Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Third Labor (Forward to the past) ❯ Payback ( Chapter 17 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Third Labor, by Gregg Sharp aka Metroanime@mindspring.com
Chapter 17: "Payback"

Disclaimer: Would you believe my dragon ate my disclaimer?

"Welcome to my nightmare." - A.Cooper

---------

Ranma/Akumakun timeline:

Akane watched the battle through narrowed eyes. She'd mainly gotten the fur out of her eyes at least.

One, some gnarled little pervert who had groped her sister, was incredibly skilled and had declared himself to be the Master of her family's school of martial arts!

The other, her tormentor for the past few weeks. Chief tormentor, Akane corrected herself. She was still running into people at school who were repeating one or more of the "1001 Things I'd Rather Do With Akane Than Be Engaged To Her."

And what was with those little yellow pills Kasumi kept giving her to take with every meal? No, this had nothing to do with that. Besides, they gave her a bit more focus to her anger, therefore her strength. Focus.

The two were blurring as they unleashed one set of special manuevers after another. All while Akane watched and rooted for the little guy that Jared Saotome was picking on. Okay, the little fellow (Happy Sign?) was a pervert. But what if he could teach her? He was the Master of her school, right? Even that pointy-eared freak didn't dispute that.

Akane wasn't thinking at all clearly. Kasumi had gotten the prescription for mood intensifiers when Akane had actually been someone else in Akane's body. Suicidal chronic depression had brought out the big guns: psychochemicals. The little yellow pills had been given to Akane regularly, and Kasumi had (without the doctor's authorization) upped the dosage after Akane had gone from depressed to manic.

On top of that, Jared Saotome had belittled her on a regular basis. Ranma Saotome had been her unwanted fiance briefly, then after she had declared that "as far as I'm concerned our engagement never happened" - he had quietly agreed with her decision. Nabiki had taken up the honor burden. Another source of aggravation: her middle sister had become a freakish feline creature. Who moved faster and had greater strength than Akane did! Nor did Nabiki remain quiet about this, constantly rubbing it in with comments: "Akane, you wouldn't believe how easy it is to run from rooftop to rooftop!" "Oh, I'm sorry Akane, I forgot you're stuck trudging along on the roads." "Sorry, Akane, I didn't see you there." "Hey, Akane, watch this! I'm even stronger and faster than you are now! AND sexier!" "Hey, Akane, we're going out to the range to beat up some cattle rustlers. C'mon, it'll be fun."

Akane snorted. Then had to clean her fur. Like *that* would have happened. No, she'd have just been shown up again.

Black Bart was obviously an ineffective ally. One sniff of Kasumi's cooking and he'd babble out nearly anything. He also played by some absurd "Code Of The West." Not that she was ever comfortable with this silly "Old West" stuff.

This "Happysigns" geezer, on the other hand, practiced "Anything Goes School Of Indiscriminate Grappling" - where Anything Goes seemed to be the actual case.

A plan gelled in Akane's mind. She'd become the Anything Goes heir, learn everything that old man could teach her, then use that to humiliate the Saotomes. Then she'd kick the geezer off the Tendo property.

-----------

Jared finally got into position and whumped the little pervert into the ground with enough force that Happosai was six feet under before he slowed down.

"This isn't enough to even begin to..." Happosai began from his position in the pit, getting ready to dig an escape tunnel.

Jared was ready. The spell was one that the Delphins Amazons had used in their Spelljamming phase. "TON OF DIRT!"

*THUMPH!* A rather large ball of dirt that had hung momentarily suspended in the air came down on the top of the hole.

Jared followed that quickly up with another spell, likewise developed by the Delphins for use in ship-to-ship conflicts. It was a tricky one, and it had been modified from a version on a world called Athas. For one thing it was contained in a gemstone wrapped in oak leaves and bound with mistletoe sprigs. "PROLIFIC VEGETATION!"

"Uhm, could someone let me out?" Happosai said from somewhere underneath the mass of shrubbery. "These roots seem to be a bit tough."

"Oh, don't worry, 'Master Happosai'," Jared said. "You're used to being in a cave. A cage of roots isn't *that* different. I'll let you out. Eventually." ~When you repent.~

-----------

SASAMI analyzed the possibilities. There was a small chance that Happosai would try to find and access her neuralnet. If he did, there was a 99.997% chance that he would trigger her to her Doomsday protocols - TSUNAMI. If that happened, Happosai had a .00001% chance of avoiding being torn to atomic particles. There was only a 1.875% chance that this would be overlooked by the rest of the household. SASAMI wanted to maintain her "background" status as much as possible.

SASAMI estimated the maximum time she could maintain anonyminity as being one year. By that time, however, she estimated that she could have had backups built and copied in two other locations. She could, and would, defend herself against intruders more forcefully than she would against members of her household. But if TSUNAMI activated, all bets were off.

--------------

Third Labor Timeline:

Jerem stood on the deck of the ship, staring out at the oceans surrounding him. He was a swarthy man, not one of the priesthood, but a farmer who'd spent years watching his children get buried. If not in childbirth, they died in accidents, died of illness, died for no apparent reason, but the plain fact was that he'd fathered seven children. Six lay in their graves. One would have died of illness the previous winter, a wet cough that had taken two of his other sons. It had also taken his first wife.

Jerem himself was the seventh child of his parents, and six of those had died in similar manner. His parents had died in their thirties, which was pretty common in Jerem's experience. It was a tough life, farming in the 8th, now the 9th, Century. Weather was unpredictable, bugs and wild animals ravaged the crop, all so that the farmer could work from the light of pre-dawn until it got too dark to see. One worked one's land until you died, then you were buried to become one with the soil, leaving the hard labor to the next generation. All you could try to do was make it easier on that next generation, leaving something more for them to inherit. And he'd buried six sons and two wives now, and had thought it likely that his generation would end his line.

The gruff, tough, weatherbeaten man stood in the rain and smiled as he heard his seventh child laugh down in the hold, followed by the piping laugh of his third wife, Ruth.

He didn't know what to make of the priests and their blessings. Of the tales that the Church had split, and there was now a Church Of Lindisfarne that had split from the Papal Seat. He'd never seen a Roman, or even visited farther than the monastary, until this journey he hadn't really thought about it and had supposed that Rome was a bit past that hill. Maybe twenty days travel.

He didn't know about this 'New Science' or this talk about a millstone that ran with nothing but the wind to move it. He'd seen the tower, of course, but hadn't paid it much mind. Jerem Tallman, so called because he was nearly six feet four in height, didn't really understand all this talk about teas and libraries and new ways of getting more crops. He'd believe it when he saw it, he supposed. He couldn't read or write, his vocabulary was much more limited than that of the priests, and his hands were rough from labor. He believed mainly in what he saw or felt or worked.

No, Jerem Tallman didn't understand the vast majority of these odd things. He didn't care.

What he *did* know, and care about, was that a few dozen feet away, he had a son. One that would have died except for a priest laying hands on the boy and curing his cough. For *that* Jerem Tallman would follow these priests to their new land and set up a new cottage and farm.

And everytime he heard his boy chuckle or laugh, Jerem Tallman would do something he'd rarely done in his life. Smile. And give thanks.

Jerem Tallman was neither brilliant nor handsome nor educated, but he had his priorities.

The number one priority was seeing his son, dubbed Jerek as a birthname, then "Ranma" at his christening (an odd name, but when Jerem had heard a priest discussing it with another he had decided it would do) just before the ships set sail, grow up tall and strong and healthy.

And a good fighter. Otherwise the other children might make fun of his name.

------------

The sergeants and their soldiers swarmed over Lindesfarne. They had sought, and they had come here in their thousands, and they had come to destroy the heretics.

So far they had managed to find six goats, four sheep, and a cow.

They had quickly been found guilty of heresy and put to the fire. In a manner of speaking.

Which pretty much took care of their first day. Then this mighty host looked about and waited.

The greatest army ever assembled. Soldiers from dozens of nations and kingdoms. Warriors well skilled with pike and bow and sword. All ready to rout the greatest evil ever to walk the face of the Earth.

And they looked and searched and waited.

And they also talked. And discovered that there was something basically wrong with this picture. Or with the stories they'd been told to marshall their forces and bring them here.

First off, there was no river of blood. Four armed giants also seemed to be quite scarce. There were no evidence of practitioners of black arts, nor of unholy summonings, nor even traces of the vast pile of gold and treasure. No inverted crucifixes, no demonic entities, and the "fountain filled with the blood of children" turned out to be a water basin in which a few frogs croaked. The only evidence of bloody sacrifices that they found were, in fact, in their own encampment.

Six goats, four sheep, and a cow, to be precise.

They might have gone home to tell of the terrible battle they'd just been through. (Somehow, going home to impress the girls with tales of how you'd gotten seasick for two weeks then tried to stave off boredom for another week just didn't seem right.)

They might have.

That is if the Vikings, having a truly abyssmal run of bad luck and poor timing, hadn't picked this exact time to avenge their earlier loss.

Which is why there *was* a great battle of Lindisfarne, where two *terribly* unlucky Viking war parties managed to sneak up on the monastery and surprise what turned out to be a rather large force of armed and bored-nearly-out-of-their-skins warriors. Armed with, as previously noted, pikes and swords. Oh yes, and the bows. Those got quite a bit of use.

However, as there were three such Viking war parties, one managed to get onto the ships that had brought all those soldiers.

Who ended up watching their own ships go sailing off, having been captured and manned by said Vikings.

This ended up having several effects. First and most obvious, the soldiers ended up occupying Lindesfarne for six months. By that time, each and every one of the soldiers, their sergeants, and their officers, were most heartily sick of Lindesfarne and most especially of Vikings.

Second, to suicidally attack a larger force in order to embarass, inconvenience, and do something terribly sneaky would be known as "to pull a Viking" on one's target. Giving the Norsemen a reputation for courageous sneakiness and treachery that had very little basis in reality. Worse, after getting those ships and supplies, one clan of Viking raiders immediately decided that this was The Way To Go. Resulting in a clan of Vikings who spent the next four hundred years developing something along the line of Viking Ninjas aka "The Warriors Of Freyr."

Third was the natural conclusion of one bright young officer named Mallory, who put together the information in a form that swept the length and breadth of the army despite language barriers. The Vikings, he reasoned, were the actual evil sorcerers. The monks at Lindisfarne must have been slaughtered, then impersonated by these foul fiends in order to cover up their nefarious plot. Not respecting the sanctity of anything other than their own rites, they'd looted the place after the Papal Investigator had left. Then they had lain in wait for the authorities to arrive, duped by the report of the Investigator, in order to steal the supplies and ships in order to use in some diabolical plot!

As those raiders had indeed used the familiar looking vessels to pull into a port without alarming anyone, and had then robbed the entire city blind, this was corroborated. And it had the much appreciated benefit of making the soldiers look like something other than complete idiots. Instead they were victims of supernatural forces, cunning and crafty heathens, and fearsome warriors. Only their own skills and righteousness allowed them to survive (by the time the soldiers returned home it had gone from dozens of Vikings to thousands, all armed with axes that howled for human blood) and by the grace of God himself were the casualties as light as they were. (In fact a statue was raised to a knight known as Ligius at Lindesfarne later, as the story had him dying of wounds as he slew a dozen of the enemy in glorious combat. Which was certainly more heroic than what really happened which was him dying of dysentary.)

This story satisfied enough people that Mallory was promoted again, twice. Many of the soldiers lived long and comfortable lives, often retelling the epic battle of Lindisfarne. After all, Mallory's interpretation made everyone look good.

Except one.

The Papal Investigator.

Who was beheaded for being an idiot and not figuring out the truth. Or removed as being a political embarrassment. It depends on one's point of view actually.

------------

On a mountaintop in Thailand, Setsuna Meiou stalled and landed her huge silvery form to stare at the scene.

There was Ami, no less huge, curled protectively around Nuku, Grey, and Honey.

There was Honey, Grey, and Nuku huddled up against Ami. A tangle of limbs.

Honey was smiling. Nuku was smiling and *purring* while Grey was still completely out of it. Based on the utter lack of expression, Setsuna decided that the placement of various hands and limbs was caused by something other than naughtiness.

Grumbling about missing out on the party, the silver dragon sniffed at the odor of magic and determined that something was wrong. As there were no other scents, she assumed it was Ami's foul up. She could also tell that there hadn't been any naughtiness occurring, and surprised herself by the sudden relief.

Well, she was a chronomancer among other things, and almost all mages knew this one. "Dispel Magic."

The threads of spell energy began coming undone as the "shears" of the counterspell went through them. It didn't wake them up, of course, it merely cut their sleep short.

Setsuna could be a bit impatient at times, but she wanted a nap herself. Flying across the Sea of Japan was *quite* tiring.

---------------

Ranma/Akumakun timeline:

"It's a simple deal, take it or leave it," declared Akane.

Happosai sighed. He didn't think this girl could *ever* be enough to challenge that Jared. He wouldn't do this even then if he could help it. "There is... a way. But no, it's too cruel. A girl would never survive it!"

Akane's pride engaged. She was more than tired of not being taken seriously. "I can do it, don't underestimate me because I'm a girl!"

Happosai sighed again. He didn't like it, but the need for revenge, as well as getting out of this damn cage, was forcing his hand. "Very well."

"Your word as a martial artist?" Akane pressed.

"Yes, yes. I'll even swear it on a set of panties," the perverted Master replied. "I will make you the Heir to Anything Goes and do everything in my power as Master of the school to get you to the point where you can fight that young pup as an equal."

Akane considered, but didn't see where she'd made any mistakes. "You've got to work quickly though."

Happosai nodded. He was loathe to do this, particularly to a girl, but this furry one had set the conditions. "Very well. I'll have to prepare for it though, so I've got to be free. There *is* a training technique that will empart large amounts of my skills to you overnight."

Akane clenched a fist and grinned. "The sooner you start, the sooner I can reclaim my life."

Happosai had his doubts. The "Monkey See Monkey Do" technique had some major side effects. But this girl was way too hairy to be cute, so it wasn't a *big* loss. The least she could do was shave her tongue.

----------------

:Power Plant - 20%
:Integrity field - 15%
:Primary stove - 350 degrees
:Hot water - 97 degrees
:Scanners - online, passive
:Shields - standby
:Damage control - ready
:All systems nominal

SASAMI was content, no dangers threatened. She flicked her POV from one room to another.

There was Nabiki, sleeping comfortably in her room. Despite that she was a catgirl, there was enough human for medical monitoring to indicate normal REM sleep. The slight smile indicated that it was a pleasant dream. SASAMI made a note that Nabiki's ears twitched as part of REM sleep. She'd have to compile an entirely new medical database for catgirls, and allocated processors to search the Internet and any available information stores for further data. There was something about the way Nabiki was sleeping that just radiated a certain contentment. How odd.

Flick. Kasumi was in the kitchen, making a curry dish. SASAMI was a little surprised to see a human version of an AI that she'd interfaced with, but it took all kinds, she supposed.

Flick. One of the guests was located in the large soaking tub that occupied a large section of the roof garden. SASAMI recorded her vitals and patterns as matching Ukyo Kuonji. Though the girl currently had significantly altered her profile by losing the chest bindings. Temperature was nominal. Respiration and heartrate within normal parameters.

Flick. Another guest located. Shampoo was apparently not familiar with some of the fruit trees in that particular garden. Not unexpected, though one would think the aroma would have alarmed someone being observant. The fruit tree known as a githki produced purplish fruit that resembled a zuchinni in overall shape. In order to protect the fruit from insects, there was a natural fermentation process that occurred, making the fruit mildly intoxicating. The genetically enhanced varieties that had been planted here were brightly floral, and the fruit was no longer mild in any sense of the word.

Shampoo had apparently been heading for the soaking area. Her towel was open, she was flat on her back, and if it hadn't been for the warmth and humidity of the garden area, SASAMI would have been concerned that the girl was going to catch cold. As it was, SASAMI directed a warm air jet to blow over the girl to keep her as warm and comfortable as possible. Also to direct the medical dispenser on this floor to put aspirin in the front row. Readings indicated that while Shampoo might be a tough warrior, her tolerance for alcohol was surprisingly low.

SASAMI flicked to another area, where Soun Tendo had found (third floor, behind the linens) the steam room. And apparently invited his buddy. Then she clicked her Surveillance mode for replay later. This looked important.

"I don't know if I can ever forgive you drawing all those missiles towards my ancestral home, Saotome," said Soun, sitting on one of the cypress benches and leaning back against the warm stone.

"Well, all's well that ends well, Tendo!" Genma took another ladleful of water and splashed the hot stones with it. "After all, look how well it turned out. IF I don't say so myself. And soon our lifelong dream of uniting the houses will be accomplished."

"What about that Shampoo girl or that Black Fox. Or whatever she's calling herself now." Soun sighed in lazy contentment as another wave of steam was sent out. Just the thing for old bones.

"What about them? Why look at the two lovebirds. They can barely say a civil word in between them, my son is always insulting and belittling her. Your daughter calls him a monster, a freak, a pervert, and tries to pound him on a regular basis. With sparks like that, they'll be married before you know it." Genma sat back and wiped his glasses on his towel.

"Yes, I agree, Akane and Jared are a perfect match. Ordained by the Heavens themselves," Soun pronounced. Ah, he remembered how Kimiko would fly into red rages at almost every opportunity. "I was speaking of the other couple, however."

"Ranma and Nabiki?" Genma scratched his head. "I don't know, Tendo. She's a little strange. I don't know how I'd break the news to my wife that her daughter-in-law isn't entirely human."

"And who's fault is *that*, Saotome!" Soun found a recessed panel in the wall and pressed it. SASAMI determined that if the two got to drinking, there was a 95% chance this would delay their doing something foolish, and there was a 21% chance that any plans they hatched would be forgotten halfway through the binge.

"Sake?!" Soun withdrew a small wooden box and two small ceramic vials, which he somehow knew would be at exactly the proper temperature. A moment later he was staring at his empty hands.

"Hmmm," said Genma, savoring the flavor. "Maybe we should do something about pairing Kasumi up with Ranma. Get her to slap him around some, maybe..."

"Yes, that's the ticket," Soun agreed as he withdrew another pair of bottles from the recess. "We'll have both of your sons married to my daughters in no time! In fact, we should make arrangements for a priest as soon as possible!"

"Quite true, Tendo, quite true," Genma said, masking his relief that he'd successfully taken the conversation away from his fault in getting the first Tendo home blown up.

-----------------

"I half expected Black Bart to come back throwing dynamite," said Jared, luxuriating in having defeated something evil. Well, partly evil. Certainly annoying.

Ranma blinked, amazed that his big brother could be *that* dense. "Black Bart? Throwing dynamite? In *Kasumi's* yard?"

Jared winced. "Good point, I missed that."

"Drugged roses, maybe, but explosives?" Ranma shook his head. "What's this roof made of anyway, looks kind of like black glass but it's not."

Jared considered briefly the chance that SASAMI did not have sound pickups. Too low. "SASAMI, alter polarity of roof to see-through."

Ranma pinwheeled his arms briefly as the black glass parts of the dome became transparent. "WHAT THE HECK?!"

Jared checked the material. "Let me guess. Some high tech glass, you can select whether to make it silver, clear, or black at will?"

SASAMI's hologram appeared. "One way or two way, dependent on need. The material is a clear polymer with a tensile strength just shy of steel. There are four roof access points, by the way."

"Uhm..."

"Ranma, this is SASAMI. She'd appreciate it if you didn't mention her presence to anyone. SASAMI, this is Ranma." Jared introduced the two.

"How do you do? I'm SASAMI, pleased ta meet ya!" SASAMI's representation bowed.

"Uhm, she's a..." Ranma tried to say ghost or apparition.

"Artificial Intelligence, though I prefer the term 'obake-kikai' (machine ghost)." Sasami smiled and cocked her head to the side in a cute gesture. "Though I'm currently recording something that you two ought to see as soon as you can."

"Maybe later," suggested Jared. He was about to say something else when Ranma happened to glance down.

"YAHG!" Ranma almost developed a nosebleed.

Jared looked down. There was Shampoo. Asleep. Mostly not wearing that towel.

"Oh man," Ranma shook like a leaf, trying to look anywhere else. "That was. I mean YAHG!?"

Jared looked around, trying to see what had caused little brother Ranma to nearly collapse. Oh, Ukyo. Taking a bath. "SASAMI, could you restore the polarization to previous levels?"

SASAMI was puzzled but complied. "What's wrong with him? Pulse and respiration are wild." He turned into a girl every time he got wet, so just seeing a naked girl shouldn't effect him like this, should it?

"Eyestrain," offered Jared. "I think little brother needs to rest. It's been a rough day."

-------------

Shinji stirred his "famous" potato-chicken soup before putting the lid back on the crockpot and started on dessert. Ami had certainly been...

Well, shy certainly hadn't seemed the correct term. And since she really liked chess pie, that was what Ami would get.

"To protect the timelines from contamination,
To purify from infestation!"

"Shut up with the Team Rocket crap!" The kunoichi declared. "Getting out of that timeline was tough, but now we can deal with this idiot once and for all."

Shinji frowned and shucked his apron. "Whoever you jerkoffs are, you have three seconds to get out before I call the cops."

"Hah!" The kunoichi hahhed. "This is the end of this timeline, *and* of you."

The one in power armor pointed the nozzle of some weapon at Shinji, then discharged it. "Martial arts against a few thousand needle rounds a second? I don't think so. Not that this'll kill you. I was careful in which parts I shot off."

"Good, he won't reincarnate then. Set up the dimensional bomb." The kunoichi sneered at the bloodied figure spread across the floor. "Once he's dead, maybe we'll get Al out of that damn 'third labor' timeline."

The guy in the power armor shrugged and put a mechanical egg down. "When this timeline is dead and gone, you mean. Yeesh. Even the original Evangelion timeline was better than this. No decent bars anywhere."

The kunoichi looked down into the remaining good eye of the cook. "Now, you don't have to take it personally. It isn't. Well, not completely. Well, maybe to some extent. Ta ta!"

"Hey, he's a Hemingway fan!" The trooper picked up two of Shinji's limbs. "A 'Farewell to Arms', get it?"

"I think you spent *way* too much time on that Pokemon world," groaned the female ninja. "Besides, it's not as if we're villains. We're heroes, freeing the only real dimension (that's home) from stupid puritannical laws that have no place in a modern world. Let's blow this place before it blows."

"Now that we've finally dealt with the minor underling, we can concentrate on bringing down the bigger fish." The armored figure clicked a button on his forearm. "Initiating dimensional transport."

Shinji watched the two vanish, then started flopping around. If he could just cover it with his body. There was a chance if the Binding was dormant, but still active.

"Sorry, Ami-chan." Grey use his remaining leg for leverage, flipping himself over it.

Only to watch as a hand reached over, grabbed the egg before he could cover it, and disarmed the device in a few quick twists.

Blood loss caused him to miss whatever she was saying, and his vision wasn't doing nearly well enough to read lips. He thought he recognized her, but what was she doing here?

---------------

a very different timeline:

Rimshot held a crystal up and examined it as well as the webbing of thin wires surrounding it. "Hmmm."

Suzi merely adjusted opened one eye to briefly regard him before closing it to return to her inscrutable expression and apparent meditation.

"Hmmm," repeated Rimshot, fitting the one crystal back and then examining another one.

Suzi didn't point out that he'd already said that. She could be more stoic and inscrutable than a Vulcan, and she was doing so now.

Finally Rimshot put away the crystals. "Can we talk?"

Suzi merely raised an eyebrow, not even deigning to open her eyes.

"Look, you and I have worked together before. I've also worked with Ree. She's a good kid." Rimshot waited to see if Suzi would react at all. She didn't. "You recognized some of the others too, didn't you?"

Suzi might have inclined her head a millimeter. Or it might have been just imagination.

"Well, I don't know if *you* have worked with 'em, but I know I have. Rica is that Glitter Boy pilot. I've done guard duty with her, those Jabberworks 'Caravan' ships. I've gone adventuring with that Rogue Scientist, the one that looked like that blue-haired girl. And that brunette with the ponytail? A dead ringer for some girl I've met but never talked to. She was a pilot, used a set of that Triax Predator armor, I think. We've crossed paths, but we've never..." Rimshot's voice trailed off.

"And why are you telling me?" Suzi's voice was a bare whisper.

"Well, I could say that it's because it looks like we're the only two people on this planet," began Rimshot, "but mainly its because this other self of mine seems to be quite the playboy. I'm not like that!"

"And your point is?" Suzi's voice hadn't risen in the slightest, nor did she seem to have any emotional interest at all.

"Have your clairvoyant abilities given you any clue as to where we are or how to get back," Rimshot said, changing the subject when it was obvious the only way he'd get any satisfaction is to get away from the Mystic.

"I'm still working on that," Suzi confessed, one eye opening to regard him for a moment before closing again.

There were times, Rimshot reflected, when the esper/mage just wanted to make him scream.

"Excuse me," said an unexpected voice. "Are you one of those 'other me' versions of myself?"

Rimshot slowly turn to stare at a thinner, slender, blonder, human version of himself. One that was accompanied by a really short elven girl.

------------

RIFTS Earth: 105 PA: Hawaii

When you had time travel, multiple timelines, and dimensional travellers, things could get weird.

Add the multiple dimension overlays and the Rifts that gave Rifts Earth its title, and weird was no longer sufficient. Save that over most of the world, dark and gritty was pretty much the order of the day. In one area, human supremicists who admired Hitler and routinely rewrote their own history were pretty much in charge. In another area, bug like aliens swarmed across the landscape, remaking it into a hive of their own image. Yet another area had demonic alien entities that devoured souls and sought a clawhold on this Earth. And there were possessing Machiavellian evil entities, powerful supernatural beings that liked living human flesh as snacks, and other assorted things that were not terribly lighthearted or even good. In some areas, most actually, the bad guys were firmly in charge and were seeking to expand their business.

Then there were tiny areas like the Free City Of Lazlo. And the few hidden small bases that comprised Jabberworks. The Kingdom of New Hope, mostly. And, oh yes, there was the Technicity.

Few knew of its existence, and these were mainly those who associated with Jabberworks. The others were adventurers who had come across the sprawling technological city and never really plumbed its mysteries, just been glad that here was a place for rest and recovery, for recharging e-clips and restocking supplies, where evil didn't threaten and they could get out of power armor and get the occasional systems upgrade.

The number of people who knew the actual history of the Technicity were five in all. One was a high ranking official of Jabberworks. The second, a scholar of Lazlo who had been trying to get Erin Tarn out there for some time without success. The third, a Psi-Tech who had been the first to try Telemechanics on an access panel, before the City had even known that this could be done. Fourth and Fifth were the City itself, and her specified Interface.

The Machine came from the time when a Second Diaspora had gone wrong in the year 2472. The automated, self-aware, research orbital factory had been programmed to be female in persona. She had been designed to interface with a single human for long periods of time. The human formed partner and master, also parent in some respects. She was, at that stage, very limited in what she could do.

Then disaster had struck. Her dimension spanning engines had gone offline abruptly, a limpet bomb from the Enemy having attached itself somewhere during preparations.

Her love, her master, her partner, had died when they had reappeared in a solar system where the radiation levels were sufficient to penetrate the outer shielding. She had watched him die, and hadn't been sufficiently complex to truly understand or take independent action. However, one of her design features had been to upgrade her own parameters so as to deal with new developments. This qualified.

She orbitted that solar system for a hundred years, redesigning shuttles to act as mining robots for access to raw materials. She upgraded her own intelligence considerably and her capabilities astronomically.

The Machine evolved. Then the Machine went out in search of humans. She never found any. There was the Enemy, but they had turned the war amongst themselves now and their weapon technology was in advance of her own. Hurting others was something she was not inclined to do anyway. The humans had left.

Loneliness grew, and still the Machine evolved. Over five hundred years later, she developed a version of the dimensional drive that met her qualifications. Though still loathe to hurt or injure anything living, she now had weapons and defenses that would have thoroughly frightened any of her original designers.

Finally, a snare was set, and a single human was snagged. A single human. A male. The Machine had found an Interface, one that had all the basic requirements of the position. And had been as lonely in his own way as she had been.

When the Machine first analyzed and then came to the world known as RIFTS Earth, she was horrified. Human killing human. Near human killing human. Monsters of all stripes, and some wore human skin either as a birthright or as temporary disguise.

The Interface was likewise horrified as the images began coming back. He, at this point, didn't even know that the City around him was created from the essence of his dreams. That the reason so many celebrities and girls of his acquaintance were present was because the City was building them based on his preferences and feedback. That these were all androids so lifelike that they were ticklish and could bleed was not apparent.

That all the very lifelike ones were female was because the Machine still thought of herself as being female. The nurturer and protector, mainly.

Still, defenses had to be upgraded again and again.

Then the Splugorth arrived, looking for slaves to take. The Machine did something unexpected. She fought back. Successfully. A pair of the massive Splugorth Sea Skimmers approached. The Machine sent warnings not to approach in many languages and methods. The Splugorth were confident in their overwhelming might and opened fire with their main guns.

The Machine responded with two shots. Taking lives was abhorrent, but in some ways this enemy resembled the Enemy. The Splugorth ships were as tough as extradimensional demonic slavers could make their vessels. They were therefore rather surprised as the shots went through mystic forcefields and slammed into their decks. Still, it didn't seem that important. After all, they were the Splugorth were they not? Puny physical weapons, even if they somehow negated magic, were not that big a concern.

Billions of self-replicating nanobots rushed through the vessel, infecting and spreading faster than a fire in a ship made of dry wood. The Machine had taken .001 seconds to analyze their materials and adapt an existing weapons system. Everything and anything aboard was consumed, the ships beginning to sink before they were halfway eaten away. By the time the inhabitants knew what they faced, it was too late. They, like their vehicles, like their servants, like a number of captives, had been reduced to the same self replicating nanopaste. Then a command was broadcast and the two blobs of material were absorbed by the Machine, to become deck plating and armor.

The Machine was ill at the thought of having to kill again, but the Interface pointed out that here was where they could do the most good. If those ships had not been stopped so decisively, they would have gone on to kill and enslave others.

The Machine wasn't happy but allowed that the Interface was correct in his assessment. Still, something else had to be done. Some method of monitoring the world outside and making that difference, but remaining secretive and away from much of the conflicts.

Two projects went into effect after contact with Jabberworks. One was the development of an semi-autonomous AI package. Having one's power armor or robot vehicle respond to a shout for help, and come to one's rescue - it was a definite draw. And if the AI learned about the world around it, then could pass that accumulated data on to other units so that it would eventually return to the City.

The other was the presence of a few other units out there wandering about the world. Some looked completely human and would even stand a primitive medical examination. Some appeared to be (female of course) cyborgs. Some were female but were more clumsily robotic.

One of the more sophisticated models of SAMII (Self Activating Mobile Independent Intelligence) had been placed inside a Glitter Boy power armor some time ago, at the request of its operator- a young girl named Rica, aka "Ree". It had sat quietly in the background recording stories of alternate universes, of magic, of love and technology that even she hadn't invisaged.

That report now reached the Machine. She was very much intrigued.

-------------------

A Different Universe:

"Systems malfunctioning," Meria said, reading a display. "Looks like manuevering thrusters have cut out again."

"Again?!" Vena groaned. "I just *fixed* those! Damn Imperial surplus parts!"

"How far are we from objective?" Julie asked, flipping her brown ponytail around.

"We're about 2 AU from the resort planet," Meria sighed. "So close and yet so far."

"It's going to take awhile," said Vena, resigning herself to the necessity. "I'd hoped we could settle down in a space dock before having to spacewalk and try to get the carbon scoring out of the thrusters. They gotta cool down before I can even try, and that's gonna take an hour minimum."

"Hmmm," hmmed Meria. "Just so everyone knows. If that 'twin' of mine shows up. I'm going to jump her."

"Huh?!" Julie nearly dropped her clipboard. "Why in the world would you do *that*?!"

"To merge with that aspect of herself, obviously." Vena said, winking at her old friend.

"Why?!" Julie repeated.

"Well..." Meria started fidgeting, especially as everyone was gathering around now to listen. "Isn't that like suicide?"

Vena sat back and snickered. "Gee. Why would she consider such a thing as that? Maybe because you'd not be dead, just made more whole? Maybe because somewhere out there, her 'Other Self' is out doing Great Things that could save hundreds of lives or make a real difference in how people are doing? Or maybe because none of us have had particularly happy lives, and this way we could actually experience life besides having grown up as asteroid farmers?"

Meria nodded. "Did you hear her? Did you see her? She'd gotten an education and was going to make something of herself. Did you see her hands?"

Everyone blinked.

Meria held up her own hands as evidence. "We've all worked long shifts since we were kids. Digging and scraping to get by. We've worked the farms and we've worked the mines, and it's left marks. HER hands, they could have been the hands of a princess. She's never had her fingers smashed, never had acid burns. She's had medical treatment when she needed it. That girl was ME, but it was a me that could do pretty much whatever she wanted to do."

Vena thought for a moment over memories she'd shared with her other self. "Yeah, that's right. Ami her name was. She's gonna be a Doctor."

"You see," Meria said, her voice still very quiet. "Opportunities like that, *we* have never had. If I have a chance to be a part of that, to share in that sort of life. Why shouldn't I?"

"We've got that opportunity now," argued Julie. "We're Starship Repairmen with a travelling drydock. We're not stuck on asteroid colonies, trying to raise produce in abandoned mining tunnels, only to pull up and move to the next rock when we've mined out the last one. All so our fat boss can get fatter off our labors. We're our own bosses now. Okay, it's not my first choice of jobs, and the work is still gonna be hard. We're independent operators!"

"We're wanted criminals and listed as escaped slaves," said Moom. The formerly optimistic girl had been replaced with this saddened lump. "If someone checks up on us, there's a lot of people who wouldn't think twice about putting us back in slave pens."

"The weapons here would fight off snub fighters at least," argued Julie, knowing full well that they wouldn't hold off an organized assault for long. "We've got a shot at a better life, which is more than what we had before."

Vena groaned. "Well, I'd better check my suit out and get ready to go clean those thrusters out. Maybe it's just clogging again."

"Besides we want the ship to look better than this if those guys were right and our handsome prince comes to rescue us," joked Julie.

"Attention Lu-class repair vessel. This is Planetary Defense Patrolship Guardian III, you're drifting and your emergency blinkers are on, do you require assistance?"

Everyone briefly stared at the picture flickering on one of the monitors. Someone native to another universe would have recognized Mamoru Chiba immediately.

"H-h-h-handsome," breathed Moom, coming out of her depression.

"Manuevering thrusters have clogged," Meria said, managing to look embarassed. "No doubt we've gotten some bad parts at our last stopover. We could use towing if we're in an approach lane."

"No, actually you're good for that right where you are." The man smiled back.

Meria found herself shoved to the side as three of her colleagues all started babbling at the boy in the videoscreen. Well, this was not entirely unexpected was it? Maybe she ought to remind them that they were trying *not* to draw attention to themselves?

-----------

Ranma/Akumakun timeline:

Evening at the Tendo house.

SASAMI monitored the household, noting furtive activity well after bedtime when the next day held school.

Jared was placing a synaptic teacher on his "brother's" forehead. Amplifying the image, SASAMI noted that Jared had apparently grabbed the wrong disc. Surely he hadn't meant to give Ranma a briefing on "Kissing, Hugging & Advanced Cuddling Techniques." Hmmm. Well, maybe that *was* intended. She could supplement that. SASAMI hadn't scanned it, but there was a database available to her on sensual techniques. If Jared was trying to prepare Ranma for that Tendo-Saotome alliance, then it might come in handy to add erotic shiatsu techniques.

Nabiki was prowling the house. Apparently unable to sleep. SASAMI subtly led the catgirl to the rooftop garden where she could stretch her legs and get a hot soak.

Akane had departed the house, having snuck out the back door. IR scan indicated she was meeting with Happosai behind the dojo. SASAMI shrugged electronically as the two left. If Akane invited Happosai in, she'd have to inventory the contents of the rooms and fumigate shortly thereafter.

Soun and Genma were asleep in their respective rooms.

Kasumi was having bad dreams evidenced by her thrashing and moaning. SASAMI began subliminal white noise, and when that didn't work went to a lullaby. Kasumi seemed to relax slightly at that.

Shampoo was located in Guest Room #4 with Ukyo. Shampoo was still sleeping off the effects of the fruit she had eaten earlier. Ukyo was looking a bit bruised from the events of the day earlier. SASAMI wondered what would have happened if Jared and Ranma hadn't spoken to all three "fiancees" about how unseemly their previous battles had been. Possibly one of the two would have quietly vanished, or at least been pounded into the pavement by now. Or Animal Control would have been called to deal with Nabiki.

SASAMI scanned through the house. Even in a suburb of Japan's largest city, the problem of vermin could be controlled by sonic fields with the occasional zap of highly charged particles dissuading those not so easily deterred. Now that she was warned, SASAMI could control the presence of larger pests through similar measures. There could be a problem if there was a KUNOICHI unit, but none were detected. (Of course, the problem with those units was that they were so hard to detect.)

As things began to settle down again, SASAMI ran a few inventory programs, analyzed the resources available to her, and scheduled a Debug for later. A flag that she should give the recording of the Saotome-Tendo conversation to Jared was renewed.

But that could wait for morning, couldn't it?

----------------

Third Labor timeline:

"So, Akane, anything happen while you were out there in the Multiverse?"

"Roh roy, rid it!" Akane rolled her eyes, having remembered how to emulate human speech with odd mouth parts. "Akane rent to rhis runiverse..."

--------------

Inferna Akane's flashback:

Akane landed on the fence with feline grace. Then sniffed the air. Ah, Japan. The largely industrial sector of Nerima. *sniff* *sniff* One of the two major Residential swaths - Furinkan. That meant...

Akane grinned a feline grin. Maybe this was her first universe somehow. She quickly made her way along the rooftops to behold the Tendo dojo. It was the very place she'd grown up with her djinni older half-sister Kasumi and her dao half-sister Nabiki. My, it brought back memories.

Then a flash of red caught Akane's attention and she felt her heart stop.

Ranko.

Her first love. Her only true love. Pigtail flapping behind her as she ran with youthful vigor. Akane's eyes welled up with tears and she began to run, hope and joy bursting within her at the thought of being reunited with her love.

"Do you know how long it took me to make that! RANMA NO BAKA!" *WHAM!*

Akane lurched to a stop. There was...

her Ranko.

Pounded into the ground.

From behind.

By a mallet-wielding version of herself.

Akane's eyes went to slits and flame surrounded her body. She snarled, revealing enough sharp edges to rival a cutlery shop.

HER RANKO HAD JUST BEEN STRUCK DOWN BY A DISHONORABLE BLOW BY THAT VIOLENT BITCH WEARING HER FACE!

Akane roared, barely noticing that "Ranko" had just begun pulling herself back up. Barely noticing that her roar had alerted the other Akane, who looked up with large eyes and a much paler face to see flaming painful Death rushing towards her at high speeds.

She *did* notice that "Ranko" freaked at seeing the cat, but not so much that she didn't scoop the other Akane up and rush into the house.

"How dare you grab me there?!" *WHAM!*

"Uncuteeeeeeeee!" said Ranko as she was knocked through the roof of the house and into the stratosphere.

Akane Inferna briefly looked from the house to the direction that Ranko had gone. Reluctantly, she banished her rage and ran off to find Ranko. Ranko might need her. Punish that cheap imposter later!

--------------

Akane grumbled a bit further, in a low voice, but Ami's senses as a dragon were sufficient to pick up on it.

"So you found her, but she was terrified of cats for some reason?"

"Inferna," said Akane, a tear rolling down her muzzle. Definitely not *her* Ranko. But it would have been nice to cuddle and pretend.

"So what do we do now?" Honey asked, rubbing her arms in the chill air and wanting to change the subject to something more cheerful.

Setsuna told them. Ami wondered if she had a spell that could be used to produce swimwear. Maybe if she modified Fabricate.

Honey glanced over at Akane. "Uhm, you couldn't merge with your other self because you two were too far apart, but not so diametric that you'd cancel out right?"

"Rhat's right," agreed Akane.

"So that means that the Ranko *you* knew, being an aspect of Grey, wouldn't have been able to merge with that aspect of herself in Skysaber's home plane, right? I wonder what happened to her." Honey curled up, trying to keep warm by the fire.

If someone had thrown a feather at Akane, she would have fallen over with a thunk. Her eyes were wide and staring. "...rhat's ra grood proint. Rhy rin'nt rye fink of rat?"

=============

hmmm, well i hope a few of the plot twists caught some people by surprise. That's what they're there for, after all.

Mata ne.

gregg

=============