InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Love the Way You Lie ❯ One-Shot

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Disclaimer:  I do not own the characters of Inuyasha, or the Song Love the Way You Lie by Rihanna and Eminem, nor do I make any profits from them.

-oOo-

Kagome stared at Inuyasha, meeting his gaze for several long moments before looking away and clenching a fist, unable to continue looking in his eyes.

Kagome... I care for you... there's love for you in my heart, his gaze seemed to say.  But the guilt also in his eyes ate those words away, and they always remained unvoiced.  

Eyes closing around the pain in them, tears still managed to squeeze from beneath clenched lids, and she turned and began to walk away from him and the rest of the group.

“I need to be alone for a while, so please, don't come looking for me,”  she said softly as she paused in her step for a moment.

“Kagome...”  Inuyasha said, reaching for her, guilt now licking through his voice as well;  he flinched when she didn't even acknowledge him, simply continuing to walk away.

The rest of the group stayed quiet, watching the aftermath of yet another visit to the undead miko that held Inuyasha's heart and soul in her hands.

It always ended the same.

-oOo-

It hurts when he looks at me like that.

She sighed, tears still making their slow way down pale cheeks as she tried in vain to chase the memory of his eyes away.  A strangled sob broke from her throat as she thought about it, and her heart constricted.

I love the way you lie to me, Inuyasha, with those beautiful eyes saying things you'd never say out loud.  Because, really, they aren't true.  You may care for me... but your heart belongs to Kikyou, and I'm only in the way.  

There's no room for me between you...

More pain shafted through her at that thought – it was one she'd had many times before.  It was simply the truth, though it hurt like hellfire to admit it.

But she'd  never been one for lying to herself, and she wasn't about to start now.  No... all the lies would come from Inuyasha... such sweet, sweet lies.  She wanted so badly to believe them.

Like the time, after Akago, when he'd sworn never to leave her again.  She'd actually called him on that one, telling him to his face he was a liar.  He'd gotten angry, but... she knew him too well.  They both knew that if Kikyou came around again, he'd go after her.  After all, every single time but once that it had come down to a choice between her and Kikyou, he'd chosen Kikyou.   One time only had he chosen to stay with her.

And she was still surprised when she thought about that night.   Honestly, though, she was pretty sure she knew why he'd stayed that one time – it was because she'd actually broken down, and let him see how much it hurt – how much she hurt.   She'd told him she hated him that night... though it wasn't true, it had hurt him, and shocked him, too, she was sure.  It was that that had gotten him to stay.

It had frightened him – made him think that he was about to lose her.

But despite the constant pain, she couldn't let go.  Sometimes she wondered if she was becoming a masochist.  It brought to mind some lyrics she'd watched Yuka translate from an American song one day for a project in English class...

'Just gonna stand there and watch me burn... but that's all right, because I like the way it hurts... Just gonna stand there and hear me cry, but that's all right, because I love the way you lie...'

Yeah... I thought those lyrics were strange, back then, but now... they rip me open and leave me bare for all the world to see.

She dropped her head into her hands as the tears picked up pace, and knowing that she needed to let it out, she didn't even attempt to hold back the pain, a wailing cry coming from her lips that she'd never let anyone from Sengoku Jidai actually hear.  

And just then, the heavens opened up, and rain fell like her grief had made the Kami themselves cry for her.  Lifting her face, she let her own tears drown in the drops that landed against her sore eyes and drawn cheeks – it felt so good, so cool on her overheated face.

Rain down on me... cool the fire that burns in me, always torturing me, she thought sadly, standing motionless in the rain as the clouds burst open and sheets of rain hit in a torrent of cold, drenching her completely within seconds.

Yet still, she was hot, even as she closed her eyes and let the water pour itself over her with wide-open, welcoming arms.  All she wanted was for the burning, heated pain in her heart to stop – for the rain to give her surcease.  

Because it was certain that it wouldn't stop at Inuyasha's own hands.

She didn't even flinch as the  rain pounded her skin, simply turning her face down to stare at the ground as her hair stuck to her skin, pressed completely straight by the weight of the water, and her clothes clung to her body.  She was absolutely dripping... and she didn't even care.

It took a little while for the rain to slow, but it did, finally, and Kagome stared at the silvery flashes of the raindrops pierced by the moonlight that was drifting down between the clouds as the storm began to break up.  She finally felt numb, the fire no longer burning her, the pain cooled to a distant ache by the chill that had invaded her flesh from the storm.   The breeze only helped that along, and she sighed almost inaudibly as she shivered.

I suppose... I should go back now.  But... I almost don't want to.  It feels so good to be numb – it's been so long since I've felt anything other than sad.  It's the most peace I've had in so long, and I don't want to give that up.

She looked out over the forest from the small hill she was standing on, and winced, then – she could see the silvery brilliance of her previous incarnations shinidamachu winding through the trees in the far distance, as the woman made her way to wherever it was she was going after her meeting with Inuyasha.

She told me once that she's always cold – and that she hates it.  But... in a way, she's lucky.  She'll never burn.  Burning hurts worse than the cold.

Shaking her head, she let out a strangled laugh, and turned on her heel to make her way down the small hill, heading for the cave her friends had decided to camp in.  It was only a matter of time before Inuyasha or Sango came looking, and she didn't want to answer the questions she would have gotten from the one, or dodge the guilty looks she'd have gotten from the other.

No, at least for tonight, she just wanted to remain cold and numb...

And avoid any more beautiful lies from the golden eyes of the hanyou she loved.

The hanyou that couldn't give her his heart...

Because it was already taken.

What an ugly truth to live with...

-oOo-

A/N: This short introspective came from an AMV by Midnight Phenomenon to a song by Rihanna called Love the Way You Lie over on Youtube.  It's just under a minute, but well worth the watch.  If you want to see it, here's the link, simply take out the spaces:

http: // www. Youtube. com/user /MidnightPhenomenon #p/u/18/ vYg5yAncOWU



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