InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Under Anothers Watchful Eye ❯ The Steps To Normancy ( Chapter 16 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha and company. Soul rights belong to Rumiko Takashi

Note: -*-*-*- Means we are seeing a dream. It will not be in italic.

Note: 'This is how it will be written if it is thought to ones self.'

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Demons had no patince what so ever, and thus were very on edge. But now, as he sat holding the ebony girl in his arms, listening to the rise and fall of her gental breath aginst his... even his demon side began to wonder. Was what he and Kikyo had love? And if not, was all these new emotions he felt for Kagome love? Real love?

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Demons have an instinct. They know who is to be their mate. Who is to be the one they are to mark, to claim. It pounded aginst him over and over agian- Kagome, Kagome, Kagome.

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Looking back, did he regret the things he felt? He felt like some one had cared. That was enough at the time. But now... Now he had more. And he found that what more ment, was actually asking very little. What Kikyo had done for him, was be a friend, she gave her said her fears to him, and no one else. Kagome... she accepted him. She gave everything that she had, that she owned, for him. She would give him the world if she could. But she already had. She had given him, her heart.

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If he accepted what ever Kagome was offering, that would mean he would be accepting her feelings in return. He could not avoid it any longer. And truthfully, he did not want to. He was afriad to admit that he loved Kagome. He did not like her. For he liked Kikyo. He did not love her as he loved a mother, nor like he loved any object that he could name or find. No he loved Kagome in her own way that could only be called just that. The way he loved Kagome. InuYasha loved her as... A mate.

No. He was not scared any longer to admit that he loved Kagome... Inwardly at least. He was scared to tell it to her. Because... What if she did not feel the same, or as strongly. Prehaps... Prehaps she did. Little things could have told him so, but it was a leap he was just not ready to take. And all of a sudden, he hurt. His heart throbbed loudly in his chest as he realized why.


'I... I love Kagome. I am not scared, and wont denie it any more. I do. But.... But... Does she love me?'

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"In..."


She tried.

"In..."


But she failed. It all failed.


Who are you calling for? The voice said. Panic riseing deeply in its tone. It was so familar... so... known to her. Who was it, or more so to the point... What was it?


"I am calling Inu..." She breathed out....


"INUYASHA! I am calling InuYasha! He will save me! He has to! He promised to protect me!"

No! How could that possibly be for you? It was promised to some one else.


"Yes. But he promised it to me too."


Thats not true. He was lying to you.


"No! He wasnt! He would never let anything hurt me!"


And what makes you uphold such importance in his life?


"He.... He cares about me....."


You must truely be blind. Only a fool would believe such actions .


"No! I am not a fool!"


Then why would he say such a thing? Why would he say he would protect you? Make makes you think he cares?


"Because he means it!"


She fell backwards. As if hitting her hard on the head, it came back. Everything came back.

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For a split second, Kagome thought that she was danceing, twirling about in such a fashion that it made the world spin. Her eyes were glued shut, and yet still, she could feel the glare of the early days sun. What time was it? Where was she? There were other people here. Kagome could feel their breath hovering above her own, and each movement that one of them made, it was like a bomb was set off next to her.

Slowly, choclate eyes greeted the world, only to be shut agian. She blinked back the day, squinting deeply. Kagome was unsettled by the whole world. Why was it moving, danceing, spinning? Why couldnt it just keep still? The people that she sensed where all around her. At once, when they realized that she came to, they flung themselfs at her.

"Kagome!" One shouted. It was the voice of Shippos. Although it was loved and welcomed, it was not who she wanted to hear.

"Kagome! Are you alright?" Came next of that of Sango. Still not the voice she seeked.

"Yes Kagome, we all have been worried about you." Miroku.... He was there too.... Just, where was InuYasha?

"Yes, I am alright. What happened?" She asked, sitting up.

"Kagome, you dont remember? You lost your memory!" The kitsune replyed to her question. But her attention was focused else where.

Thats right. She had forgotten. Everything, and all at once names and places all came together. InuYasha, herself, Shippo, Sango, Miroku. Everyone! Her mother, grandfather, Buyo. Hojo, Koga. The demons. The shards. Kaeda, Her arrows, InuYashas sword. The bone eaters well. School, math, science, grades, her failing test. Sesshomaru, Jakken, Rin. Naraku, Kagura, Kanna. Kikyo... Her mind seemed to be going on circles as every thing once agian made sense. She looked at the faces of her concerned loved ones.

Sango, dear, sweet Sango. Black hair and matching eyes. She has a scar across her back, reminding her of her heart ache. She is in love with the monk...

Miroku... He is more decent than what he appers. He is a loving person, but a bit of a pervert. No, he is a pervert.

Shippo. He is so young, and yet has suffered though most grown people. His parents were killed off by the thunder brothers.

InuYasha. Where... Where is InuYasha? She scanned around until she caught a glimpse of him.

Her brown eyes peered the room, until they landed upon a figure laying motionless in the corner. Its body was limp, and badly wounded. The person was laying shirtless with bandages straped across his bare chest. A sword lay at his side, as if it was there to give him strength. Painic arose in Kagome. What had happened to InuYasha?

"Wh... Wha... Inu..." Was all she managed to get out.

"InuYasha is fine Kagome. He was in a battle the other night, protecting you. It was a great bear demon who had three jewel shards. We gained them, but it left InuYasha quite wounded." Sango said, reading her racing mind.

"The demon that we fought had pleagued a near by village, and in their thanks, they offered us shelter." Miroku said. She glanced around. They were in a hut. When had they got there, and why had she not noticed?

She crawled her way over to the limp body. As she neared, she saw the imprints of the battle. It was all her fault that he was this way. Injured and helpless. It was always her. Why did she have to have such bad luck? Prehaps it would be best if she left the group all together...

"Inu... Yasha...." She said, as she pressed her palm to his wounded chest. Her mind was totally zoned in on him. Nothing else in the world existed. Her mind had one thing in repeated over and over like a broken record: InuYasha! InuYasha! InuYasha!

"Come on, lets see if we can gather up more branches for the fire." Sango said, leaveing Kagome alone to see InuYasha in peace and privacy.

Kagome moved her index finger across his check. She stroked along his jaw line, tracing his features. She saw his eyes close tighter together, and a eager smile lit her face.

"Ka... Kagome...?" He breathed out, in a weak, defeated tone.

"InuYasha? InuYasha, Im right here. What happened to you?"

"You dont remember that either? You havent remembered anything?"

"InuYasha! I did! I remembered everything! I remember Shippo, and Sango and Miroku. The demons and the Shikon No Tama. The battles and..." She paused for a moment.

"And I remember you..." He gave off a faint smile. Kagome gave it in return. An instint blush came to her face when she realized that her hand was now rested upon his shoulder. She instintly removed it, as his amber eyes followed her the whole time.

"InuYa... What... What happened to you?"

"You asked if I could stay by you for the night." A blush shot to his skin, tinting it pink.

"And I stayed. In the middle of the night, a bear attacked. It had three jewel shards, and it went after you. I jumped in front, and I got its attack. Sango finished it off, I suppose."


"Oh InuYasha! I am so sorry, its all my fault. If I had not have been asleep-"
"Dont be. I am alright. Enough said."

"Yeah, but InuYasha..."

"Drop it. I said I am fine."

"At least let me look at your wounds."

"I said Im fine!" He pressed.

"I want to see that they were cared for right! You are seriously hurt and it can get worse!"

"Keh!" Was all he said in reply.

Kagome stood up and walked over to her yellow back pack. It was over stuffed and worn out, but it held so many memories. It was the holder of an assortment of things. Such as medication and bandaids to hair spray and math books. In each pocket and comprtment, a new thing could be discovered. Shippos coloring books and lolly pops to her soap and change of clothes. Kagome shuffed through the mess until she pulled out a first aid kit.

She walked back to the wounded Hanyou and layed out the items she would need. Gauze pad and tape, scissors and antibiotic. With each new product she retreved InuYasha flinched. This always hurt. How was it that the medication from her time was more "advanced" if it only hurt ten times worse?

Kagome began to remove the bandages that stretched across his chest. They were wrapped about in an "x" fashion, continueing over a couple of times before they went on to circle his rib cage and lower abs. Kagome took hold of her scissors and held up the gauze so one end of the razor could get underneath. She then began to make even, steady strokes of the scissors cuts until she had made her movements all the way down the wrapping. When the last place of the bandage, she made her final snip, and the two ends fell from one another as if they were once chained, and now free.

When Kagome saw the sight before her eyes, she almost became ill. The hanyou had a huge gash in the center of his stomach. It was greatly infested with bacteria and Kagome knew that the amount of proxcide that she was going to have to put on it was going to hurt. She wouldnt blame InuYasha if he yelped out in pain. She just hope she had remembered to bring asprin.

The raven hair girl took a cotten ball in hand and placed it over the opening of the proxcide bottle. She tipped the bottle from the bottem, so that it dabbed the cotten with its fluid. When she was satisfyed with the amount it had absorbed, she began to slowly swipe the wet, white ball on the infected wound. The host of the gash let out a harsh yell. Kagome sighed. This was going to take a while.

"Settle down InuYasha. It doesnt hurt that bad!"

"Yes it does! How would you know? That stuff idnt going into your gut!"

This was true. Kagome had never really had a large injury. Of course there were the scrapes and bruises. The most deadly incounter she had gotten into was with Kohaku when they all were unsure if he had escaped Narakus graps or not. But other than that, She had never been hurt so badly to the point where she was bleeding. InuYasha had always made sure of that. He protected her endlessly. And he always would. But did he do it because he felt he had to, or because he wanted to? That was the question, wasnt it. Does he want to save her, or is he obligated to?

"InuYasha..." She began, a little scared of what his reaction would be.

"What?" He said. It came out fast enough to sound angry, yet gental enough to show that he was not all that mad. He was strange like that. In the weakest of moments he could sound like he was ready to fight. And when he was angry, some how, she could always detect some small amount of leeway in him. Perhaps thats why she held on so strong and would never give up.

"Why did you... Why did you save me?"

"What? What Kind of question is that? I saved you because your life was indanger, and you couldnt move! I had to protect you!"

Kagome looked into his eyes, and her head drooped somewhat. When she looked clear into his, he knew that this was something that would not blow over easily.

"Did you have to, or did you want to?" She asked, her eyes now shadowed.

"Kagome I... I wanted to. I would never let anything happen to you. You know that..." He started to move toward her, but she beckonded him to lie still.

"If you move around too much, the wounds will reopen more than they already are." She looked down at the blood stained skin, of that which should be so porclin white.

"Im sorry." She finally mutted out, as she began to work on fixing him up once more.

"Sorry for what?" He asked nerviously.

"Its my fault that your hurt in the first place. If I wasnt so weak-"

"Kagome, its not your fault. The important thing is that you remembered!"

Each time he said those words, it was like it was dawning on him for the first time.

'Kagome remembers me. She remembers what we had... and what we didnt have....'

He looked off into the distance for a long while, while Kagome made quick work of putting the proper care on the gash. InuYasha sat stock still the whole time.

When Kagome had finished, she inspected her work. It was well done, and she had taken proper care of him. Yet why did she feel this closeness to him now that was not there before? Like some thing had changed, and she was unaware. She hated when that happened to her. Kagomes eyes darted down the silk skin of that of the victum. She felt as if some lit inside her. Kagome was unaware of herself standing, but she regained conciousness when she handed InuYasha his hoari. He had been started by her movement, as if lost in thought. Things seemed so different now. Things were happening so fast on the slowly spinning Earth.

InuYasha looked off into some distant part of the room that was clearly uninteresting to him. But he just couldnt look at Kagome and not want to tell her. Want to touch her, want to let all the words that his soul held so deeply inside of him slip free and be said and gone. But he could not. He was not ready to mutter such things, and Kagome by far was not ready for such a shock. Did she doubt his love? More than likely. Did she have reason to? More than to breath. He had betrayed her countless times, and only a handful of them she had found out. But some where deep inside, he knew that she was aware. She always knew.

And that hurt. It was never easy to hear that the one and only person he ached for had a distrust in him. He personally lived by the rule "never trust anyone until they give you reason to", where as Kagome seemed to go by "Trust every one until they give you reason not to." And if she had reason to distrust him, that meant he has done something wrong. It took a lot to woo such an element from her. What had he done, and how can he fix it?

He felt her rustle around a bit. She was uncomfortable, and he knew it. Tension was thick in the air for an unknown reason. It was almost touchable. He breathed in, and released his breath. In a short distance, he could hear Sango and the others. Her voice was hoarse and nervious.

"What if she does not remember Miroku? How long will this take? I cant stand to sit by and watch. I have to do some thing! There has to be some thing we can do!"

"Now, now. Lets not jump to conclusions. Lets just say she does not remember, we can send her back to her time and..."

The rest was faded out. InuYasha had heard enough. Send her back to her own time? That would have ment that he would never see her agian. Never feel her soft skin aginst his own in the cold winters night. Never agian to hear the murmors that she said in hr sleep that meant nothing, outside, but with in her, held the keys to a wonderland. What would he do if he could never hear her laugh agian? That fragile light chuckle that lit up her face, and lifted his heart. She was an angel. His angel.

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It was near sun set when Sango and the others came back. They came bareing fire wood and food from the village, and we eager to tell the tales of what had happened earlier that day. They were completely in awe when Kagome told them that she had remembered her lost thoughts. Sango seemed to squeel with joy and Shippo tryed his hardest not to cry. But even the bravest of soliders break down once and a while. He let the tears fall silently.

Supper went by uneventfully, at least in Kagomes opinion. Every one was throwing wild questions at her, and "remember when..."'s were constintly asked. But she went along with it all as if it was the most interesting topic that they could invent. And maybe at the moment it was, but her attention was some where else, as was her heart. She would every so often steal a look at the hanyou in back of her, rested aginst a corner.

InuYasha layed in a pile of straw and hay, content and asleep with a blue blanket out stretched over him. At least that is what every one thought. He was a hanyou, which made his half demon. Such creatures hardly ever lied dormaint like that for long. He was merely resting, while fully aware of his surrondings. And the thing was, Kagome knew this. She smiled at his trickery, but was not fooled. She would have to make sure he slept tonight. He needed the rest, and besides, when you dream, that is the time that your brain works out issues that are to hard to deal with while aware of the world. Dreams were some times a slumber land, and others they were a night mare.

Every one slipped into their spots on the floor. Sango was rested aginst Kirara. Miroku lied not far from them, but far enough where he was displeased. Kagome had layed down next to Shippo, and he seemed more pleased than he had in months. When true darkness fell, Kagome layed wide eyed awake. Slowly, she removed the flap of her sleeping bag, and steped out. She had only the fires light to guide her as she made her way to her back pack. Deep in the dark, a hanyous ears twitched. Kagome pulled out a bag of chips and a can of soda. She brought them over to InuYasha.

"InuYasha, look at me, I know your not asleep." She spoke freely.

"What?" He said as if he did not know she held food in her hands. He had not eaten a thing all day, and was dying to eat.

"Are you hungry? You have to eat." Kagome declaired.

"Yes!" He exclaimed.


"Here." She said sweetly as she knelt down next to him. He eyed her the whole time.

"Ka... Kagome..."

"Hmm?"

"Your okay, right? Nothings changed?"

"Somethings changed...." She began

"What? Is it bad?"

Kagome smiled.

"Im not sure. But I dont think its bad." She finished. Then she looked at him, and shot him a brilliant half smile.

"InuYasha? Can I ask you a question?"

"Hmm?" He asked, acting like he was tearing himself away from the food.

"Can I lay with you tonight? I think it may help me get back to normal." She asked with more confidence than she ever thought she owned.

He blushed on que.

"Sure. Do what you want." He spat out. Kagome smiled wider. His face spoke volumes.

When InuYasha had finished his midnight snack, Kagome moved it away so that it was not in the way. She moved herself up to the hay stack, careful to to hit the hanyou, and layed down. InuYasha inhailed deeply. She smelled so good. Like honey and vanilla combined. She had a scent so sweet that he could become lost in her. She was so perfect. So every thing. So Kagome. And she layed on her side, next to him. Her warmth aginst him made him shiver. He could tell that he breathing had slowed down, and when it did, he placed his arm, slowly, for it hurt to move, over her stomach. He melted in her touch. The hanyou closed his eyes and just as he did, he heard Kagome say in a low tone "Good night InuYasha."

He was stock still. He felt Kagome move her hand up to his, and rest it there lovingly.

And for the first time in months, InuYasha slept, a deep, sound sleep.