InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Incomplete ❯ Chapter 12 ( Chapter 12 )

Kagome awoke just as Ah-Un touched down in a small clearing. Still rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, she sat up and looked around confused.

"Ah-Un, what are we doing here?" she asked softly.

Half expecting an answer, she looked at the demon and both heads blinked back at her. Hm, maybe not.

With a small sigh, she climbed down off the demon's broad back and paced around the clearing to stretch her legs.

"What are you doing Kagome?" she asked, running her fingers through her hair in frustration.

"He loves Kikyo. He's never going to give her up. How long are you going to let yourself stand by and get hurt?"

Though the truth behind her words should've brought relief, it weighed heavily on her heart. She didn't want it to be true. She didn't want to admit that she'd wasted so much time loving someone who was never going to be hers.

Kagome hung her head sullenly and stared at a small tuft of grass between her feet. An image of Sesshomaru suddenly flashed through her mind and she almost laughed out loud at the irony of the situation. A few days ago she could barely get away from him fast enough, and now his palace seemed like the only friendly place in the world. She could go home through the well, of course, but then she'd have to field question after question from her family about how Inuyasha was doing and when he'd be coming to visit next. She just didn't have the strength to handle any of that right now.

"Would it be so bad?" she pondered aloud, debating whether to make the journey back to Sesshomaru's lands. Her gaze lifted to Ah-Un and the demon snuffed a heavy sigh through its nose. Kagome sighed as well. During her brief stay at the palace she'd begun to think of him as someone other than Inuyasha's brother, but she had no illusions about the type of man he was. He hadn't ever given her the impression he wanted her to stay any longer than she had. It was foolish to go back there. But all the same, she somehow felt like he could make it better.

Hearing Ah-Un groan she turned to find Sesshomaru standing at the edge of the clearing. He was dressed once more in a brilliant white kimono and had new armour to protect his chest. She could only stare up at him blankly, her eyes meeting the cool amber of his gaze. Before she could stop to think, she'd launched herself at his chest. Clutching his kimono tightly with one hand, she used the other to angrily beat on him.

Startled, Sesshomaru stared down at her, unsure how to react to this unwelcome intrusion of his personal space.

"It was all a lie," she whispered painfully, her voice thick with tears. "Every word."

Understanding slowly dawned and his features settled into their usual dispassionate mask. The sound of the girl's quiet sobs was a burden on his ears. He closed his eyes against the sound and clenched his jaw shut. Annoyed with her weak punches, he grabbed her wrist and held it fast.

"Miko, stop this."

The look she gave him was pathetic. In the course of a day the miko who'd insisted, despite his vehement protests, on healing his injuries had become this pitiful creature. The miko who refused to give up or die by his hand had been reduced to this. He found it utterly distasteful. He caught her chin between his fingers and took his time studying her features. Her eyes were begging him for some word of comfort, some gentle reassurance that everything would work itself out, but that wasn't the type of demon he was. He couldn't offer words of comfort when he had none to give.

Something in her eyes drew him in; a tiny glimmer of trust. He doubted its existence at first, but her eyes held no wariness or apprehension in their depths. She didn't fear him and perhaps she never had. He found the revelation intriguing. She was such an odd creature. It took a moment before he realized how close his body had been drawn to hers and another for him to pull away. Her gaze held his a moment before she reluctantly broke the connection.

Her fingers slowly loosened their hold on his kimono and eventually fell away.

"I'm sorry...," she whispered. "I shouldn't... I'm sorry."

The unpredictable wind shifted at her words, bearing with it the promise of unwanted trouble. He 'tsked' with annoyance and rested his hand atop the sword at his hip.

The miko noticed and fixed him with an expression that was filled with as much curiosity as it was confusion.

"Sesshomaru, why are you here?"

oOo

Propelled by fear, Inuyasha's feet moved like the wind, barely touching the rough terrain below. His mind and his heart were focused and united in their goal - finding Kagome. It was the only thing that mattered. If he didn't get to her before she went through the well, if he didn't explain, she might never come back. And he had to make her understand...somehow. He still couldn't find the words, not the right ones anyway, not ones that would make her stay.

Shit, he cursed silently as he pushed off a downed tree. He'd really screwed up this time.

It was another 20 acres before he caught the first hint of her scent on the air. The blood was pounding in his ears and his lungs burned, but the adrenaline kept him moving forward. Faster and faster he ran, like a hunter closing in on its prey. He couldn't stop now, not when she was so close.

Her scent was heavy on the air now, warm and familiar. He breathed it in greedily, a small part of him noting that it might be for the last time. And then another scent hit him, one that made his feet slow and his heart turn in his chest. She was crying. The scent of her tears perverted the air, lingering and almost tangible like a dense fog. His footsteps faltered and he braced a hand against the nearst tree.

Kagome was the only person who'd never hurt him and it seemed like all he ever did these days was make her cry.

The wind stirred up a bundle of dry leaves at his feet and brought some unwelcome memories into focus. Images of her face flashed before his mind - her fear after he'd attacked her, her tears as she'd told him to leave, and just now... the acceptance on her face as she'd taken off his rosary...

His body deflated as the futility of his quest slowly sunk in.

"Kagome..."

He glanced up at the clearing and felt his stomach knot. She was right to leave and he had no right to ask her to come back. Not after what he'd put her through. It was a miracle she'd stayed with him this long. Still, he couldn't leave. His heart wouldn't let him move forward, but his body wouldn't let him go back, so he stood in limbo thirty paces away from the clearing and her.

That was, until an unwelcome scent made its presence known. Cursing under his breath, he narrowed his eyes at the break in the tree line.

"Sesshomaru! What the Hell is he doing here?"

He didn't think. His body moved on instinct alone, running in a wide arc to the other side of the clearing to ensure his own scent was kept downwind. There, he crept to the forest's edge and watched the scene before him unfold.

Sure enough they were both standing in the clearing - Kagome wiping tears from her cheeks while Sesshomaru watched. Questions of what his brother was doing there kept his mind turning but it was their proximity that had his stomach churning. Sesshomaru was unpredictable and merciless and Kagome wasn't armed. All it would take was one wrong move, one word he didn't like and there'd be nothing left of her but a bloody corpse.

The minute Sesshomaru raised a claw he'd be on him faster than the wind, but for now instinct told him to wait. No sense stirring up trouble when the pot didn't need to be stirred - that was what Kaede always said anyway. It was her favourite line of the moment for Shippo, who'd only become more fox-like as he grew older.

He was content to wait in silence, hiding just beyond the tree line until the unthinkable happened. He watched in horror as Kagome threw herself at Sesshomaru and attacked him with her fists. He could tell by his brother's countenance that she wasn't doing him any damage, but that didn't mean he'd tolerate it either. Merciful and patient were not words that had ever described Sesshomaru.

"Damn it!" he cursed. "What the hell is she doing? Asking for a death sentence?"

The realization that that might be exactly what she was doing, and that it was also entirely his fault, did not sit well.

When Sesshomaru grabbed hold of her wrist and held her fast, his claws wrapped tight around Tetsusaiga's hilt. There was no telling what his brother might do next, but he didn't intend to sit around and watch while she got flayed alive. She may hate him for intruding, but he'd vowed to protect her with his life and that was one promise he intended to keep.

Withdrawing Tetsusaiga, he let out a cry and tore into the clearing.

"Get your hands off of her Sesshomaru!" he snarled, his features contorted by rage.

Sesshomaru lifted an eyebrow at the fang aimed at his chest and his hand rested atop his Tokijin.

"Find other ways to amuse yourself, Inuyasha. I have no patience for one of your tantrums today."

"Bastard... I said get away from her!"

The winds circled Tetsusaiga's blade in preparation for an attack. Sesshomaru closed his eyes and let out an impatient sigh before turning to Kagome.

"Deal with him or I will."

She stepped between them and let out an audible 'tsk' of disgust. However, her eyes and all the anger and pain in them were directed solely at him. Startled, Inuyasha fell back a few paces and lowered his fang.

"What are you doing here?" she demanded, her tone hard.

"I... I..."

He growled low, frustrated by his own lack of words.

"Look, I'm sorry. Will you at least let me explain?"

"I've heard and seen everything I need to, thanks," she snapped and he shrunk back a little further. "I'm perfectly fine here so you can go back whenever you like."

"Not unless you're coming with me."

"Not a chance."

He sighed heavily and slowly sheathed his fang. He'd known going in this wasn't going to be easy but the reality was so much harder than he'd expected.

"I'm... I'm going to stay with Sesshomaru," she announced, sounding a little hesitant. Judging by his brother's raised eyebrow, this was news to him as well.

"Miko, do not drag this Sesshomaru into your quarrels with Inuyasha."

She had the decency to lower her eyes and blush sheepishly.

"Regardless," he added, casting a significant look in his direction, "your invitation to stay at the palace remains open."

She nodded and offered him a grateful bow.

Inuyasha could feel the rage slowly building inside of him, like the pressure in a covered pot of boiling water. The muscles in his hands twitched to draw Tetsusaiga again and it took great effort to clench them into fists instead. Like hell she was staying at that bastard's palace where he couldn't protect her. Besides, they'd just got her back!

"Kagome, think about what you're saying," he ground out, the tension in his body making his jaw rigid. "I know you're mad at me, I get that, but staying with Sesshomaru is...!"

"Is what?" she demanded, putting her hands on her hips.

"Suicide," he finished, his expression grave.

Sesshomaru said nothing, but did not look pleased with this assessment.

"Come back with me. Please."

He didn't often use 'please' when it came to asking things of her. Usually he preferred to grouse and gripe until he got what he wanted but he could see how that single word made her waver.

I can do better. Give me a chance to prove it!

"At least...at least give it some time," he muttered, trying to stall. "Think it over or something."

The hurt expression on his face must have had an impact because after a few seconds of impatiently tapping her foot and blowing out sighs of frustration she relented.

"Okay, fine. I'll think about it. But I want to go home first."

He nodded sullenly, understanding what she meant - 'home' was through the other side of the well, the one place he couldn't follow.

"I can take you back unless..."

He glanced between her and Sesshomaru and felt the slightly sick feeling return to his stomach. What did she see in someone like him anyway?

Probably the same thing she saw in a selfish hanyou, a quiet voice reminded him.

"I have business to attend to." His brother's voice was cool calm, like the ocean after the storm.

"Miko," he added with a nod in her direction.

"Inuyasha."

His name dripped with disdain but there was no time for a rebuttal before Sesshomaru departed in a swish of silk with Ah-Un in tow. Kagome kept her eyes trained on his back, watching him depart until long after he'd disappeared behind the tree line. The first stinging barb of jealousy found its home somewhere in the vicinity of his heart.

"You aren't seriously thinking about going with him are you?"

His eyes searched hers for answers but found only doubt and confusion. Feeling uneasy he 'keh'd' and shoved his hands into his sleeves. He couldn't let her see how badly they were trembling. The thought of losing her forever terrified him, even if it was only to his brother's pack. He'd grown too used to having her around, and far too dependent on her strength to keep him in line. Whatever her decision he would always be there for her, but that didn't make it any easier in the meantime.

Her hand found his shoulder and her touch was soft and warm despite their harsh words from earlier.

"Take me to the well? Please?"

His shoulders drooped as the fight left his body. He wanted to be angry but he had no right to be. He was the cause of this. He was the one who'd driven her away. He hadn't expected her to turn to Sesshomaru for comfort, but then, maybe he didn't know her as well as he thought. Consenting, he crouched low so she could get on his back and closed his eyes as she climbed on, memorizing the feel of her warm body wrapped around his.

If she went with Sesshomaru, he would never carry her like this again.

More regrets cropped up in his mind as he navigated the way back to the well. Each one stirred the anxious storm in his gut, adding to his sense of unease until it'd become full blown panic. What was he going to do without her? What about the others? And the remaining jewel shards? Was she ready to give all of them up too? There were too many questions and not a single answer he could offer to any of them.

He took his time covering the distance to the well, taking small detours she wouldn't notice here and there to buy himself some more time. He needed time to think, to find the magic words that would fix this. It was up to him to make things right again. By the time they arrived at the edge of the Bone Eater's Well an hour later, he was no closer to finding them.

Reluctantly, he set her down gently on the grass. The panic he'd been fighting the entire trip became something tangible that crept into his chest and made it tight despite his best efforts to stamp it down. She was really leaving him this time and he had no idea when or if she would return.

The sound of her shoes against the well's ragged wooden edge brought him to his senses. Reacting instantly, he spun around and grabbed hold of her wrist to keep her from jumping. She looked surprised, but didn't fight his grip.

"Kagome…I really do love you, you know," he said, his eyes pleading with her to stay.

A small smile graced her lips, but it faded before the warmth could reach her eyes.

"I know," she answered softly, her tone reassuring.

It took every ounce of willpower he possessed to open his fingers and give her freedom. Defeated, he let go and watched her disappear into the well's murky depths.

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Author's Note: This chapter has been heavily revised from its original version, so I hope you guys like the changes! Please let me know what you think. Kagome has some big decisions to make. I'd love to hear your thoughts on her decision. Until next time...