Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Featherbrite's Tale ❯ Chapter 5 ( Chapter 5 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]
"Ah, a long hot soak. One of the few redeeming things of civilization." -Garnn, barbarian

"Is Shampoo's turn to fire wave motion gun. Akane already have her turn." Shampoo, A Very Scary Bet.

Featherbrite's Tale, a Ranma 1/2 Alteredverse fic by Gregg Sharp with helpful bits by White Pheonix and Kender_Sci.

5: Arrested? No. Captured!
OR... Shampoo the Vampire Slayer

DISCLAIMER: Ranma 1/2 characters by R.Takahashi. Nathan Brazil by Jack Chalker. Flying Dutchman, Sidhe, UnSidhe, Oberon, Titania, Faerie Realms, vampires, hot baths, and Yngvi by various other people. Naoko Takeuchi by Mr and Mrs Takeuchi. Vanilla by G.Ikari because frankly she deserved a better ending. Artwork for various original characters can be found at www.mediaminer.org or at Larry F's excellent fanfic site "Library Of Florestica"

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Ranma sat back and enjoyed the simple luxury of a hot soak. Rinsing had put him in yousei form, which he hated for its alien appearance and attendent sex change. (Though he _would_ admit that the flight stuff and enhanced senses were cool. Well, maybe hated was too strong a word. Disliked.) The hot water had instantly restored both gender and species, and was welcome for other reasons.

For much of his life, bathing had been done in lakes or streams, or an old oil barrel at best. It was a simple pleasure, allowing one's aches and pains to slowly ebb, muscles to relax, and nerves to unfrazzle in the steaming hot water. This, an actual furo or soaking tub, was something that Ranma felt he could get used to.

He didn't have much respite tonight, though. He knew that at some time during the night there would be another attack by the vampire. Having tasted Akane's blood once, the vampire would return again to sample the same prey and increase his influence on her. If he did so three times, Akane would die and rise three nights later as a vampire herself.

At which point she'd be the slave of the vampire who created her and essentially be an addict constantly searching for her "fix" - blood. Preferably the blood of innocents. Some who walked that path could resist and satisfy themselves with animal blood and the occasional quick bite of human blood but not take so much that they would kill the donor.

There were further preparations still to be made to greet the vampire. Now, however, Ranma could spend a few moments in quiet appreciation of a long hot soak.

The moment was broken as the door slid open.

"OH my!" Kasumi blushed and covered herself with a towel. Oddly enough she didn't look away.

"Shampoo agree with friend Kasumi." Shampoo covered her eyes, the effect being somewhat spoiled by her spreading her fingers a moment later.

"Mine!" Nabiki's reaction was so intense it was almost violent. This brought a stare from Kasumi and Shampoo.

Ranma lowered himself further into the water and wondered if he could possibly learn invisibility. Featherbrite seemed to think he could do it.

Featherbrite, having flipped the "Occupied" sign earlier, thought it was only fair for the Candidates to get a good look at what faerie magic, good genes, and a good diet while growing up could do.(1)

"A man among men, indeed," snickered the faerie. With a rather lighter heart, Featherbrite turned her attention to her own preparations for the upcoming battle.

Shampoo and two others watched as Ranma pulled a towel out of nowhere and vacated the tub.

Kasumi thought that it was impolite to stare, but somehow just couldn't bring herself to look away. She put it down to concern about him slipping and falling on the way out, yes that was it.

"Why big sister Kasumi shred towel like that?"

"Oh my?"

--------

"Here's where we part company," said Vanilla, the wind whipping her hair in what would be a fairly dramatic visual if she actually cared about such things. She stood on the precipice of a roof, looking out into the sunset.

"I didn't know you read Japanese," replied Bane, also not caring about dramatic moments as she was eating a granola bar at the moment.

"I didn't. I'm learning though, and some kanji is the same in either language." Vanilla pointed to the North. "That way lies their 'tenth district' and the eventual goal."

"How do you know for sure that Shampoo and her airen aren't in Juuban?" asked Dina.

"I know. Scent wrong." Tigar snorted. "Though I swear this place is as bad as some swamps I've gone through. Yecchh. How can they breathe this junk every day?"

"Scent wrong? What do you mean scent wrong?" Dina railed against the stupid little singer.

"I mean the wind's mainly blowing from the West. Shampoo uses that shampoo that Bai Ying makes specially for her. It has a distinctive combination of smells. There was a brief scent of that earlier. From the West." Tigar yawned. "Worse her airen puts out some distinctive smells of his own. I got a good whiff of him at the tournament. Definitely West. So the two are together and that way."

"Yeah, right," Dina was openly skeptical.

Tigar shrugged. She didn't care if Dina believed her or not. She'd already switched Dina's "Spirit Catcher Jar" for a pickle jar she'd picked up on that ship. The Nichieju rocker just wanted to spend some time having fun, who the heck needed this crap?

--------

China:

Cologne smoked her pipe and looked out over the destruction. She could admit she'd fallen into the same trap as some of the others. The first few opponents had been weak. Normal weapons had hurt them and ki attacks could finish them off.

Looking at the trail of rubble that marked the path of the latest attacker, Cologne didn't need to tell anyone that THAT had been a General.

Going back to one of the manga that had been left behind by Bane, it was easy to see now. There were the weak little energy gatherers, there were the more powerful soldiers represented by those butterfly girls, then there were the Generals.

The skeletal knight had slashed and hacked and burned. Torrents of red flame or crimson lightning had come from the twin swords that he brandished. Amazons had been injured, but due to their numeric advantage and ability to provide covering fire - no lives had been lost.

The youma general had batted aside ki blasts as if they were nothing. The hiryu shoten ha, the bakusai tenketsu, the amaguri-ken, the splitting cat's hair - as soon as they used a manuever it had been sundered by the juggernaut in their midst. Then upon reaching the center of the village, it had stopped.

"I thought there were some worthy opponents here. I was wrong. I thought that Ranma Saotome might have left something here, or counted you as his allies. I was wrong. You are too weak. Too pathetic. Not one of you can stand against us when our armies raze your world to a lifeless cinder. Just a bunch of silly girls playing at being fighters. Pfeh. You are nothing we need to concern ourselves with."

The Amazons of Nichieju had heard this speech. Given all the while it was batting arrows out of the air.

The attitude of the Amazons was that they had fought and fought hard, and this particular youma had barely noticed. Another group might have slunk off in defeat.

Cologne watched the barricades and new defensive fortifications being built. Siege weapons from out of ancient European texts were being fashioned. Tactics discussed. Traps designed.

And lots of Amazons trying to get the rest of the manga series to look for weak points.

Being defeated was one thing. Being defeated by a genderless being another. Having the genderless being stand around insulting them was cause for war!

----------------

Gammon snarled. Difficult when you don't have any flesh, but he managed it somehow.

Yngvi decided the skeletal knight was *not* calming down and maybe he should do something about it.

"They weren't even taking the fight seriously!"

Yngvi blinked, all eight eyes. "They didn't take *you* seriously, Your Awfulness?"

"NO!" The skeletal knight was sufficiently peeved that he had red lightning flaring from the corners of his eye sockets. "Half of them were reading some sort of picture books even whilst I brought their stupid village down around their heads! I crushed their outer walls and they were using pathetic *chi* attacks. Even after I used my sword to ground out chi effects they wouldn't bring out their big guns."

Yngvi blinked again, scratching idly with a hindleg at a speck of dust on one of his rearmost eyes. Chi was kind of like earth magic wasn't it? "Uhm. That doesn't seem right."

Gammon's reply was short, brutal, and venomous. Yngvi, however, was a louse and therefore good at dodging such things.

Yngvi tried the most simple explanation, since even faerie used Occam's razor. They just called it something else. "Could it have been some sort of books on magic, or perhaps treatises on strategy?"

Gammon calmed slightly. "Perhaps. They scuttled away nearly with your own skill, skulker. If that had been the case I made threats and insulted them to draw out what potent magics they might have to better gauge them. I had a Contingency Teleport prepared. Instead they just cowered in their holes. They are not worthy of consideration of further action."

"Perhaps if their books were stolen," suggested Yngvi.

Gammon chortled. "Oh yes, that would do nicely, I think. See to it Yngvi!"

"ME?!" Yngvi yelped. "What about a shadow creature or a lurking horror or something more appropriate to a mission of this caliber?"

"You may be right, a shadow creature would be more capable." Gammon considered it. Yngvi had his amusement value, those warrior women might actually be able to hurt him. Which wouldn't get him those books. Besides, if those women were that interested in them, just stealing those things would annoy them. "Find one, I shall show it the image of these books. We shall see if that bestirs these warriors to show their hidden skills."

----

A few hours later, Ranma-yousei was sleeping. The poor boy had been exhausted by some ritual he'd prepared that (he hoped) would weaken the vampire and keep him from shifting forms while inside the house.

Nabiki was glad that the sylph didn't snore at least. She, however, wasn't able to sleep just yet. Having a boy (even if he was a she at the time) sleeping THAT close was... distracting.

Maybe it had been the earlier scene in the furo. Maybe it was just she wasn't used to having a nightlight.

Ranma's faerie form put out a slight glow. It was only noticeable during periods of great stress, or like now where there was no other source of light. A slight sparkly glimmering that shifted continually in hue and brightness- reflecting Ranma's emotional state.

"This has GOT to go," Nabiki muttered at the ceiling. Pink and purple flickering answered her quiet comment. "Great. Just great." More multicolored flickering shifted with each syllable. Nabiki was vaguely reminded of that foreign movie "Close Encounters" by the odd color shifts.

A little smile crossed Nabiki's face. Annoying, but also amusing in a way. "I really value my privacy, Saotome. Just wanted you to know, I'm REALLY beginning to resent your presence." The colors flickered to a more dark blue. "You also smell, you know that? Sort of a baked cinnamon. Men are _not_ supposed to smell like baked goods. I'd noticed that earlier. I can tell what mood you're in by the scent." The colors had faded down to violet.

"Well, maybe I'm not resenting your presence *that* much." Nabiki watched colors flicker and tried to relax for a moment. "Though that cinnamon smell is making me hungry. I just wish I knew what to do about you. You act so damn nice one minute, then you do something just totally weird the next."

"Nabiki?"

Nabiki turned her head slightly to look at the figure standing on the edge of her bed. "How come I can see you?"

"You're in the state between awake and asleep, the twilight between reality and dream. You're open to a lot of things you wouldn't be normally." Featherbrite walked up to the girl's shoulder and sat down.

"I don't get it, but okay." Nabiki filed the information away for later retrieval. "What's the deal with cold iron, anyway? The old stories conflict about the effects and don't go into why."

"I'm not sure. The faerie way is to accept things, not to do as you humans do and concern yourselves with the why." Featherbrite sighed. "I think it's like this tamed lightning that you humans have come to use."

"Electricity?" Nabiki yawned as she started thinking about this. Grounding effect? Magnetic fields? "Can you turn off the nightlight effect at least?"

"Oh, Ranma's glow? He won't have it in his uncursed form." Featherbrite looked into the young girl's eyes. Practiced eyes took in the details of the mortal girl's aura and came to conclusions. "Do you want to sleep? I can help you there."

"Of course I want to sleep. I've got school tomorr..." Nabiki's eyes abruptly closed and she slept.

Featherbrite smiled and walked up to the girl's head. "Sweet dreams," the faerie said. It was a promise.(2)

Nabiki's lips curled up in a little smile as she dreamed.

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Shadows darkened and moved.

It was a shadow creature. Not an undead, but a Fae. An UnSidhe that came from the border with Makai.

Shadowy talons reached forward and developed the consistency of water. Books began disappearing into that darkness.

These women were warriors who were looking for a solid physical menace. Half their nation could have been slaughtered by the time that an alarm would have been raised. Half that remainder gone before they figured out a defense.

That was not the mission, however. Nor was it the normal inclination of the shadow.

Even though it was an UnSidhe, it was not in the nature of shadow to kill by itself. Conceal, yes. Frighten, yes. Work with others who were more predatory - definitely.

The reason that mortals feared the dark is because there was nasty stuff in it often enough that fearing it became a survival trait.

Books vanished if they met the definitions that had been described. The shadow creature didn't care, it just wanted to get back to lurking.

The beast took the books to the location indicated and dumped its heavy burden. Then stuck a tendril back to its original task. Lurking and watching for signs of some sylph.

It noticed the appearance of something else, but it was not the sylph and so wasn't of interest at present.

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All of those attuned to the magic awoke when the first set of wards were brushed aside.

Featherbrite settled onto Ranma's shoulder and lightly touched his mind, adding her own sensory input. That sometime during the night he had shifted back to male form was noted, and he sensed that the little faerie had had something to do with it.

As Featherbrite's perceptions added to his own, the darkened room seemed to suddenly come into color. A pale yellowy glow surrounded the softly murmurring Nabiki, and the various tertiary wards had a fitful white flickering around them.

Ranma snuck towards Akane's room, where the attack would begin, stopping only long enough to open Kasumi's door.

Shampoo and Kasumi were already awake, Kasumi in her plain cotton nightgown and Shampoo wearing something more practical for a fight.

Sounds of a window being opened reached Ranma. "Now."

Ranma opened the door, interrupting an attempt to give the entranced Akane a hickey that would do more than break the skin. His opening remark was a flying front kick.

Akane dropped as the vampire turned his attention to the newest victim. The shock was enough to bring her to full wakefulness. Her reaction to seeing a slavering, fanged, middle-aged European businessman fighting Ranma in her room at midnight was about what one would expect.

Her scream got everyone up but Nabiki.

Nabiki merely put her head under her pillow and mumbled something about ice cubes and ostrich feathers. Ranma's name came up a couple of times.(3)

"Oh...my..." Kasumi managed to say, holding her cross to bar passage into the rest of the house. Watching over Shampoo's shoulder the scene of Ranma fighting a vampire in Akane's room, she couldn't believe she'd ever thought that younger men were boring.

Shampoo stood guard in front of Kasumi. She knew the plan. She also knew that no plan ever survived contact with the enemy.

"What's going on..." Genma saw the vampire, remembered Akane throwing him down the stairs the previous night, and decided to leave this fight to the boy. About time Ranma stood on his own two feet anyway.

Soun saw one of his daughters being menaced by a vampire and started to squeeze past Kasumi. He would not allow this to continue. Of course, he knocked aside the cross she was holding, breaking the barrier to the rest of the house. Thereby proving Shampoo's point about battles not allowing a plan to survive.

Featherbrite took the opportunity afforded her by Ranma's battle and sat on Akane's head. Magic flowed like a stream from the faerie to the young girl.

Vladimir was unused to this level of interference, but wasn't letting any of the cattle get in the way of his plans. Unfortunately, the martial artist didn't seem inclined to stand still and let the vampire get to business. "Slave, attack." Let the girl take some of the heat off of him.

Akane watched but didn't hear the command. Featherbrite had turned off the sound. Akane saw everything going on, but couldn't move even if she could hear the command.

A vicious backhand with a vampire's supernatural strength managed to throw Soun Tendo the length of the room, his demon head attack just beginning to form. He slumped and went still.

Vladimir finally managed to grasp the young man whose harmless blows had proved such a distraction. One hand was enough to hold this worthless creature up and would be enough to crush his neck in front of his family. Then Vladimir could find the faerie and gain the power needed to avenge himself against Dmitri.

"Shampoo want to know if she can cut in?" Shampoo ducked under another swing from the vampire, to come up behind him. She moved.

Vladimir looked down at his chest noting that there appeared to be a wooden practice sword sticking out of it.

"Technically, Shampoo, that doesn't qualify as a 'cut' at all. More of a thrust." Kasumi smiled at her friend. It was so nice that she was getting the chance to vent some of her violent impulses.

"Oh," Shampoo stepped back and regarded the impaled vampire. "Shampoo think maybe big sister Kasumi is right. Think vampire get point anyway. Just moment please."

Ranma thumped to the ground, feeling that his neck had taken WAY too much abuse today. Even with the healing he'd been able to do by tying into the ki flows.

"Kasumi please to look other way briefly?" Shampoo smiled at her "big sister" who was almost like the mother she'd never had. Such a nice girl.

Vladimir dropped to his knees, trying to push the wooden sword out of his chest. He was too close, he couldn't be stopped NOW. He wasn't some lame beginning vampire who could be instantly made inert this way, he could still win!

A Chinese sword made a whispering noise as it cut through the air. "Shampoo have to thank Razor. He very good weaponsmith, put good edge on sword. Even if he a very weird male, he know his business." A thump punctuated her statement.

"Shampoo. Why?" Kasumi blinked, puzzled over her friend's actions but grateful there was no blood to mess up the floor.

Shampoo began cleaning her sword and smiled at her big sister's confusion. "Ah, Kasumi not know? Shampoo know how deal with vampires. First have to use stake or wood through heart. Then have to cut off vampire head. Then leave head and body out for sun. When turn to ash must use running water to flush ashes or throw in sea. Then, very important, must celebrate three nights later to honor ancestors and spirits who help bring victory."

"Oh, a party?" Kasumi nodded to indicate she understood. She'd have to go shopping.

"You...saved me." Akane looked at the Amazon with a completely different viewpoint. "He...he would have..."

Shampoo nodded and smiled. After all, she had just proven that she was a thoroughly kick-butt Amazon warrior who had the tools and the talent. She was feeling every inch the champion. Hah, let the rest of her village know that Shampoo was now entitled to have the title Vampire Slayer. Shampoo the Vampire Slayer, she rather liked the sound of that.

"And I thought you were just a stupid violent bimbo," Akane murmurred. Judging from her broken Japanese and bouncy breasts mainly.

Shampoo frowned and took out her Japanese-Chinese dictionary. "Just when Shampoo think she getting hang of language..."

"It's not important, Shampoo," Kasumi quickly covered. Akane was just feeling a bit free with her tongue after having just escaped being a vampiric slave. No reason to spoil the moment. "Come on, Featherbrite can put wards around the head and body."

"You are NOT leaving that in my room, are you?" Akane swallowed hard, turning a pleading gaze from one person to the next. She was supposed to trust her safety to Ranma's imaginary friend? "C'mon. Kasumi? Shampoo? Please? Can't I sleep with one of you guys tonight? Ranma?"

Downstairs, Genma was draining his third bottle. He had *not* seen what he'd thought he'd seen. It had to have been a hallucination, so there was nothing to get worked up about. Ranma could *not* have been fighting some snarling fanged guy with glowing red eyes in Akane's bedroom. Absolutely not.

Lots of sake helped. Years of denial gave him a lot of practice. Hard enough to accept a Chinese curse that turned him into a panda and his son into a winged daughter. Vampires could *not* really exist, just myth and superstition.

Had Ranma been making advances on Akane? Yeah, that was it, and she'd been fighting him off. If this thing with Nabiki didn't go off as planned, they could try for a few illegitimate children on the side. The lines would still be joined and the mother wouldn't mind shoving an embarrassment off on a long training journey.

Genma would have found Soun and explained the sake-granted insight, except that the sake was finally having the intended effect. He would wake up in the morning with a rather severe hangover and only fuzzy recollections of the night.

Besides, Soun Tendo was still unconscious himself, though Shampoo and Kasumi had carried him off to his own bed where he'd be more comfortable. At least more comfortable there than imbedded in the wall he'd impacted.

In her room, Nabiki was smiling and mumbling something about whipped cream and strawberries.

Ranma glanced over at Nabiki as he prepared for bed. He hadn't known that she liked strawberries. Maybe he ought to pick her up some as a peacekeeping gesture, after all she couldn't be happy about these living arrangements.

Shampoo stared at the ceiling on her futon, listening to Akane on HER futon. Kasumi kept her bed. Life in Japan was so different from the village. A warrior's life was hard, because an Amazon had to be tough and ready to fight for everything. Her eyes caught the frills and lace around her friend's bed. If she dressed more like Nabiki or Kasumi would Ranma pay more
attention to her?

Featherbrite checked on Nabiki, and wondered at some of the strangeness the girl was dreaming of. Well, the ostrich feathers weren't THAT bizarre, she'd heard of that back in that Sultan's harem. After a moment's deliberation, she decided that she ought to see if Kasumi or Shampoo had the same sort of reaction. Maybe it was some Japanese thing...

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(1) Featherbrite has been listening to washerwomen, harem girls, and other gossips for centuries. Does she want her friend to suffer from these complained about lacks or being substandard? No! She therefore used magic to correct these perceived inefficiencies/problems during Ranma's development. If you need more details and still do not understand, you are too young for that information. This note is because some people still don't get it.

(2) This is just Featherbrite using magic that causes her to fall asleep and ensures pleasant dreams. Everything else is supplied by Nabiki.

As to the morality of Featherbrite engaging even in such minor mind control, her morality is of an alien nature. She doesn't "get" humans, even with her years of experience.

(3) Don't ask. See also note #2 above.


Gammon puzzled. Why had those warrior women been interested in *this* crap?

Flipping forward, he checked the section that the translation spells flagged as an address. "Kokul."

A large form of scythe blades and wings scuttled forward.

"Kokul, go here. Find this writer." Gammon thought aloud. "The author must have some connection to these warriors. Perhaps she is one of their number who is abroad. Find her. Bring me her head. Not the rest of the body, the head will do. I can bespell it later in order to ask questions of it. Now go."

Kokul folded his twelve legs under him and rose on his jeweled wings. The chance for mayhem and slaughter on the Mortal Plane had been given him, and he would not let it pass.

Gammon continued to consider. Magical maids fighting evil menaces from beyond? Perhaps it was some sort of code, or prophesies, or...

------------

Nerima:

Nabiki woke up, stretched, and realized she felt GOOD. Fully awake, fully energized, and ready to take on the world (or at least Furinkan.) Also somewhat ravenous and not entirely sure WHAT had happened last night.

There was a sleeping Ranma over there, in male form. From the look of things, he'd been in a fight last night.

"Oh no, Akane!" Nabiki hurried to her youngest sister's room. Akane wasn't there, but there *was* Shampoo sweeping up what appeared to be some sort of black dust.

Shampoo spotted the pajama clad girl and wiped the scowl from her face. "Nihao, Na-bi-ki. Shampoo just cleaning up here. You have good sleep with airen?"

Certain details of certain dreams came back to Nabiki. She blushed. "Y-yes. We...I slept fine."

There was a snapping noise and Shampoo noted that the broomstick she had been holding had somehow broken. "Oops. Shampoo not know how that happen."(1)

Nabiki nodded absently and left the Amazon to the cleanup, wondering briefly at the intensity of the dreams she had experienced the previous night. She also completely missed the look Shampoo shot at her.

Ranma passed her on the stairs as he headed for the kitchen. The sound of Kasumi happily humming was briefly interrupted by Ranma's request for food.

Nabiki glanced into Kasumi's room and noted that Akane was sprawled out over a futon and snoring. She wouldn't admit how relieved that made her feel.

Genma's room had the odor of liquor emanating from it, as well as the annoying smell of damp panda.

Nabiki shook her head. She'd get the details later. Right now she had to get ready for school, and it looked like getting a ride from Ranma would be out of the question for today.

----------------

Hikaru Gosunkugi was torn. He could collect a few hair samples, maybe a piece of wing, and he was sure he could use the faerie magic to make Akane love him. He knew that they would then be happy together. Well, maybe.(2)

Instead, there was a problem. It was easy to overhear conversations when almost everyone ignored your existence. Such as the conversation between Hisakawa-sensei and certain others.

He could warn Ranma, and try to get the boy to change to his yousei form so that he could get those ingredients as repayment. Alternatively, Gosunkugi could see himself just waiting for the rescue attempt and then capturing the pixie.

He could see the faerie, and he knew what that meant. He, Hikaru Gosunkugi, had magic in his blood. That he finally had some confirmation of what he had always felt to be the case had done wonders for his self-esteem.

Now if he could just figure out what to do.

-----------

Mister Osa got up to lower the blinds so they could begin work. "P&Q Angels" was not doing nearly as well as hoped.

The sounds of shattering glass and insane chittering brought the rest of the staff. Upon looking in, they noticed their manager hiding under a desk, and that there was something with a vague resemblence to a twelve limbed, nine foot long, Japanese beetle trying to scuttle into the opening that used to have a window in it.

"Mortal kine, your flesh - I'll dine," said Kokul. "But first, I thirst. Takeuchi Naoko my target will be, while I deal with her, some may yet flee."

They were Japanese. Stoic in the face of personal hardship. Strong of character. Faced with personal painful death, they remained resolute.

Roughly a quarter of them pointed at one woman. Those that didn't were already running.

"EEEEEK!" That woman was having some problems getting to that professional level of detachment. "I'm just a manga artist!"

Two sets of serrated mandibles opened, leaking greenish fluid to spatter the floor.

"NOT SO FAST!"

The remaining office workers, a manager, and a manga artist all looked towards this new proclamation.

For Naoko, this was particularly familiar. She had penned enough scenes just like this for the deja vu to be darn near palpable.

A girl stepped out of the shadows, wearing a Chinese banner dress but having exchanged her Shampoo-esque hairstyle for two ridiculous odango balls and ponytails because she felt that meeting this author with such a hairstyle would help put her at ease.

Instead, all of the humans took two steps back because there was a short blonde girl with wide blue eyes in a Chinese banner dress and a hairstyle straight out of "Sailor Moon" there. With a spear that was longer than she was tall and had what looked like very sharp edges.

Also a somewhat pudgy girl with a crossbow. An extremely cute girl with a sword. And a sexy Hindu girl with a bo staff.

The girl pointed at the obviously-a-youma (with her spear, she *was* an Amazon after all) and knew what her lines had to be. She had read everything that she had been able to mail order, after all. "You who seek evil in a place where art is practiced, you cannot be forgiven! I am Bane of the Nichieju, and you will be punished!" Unfortunately her accent was so thick that most of those present only got parts of it.

Kokul's mandibles clashed. Because of the translation spell (it really wouldn't do to show up and make demands and threats if your targets were incapable of understanding your language), his comments *were* comprehensible to both the Japanese and the Chinese. "I am here for the one known as Takeuchi. Die with her or flee."

Some of the remaining Japanese realized this was their cue.

Dina rolled to the side, expecting an attack, her crossbow sang and she reached for her other weapon - a long strip of cloth.

The crossbow bolt vanished in a spray of slivers from the UnSidhe's back. Spice stepped forward in a practiced manuever, her staff moving in a noisy blur to deflect the projectiles.

Sugar and Bane stepped to the sides, each ready to step in with their own attacks.

Spice used the second half of her manuever. Mousse was the Master Of Hidden Weapons - whereby he could hide a profusion of weapons on his body or under his robes. Spice was the practitioner of Trick Weapons. Everything she had on her person, from her comb to her panties, held a concealed weapon or special trick she could use in a fight. She grounded her staff and triggered the charge that released a jet of flame (one shot stream of lighter fluid) towards the "youma".

Kokul wasn't too concerned with the weapons. It resembled superficially a giant flea and had a thick carapace. Fire, on the other hand, could cause some serious pain. It flinched, momentarily forgetting that it was still in the window. When beginning to slide backwards, it naturally lunged forward.

"Badger Slash!" Sugar struck, the air pressure from her sword enough to slice carpeting as the main force slashed through thickly armored limbs. Partly though this was because she slashed at joints. Hey, she might be cute and perky, but she *did* know something about swordwork.

Another limb was slashed through by Dina's use of the Iron Cloth manuever.

Spear slashed in through opened mandibles into more tender flesh. The giant twelve (nine now) limbed flea fell out the window.

"Consider yourself punished," called Bane out after the flea. She turned and posed. She knew this line too. Tigar often tried to get American movies and she'd seen one with a good line for cases like this. "We came, we saw, we kicked its ass!"

"Everybody left while we fought the monster," observed Dina. "Are we done now? Can we go get a hamburger or something, or do they have those in this goddess-forsaken place?"

-------------

"Cologne, Lilac! Our picture books are missing! One of the trackers say they saw a shadowy creature stealing them at night!"

"That first 'youma' did threaten to take those books away during his attack," pointed out Lilac as she handed a fresh cup of tea to her Matriarch.

"Hmm, they must be more important than we thought. I can't think of a reason to deny them to us if we couldn't gain some knowledge from them of how to beat these monsters. Send a party to Hong kong! Find a distributor!" Cologne's eyes narrowed. If only there were some allies they could pull in, but the only one she could think of that wasn't just a legend was Phoenix Mountain. The Herbal Village had joined them after they were attacked by one of those tentacle monsters already but things were beginning to get threatening at this rate. "Azure! Contact the Jusenkyo Guide. Make sure he and his daughter are all right. See if he knows of anyone we can contact for reinforcements."

"Okey dokey!" (Trip! THUD!)

Cologne winced. No, Azure was not the one to send to Jusenkyo. "Azure. Instead of going yourself, just see if Hibiscus is free and can come see us as soon as possible, hmmm?"

------------

"Fooey," Bane said. "I was hoping to at least talk to her."

"Well, we've *got* to talk to her, just to see what she knows." Sugar opened the door to the stairs. The entire idea of a metal box where you were completely unable to see things around you, while being moved up and down, especially while you were fighting Things From Another World had struck the Juuban Team as being yet another idiotic contrivance the big city people saddled themselves with.

Spice was always one to look for hidden angles. "The youma was looking for her. Therefore there *is* a connection here."

"Hmmm. Big Flea didn't die," pointed out Bane. "See, there's the impact crater. Looks like another leg left behind but there's not a big splat area."

"That means he's got eight left," pointed out Spice.

"That one youma turned to dust, maybe this one did," Dina said hopefully. "OOOOOH! Look! There's hope for this mission yet!"

The other three Amazons looked out the window, trying to spot what Dina had seen.

"See there! They got hamburgers!"

"Oh. 'Ma cu ra do ru no shi'," read Spice. "Never heard of it. Looks kinda like a McDonalds."

"You suppose they've got Coca-cola?" Sugar asked. "I haven't had any since I was eight."

"Probably changed the flavor. Damn Japanese," Dina grumbled.

--------

"Shampoo is taking the ashes to the harbor to dispose of them." Kasumi smiled at her sister. "Ranma's out training. Nabiki wanted to get to school early today. Father and Mister Saotome are both still asleep today."

Akane nodded. She'd wanted to thank Shampoo. She found herself with an entirely new appreciation for the Amazon. The bouncy girl with the kawaii voice that spoke in pidgin had proven herself a capable warrior. The two times she had made an attack it had been with grace and strength. The bokken had been thrust at a precise angle so that it had missed Ranma yet had
gone straight through the heart of the vampire.

Each blow had been precise, with no wasted movements. Akane had reviewed the scene several times in her mind and had come to one inescapable conclusion. Shampoo would be a MUCH better friend than an enemy.

Ranma hadn't been bad either. He'd risked his life to distract the vampire so that Shampoo could strike the killing blow. Certainly, even with his fast healing, being hauled up by the neck like that HAD to have hurt. Even though it *was* his fault for drawing the vampire in the first place.

Akane brightened. She could show her appreciation for both of them by making them cookies! From overhearing Shampoo talking to Kasumi, Akane knew that her home village was a little on the primitive side. She'd probably never had homemade cookies before. As for Ranma, being dragged all over Japan and China, he probably hadn't had them very often himself.

Akane smiled. Just as soon as she got home from school, she'd be sure to whip up a couple of batches of cookies.

---------

Shampoo glided over the ocean, briefly wishing that she'd gotten a *flying* ability. Ah well, what she *had* gotten was quite nice.

She couldn't wait to see her Grandmother's face. Shampoo giggled as she spread the ashes, then looped back.

She was an Amazon Princess after all. All Princesses had to have grace. She'd been told it was in the rules somewhere.

Yes, things were looking up for Shampoo. She had to admit it.

Okay, her fiance was a little weird and she *still* hadn't been able to give the Kiss Of Marriage. Something always seemed to pop up, and right now there were other considerations.

Still, being able to glide on wind currents? Having this nifty little powerup? A friend like Kasumi? The chance to kill a vampire without even resorting to this form?

Shampoo landed on the pier, ignoring the way the workers stared at her. Let them. In fact, Shampoo decided to give them something to really talk about.

She flipped the container that had held the ashes up into the air and summoned her faerie-granted power. "COLD RINSE!"

The blast of icy water so like the mountain streams of home tossed the little box up and back into the waters where it quickly sank from view. Shampoo continued to grin as she left for her new home away from home.

She'd transform back, but a little extra gliding seemed the perfect way to get the morning going, didn't it?

-----------------

"So why not just run a quick Snatch job," the thug said as he straightened his jacket. "Just go in real quick, beat the snot outta the girl, then throw her in the back of a van and off we go. Happens alla time." He spoke from experience, having done this several times in the past year himself.

Isao sighed. He chose to let one of his other associates talk to the Talent.

"Because, my strong but slow friend," Yotsuya spoke in his usual smarmy tone. "The girl in question is actually a boy martial artist of considerable speed and talent with a shapeshifting curse."

Unari considered that, at least as well as he was able. "I thought she was some kinda fairy..."

"The girl indeed has both human and faerie characteristics," Yotsuya agreed. "While your own skills make you invaluable to our grandfather in the Yakuza, the girl has...other qualities our associate wishes to study."

Unari nodded. He still didn't understand why they didn't just run a Snatch but understood that they had a reason for doing it another way.

Yotsuya watched the big man go off to join the other low-level thugs. "I'm ashamed to actually have kinship with such clods."

"You know what they say," Isao remarked. He raised the binoculars to watch the house. "You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your... family."

Yotsuya shrugged. That was certainly something the oyabun might agree with.

Isao grinned. That had given him an idea. "Leave one man behind to monitor, we've got a couple of errands to run, boys."

----

Kasumi blinked as they came up to an unremarkable area in between two old trees. She couldn't see why this place was special.

"Pardon me, but are you sure about this? Why here?" Nabiki felt very uncomfortable. Her big sister was focussing in on an apparently empty space. Shampoo had shown up wearing a *seifuku* and apparently able to glide on the winds. Now they were out in the middle of Ichi-koo Park (which had been a construction supply company last week.)

Shampoo looked around. "This area feel different but Shampoo not sure what mean."

Featherbrite flicked from one of the girls to the next, then began the tricky part.

Nabiki drew in a startled breath as sparkling motes of light shot around all three of them, a technicolor comet whose tail grew longer as it continued to move.

A circle, Nabiki realized, the tail of the "comet" would lengthen to the point where the head would catch it in a few seconds.

Shampoo nodded, knowing now what was to come.

Kasumi merely waited patiently. How nice. A faerie ring.

The comet became a circle then faded. The wind whipped through the empty area in Ichi-koo Park.

--------

"(You shall not bar my way!)" Shammi drew her nunchaku featherdusters. "(How dare you (a mere male)
interfere with the mission of a member of the Nichieju!)"

"Huh? Hey, speak Japanese!" The boy glared at the oddly dressed woman. "Better yet, leave me alone, I'm on a Quest For Vengeance."

"You tell him, Shammi!" Tigar called out in Japanese, then realized that Shammi hadn't really been involved in Bane's language drills. Really, it was so rude to go to another country and not learn at least some of the native's language. "(Don't accept him talking back to you like that!)"

Swinging her nunchaku in a complicated pattern, Shammi snarled. So he _was_ talking back to her. She'd show him! She'd show all of them! She was just as good a fighter as Shampoo.

"(We don't have time for this, Shampoo is getting away!)" Vanilla pointed out. Then shrugged. She'd simply leave them to their diversion and go off to investigate things herself.

"Look, whoever you are, I don't fight girls. So just go away nicely, will you?" Ryouga tried not to show how miffed he was at having some girl slam into him with enough force to bowl him over.

"(Hey, he just said that he didn't consider you a worthy opponent?!)" Tigar wasn't completely sure, the boy had spoken too quickly, but that was what it had sounded like...

Shammi began to glow a fitful blue. "(You... YOU...YOU DARE!!!)" This was hitting her right where it hurt. She knew others considered her skills to be less than stellar, and it rankled. "DIE!"

Ryouga took a step back. "Uh oh."
========================================

(1) Anyone believe this? Nah, I didn't think so.

(2) Gosunkugi is mean, petty, spiteful, cowardly, and has no sense of honor. His preferred method of attack involves the victim being unaware of his presence or incapacitated. That does not mean he can't be salvaged, just that it would require some work.

----------

Nabiki stared at the glowing winged shape of Featherbrite who was laughing as she sat on Kasumi's shoulder and pointed out a trail off to the side.

"So..." Nabiki managed as she looked around. "Where exactly are we? And how come we can see you now?" Nabiki noted that Kasumi was her usual unflappable self, while she had her "Ice Queen" persona on. Shampoo, on the other hand, looked like she had gone into defensive mode and was hanging nearer the eldest Tendo. Interesting.

"This is the Faerie Realm, Nabiki, even if it IS one of the outlying regions. Naturally you can see me here, as that you can't in your mortal realm because of the restrictions laid upon faerie interaction with that world." Featherbrite shrugged. She didn't know much beyond that, it simply WAS, and faerie generally didn't question such things. That which was, was, that was the faerie view.

Shampoo tore her eyes away from the little figure to take in some of the odd sights around her. A grassy plain, with a number of trees. A four winged bird hovered briefly far above before proving it was a predator by making a dive at something off in the grass to her right. "Shampoo remember here vaguely. Not here long. Was many others with Shampoo. Is very dangerous."

Nabiki noted that the plants weren't varieties she was familiar with. She started collecting samples as surreptiously as she could, sure that the Botany Club would pay through the nose for these.

"A friend of mine is not too far off," Featherbrite answered. "We're getting supplies for the celebration of your victory over the vampire."

"Free?" Nabiki asked hopefully. She wasn't sure she wanted to know what kind of currency was used here. Maybe a free lunch was too much to hope for.

----------

Shammi charged and brought her nunchaku into a sweeping double strike that should have caught the boy on both sides of the head.

Ryouga blocked both. "HEY! Knock it off!"

Tiger flipped through her translation book. "Knock? (Ah, to strike a light blow! He's threatening to fight you!)"

"(Tell him that he's already fighting me!)" Shammi whipped the nunchaku back and produced a broom out of nowhere.

Ryouga almost laughed until Shammi started using bo staff manuevers with it. "HEY!"

"He is tougher than he appears," Vanilla raised an eyebrow without any other outward show of emotion. She had returned after determining there was no way to follow Shampoo. Interesting that Shampoo had made friends with the locals, perhaps she ought to explore this tactic herself.

"Oh, to heck with it." Ryouga lashed out, grabbing the broom and flinging it off to the side. "Now what are you going to do...uh oh."

Shammi pulled out a set of Ginsu knives. "(Very well, male, you have earned enough of my respect that now I shall use my ultimate attack, the Sashimi Sendoff! Pray to your ancestors that you...)"

At that moment the broom returned at high speed, having been accidently flipped in a manner that he had been practicing with his umbrella. Eventually he might be able to throw his umbrella and have it return to his hand should he miss. He still tended to be a little off on the return. That it worked with a broom was not something that he'd have expected anyway.

The broom struck Shammi right between the eyes, and she dropped without a sound.

-------------

Kasumi, Nabiki, and Shampoo watched a laughing reunion between a four foot tall wood nymph and a six inch tall pixie. Kasumi was amused. Nabiki and Shampoo were...startled by seeing a naked woman with green hair and skin the color of birch bark. Though Shampoo vaguely remembered seeing the woman before, she'd been half-asleep the whole time she hadn't been completely asleep.

"Shampoo not going to ask."

Nabiki almost asked what Shampoo was talking about, but decided she'd rather not know.

"But of course, Bri'te! I have plenty of such things available to me, but what are you giving me in return?" Holly arched an eyebrow, knowing that the pixie wouldn't give up that male changeling of hers, but she felt she should be polite and at least make the try.

"You can't have Ranma," Featherbrite folded her arms and huffed as well as she could considering her stature. "These three are also under my protection and are only here to help me carry stuff back."

Nabiki and Shampoo instinctively moved a little closer to Kasumi. All three noted that Holly was interested in Ranma, but apparently couldn't have it. All three came to the conclusion that less competition was a good thing.

"No doubt," Holly nodded. She saw her opportunity for a little mischief and excitement. "So, if I make a request..."

Featherbrite groaned, she had a feeling the bargaining on this was going to be a problem...

---------------

Ryouga ran. He didn't care where, at present. Just as long as it was AWAY.

"Wo ai ni! Wo da airen!" Shammi bounced along behind Ryouga, using a number of phrases she remembered from watching a similar scene in a cartoon years ago. "Wait, bay-bee, wait for your lil' Shammi!"

"AAAAAaaaaaaaaa!" Ryouga went THROUGH a set of stacked construction drainpipes, leaving a little trail of dust in the air behind him as he attempted to break the sound barrier.

Vanilla noted that Shammi was making progress in what looked like a lazy bouncing gait, where Ryouga was running flat out and destroying obstacles in his way. Shammi was somehow managing to close the distance with Ryouga despite the apparent differences in their velocity. Interesting.

"I am coming for you, my little studmuffin!" Shammi was pleased. That cartoon turned out to be an accurate summation of foreign mating practices. Strange, but "when in Rome..."

"I am NOT your studmuffin!" Ryouga went through a wall, the backyard of some old man who was busy with bonsai, and out the front gate. Stopping when he saw that Shammi had gotten there first.

Shammi looked up, having used her Martial Arts Housekeeping skills to produce a cafe table, two chairs, two glasses, a nice (but not pretentious) bottle of red wine, and a loaf of french (of course) bread. "Ah, a jug of wine, a loaf of bread, .... and me?"

Ryouga screamed, turned, and fled. In that order. It had to be a trick. There was a pretty girl interested in him. It just HAD to be a trick.

By then, he'd managed to pique Shammi's interest.

---------

"WHAT?!" Nabiki blinked as she listened to the offer. She wondered what all this had to do with party supplies. "No! Absolutely not! I am NOT the one that hates boys! You want Akane!"

"Nabiki!" Kasumi managed to sound both startled and disapproving at the same time.

"Oh, well then, maybe someone else?"

"Shampoo not think so."

"Oh my. No. No, definitely not."

Featherbrite understood that this was the opening salvo of negotiations that could easily take a mortal decade. "Holly, my dear old friend, could we 'cut to the chase scene' as mortals say? What is it that you REALLY want?"

Holly blinked and began to slowly smile. "Well, since you put it THAT way."

"Shampoo no like that smile," the Amazon whispered to Kasumi. "Dryad not strike me as bad sort, but not Shampoo's type."

Kasumi nodded. She quite agreed. Nabiki noted the opinions and had also figured out this was just the opening salvo of negotiations. The wood nymph was throwing out requests that she knew would be refused.

"I want," Holly said brightly, "a changeling of my own!"

"Sorry, they're not THAT common, y'know."

"Oh," Holly mused. "Don't know anyone who was abused as a child who could use a long period of healing in the Faerie Realm?"

Nabiki stepped forward. "Excuse me, but I happen to know someone who fits the bill, but you're gonna have to get his agreement to come here."

"Really?!" Holly brightened by three degrees. Just the thing to put off the tedium and refresh the spirit. "He? You distinctly used the male pronoun. Where is he?"

Nabiki smirked. "I'll give you the details, but... there's something I want thrown into the deal." That the dryad wanted this so badly proved that Nabiki would be the superior negotiator here.

"Oh dear," said Shampoo and Kasumi in an eerie unison.

---------------

A few hours later, Shampoo, Kasumi, and Nabiki (the last whistling cheerfully) were walking in with large bulging satchels. Nabiki was clutching one in particular close to herself.

"Akane, have you been cooking?" Nabiki sniffed the air and immediately wished that she hadn't.

Kasumi rushed into the kitchen. "Aiyah!"

Shampoo and Nabiki both blinked at the odd exclamation, well at least it was odd coming from Kasumi. It was sufficient for them to find the disaster area that had once been a kitchen.

Blackened pots that would require the use of sandblasting to restore them to anywhere near their original condition were lying about the kitchen. Small unidentifiable lumps of multicolored material were spattered over a number of the surfaces. The microwave that had quite obviously been used to heat up one of the heirloom serving dishes that had once contained metal foil in the print design.

Everywhere one looked, the sign of some great natural disaster had occurred. The eye tended to jumble them all together rather than catalog each and every one of them, there were so many.

Shampoo came up behind Kasumi and gave her "big sister" a reassuring squeeze on the shoulder.

Nabiki looked at what Kasumi was holding in her hands. "Say, isn't that Mother's..."

Kasumi lay the shattered pieces of the large mixing bowl carefully in the trash, taking a moment to point out to her new "little sister" the kanji on the bottom that read "Tendo."

"Oh, Kasumi's mother make bowl? Oh. Maybe Ranma can fix?"

Kasumi's head snapped up. There was hope after all. Maybe that trick of Ranma's...

"Oh, Shampoo!" Akane breezed in, apparently not noticing the wreckage. "I made you some cookies! To thank you for saving me!"

Shampoo idly noted Kasumi and Nabiki were backing off and wondered what that meant.

"Cookies?" Shampoo turned her gaze to the plate of odd things sitting on the plate that Akane held up. "Is food?" It didn't LOOK like food. It looked like something left over from a cooking experiment she'd done when she was six.

Akane nodded with a little sound of agreement. "Yes, it took me a really long time to make them. Try one, they're good!"

Shampoo wondered what the panicked looks she was getting from her big sister meant. Certainly she didn't want to insult Kasumi's little sister by refusing some odd cultural dish. Shampoo plucked one up and made a show of popping it into her mouth.

"Oh no," Nabiki managed.

"Oh, Shampoo, we hardly knew you..."

"HEY!" Akane managed to glare and look hurt at the same time. "Shampoo likes them, I bet. Don't you, Shampoo? Shampoo?" Why was the Amazon turning purple?

"I'll call Doctor Tofu," Nabiki ran for the phone as Shampoo crumpled to the floor.

"Why is she doing that? They can't be THAT bad!"

--------------

By the next morning, Shampoo had recovered from her NDE (Near Death Experience). Thanking her mother for her Amazon constitution and powers of recovery, (not to mention the powerup from those faerie) Shampoo decided to avoid the youngest Tendo daughter rather than tempt fate. After all, she might make something else as an apology.

Akane wasn't quite sure why her sugar cookies had THAT sort of reaction. After all, they couldn't be too bland after she added the tabasco and blackstrap molasses. She was hoping that the oregano was counterbalanced by the subtle mango flavoring she'd added, and it had turned out this nice purple color that had matched Shampoo's hair...

But then, so had Shampoo until Doctor Tofu arrived with Mister Stomach Pump.

As for the next day, nothing much really occurred. Nabiki spent quite a bit of time with her new reading material. (Symple Spellcraft For The Apprentice, Divinations & Protective Magicks)

Ranma had a long talk with his imaginary friend, which made Akane wonder if she was the only sane person in the household.

Ryouga managed to get lost, while Shammi considered this level of resistance to possibly mean that: a) he wasn't interested in girls, or b) he was already married. Ryouga continued to wander while Shammi continued to track him. Tigar continued to follow Shammi, as she felt that this particular soap opera was of more interest than a quick return to the village.

Di Na wondered why her magic jar had "Vlasic Pickles" written on it, and seemed not to be working. She wondered about this for an entire ten seconds before starting off on a tirade about little girls messing with their betters.

Deciding to try and find Shampoo without Tigar's help, and really not wanting to get involved in Shammi's soap opera, a certain albino Amazon decided to ask if her fellow Amazon had been seen. Vanilla calmly and quietly interviewed a girl who was out jogging in the morning, reasoning that since the girl in question seemed to be something of a warrior (judging by the punches and kicks she threw while jogging) that she'd be the most calm and reasoned of any likely contacts.

Vanilla was quite surprised to be attacked, and was still trying to find a better translation dictionary as the one she had was quite obviously flawed.

Akane woke up shortly thereafter, knowing that with those red eyes and pale skin, that she was being hunted by yet another vampire. How this one managed to survive being out on a sunlit day, she had no idea, but she would be ready THIS time. And why did she have this smell of ice cream lingering on her?

Bane and the others of the Juuban party started following the manga artist under the notion that the Dark Kingdom would attack her again and they had to be ready.

-------------

Three days after the vampire attack, Genma and Soun exchanged a glance with raised eyebrows. Their plan had gone a little off track, but was otherwise still deemed viable.

One keg of sake sat at their end of the table. It was holding up quite well, as the two had merely been sipping for most of the night.

There had been some reluctance from the various others, which had gradually eroded. Between Shampoo and Kasumi, there had been considerable amounts of food made, which had required something to wash it down with.

Kasumi had been sipping at some warm sake, but was now spending a lot of time with a little smile on her face and staring at some point in midair.

Nabiki had protested at first but was currently flushed and had loosened her top as if she were quite warm. She was also leaning against Ranma in what Genma viewed as a promising manner.

Akane had passed out, which had disappointed Soun considerably. He still had considerable hopes on Akane as backup if the Ranma + Nabiki attempt failed.

Shampoo was refilling cups again, and looked like she would be joining Akane in slumberland at any moment.

"Well, Saotome," Soun said to his longtime friend. "I think we probably ought to go check out that new bar, don't you?"

"Quite right, Tendo." Genma smirked. "We probably won't be back until morning."

"Karaoke?" Nabiki's eyes tried to focus on her father. She hadn't drunk THAT much, why was her head so fuzzy? She felt her body relax itself against Ranma. She felt SO warm. So relaxed, so... naughty.

Featherbrite watched all this with some satisfaction, now if the fathers would just get out of the way, she could get on with her main task. Neither could see her, but if she started weaving magic there was no telling what would happen.

Ranma excused himself, gently moved Akane and Nabiki off of him, and made his way to the toilet.

Soun noted the way Ranma wobbled and smiled. Everything was going as planned.

"Aiyaaa, Shampoo need to get something to eat. Not used to drinking this much..." Shampoo realized that maybe she should take a nap first.

Genma waved his friend into the back yard where they could have a more private conversation.

"The drugged sake is working," Genma whispered to Soun.

"We'll leave briefly, come back when they've all passed out. If we put Nabiki and Ranma to bed, surely the boy's shyness will be overwhelmed." Soun nodded. If nothing else, he knew Nabiki. If Nabiki wanted something, she wouldn't hesitate to go after it. At least she didn't go around finding things and signing her name on them to indicate they were HERS. Keeping her away from magic markers had been a problem that year.

"Then, with grandchildren on the way, they'll HAVE to be married, and our plan to train the grandchild as the Anything Goes Heir will be assured."

Back in the house, Featherbrite was weaving and shaping the spell energies as she'd planned. It was really too bad that Ranma had kept her from adding all those wonderful little additives. If she could have done that, Featherbrite saw no reason that Ranma couldn't have married the whole group and taken them as lifemates. Why if it was good enough for that overweight Sultan, then it was good enough for her friend Ranma!

Though with the barely suppressed libido she saw in that Kasumi, (no wonder she didn't notice a lot of what was going on around her, the mental effort of suppressing THAT must be enormous) Featherbrite thought it likely that Ranma would be too exhausted to be coherent for quite some time.

What a pity that Featherbrite hadn't been able to sneak any of that in. Featherbrite sighed as the unfairness of not taking advantage of this situation hit her, it would certainly have cut some of the tension level down.

--------

She carefully set her bags down. This had gone on *quite* long enough! "You can come out now!"

Another passerby on the street gave her an odd look.

She tried again. "I know you're there. I've seen you repeatedly over the past few days. You might as well come out."

There, a glimpse of movement where there shouldn't be.

"You sees us?"

"You've forgotten that store windows are glass, and glass reflects things," the pharmacist-turned-writer indicated the street. "Now come on up to my apartment. It's going to rain tonight."

Several brightly colored forms slipped out of the shadows, startling Naoko by their number and appearance. She'd only spotted the pudgy one for the most part. "It's polite in Japan to introduce yourself. I'm Naoko Takeuchi, but I think you've heard of me." The "Art Of Sailor Moon" book was pretty indicative of such a case.

The blonde had changed out of her Sailor Moon odango (she'd kept getting the ponytails tangled) and nodded. "Am Bane. Leader of rescue expedition."

The Hindu-looking girl bowed from the waist, hands in her sleeves and crossed in front of her. "Spice."

The perky looking girl bounced and winked. "Sugar am pleased meet you."

The slightly overweight girl frowned. "Dina. We ask, you talk."

Naoko led them to her apartment, and was amused to see the girls inspecting things as if they almost expected large insects to come popping out of nowhere. Remembering the giant bug, that dampened the amusement some.

"I make tea, yes?" The girl named Sugar declared.

"So, Takeuchi-san, we need ask you questions," the blonde said. "Village attacked by Dark Kingdom. Dark Kingdom show up here. We need know how fight. Need know how you know."

The manga artist considered that. After seeing one of those *things* she wasn't inclined to throw the concept out. Had to be a coincidence though, all she'd done was combine the concepts of a themed sentai show with the magical girl genre. Some of it was straight out of other series like "Rose Of Versailles."

Right?

--------

Genma came to a stop as a shape appeared out of nowhere before him. The shock cleared most of the sake-induced haze from his mind. Soun was already on his way back, Genma would join him at the gate, then they'd ensure the Tendo-Saotome Alliance!

"Mister Saotome, I have a business proposition for you." The man lit a cigarette and placed his back against a lightpost, calmly gazing at the martial artist in front of him.

"Business? I don't know what you're talking about."

"It's quite simple, Mister Saotome. Your son is a minor, under YOUR authority. I represent a group of people who are...interested in some of the properties of that cursed form of his."

"So what's that got to do with me?" Genma tried to clear the rest of the haze from his mind. He had the feeling that this was something important. He was also aware of others surrounding him. This many, while he was impaired by the alcohol, might be more than he could handle.

"I have here a contract, Mister Saotome. You sign your son over to us, assist in his capture, and you get a considerable sum of money. In addition, we'll assist you with some of the costs involved in child raising as this is something else we're quite...interested in seeing."

"I don't know, the boy's my only heir, I..."

Isao smirked at the man before him. "We're not that Hisakawa person. Ranma is worth FAR more to us alive and unharmed than vivisected. We want to do this legally, however, at least as much as possible."

"Hisakawa?" Genma couldn't remember the name. Taking the contract he scanned over the first page but was having trouble focussing on the packed text. It looked okay, he'd sign over his parental rights to Ranma for the next two years, and he'd get...

Genma looked up at the businessman before him and licked suddenly dry lips. "Is this...accurate?"

"Yes," Isao said with a nod. His eyes never left Genma's own gaze. "Two million now, plus we assist in the childbearing and childrearing costs, even throw in something for the happy couple when they marry in two years."

Genma blinked. "Do you have a pen?"
=======================================