Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction ❯ Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back 1/2 ❯ Introducing friends! A side of Kasumi we never really see. ( Chapter 2 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

"Guys, this is one of the best cafés in Nerma. The Cat Café." Brian said as they stood outside the entrance to the café.

"Dude, is this the place where that tough bitch is working?" Jay asked.

"Yep, but don't call her that." Brian responded as he opened the door. "HEY SHAMPOO!" Brian yelled. Just then, the blue haired Amazon appeared.

"Ni-ho Brian. Where is Ranma?" Shampoo asked.

"He and the others are back at the dojo discussing what to have for dinner." Brian said. "In the meantime, I'm introducing everyone to my friends from New Jersey. This is Jay and Silent Bob." Brian said as he pointed to them.

"Hey." Jay said. "Is it true that you are one of those strong bitches?" Jay said not thinking, as usual.

"Shampoo don't know." She said with a mischievous grin, just before she…

*WHAM*

…Knocked Jay out of the café.

"Little kid tell Shampoo." Shampoo said.

"DON'T CALL ME KID!" Jay shouted.

"I warned him." Brian said. Bob just nodded before lighting up a cigarette.

"I'm sorry young man, there's no smoking here." An old lady said. Bob just rolled his eyes out of anger.

"Oh, this is Shampoo's great grandmother, Cologne." Brian said. "Don't make her mad, she's got the same temper her great granddaughter has." Bob just backed away and went to Jay. However, Mousse is trying to get to Jay.

"HOW DARE YOU CALL MY SHAMPOO A…" However, Brian tripped him.

"He never thinks." Brian said and Bob nodded. "Oh no, I met Mousse this time." Bob gave an `Oh' look. "Anyways, I come with news about Ranma."

"OOOOOOOOOOO! Maybe Ranma finally dump Akane to be with his Shampoo." Shampoo said.

"Saotome, if you do anything to my Shampoo, you're…" But before Mousse can finish, Brian stomped the back of his head.

"Well…" Brian said nervously.

`Man, what do I do?' He thought. `On the one hand, Shampoo deserves to know and if Ranma tells her, she'll ether kill him, Akane, or both. But I don't want to hurt her.'

"JUST FUCKING TELL HER!" Jay said.

"JAY! SHUT UP!" Brian said.

"Tell Shampoo what?" Shampoo said with a curious look.

`Now or I start funeral processions for Ranma and Akane.' Brian thought. "Shampoo, Ranma and Akane made their engagement official a few days ago." Brian said, and Shampoo just looked shocked.

"No…" she said in disbelief.

"I was there, they had an argument and their feelings came out." He continued.

"No!" Shampoo said sounding both angry and sad.

"Then they talked it out and made it official. The wedding rehearsal is next month along with the dinner and the wedding itself is in 2 months." Brian said.

"NO!" Shampoo said crying and running out of the café.

"SHAMPOO! WAIT!" Brian said as he followed.

"SHAMPOO! I'M H…" Mousse said, but before he could finish, Cologne whapped him upside the head.

"No, let him talk to her. Shampoo really needs someone who cares about her right now." She said.

"Whoa, you mean Brian likes that chick?" Jay said.

"At least he likes her as a friend." Cologne said with a mischievous smile.

**************************************************************** ********

On a rooftop, Shampoo was crying her heart out.

`Why? Why Ranma choose Akane over me?' Shampoo thought.

"I know what you're thinking and its because he views you more as a friend than a love." Brian said as he climbed up to the roof.

"You stay away from Shampoo! You hurt Shampoo bad!" Shampoo said.

"Shampoo, I told you first because I knew that if Ranma or Akane told you, you'd try to kill them." Brian said.

"But…" Shampoo said but Brian interrupted her.

"However, that doesn't mean that you and Ranma can't be good friends. The same goes for you and Akane, I mean in the times I didn't see you two fight, I saw that you guys got a long just fine for a few minutes." Brian said. Shampoo started to cheer up.

"Yeah, that true." Shampoo said.

"And besides, I bet you now that Ranma and Akane made it official, guys will be fighting for you left and right." Brian said.

"Is true?" Shampoo said sounding cheered up.

"Of course. You're beautiful, strong, caring, and smart. The only thing I'd actually improve is your Japanese." Brian said. Shampoo chuckled at his little joke.

"Thank you Brian. You help Shampoo." Shampoo said.

"Hey, I'm your friend, I don't like seeing you said." Brian said. The two then looked at each other, and moved closer, until…

"HEY! WHEN DO WE FUCKING EAT?! I GOT THE FUCKING MUNCHIES!" Jay shouted. The two friends stopped, looked at each other, and blushed.

"Um… uh…" Was all Brian could say.

"Um… It late. Got to help Great Grandmother with restaurant." Shampoo said.

"Yeah, and I got to get back to the dojo. Friends?" Brian said as he extended his hand.

"Friends." Shampoo said as she shook it and then left.

`Not to self, kill Jay.' Brian thought as he got off the roof.

**************************************************************** ********

At the dojo, Brian, Jay and Bob got in just as Ranma and the others decided what to have.

"Then it's agreed, noodles it is." Kasumi said. Bob got a funny feeling in his stomach.

"Dude, I know a great Japanese pizza place. It's run by another fiancée." Brian said and Bob nodded excitedly.

"You dudes can get some pizza, I'm going to try some of that hot b…" Jay said.

"JAY! Not here, not now." Brian said.

"…Girl's food." Jay said. "Better?"

"Much." Brian said, then he ran into Soun. "Hey Soun, tell Kasumi that Bob and I are bringing food for the both of us from Ukyo's." Brian said.

"Are you sure you two don't want noodles?" Soun said. "Kasumi makes the best in town."

"Lunchbox had a rather bad experience with noodles dude." Jay said.

"How?" Soun asked.

"You want me to tell you before we eat? Dude, you're fucking sick." Jay said.

"Lets get that pizza." Brian said as he and Bob left.

**************************************************************** ********

At Ukyo's, Ukyo was having a typical day. Plenty of customers, lots of orders…

"Hey Ukyo."

…And a friend dropping in.

"Hey Brian." Ukyo said. "Who's your pal?"

"This is Silent Bob." Brian said and Bob waved.

"So, will it be the usual? I also got a special order for my Ranma honey." Ukyo said.

"Two of the usual, and as for Ranma… well…" Brian said as he told Ukyo everything.

**************************************************************** ********

"Is it ready yet?" Jay asked Kasumi for the tenth time.

"Almost, just wait a minute." Kasumi said. Then, for a minute, nothing until…

"Is it ready yet?" Jay asked.

"I said just a minute!" Kasumi said in a tone that is never heard from her: Anger.

"Ok, ok. Chill." Jay said. `Maybe just one bite.' Jay thought.

**************************************************************** ********

"Man, remind me never to tell a woman with a combat spatula that her man made the engagement to the other woman official." Brian said as he was walking down the street with Bob holding his head. "At least she gave us the pizzas and apologized." Brian said and Bob nodded. The opened the door to the dojo when they heard…

*CRASH*

…And saw a dazed Jay.

"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU TO WAIT?! GOD!" Kasumi said and was she ever angry. Brian and the others looked in shock.

"He… he made her pissed!" Brian said amazed. "I've never even seen her angry. How the hell did he… Oh no." He said when it dawned on him. "Jay, you didn't?" Brian asked.

"Yeah, I got a case of the munchies." Jay said.

"You couldn't wait until she was done?" Bob said, shocking the Tendos and the Saotomes. "What?"

"You… can talk?" Genma said.

"Yeah, so?" Bob said.

"Isn't your name Silent Bob?" Akane said

"Yeah, so? That doesn't mean I'm totally silent." Bob said.

"The trick is to get him to shut up when he talks about Amy." Jay said and Brian nodded in response.