Gintama Fan Fiction ❯ salarymen go to heaven ❯ part 8 ( Chapter 8 )

I still have not been able to acquire the rights to Gintama, but my people are working on it. Balkan mafia, go!

 

 

* * Part Eight: In Which the End of the World is Set into Motion and the Chocolate Chip Cookies are Baked and Pocketed with Respect * *

 

 

Fifteen minutes later, Gintoki (with a dislocated nose which was slowly dripping blood on his clothes) was standing in front of the Shinsengumi headquarters doing his best not to look at Kagura who in turn ignored him heartily.

 

When staring at the wooden gate with the word CANDOUR carved into one side, reminiscent of the Shinsengumi banner, became ridiculous, Gintoki cleared his throat. “Well, looks like he dumped you, Kagura. Let's just go home before they arrest us for suspicious behaviour. I am freezing my ass off.”

 

“I didn't ask you to come!” retorted Kagura heatedly. “You could've just told me where the stupid place was!”

 

Gintoki sighed. “Well, it wasn't exactly my idea to come here, now was it? I couldn't care less if you two go on a homicidal spree of biting people's heads off or spend many splendid hours trying to kill each other and call it sex, just don't drag me into all of this.”

 

“You are so unsupportive, right! How am I supposed to grow into an independent young woman if you keep blocking my expansionalitive desires.”

”…you are forbidden from watching any TV for the rest of the month,” grunted Gintoki. “And expansionalitive is not a word. What was that supposed to mean, anyways?”

 

“It means every girl holds in herself the perfectly normal need to experiment and expensionalise her literary horizons in a practical manner!” shouted Kagura back.

 

“Expansionalise, I mean, EXPAND what literary horizons? What have you been reading lately? Lady Chatterley's lover? Now, you see the bastard is not coming, let's just go home.”

 

As he was saying it, though, a dark silhouette started crossing the inner courtyard, waving down the guards who looked on at the two civilians suspiciously arguing in front of the gate. Okita Sougo stepped into the streetlights and glanced across the faces of two very pissed off people.

 

“Master Freelancer, I didn't know you were coming along,” he said raising his eyebrows.

 

“I am not,” muttered Gintoki. “She just didn't know where this place was.”

 

“You could have said so, China,” he said in his flat voice, looking at Kagura who was pouting at the opposite wall, burning a hole in the CANDOUR sign. Okita dragged his gaze, almost equally accomplished in looking dead to the world as Gintoki's own, back to the Freelancer himself. “Well, this is certainly an odd situation. Are you going to tell me to bring her back at a decent hour?”

 

“…I'll just tell you, if you break it, you've bought it,” grumbled Gintoki joining Kagura in the attempt to burn through the CANDOUR.

 

Okita laughed. “Point taken, master Freelancer. China? You coming?”

 

“What?” blurted Kagura and Gintoki together.

 

Okita blinked at them. “What?”

 

“I thought you were taking me out! You said you were taking me out to dinner, right, it was the punishment, right!” screamed Kagura at him while Gintoki savoured the bitter taste of being right about everything, always being right about everything.

 

“No, China, the deal was to treat you to dinner on Sunday evening, I keep to my word,” said Okita, enjoying every single syllable that fell from his mouth.

 

“What is going on here?” came the booming voice and Gintoki twitched. “Oh, master Freelancer,” greeted Kondo, his heels soon dogged by Hijikata who came to see what the noise was about in his own right. Kondo wore his trademark smile the size and reflective quality of the half moon, while Hijikata just oozed the blackness usually surrounding the moon, as was his habit. His icy eyes fell on Gintoki and the blackness swallowed some wayward stars and planets in a sudden attack of aggression. “What are you doing here?” said Kondo and Hijikata in two completely different tones.

 

Gintoki cringed under one innocently delighted and one murderously intent gaze. “I was just leaving, really, dropped off your bundle of misfortune, and now I'm going home to watch the end of the world with Shinpachi and pockets full of chocolates.”

 

A long silence struck as the two newcomers took in the scene in light of Gintoki's cryptic prophecy. Interestingly enough, they seemed every bit as horror struck as they should be, obviously catching on which was something that Gintoki had foolishly put beyond them.

 

In the sticky shush, Okita turned around and started walking into the headquarters garden. “You coming, China?” he called after Kagura and, still pouting but grateful she can escape the flickering stares of the Shinsengumi's Commander and Vice-commander, she followed. Gintoki noticed, somewhat distractedly, that they both walked the same way.

 

 

* *

 

 

Lady Chatterley's lover is a rather scandalous book by D. H. Lawrence, banned at the time for the socially unacceptable pairing and explicit sexual scenes.

CANDOUR refers to the Shinsengumi banner which says 誠 (read “makoto”) meaning truthfulness, sincerity, faithfulness or, well, candour.