as much pleasure inflicting such an ordeal in my offspring.
 
The odd thing is that my husband actually enjoys learning about history, hearing old tales and stories about his distant ancestors. I can see it in his expression whenever he sits down to listen to the stories told of times and events long past, a little boy's enjoyment of the tales told by his elders. It reminds me of how he grew up alone with only his father for companionship, and stories must have comprised his sole means of entertainment, his imagination broadening with the legends of warriors and heroes locked in epic struggles against titanic forces. It is much the same as the sense of wonder I once felt growing up among my people, who walk hand-in-step with the stuff of legends.
 
Of course experience teaches us that legends are easier to listen through than live through, and while it might seem exciting to be off on an adventure it can also be a frantic thing to be charging through a wooded forest with your loved ones at your side, a hungry beast as big as a dragon charging hard upon your heels and intending to make the three of us into his morning breakfast. Alone I could have easily evaded such a lumbering brute of a creature, but not so my wife, who was stumbling along without the keen agility of our husband, Ranma, or myself. For her sake alone we traveled by foot as fast as we were able with the certainty that to stumble would prove fatal in the extreme, either squashed or goggled up, neither fate all that appealing.
 
Given that too much knowledge tends to induce a general indifference to gaining more of it, I have never taken much interest in studying the ancient times before the dawn of man when the creatures known as dinosaurs were the dominant life form on the planet. The particular specimen that was chasing us—I later was informed—was known by the curious name of Tyrannosaurus Rex, which my mother informs me means “Terrible Lizard.” Appropriate enough considering that it was trying to do terrible things to Ranma, Nabiki, and myself.
 
Of course, to prevent that we needed to escape from the beast's awful grasp, and as our ancestors would have it a helpful escape route presented itself to our eyes as we came upon a very tall tree with a conveniently high-placed broad branch within clear sight, and in testament to what a perfect match we are, Ranma and I spotted it in the exact same instant. A glance between us was all that was needed to convey our meaning, then each of us seized our wife by an arm and at once gathered ourselves up to make an appropriate leap that carried us to our purchase. I think Nabiki was caught a bit off guard by our maneuver, but the results were otherwise satisfying as we were treated to the sight of the monster lumbering past our newfound elevation. So lumbering and brutish was the beast that it could not adjust to our sudden tactic, and by the time it trundled by us it the beast had long since lost out trail and would have to reorient to discover us high above him.
 
A simple ploy to buy us time, of course, and to get Nabiki out of the line of the creature's attack since she was the most vulnerable of the three of us to the creature's appetites. Of course I knew the passive role of staying out of its reach was merely a delaying maneuver, and if the creature caught our scent it would be after us with renewed ferocity, and who knew if the tree whose branch we used would be up to withstanding its rampages.
 
Ranma, of course, understood our impending danger, but even so I did not expect him to take the dangerous risk that he next employed when the creature finally did return to menace us, and so brave was my husband that I love him the more for his self-sacrificing nature, even as I want sometimes to beat him hard on the top of his thick skull for making us worry about him in that manner as the next few moments were shortly to make plain of his heroic nature…
 
 
Nabiki's Journal Resumes:
 
I learned many important lessons that day, not the least of which being that a Tyrannosaurus Rex can do about fifty kilometers per hour at a dead run…and I should know because I was doing close to fifty-five myself…and don't even start with telling me that it's impossible for a human being to run that fast. You try outrunning one of those bloody suckers and you'll find out what I mean, especially when you have a couple of handy speed demons such as Ranma and Shampoo holding on to your shoulders.
 
Of course, it would have been nice of my dear baka loved ones if they had given me some warning before trying that running fifteen meter leap to that tall-wide branch that they both conveniently spotted at the same instant (and I don't even want to go there in imaging what would have happened to me if they had both misjudged their leap or picked different branches as their escape routes. (Can you say “instant wishbone?” I thought not…)
 
Anyway, there we were stuck on a branch of a tall tree panting like crazy while the monster lumbered down the trail underneath us, me feeling my chest about to burst from the way my heart is pounding like a hammer, and my lungs were on fire to boot, which overall means that I was still alive and as yet not gobbled.
 
Ranma, of course, recovered his wind a long time before I could, and Shampoo was not far behind him in getting her breathing back to normal. We took stock of our situation while I gradually felt my pulse beat return to something approaching normalcy and then I became aware that I was footsore and bleeding from a dozen different cuts that I must have suffered along the way while frantically running for my life. Of course the thin material of my robe was hardly suitable to provide much protection from the low-level foliage and branches that had scraped me, but as soon as Shampoo became aware of the numerous rents in my silk garments she at once commanded me to remain still while she peeled off my robe to give me a more critical examination.
 
Ranma—upon seeing this—reacted with the typical modesty that I at once found both annoying and endearing…I mean, as if he's never seen me naked before! Of course he jumped to the wrong conclusion as he turned his back on us and mumbled, “Hey, this ain't exactly the time for that you too…”
 
“Silly Ranma,” Shampoo chided while she examined me closely, “Is no for fun that Shampoo think Nabiki need exposing. Is strange place with many plants that Shampoo no can identify, which maybe mean some plants no good for Nabiki, and Shampoo have to see if she have allergic reaction.”
 
“Oh,” I hadn't considered that point myself, but now that Shampoo mentioned it, I was starting to itch in a few of those places where I'd been scraped, and since she was the medical expert in our merry little threesome, I was more than contented to remain still on that damned branch while she striped me down and gave me a very thorough examination. (Of course, knowing Shampoo, she might just be using it as an excuse to strip me…but since when has she ever needed an excuse to do that? Either way I trusted her implicitly, even while suspecting her of having ulterior motives, as was borne out a few moments later…)
 
It was odd thinking how I was balancing my weight on my bare feet with the bark of that tree pressing up against my shoulder blades and fanny, trying to think clinically of other things while Shampoo checked me out with sensitive fingers that were at once gentle and intrusive. After satisfying herself that I had gotten off light for my troubles, Shampoo next confirmed my “worst” suspicions by pronouncing that she knew the “cure” for my wounds, an old Amazon family remedy that required her to—as they say—“Kiss and Make Me Feel Better.” (Hey, it works! The moment she tried it I started feeling better already, even though I knew damned well that my purple-haired bride was taking advantage of the situation…)
 
Anyway, Shampoo proceeded to give me an oral examination while Ranma stood back on the far end of that branch watching us with rounded eyes and one heck of a bulge in his trousers. I was doing my part to play the role of docile patient while rolling my eyes and groaning softly at the way Shampoo was rolling her tongue over my wounds and licking the parts that were especially itching. She started up around my shoulders and worked her way down my chest to my hips to my belly button, even going to areas that were definitely NOT scratched, scraped or bleeding, and everywhere that magic tongue of her traveled I felt a tingling sensation as though her oral magic really was accelerating the process of my healing. She got down to my legs and started to go to work by exposing my ass and then tending to a bruise there, then glided down my right thigh to my calves and started to do something with my foot that took the pain away, and it was just as she was starting to tongue a trail down from my ankles to my toes that I started to feel a certain wetness flowing from my pelvic region. It felt so good that I didn't want her to stop ever, and who knows what this would have led to with Ranma only a meter-and-a-half away and watching us go at it with rounded eyes that betrayed none of his usual shyness. I can only guess what would have happened next with Shampoo waving her pert little ass in his direction (giving a hint that even the baka couldn't miss if he was blindfolded), but—as the fates would have it—that was the moment we had yet another of those dratted interruptions, once again coming from below us in the form of a bellowing roar that shook the leaves and nearly caused us to lose our purchase.
 
Mr. T-Rex had finally found us again, no doubt being led to the spot by all the profuse noises I know full well that I'd been making, and with a start the three of us stared down into the gaping maw of death as the creature snapped its jaws in our direction. We were about three meters up too high for it to reach even standing on its clawed tiptoes, but to our surprise the creature proved that it could leap the remaining distance, and I yelped as I snatched my dangling legs back just in time to miss losing a foot as the creature's snout brushed so close nearby that I could fell the hot breath from its nostrils as it just barely missed me.
 
This tactic on the creature's part let us know that we were not safe sitting up there waiting for it to bite us, but when it came back down on its legs the resulting “THUD” of multi-tons of raging mad iguana proved too much for Ranma's balance as he was shaken loose from the branch and went tumbling towards the ground below us.
 
“Airen!” Shampoo cried as I cried out Ranma's name as the two of us watched helplessly while our mutual husband-to-be dropped like a stone close to where the monster was rampaging. The creature was quick to detect the movement and was on Ranma like a shot, and if not for those legendary Saotome reflexes we'd both be widows, for the creature's snout came that close to clamping on his flesh if Ranma had not twisted impossibly out of the way with a gymnastic tumble that would have impressed the hell out of Kodachi.
 
He landed in a catlike roll and was on his feet in an instant, but now the T-Rex was on the trail and smelling blood, so it charged at him and sought to chomp him into bits while Ranma just as frantically moved out of the way to avoid it. What followed next was an impromptu cat-and-mouse game with the T-Rex making a score of attempts that were just narrowly blunted. It finally managed to press Ranma a little too hard and got him backed up to the base of our tree and had him effectively cornered.
 
But cornering Ranma and gobbling him are definitely not the same exact thing, and with all avenues of escape effectively cut off, Ranma naturally went on the offensive, unleashing his “Chestnut Fist” at point-blank range at the snarling muzzle of the creature. Objectively speaking, his individual punches might not amount to much against such a brutish monster, but when hit a hundred times in a second by this “insignificant” morsel, even the toughest gargantuan beast is going to feel it, and T-Rex proved to be no great exception.
 
With a sound more akin to a yelp than a snarl the T-Rex backed away from Ranma and tried to use those stubby little arms in front to rub its snout down, clearly pained by the staccato impact of Ranma's punches. I remember reading somewhere that a shark's snout is its vulnerable point that that a good blow to the nose will usually discourage even such a ravenous creature, so Shampoo and I gave a rousing cheer of ecstatic approval, thinking that this would deter the ravenous brute from continuing its pursuit of our Ranma. That proved to be a mistake, however, as it reminded the T-Rex that it had two other tempting morsels perched right above within easy munching distance. It looked up at us and I could swear that I saw the hungry eyes of the reptile focus upon me as though I was suddenly a blue plate special that had just gone on the menu (Shampoo being the necessary appetizer it would have to munch down on before working its way to yours truly).
 
Fortunately Ranma saw this sudden shift in focus and drew the necessary and correct conclusion. That fired him up like nothing else I could imagine, and without a seconds hesitation he started to draw upon his Ki as he shaped his hands in front and prepared to unleash his dreaded Mako Takabishi.
 
I'd only seen him perform this once before, but let me tell you, it's really something else to behold! One minute my iinazuke is standing there drawing on his own internal life force with the accumulated fury of his self-confidence serving as a focus. His desire to protect us made him pull out all the stops as he drove this force through his hands into a ball of concentrated energy then unleashed it like a cannon shot going straight at the belly of the monster and hitting it hard with hurricane force projected outward in a titanic explosion.
 
To say the T-Rex was caught off guard by that would be a heck of an understatement, it was literally picked up and thrown away by the force of Ranma's ego and I watched in amazement as the huge beast went sailing off into some distant part of the jungle. The wave itself blew past our point with a backwash that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up to full attention, and then it surged past us and was absorbed back into our surroundings, leaving an unnatural quiet in its wake while Ranma continued to stand underneath us with his arms projecting outward.
 
Of course, as impressive as this new technique of his might be, it still takes a lot out of a guy, and Ranma was not long in sagging to his knees, exhaustion overwhelming him as if he had put a little too much into that attack and left little behind to sustain him.
 
“Ranma!” Shampoo called out, sparing me a glance to no doubt assure me of her intentions before she dropped lightly off our branch and landed right beside him. She knelt down over our slumping boyfriend and said in a tentative voice, “Airen?”
 
“S'awright,” I heard Ranma weakly mumble as if he were struggling to remain conscious, “I got `im…s'all that counts…”
 
“Silly Ranma,” Shampoo softly chided, “You need learn better control of great-grandmother's techniques, no good using everything at once, better to save some for later.”
 
“Now ya tell me…” was what I think Ranma meant to say next, but he passed out before the words could fully escape him, leaving Shampoo to cradle our man in her arms with a tender endearment that I felt even at a distance. I could also tell that he was all right, but he would need a few minutes to recover his resources.
 
“Airen,” Shampoo called up to me, “You be all right? Shampoo need take Ranma to get water. Think we near stream close by, will be back in few moments.”
 
“Hey, I understand,” I called down to her, “You do what you have to. I'll stay here and…uh…meditate, or something…”
 
I saw her flash a smile at me that was as much an open invitation to rape as anything I'd ever seen on the lips of my purple haired sweetheart. Then Shampoo gathered Ranma up into her arms and carried him off down the trail and out of my sight, leaving me feeling left out and alone and altogether aware of my vulnerable position up on that tree branch.
 
I gathered what remained of my silk robe about myself and huddled on that branch, trying not to look down and feel miserable about my current predicament. Technically speaking I knew that was I not safe where I was, that the T-Rex could hardly be the only monster about on this island, and that there were probably a whole host of other dangers just lurking nearby while sizing me up like I saw something on the menu. I might as well have rung a dinner bell and told them to “Come and Get It” for all the good waiting there was going to do me, but I had no alternative plans in mind, and no place was technically safe so long as I was on that damned island.
 
In truth I was more than a little worried about Ranma and Shampoo as well, but I knew those two could handle themselves a lot better in a strange environment a lot better than I could. After all, I'm a city kid at heart, and wilderness situations are definitely NOT my forte, even without prehistoric monsters stomping about looking to complicate my mornings. Even though I'm getting used to traveling on training trips with iinazuke, I can't imagine doing it for longer than a couple of weeks at best. I much prefer having a roof over my head and a nice soft bed I can cozy up on to sleeping under the stars and risking the elements for my troubles.
 
As luck would have it (or maybe not so much luck as by the intention of the kami), it turned out that my relative isolation was short lived, for no sooner had I started to feel sorry for myself then a familiar voice said, “Sulking hardly befits you, Apprentice. What moves you to lament like this when you should be enjoying the experience of yet another romantic setting with your airen?”
 
By now I'd gotten pretty jaded about the way my sensei can pop up whenever she likes to turn even my darkest moments into training exercises, so I hardly said anything as corny as, “You?” or, “Where did you come from?” Instead what I said was, “What took you so long, Teach?”
 
“Forgive me,” Lotion replied as she stood facing me on the spot on the branch formerly occupied by Ranma, “I was enjoying the scenery and taking advantage of the rare opportunity to closely examine the wildlife. So much interesting flora and fauna to be discovered her, rather like some of the more remote places that still exist in my native China. I sensed that you were having a bit of trouble here and decided to leave off on that, however. So…what seems to be disturbing you, Apprentice, and why are you here and not bathing in the river with your airen?”
 
I was tempted to say, “Are you serious?” when I knew full well that the question was rhetorical. Somehow Lotion always seems to know my mind better than I do, so I just sighed and glanced off into the jungle before admitting the thing that was depressing me the most, “I don't want to be a burden.”
 
“Because they can handle strange settings such as this better than you?” Lotion asked, then made a dismissing motion with her staff, “Piffle! You are a Lore Master. There is no environment that is so strange or alien that you cannot adapt and overcome any obstacles, and even at your current level of training you should be more than adequately well armed to deal with such troubles as are afforded by this island.”
 
“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” I replied without meaning to sound cynical, “But somehow I don't think I could have managed that T-Rex half as good as Ranma.”
 
“You would have found a way,” Lotion insisted, “You may not be the combat genius he is, or even as adaptable in martial arts settings as your wife, but still you have abilities at your disposal that you are failing to take into account here. In truth the fault is mine that you not more fully developed your abilities. I have been taking it easy on you on account of your recent ordeal in Nekonron China…”
 
“Hey, I'm not griping about it,” I insisted, “And I'm doing the best I know how here…”
 
“Really?” my teacher asked with a skeptical gleam in her expression, “Then I think I had better not neglect your training any further. You obviously need more of a nudge from me to get you started in discovering your true potential. Fortunately this island makes for an excellent training ground, and one you will do well to profit by if you keep your wits about you and do not allow yourself to become too distracted by petty danger.”
 
“Petty?” I asked, putting as much weight as I could into my exclamation.
 
“Danger to the body is as negligible as danger to the mind of a Lore Master,” Lotion insisted, “You are gifted with the ability to know things by tapping into your own subconscious, by sensing the currents that flow around you so abundantly and shaping these forces to your will with the power of your imagination. You have not begun to truly comprehend what means are available to you even now with your inadequate level of training. You were able to instinctively save your life and that of your loved ones only a few minutes ago by drawing on lei lines and using them to brace your fall so that none of you were seriously injured…”
 
“Hey, that was instinct,” I said, “I don't really know how I did it or what I did…I just felt my way along there, teach. It's not like I could do it again with conscious effort…”
 
“Why don't we test that theory?” my mentor replied, turning to face the end of the branch we were sitting (or—in her case—standing) upon and favoring me with an encouraging smile, “Get up now and join me on the ground. It's really not that severe a fall, at least when compared to dropping out of the sky and landing on your own two feet.”
 
“Get up?” I looked at the old woman as though she were insane, for I had absolutely no intention of budging from the relative safety of my current perch, not even at her urging.
 
“Yes,” she said with just a hint of impatience, “You must learn to trust yourself and not show such immediate hesitation in the face of ordinary danger. You know perfectly well what you need to do, all you have to learn is to focus your energies and it becomes second nature.”
 
“Easy for you to say,” I retorted, “You've been doing this for a couple of centuries. I've only been practicing with you for a little under a year now.”
 
“A little under a year and you should be much farther along than you are now in your training,” she insisted, “Now come…you already know how to fall, just do it and stop making excuses.”
 
I knew well enough by now that I was not going to get any peace until I did as the old biddy instructed, so I reluctantly got up from the spot where I was sitting and carefully balanced myself on the balls of my feet, wobbling a bit as I recognized how high up we were and what a fall from this height might feel like…assuming I survived without breaking my neck, spine and legs on impact. I tried carefully to focus upon her and to ignore the looming danger of what she was proposing while giving her my best glare of defiance, as if to say, “You better know what you're doing here,” even as I said aloud, “Supposing I blow it and can't focus like you say? You gonna catch me or let me bust my skull on the landing?”
 
“Sooner or later you are going to have to learn to get by without relying on me or either of your loved ones,” Lotion assured me, “As every bird must sooner or later leave the nest, so too does this rule hold firm with troublesome students who refuse to trust their teachers.”
 
Without further warning on her part she suddenly extended that staff of hers and—ever so lightly—gave me a tap on my breastbone. All at once I felt myself begin to teeter off that branch, and with a surge of panic I windmilled my arms and went, “WHOOP!” before finding myself in immediate free-fall.
 
The human body, generally speaking, obeys the rules of physics that apply to all solid matter, so when I started to fall I became subject to the standard rule of falling at an accelerating rate of 9.87 meters per second squared. In layman's terms that means two seconds were all the time it would take for me to drop like a stone and hit ground with a kinetic force of roughly ten thousand kilograms, which—spread out over the length of my entire body—gives a kilograms-per-square-inch surface impact of roughly 30 kg/cm2, which would hurt a lot, let me tell you!
 
Only that wasn't what happened. The moment I went into a fit of panic my mind suddenly seemed to flip a switch internally and I started to see the ground the way I had in my previous free-fall. I don't really know how to classify it other than to say that the jungle setting changed abruptly into a wave of patterns and colors that I reached out and tapped into without seeming to know how I did it. I felt those lines converge around me and swell to form a netting that caught and supported my weight, and with my arms extended I seemed to glide down to ground level on a gentle current of warm updrafts, and then my feet touched ground again and I felt a tingling pass all through my body. Immediately the scene shifted back to normal, leaving me to stare around in wonder then glance back up to the branch as though to ask how I got down here.
 
“Now, you see?” Lotion asked from immediately beside me, “That wasn't so difficult. The only obstacle to the use of your powers is your ability to imagine them, and your willingness to employ your resources.”
 
“Ah…I guess,” I said somewhat reluctantly, glancing around at the forest as though expecting something to come lunging out at me at any moment.
 
“Walk with me, Apprentice,” Lotion said as she started forward in that typical way she has of assuming that I'll naturally follow her lead, “We have much to discuss, you and I, before we rejoin your loved ones, and there are many things I would impart with you…assuming that I can rely upon your undivided attention.”
 
I smiled as I followed her lead like a faithful puppy, “Whatever you say, Teach. But…um…what if that T-Rex has buddies who decide to put in an appearance?”
 
“We will manage well enough,” she assured me, “You must learn not to allow yourself to be rattled by such trivialities. A Lore Master is never surprised by her surroundings, nor does she face a threat that she cannot manage on her own. You must learn self-reliance in the face of adversity if you wish to become the master of your own fate and not fate's victim. Only if you allow it to happen will the monsters win and have themselves a nice dinner at your expense…”
 
“Not funny,” I scowled, wincing a bit as my bare foot encountered a particularly sharp stone, which forced me to mince a bit before adjusting to my discomfort.
 
“I am quite serious,” she assured me, “You have to get over this lamentable tendency you have of allowing circumstances to get the better of you. It's all well and fine to play the part of the helpless damsel in distress who is in need of a rescue, and I that know it gladdens the hearts of your loved ones that they feel important enough to be of service on those occasions, but you should find some less risky way of gaining their attention…”
 
“Hey!” I protested, “It's not like I asked to get kidnapped!”
 
“But what did you do to prevent it?” she quizzed me with a knowing expression, “You caught that portion of the Nekonron recipe scroll without once questioning its significance, and as such created the false impression with Prince Kirin that you were his fated bride rather than the true recipient of his affections, Lychee. Now you know what the consequences can be of playing the passive heroine in a romantic drama. Do you intend to make it a habit?”
 
“Of course not!” I insisted before amending, “Ah…I know don't know how I can…well…avoid it happening again…I mean, not that I plan on grabbing any more stray scrolls that fall into my lap.”
 
“Leaning from experience is certainly the mark of a wise person,” my mentor replied, “But the wiser woman learns before making a mistake and avoids doing so. That is among the gifts in your possession that you have yet to learn to exercise, and that is why we must further your training, less—that is—you enjoy being constantly rescued.”
 
I had to think on that one long and hard, let me tell you, all too aware of what a thrill it was for me to find Ranma dashing to my assistance while Shampoo braved the lions den at my side, risking everything on my behalf, a real testament to how much they both care about me. I enjoyed the moment of triumph when Ranma proved the better man and put that Kirin character in his place, but would I really give up on having it happen all over? I know for a fact that I like being reassured of my iinazuke's affections, and maybe—deep down—I'm just insecure enough that I need to be cuddled, just like Ranma needs an occasional pat to his ego.
 
Of course, at the time, I didn't realize that Lotion was meaning to prepare me for what was about to happen later on down the pike, but who knew I'd be playing the helpless damsel again so soon after the last time? It's things like that which make me realize how much I really do need to pay attention to Lotion and her teachings. I may enjoy having Shampoo and Ranma swoop down to my rescue and all that, but the risks they take on my behalf are enough to make me seriously question the wisdom of such a tactic. Besides which, I need to be the one who occasionally kicks a little ass on the sly, if only to make sure that people know better than to mess around with Tendo Nabiki.
 
Besides which, getting taken down like that—and in such an embarrassing manner—is hardly the kind of boost to my own ego that I'd want to repeat, especially considering how long it took to get rid of the smell of those damned lentils, and don't get me started about the way I flinch any time I see a stew pot, considering the spicy business that was about to befall yours truly…
 
 
Continued
 
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