Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Vegeta Goes Camping! ❯ Vegeta Goes Camping ( One-Shot )

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN DBZ.

A/N - I wrote this ages and ages ago and only found it on my computer a few weeks ago. I thought it was pretty funny and got a few laughs out of it. It's basically a diary of Vegeta's thoughts when he gets dragged on a camping trip with his family. It's funnier then it sounds ^_^

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11/11/2002 - 4:29:11 PM

Dear Diary,

Today we left Capsule Corporation to go on a something called a 'camping trip'. I am unhappy. Most unhappy. If I still had my tail it would no doubt be lashing about in fury.

While tramping along the 'bushwalking trail' I tripped on a tree root and split my lip. Luckily no one saw this. I had been glowering too much and they had walked on ahead.

I must, however, now invent a suitably manly story for how it really happened - I am thinking of something along the lines of "Dusk til' Dawn" meets "Dawn of the dead."

Also found the woman's stash of strawberry creams hidden in her sleeping bag. Ate them. Blamed Trunks.

The brat is now grounded for two weeks once this infernal trip is over.

Ha!

Oh Kami, I want to go home. I hate this stupid trip! Everything is bright and sunny and that idiot Kakarot and his family are due to meet up with us soon.

Great. It's started raining. I hate my life.


- Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans.

~*~

12/11/2002 - 12:05:38 AM

Dear Diary,

Today we reached out 'camping ground' as the woman put it and set up camp. Or rather they set up camp while I stood by and watched them make idiots out of themselves.

Neither the woman nor the brat can set up a 'tent.' Watching them was most amusing…at least until Kakarot showed up and put the tent up for them.

I am not happy. I do not want to spend my nights lying in a stupid little tent with those tiny flying blood sucking insects trying to devour me.

There was a plus however. When Kakarot, his wife and their spawn met up with us - that is still part of the bad stuff - Kakarot insisted on 'sparring' with me.

During out scuffle I managed to kill several small fluffy creatures. However I did get hit in the face by Kakarot as we trained.

God I hate him.

I have decided to start some sort of anti-Kakarot club on the internet once we return to civilisation - I have a feeling my anti-Kakarot club will be well received.

I will call it 'Some Sort Of Anti-Kakarot Club' or 'SSOAKC' for short.

Once I have followers I will reveal myself to them and convince them to follow my in my quest for a Kakarot-less world.

Then I will slay them and rule the universe.

Heh, suckers.

For dinner the woman cooked (burnt) some steak. I refused to eat it on basis of my number one rule; 'If Bulma cooked it, do not eat it.'

Tomorrow the woman says we will be going bushwalking again. I think she is trying to punish me for not eating her charred steak.

- Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans.

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13/11/2002 - 4:10:49 PM

Dear Diary,

Today I trained while the others went bushwalking. The woman was most vocal about me staying by myself but I ignored her. Something I do well these days.

I also contemplated beating the brat after he tore my good blue uniform during dinner, but I fear the woman's response if I do. She can be quite protective of the brat.

Ate some good chicken for dinner. Kakarot's mate cooked it.

I hate this camping trip. The next time the woman has one of her 'family bonding' idea's I will not listen.

Never again will I allow myself to be subjected to the torture of living in the wild with a bitchy wife and an annoying brat who tears perfectly good uniforms.

I do not care what it takes. I am ending this camping trip...as soon as the others fall asleep I will destroy the camp and blame it on the 'wild animals' the woman is always warning the brat about.

- Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans.

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14/11/2002 - 6:17:58 PM


Dear Diary,

The woman informed me that today was to be our last day of camping. Apparently during the night some sort of 'wild animal' had ransacked our camp.

Heh.

I can't believe that the woman fell for my crappy trick. All I had to do was wait for them to sleep then trash the camp and make pretend animal tracks.

It wasn't hard.

Okay, maybe it was a little difficult, but I was desperate to leave! You cannot comprehend how horrible this trip has been!

During the trek home I managed to shove Kakarot off the walking trail and knock him down into a deep gully. Kami, is that man an idiot.

He actually apologised for getting in my way. He didn't even know that I had deliberately pushed him!

On the way back it started raining again. I got drenched and my blue uniform, which was already torn from the brat, got all stretched. I had to put up with the woman and Kakarot making jokes about my baggy uniform.

God I hate them, I hate them all!

As soon as I'm finished in here I'm starting my anti-Kakarot club on the Internet - then they'll all be sorry!

- Vegeta, the prince of all Saiyans and Leader of SSOAKC.

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A/N - I might do a few more chapters - you know like Bulma's diary and Goku's diary. Let me know what you think and I may write a little bit more.