InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan: A Moment Lost Forever ❯ Chapter 9 ( Chapter 10 )

Chapter 9: Wagamama

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Totosai stared down the mountainside with a worried frown. Rin was late in returning AGAIN. He paced the entire length of the ledge in nervous anticipation and glanced up at the grey sky. Dark, heavy clouds were gathering on the horizon --- a clear sign of an impending snow-storm. If the young woman didn't return within the hour, she would most likely be cut-off, possibly for days!

Totosai inhaled deeply, trying to catch any trace of her scent on the raging wind. Ever since that surprise encounter with her former master last week, the smith had noticed a marked change in the girl's behavior. Though a bitter sadness still remained in her eyes, most of her outward depression had faded to give rise to a fierce sort of recklessness. It was almost as if something in her heart had burned away and she had no more fear.

Though the girl had never been one to sit idle for more than a few minutes at a time, she had --- up until now, at least --- always been content to remain close to the cave and under his watchful eye.

But that was all before Sesshoumaru's unexpected visit.

Now Rin was prone to wander, disappearing down into the valley for long stretches of time with hardly a word as to when she'd return. Lately, she had even begun to cajole Momo for rides to cover more ground while exploring the steep mountain trails. Totosai sighed. Obviously, she must have taken him with her again this evening --- the fat bull was nowhere to be found and wouldn't answer to any of his repeated calls.

The old demon kicked at the snow in frustration. With his one means of transportation also currently missing, there was NO way for him to initiate a proper search or attempt a rescue. He could only hope his wayward girl was safe and knew exactly what she was doing --- wherever the hell she was.

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Rin hovered low on Momo's broad back, shielding her eyes from the stinging hail and wind. There was NO way she could make it home tonight. The craggy pass was blocked by thick storm clouds and the fog was so dense she could hardly see her own hand in front of her face. Though fairly confident that her strange mount could scent his way back to the forge, she simply wouldn't risk the chance of getting lost in a blizzard. With small taps of her heels, she guided the bull back down from the frigid air.

They silently glided into the sheltered, clear valley below. After a few quick moments of circling, Rin finally spotted a suitable place to make camp next to the large lake.

Totosai would doubtlessly fret over her absence. The young woman felt horrible to cause the caring old demon needless worry, but she had to get out of the treacherous weather and warm up. Besides, she secretly delighted in this unexpected chance to be on her own in the woods again. It had been SO long since she had lain out under the stars, felt the dry grass beneath her feet, or smelled the crisp scent of the forest in late-autumn. Momo seemed just as happy with this unforeseen change of plans as well, and settled into grazing just as quickly as she had hopped from his back.

Rin smiled thankfully at the odd-looking beast, as he tore voraciously at a clump weeds. As usual, his three beady eyes were blinking slightly out of sync, and he offered her a contented low when he noticed her gaze upon him. The bull swished his tale happily, and quickly returned to ignoring her in favor of continuing his grazing. Rin snorted. Though she was very grateful for the Momo's companionship, he just wasn't the same as Aun!

Rin still missed the two-headed youkai immensely. She sighed at his memory, recalling the dragon's more adventurous nature and bravery. She remembered how he had warmed to her presence right away to become her most faithful companion and dedicated protector. She looked back at Momo with a sly grin, and shook her head. It had taken considerably longer for him to trust and accept her. Rin had initially found the youkai bull to be cantankerous, spiteful and obstinately loyal to only one master. But she had won him over in the end --- though it had taken a great deal of patient wheedling, tons of little treats, and long hours spent scratching around his horns and poll. She was really lucky, she suddenly realized. What other human girl could count such wonderful creatures as pets at one time or another? Rin stopped the direction of her thoughts with a look of deep disgust. Pets? Who was she to talk? After all, she had been nothing more than a pet as well. Naraku had certainly been right about that one point.

Little by little, Rin meandered down to the water's edge. Every day she could look upon this lake from her home high above on the mountain's peak. Until now, however, she had never surveyed it up close before. The young woman traveled slowly around the dark shore, trailing her fingers through the tall reeds. The night air was cool, but pleasantly so, and a pretty mist drifted up along the bank. A strong breeze would occasionally gust to set the fallen leaves swirling and cause bright ripples on the shadowy water. Somewhere in the distance, she could here an owl calling mournfully for its mate. For a moment, it seemed like the whole world was calm and at peace.

Rin sighed and looked up at what few stars she could see peeking through the clouds. She suddenly thought back to the night Sesshoumaru-sama had come to the forge and her cheeks heated with a deep sense of disappointment in herself for cringing and cowering. What had happened to her? When had she become so meek and diffident? She could remember a time when she feared nothing --- not even death!

She was so damn tired of being considered a useless burden. It seemed that all her life she had been unwanted! After the murders of her real parents and oniisan, the peasants in her childhood village had provided for her basic needs, but only out of moral obligation. They offered no kindness or love, and had brutally rebuffed every one of her timid advances for security and companionship. Rin vividly remembered the name-calling, the stone throwing, and, of course, the vicious beatings.

She thought Sesshoumaru-sama had saved her from all of that! For a time, she had truly believed she had found a real home and a real family --- no matter how odd that family might have seemed to outsiders.

But the cruel statements her master had uttered the night he sent her away had shaken her to the very core. She was no fool and never had any doubt that he had originally revived her only out of simple curiosity. She knew that the act of saving her was more of an exercise to stroke his own mighty ego and prove he had some mastery over his blade, rather than a show of compassion and caring. She had HOPED, however, that time might have changed his initial low opinion of her. Could it be that he really didn't care whether she lived or died now? Had it really been such a bothersome undertaking for him to endure a human's presence?

Rin's fists clenched tightly. "I'm NOT nothing!!!!" she suddenly shouted up at the sky. She ducked her head sheepishly as her words were carried off by the wind, surprised at her own sudden outburst. She was really rather grateful that no one was around to witness her strange behavior --- well, no one except for Momo, of course. She rolled her eyes and smirked back at the sight of the placid bull spinning in slow circles in search of the perfect spot to bed down. Quietly, she climbed back up the small bank.

Too tired to start a fire, she settled instead for snuggling against the massive youkai's shoulder for warmth. She curled her toes under the length of her thick green winter robe, and wished very much that she had remembered to bring an extra blanket. It was certainly going to be a long, cold night.

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Totosai was out on the ledge again at the crack of dawn. In truth, he'd never really completely left, only disappearing back into the forge whenever he'd needed to warm up or grab a sip of hot tea. The storm had abated slightly and he waited impatiently for the errant girl to make her appearance. A sudden shadow passed over head from the opposite direction than he had been expecting, startling the old smith from his renewed pacing. He looked up just in time to see Momo make a rather ungainly landing. Rin hopped from the bull's sleek back, stopping to give the creature a grateful slap on his pudgy flank. Totosai drummed his foot in annoyance and threw her a chastising look. "Hey, girl!" he rebuked, "just where the hell have you been? I've been worried sick!"

"Sorry, Ojii-sama - the pass was full of snow, and I had to make camp for the night!" she explained hurriedly. Rin gave the old man a fond hug and flashed a cloying grin.

"Cut that out! Don't you give me that look, missy!" Totosai scolded, following at her heels as she moved into the warmth of the cavern. "It's not fair and it's NOT going to work this time! I didn't know if anything had happened to you! Don't tell me you've forgotten about our `little incident' already?"

"Of course, I haven't forgotten, Ojii-sama! How could I?" she countered. A quick image of Sesshoumaru standing in this very place flashed instantly into her mind. "It's just that ---"

"Just nothing!" Totosai interrupted, punching his fist into his hand for emphasis. "We were lucky, young lady, and the only thing you can ever count on with luck is that ALWAYS runs out! What if HE comes back?

"He won't be back," the girl whispered flatly. She shook the clinging snow from her hair and marched into the arsenal hall, hoping to make it to her room quickly. She desperately wanted to warm up in her own bed and put a swift end to this little lecture on her recent behavior. "Sesshoumaru-sama has everything he wants, and `more important pursuits to follow'," she quoted. She stared at her feet and sighed. "He will not return here."

"Well --- that's not the point!" Totosai yelled, finally losing his patience. "Sesshoumaru's NOT the only demon out there, you know! Look at you --- you're unarmed, unprotected, and unprepared! You're just running around completely defenseless in the wild! You're practically begging to get killed!!!"

Rin shook with anger and humiliation. Deep inside she knew that Totosai genuinely cared for her and meant no disrespect, but she was thoroughly tired of people thinking she was weak and nothing more then a hindrance!

"Unprotected, huh?" she shouted back. Her eyes scanned through the rows of weapons gleaming on the walls, each one bursting with tremendous jyaki. Every weapon here was far too powerful for a human to even consider touching ---

Every weapon, save one. Rin's eyes came to focus automatically on a fine naginata leaning forgotten in the corner.

Sometime last month, a rather weak, but exceedingly haughty, itachi demon had arrived at the foundry to commission this particular weapon for his daughter. The insipid, spoiled youkai girl had proven to be even weaker than her sire, and Rin's cheeks still burned at the memory of her pretentious manner.

The over-bearing, orange-eyed brat had refused to accept the elegant pike as soon she found out that a human had a hand in its design. Adding insult to injury, she had cast out several biting slurs about Totosai's competency and skill level, scoffing that the blade was too weak when she proved unable to wield it properly. The snobbish pair had then stomped out of the forge with loud declarations of disgust and jeering catcalls praising Totosai's dead apprentice, the evil smith Kaijinbo.

Rin clenched her jaw in anger. That stupid weasel-girl had no one to blame but herself --- the jyaki in her fangs was SO pathetic it simply didn't contain the additional strength needed to power a blade!

But maybe, just maybe, that might work to HER advantage now --- out of all the weapons here, this one ALONE might accept handling by a human. She paused and let her glance linger critically on the light spear. Gods- she had to move quickly before she either lost her nerve or Totosai recognized her full intentions. With a determined expression, she raced across the room and reached out hastily to seize the naginata's shaft in both fists. Totosai turned at her sudden burst of movement and cried out in alarm when he realized what she'd done.

The second Rin's hands closed around the pike, she realized she might have made a BIG mistake. Jyaki was still jyaki, no matter how weak or insignificant the amount! She felt a most unpleasant tingle spreading outward from her fingertips and a crackle of sickly green light built around her wrists. Like wild-fire, the sensations and jolting energy shot up her arms and into her spine. The power continued to grow in intensity until it became a scathing burn which exploded throughout her entire form.

The naginata rattled in her grasp, dragging her around the narrow corridor as it tried to reject her hold. Rin winced as she crashed into the wall and Totosai was forced to leap back to avoid being impaled on the wildly spinning blade. But, through it all, Rin gritted her teeth and stubbornly refused to let go. That night on the battlefield with Naraku she HAD endured the torture of grasping Tenseiga! Never mind that it had only been for a few seconds and that her hands had been somewhat protected by the fabric of her sleeves! The ache from THIS measly spear was nothing compared to the pain of clutching a TRUE demon sword! Surely the strength of her will would prove greater than the pitiful amount of jyaki that went into this weapon!?!

Long minutes passed, and, inevitably, Rin found herself slowly forced to her bruised knees, inch by agonizing inch. The sweat beaded on her brow and she hung her head in near defeat. It wasn't fair that SHE was human! Why should someone as useless as that arrogant little demoness automatically be afforded respect?! Why did simply being a youkai make her better?! What tragedies had she overcome? What enemies had she ever faced and what loyalty had she ever shown!? Rin continued to concentrate all of her anger on that simpering, ungrateful itachi girl! One day, Sesshoumaru-sama would doubtlessly take a high-born creature such as THAT for his mate. Some self-glorifying, useless youkai woman would earn a place in his life, not through her actions but because of her status and race! Rin cried out from the pain raging within her body and heart. She collapsed brokenly to the floor, but still continued to obstinately try and fight on.

When the girl fell in a near-exhausted heap, Totosai was finally able to safely reach her side. The old demon slapped wildly at her hands, trying to pry her determined fingers from the shaft of the spear. Rin pushed him back weakly and still refused to relinquish her grip. She felt a serene, drowsy peace begin to wash over her. Maybe, she thought numbly, maybe it would all go away if she just went to sleep. As unconsciousness began to claim her, Rin reached deep within herself one last time in search of any hidden reserve of strength ---

And suddenly touched something of great power.

She straightened immediately, feeling an intense foreign energy flood into her limbs to push back the malicious jyaki in the blade. The weapon instantaneously stopped struggling against her attempt to claim it. Over the next few seconds, most of the pain she had been suffering began to fade.

The sounds and smells of the cavern were all abnormally muffled and muted --- almost as if her head had been plunged under water. Bit by bit, though, the world returned into focus. Rin slowly came back to herself to find Totosai yelling in panic and shaking her shoulders. She groaned and rolled to her side, fighting the furious urge to be violently sick. "What have you done, girl?" the old youkai screeched.

Rin struggled to control her shallow breathing and turned back to face him. "You - you said I shouldn't be u-unprotected a-and I knew this was the only weapon here I had ANY chance of w-wielding!" she raggedly whispered, turning the pike in her hands with a look of wonder. Though still a bit shaky and weak, Rin continued defensively, "I'm not h-helpless!" Despite the last few lingering aches, the girl finally found the strength to manage a small, triumphant smile. "D-didn't you see what I just did, Ojii-sama?" she asked proudly, running her hand along the now dormant youkai weapon.

"Yeah - I saw what you did!" Totosai shrieked, "The real question should be --- do YOU KNOW what YOU just DID?!?

Rin's overconfident smile disappeared quickly and she slowly shook her head in denial. Totosai bellowed a curse and stomped his foot. "Girl, don't you remember what I told you about the power keeping you alive!?" he roared. "Remember what I said about that piece of Sesshoumaru's youki? Well, you just found it!"

"Nani?"

Totosai ignored both her shocked look and her tiny, bewildered question. "We've already had one close call!' he rambled on, "There's NO way the boy didn't feel that!" He turned to cast a panicked look over his shoulder as if half expecting the taiyoukai to be at his threshold already.

"Feel?" Rin whispered. Her dawning comprehension had caused her already drained face to become paler still. "You mean Sesshoumaru-sama could feel ---"

"YES - don't you get it?" Totosai interrupted, "What you just touched was the little wisp of his youki --- the piece of himself he can take BACK from you if he so chooses!"

"I'm so sorry --- I had no idea!" Rin wailed. "You said I didn't have any power! How come I haven't felt anything like this before!?"

"Because you were practically dying just now, little girl!" Totosai explained in a slightly softer tone. He poked a bony finger at the naginata. "This thing here was killing you!"

Rin's brown eyes widened in a sudden flash of understanding. "Ojiisama- I'm sorry," she repeated in an exhausted voice. "I'm just so tired of feeling like this! I'm tired of being looked at as nothing more than a burden!"

"Burden?" Totosai whispered vehemently, catching her up in a fierce hug. "Never, girl --- you've never been a burden. I don't think you could be, even if you tried to --- you're way too small, you know!" He offered a lopsided, pointy-toothed grin.

Rin blinked rapidly, than shook her head at Totosai's silly attempt to lighten the mood. She tried to suppress a smile, but found she simply couldn't. "You've been so kind to me and I didn't mean to worry you, Ojii-sama." she said quietly.

"That's okay --- someone's gotta keep me on my toes!" the sword-smith laughed. He gestured again at the weapon in her hands, "You know you don't need to hold that so tightly now!"

Rin's mouth formed a grim line, and she looked down rather doubtfully. She didn't want a repeat of THAT ordeal every time she wanted to use the spear! Totosai sensed what was causing her apprehension and smiled wryly. "It's alright, girl, you'll never have to go through that again! Any weapon with jyaki has to accept its owner, and this one appears to have finally chosen you. I'm kinda glad actually --- at least I won't have to watch it collect dust in the corner." He gave her a gentle pat on the back and helped pull her to her feet, "And, at least I won't have to worry about you being defenseless so much anymore either, huh?!"

The girl smiled gratefully, and nodded, feeling an immense, unfamiliar sense of accomplishment. She wearily excused herself with another muttered apology to her new master. Totosai nodded in understanding, twirling his scraggly beard in his fingertips. He could tell the girl had something VERY important on her mind. She seemed to want to be alone, however, and for the moment, the old smith decided not to pry.

Rin hurried quickly to her bedchamber, still a bit in awe of the weapon in her hands. But something else was even MORE intriguing. She couldn't help but marvel about the power she'd very briefly connected with. THAT was really Sesshoumaru's youki? Impossible.

She would have thought HIS power would have seemed menacing and cruel. But the sensation she had just encountered had been anything but!

Admittedly, whatever she'd touched had been impossibly strong --- but it was also warm, encouraging and protective. It was surprised; but, at the same time, also inviting, open and tender.

She threw herself into her soft, comfortable bed and stared up at the smooth rock of the ceiling in confusion. Rin closed her eyes with a sigh and began to drift off.

Warm and tender? No, she thought sleepily, that couldn't be Sesshoumaru at all.

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Sesshoumaru glided swiftly through the dense southern forest. It would seem that resuming his travels had NOT improved his life or his irritable state of mind in the slightest. In fact, he realized angrily, nowadays things were steadily becoming worse ---

First of all, it had taken nearly a week to remove the horrid stench of the forge from his skin, hair and clothing. The taiyoukai still bristled at thoughts of Totosai and how the crazy old demon had successfully managed to dull his senses under a pitiful screen of smoke and ash. Damn, he absolutely HATED feeling exploited and powerless! So far, nearly every spare hour in his journey had been spent soaking in numerous small springs and creeks along the trail --- clothes, armor and all!

Even now, he shuddered at the memory of that choking smell! Strangely enough though, days later, he'd discovered that another heady scent also clung faintly to him --- actually, more specifically to the carved designs on his recently acquired o-yorai. This particular odor was NOT so unpleasant. In fact, it rather greatly reminded him of the gentle fragrance of his former ward. It was positively ludicrous. He'd merely cast it off as further evidence that he needed to get on with his life, and simply decided to scrub at the elegant new armor till no trace remained.

Secondly, despite all his methodical and thorough hunting, the search for Naraku was proving fruitless and yielding no leads whatsoever. He could find simply no sign of the scheming half-demon anywhere! It was beyond frustrating that a creature with so much evil jyaki could just cleanly vanish at will. For the briefest moment, he had even debated seeking out the weakling hanyou to see if he'd heard any word or noticed any clues. He had very quickly come back to his senses and decided that he just wasn't up for THAT level of aggravation at the current moment.

And FINALLY --- and most disturbingly perhaps --- there was that unsettling little incident yesterday morning. It had been early dawn, and he was reclining against the trunk of a tree, comfortably lost somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. Quite surprisingly, there had been the strangely real feeling of small, cool hands trailing gently along his cheeks and throat, edging lower to caress his chest with teasing softness. At first, he'd simply thought he was about to enjoy a rather pleasurable dream, when suddenly the soothing sensations had abruptly changed into something --- SOMETHING ELSE. It had felt as though burning fingers were reaching to plunge and twist deep within his belly, and there was an insistent tug at his power. Sesshoumaru grimaced, thinking back to how he'd come fully awake at that moment with a harsh cry of surprise, drenched in sweat and gasping deeply for breath.

Just what the HELL was that anyway? The only times he'd ever felt something remotely similar were the two occasions when Naraku had sought to absorb his youki. But though THIS pull had seemed just as urgent and demanding, this time he had the distinct impression that there was no real malice behind the act. The power that touched him had felt familiar somehow, almost --- almost like his own?! The stoic taiyoukai thoroughly detested being this confused and out of control. Could he actually be under some kind of spell? Impossible, he scoffed.

Sesshoumaru paused momentarily and meticulously adjusted the two swords at his hip. His one comfort was that he'd reach his intended destination today. He needed to find answers quickly and, thankfully, knew of at least one dignified and reliable source for information. He would seek out Bokuseno --- the only creature whose counsel he had come to trust since Chichiue's death. The ancient tree demon heard everything and knew all that was going on in his forests faster than the wind could rattle through his leaves. Surely, he'd have some information on Naraku, at the very least!

The taiyoukai continued on, weaving steadily through the tall, stately trees. The filtered sunlight cast eerie shadows on the mossy forest floor, and the crisp autumn air suddenly seemed rather stagnant and stuffy. He entered a hidden glade and stopped before an impressive, gnarled old magnolia tree. Sesshoumaru waited patiently as the bark twisted and groaned to contort into a wizened old face.

"Bokuseno ---" He offered a quick, courteous nod in greeting.

"Well, what have we here?" called out a slow, booming voice in return. "The son of the great dog demon? I have not seen you in ages. You have changed of late --- you look much like your father."

Sesshoumaru frowned, but Bokuseno continued on before he could react to the comment.

"And where is the little one?" the tree inquired pleasantly. His dark eyes darted around the clearing in search of Rin. "Where is that sweet girl that always sought to reach my petals?"

Bokuseno chuckled deeply, causing the ground to vibrate somewhat. "Why, I remember the time she climbed so high, and you sent that grumbling toad up into my boughs to retrieve her. I had not been that amused for over a hundred years!"

Sesshoumaru's brows lowered in resentment and his frown deepened into a scowl. Just when he believed he had the girl out of his thoughts, someone had to go and remind him. Did Rin somehow manage to force her way into the hearts and fond memories of every demon she ever encountered? Apparently so, he sneered to himself, as he took note of Bokuseno's expectant and anxious expression.

"Rin is a child no longer, but a woman grown. This Sesshoumaru has finally returned her to be among her OWN kind," he replied, forcing as much disdain as possible into his voice. He fervently hoped that the sage old youkai would pick up on his annoyance and settle on a more suitable topic of discussion. If anything, however, the ancient being appeared to be even MORE interested in the girl's fate now.

"Oh?" Bokuseno asked unhurriedly, clearly very perplexed. "And just WHAT kind is that?"

Nani? The taiyoukai blinked in confusion. It seemed perhaps that age might have caught up with Bokuseno at last. Had his once great mind now become as empty and feeble as Totosai's? Had he forgotten the simple and obvious fact that Rin was human? Sesshoumaru automatically shifted back a step, as if afraid this madness and memory loss were a plague.

"Wait!" thundered Bokuseno. "Do not go! Tell me, you did not really send HER back to a ningen village?"

"Of course, I did!" he snapped irritably in return. "Where else would she belong? She was human herself!"

Sesshoumaru thought the pointless matter was fully resolved and looked down in blatant disappointment. His original intentions of asking about any rumors regarding Naraku's whereabouts were completely forgotten --- clearly Father's old friend had lost all his wits! The dog demon felt a small, uncharacteristic pang of guilt. Maybe he should have sought out this youkai's counsel more frequently over the years. Perhaps if the tree demon had experienced temporary companionship or been engaged in conversation a bit more regularly, his once broad intellect wouldn't have faded. Sesshoumaru sighed and turned to leave.

"Wait - the girl wasn't human!" Bokuseno bellowed out at his retreating back. "Well, at least not entirely anymore! After all, what about your `gift'?!" The venerable demon's rough face suddenly contorted in panic. "Wait - you did not take `it' back by any chance?!"

In spite of himself, Sesshoumaru turned and stalked back to the large tree, his interest clearly piqued. "Of what do you speak? What gift? Take `what' back?!" he questioned rapidly through gritted teeth.

Bokuseno's replies were just as vehement. "I speak of the girl's life, of course --- of the power you endowed to her with Tenseiga?! With her new youkai life-span, surely you could have found a suitable demon to be her mate, rather than some failing, anonymous human!"

"Why, I even half thought you planned on taking her for yourself one day!" The tree's yellowing leaves shook with sudden mirth. "I had thought it was a bit peculiar at first, YOU taking in one so young, but I knew she would not stay small forever!"

Sesshoumaru felt an uncomfortable chill run up his spine, the sensation eerily akin to that foreign feeling he'd experienced yesterday morning. What the hell was going on? What had he done to Rin?! Tenseiga had imparted some sort of power to her that made her --- made her no longer quite human?! He shook his head in confusion. "I-I do not understand," he stammered.

Bokuseno looked on in shock. The taiyoukai's normally pale complexion had turned such a bloodless white that even the stripes on his high cheekbones appeared somewhat muted.

"Er - well, surely you knew, my lord? You have possessed the Tenseiga for so long now, I believed you had mastered it and knew something of its history and powers," the tree stated haltingly. "Did you not know that your father had it forged out of his deep remorse for Sesseika-sama's death, and also to eternally keep his second mate, the human woman, Izayoi?"

Despite his current state of shock, Sesshoumaru suddenly stiffened as if in immense pain. "You will never mention that whore and MY mother's name in the same sentence!!" he snarled, baring his fangs.

Bokuseno frowned angrily at the taiyoukai's heated response, and his branches waved through the air in unmistakable threat. The old creature was not accustomed to being disrespected. His heavy brows knit together in ire, yet he continued on leisurely, as if he hadn't been so rudely interrupted at all.

"Did you never wonder why your father bequeathed that sword to YOU in the first place?" he asked slowly.

The young demon could only shake his head in numb denial.

"Inutaisho truly felt that through his mistakes you were cheated of so much. In the end, he could hardly recognize what had become of his own first-born son. You were so distant, so hostile, so vengeful --- it wounded him more than you know. He firmly believed that he owed you the ability to heal your troubled heart and never suffer a loss such as that again."

Sesshoumaru's breaths were coming in great heaving pants, but still Bokuseno would not stop.

"Even if you were not aware of the Tenseiga's past or purposes, or your Father's lofty hopes, surely --- with your great power --- you could have sensed that little piece of yourself within the girl's soul?" the old demon asked intently.

A little piece of himself in Rin's soul?

That was the breaking point. With that one measured question, Sesshoumaru found he could no longer support himself upright. The demon lord's knees buckled and he slid inelegantly to the soft forest floor, momentarily too stunned to speak.

He tried to think about his strange former companion --- tried to remember everything about her, and how he felt in her presence. Too many memories and unfamiliar feelings rushed through him at once, and he reflexively bristled with rage. Rin was connected to him?! That strange, invasive feeling from yesterday --- could that have been HER? He growled and staggered awkwardly back to his feet. This simply couldn't be possible!

"No," he whispered dangerously, mostly to himself. His heart raced and his vision began to swim dizzily. "You are mistaken."

Bokuseno instantly recognized the angry rise in energy and sought to calm the growing agitation building in the dog demon's youki. He didn't know what was more disturbing: the taiyoukai's wildly spiking power, or his cold, unfeeling look. He thought of the small, young girl --- wherever she might be now. He considered her safety and suddenly regretted being so harsh on this eldest son of his noble friend. "Wait, my lord," the wise old tree soothed, "Do not do anything rash."

Sesshoumaru threw back his head and barked out a guttural laugh. "Tell me, old Bokuseno, if you dare," he hissed, "when has this Sesshoumaru EVER done anything rash?"

"I mean no disrespect," the demon responded coolly. "I simply have no wish to see you do something you WILL come to regret, my lord."

Bokuseno's beseeching pleas for the taiyoukai to remain calm seemed to have the opposite effect. All of Sesshoumaru's thoughts were lost in scattered turmoil and a shadow of bitterness filled his mind. What in the hell was going on? Had he fallen so far now that any demon could question his actions or motives? Even a demon as renowned and esteemed as Bokuseno had no right to rebuke him! When had he EVER miscalculated? When had he EVER done anything rash or something he'd regret? He looked down solemnly at Tenseiga and his golden eyes narrowed in pure fury --- at the moment, he only could think of ONE occasion.

He whirled suddenly and raced from the tiny clearing, even as the tree demon continued to beg for him to stop. The resonating voice of Bokuseno echoed out and faded behind him, but Sesshoumaru would not heed those rumbling cries. He was completely lost in a dark, single-minded purpose.

It looked like he would be honoring his pathetic half-brother with a little visit, after all. He needed to find Rin and confirm the truth with his own eyes

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BaBa-Buummm. Cue the dramatic music. (Great, now I have the Shinchinin-tai theme stuck in my head!)

Sorry, this chapter is short! Work's been busy. Argh. BUT - delivered as promised --- one mini-mental-meltdown for Sesshoumaru (those are always the best parts of the anime or manga - when Sess freaks out for an instant and gets THAT look!).

Sorry - I haven't been able to read any comments for a few days. Like I said, work is evil. My next update, will probably be sometime next week.

Oh - good news! The third Inuyasha movie is scheduled for release on June 11th. Yeah!!! (Monty Python Style!) Well, scheduled for release in Japan. Boo! (also Monty Python Style!). I so can't wait for that one!

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Mini-Glossary -

itachi: weasel (figured I'd make the spoiled, nasty girl mentioned in the chapter a weasel demon --- seemed fitting!)

jyaki: a youkai's evil power (though I'm sure everyone's got this one down already!)

naginata: a spear with a rather long point, usually just as wide as the shaft; was once kind of a women's traditional weapon

nani: what?

Ojii-sama: a respectful way of saying "grandpa"/old man

Oniisan: older brother

Oh, in the dream a few chapters back? When Sesshoumaru said "Omae no orokana ningen no kokoro" to Rin - Roughly: "Your foolish human heart."

Chichiue - very respectful term for father (honored father)

Ningen - human

O-yorai - the style of armor of the time-period, I hope!

Oh yeah - and I think SODE is the term for the shoulder piece and spikes! I've also seen it used for "sleeve" (Aren't library cards awesome?!)

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Boots N Spurs - Gracias! (I think I spelled that right! It's been a long time since high school Spanish for me!)

Madartiste - Thanks! I really needed that!

Sesshorin - Thank you for all the nice comments! I love your "user-name"

Isilwath - Hi! Nice to meet you! I think we're on a few of the same mailing lists! I'm one of those pathetic lurkers!

Lynx 9: I'll keep those updates coming!

Dark Phoenix: Thanks so much for all the constructive criticism --- I'm pretty new at all this! I'll try and keep the white hairs to a minimum! Don't think it would suit me as much as it suits Sess! A doujinshi would be awesome though! Might have to break out the old art supplies!

Anhimals - Thanks very much! Hope you're feeling better!

Non-school - Believe me, I wanted to make Rin pop out too, but trust me --- it's going to be more fun later!

Inuyasha Princess - Wow! Can't believe you reviewed everything! Thanks!

Next chapter will probably be up Wednesday, I think? Once again I apologize for the typos, but I still haven't found a beta reader!