Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction ❯ Aurora of Rainbow Fire ❯ Learning to Fly part A. ( Chapter 10 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

The story arc Aurora of Rainbow Fire is part two of an
ongoing series called The Odd Man Out. All current parts can be
found at http://members.tripod.com/fanservicelimited/index.html




Aurora of Rainbow Fire chapter seven: Learning to Fly part
a.

A Tenchi Muyo TV series lemon comedy by Nugar.
Email the author at nugarthebarbarian@yahoo.com with any
comments.
All Tenchi Muyo characters and situations copyright their
creators, Hiroki Hayashi and Masaki Kajishima, and AiC and
Pioneer and are used without permission. All other characters
and situations are owned by a whole lot of various people. This
is a nonprofit work only.









"Well, that's it, then," Kiyone said, looking around the
apartment and slinging one final bag over her shoulders.

"We're finished here?" Mihoshi asked, also carrying several
bags.

"Yes. Let us go."


****************


"Wow, I've never been to the Galaxy Police Headquarters,"
Sasami enthused, looking all around. "It's so much different
from Jurian stations."

The Galaxy Police Headquarters was a huge space station
roughly the size of the Earth's moon, but built entirely from
gleaming metals. Huge rings had been stacked on top of each
other, each connected to the rest in a seemingly haphazard
manner. The top and bottom were also connected to each other by
a long bridge that bowed out into space away from the main body,
resembling nothing so much as a giant cup handle. The gargantuan
station housed tens of millions of people at any given point, and
devoted much of its huge surface area to ship construction,
maintenance, and storage. The rest was devoted to its massive
communications equipment, personnel training and housing,
defense, and its own set of massive star drives. Even as its
ships patrolled this galaxy and one neighboring one, so did it,
albeit at a slower, less methodical pace with frequent extended
stops. The Galaxy Police enforced the peace, violently if need
be, and was the single most powerful organization within the
surrounding ten galaxies. If circumstances demanded it, it could
call upon the armadas of any of the empires within its
jurisdiction to put another wayward empire back in its place.
Even the powerful empire of Jurai would hesitate to go against
the official policies of the GP.

On a local level, however, the GP had far less influence,
and generally enforced whatever laws were present in a given
region of space. The political intricacies involved when the GP
had to request assistance from another empire, or vice versa,
were so complex that they took up the full time of many of the
greatest minds of the galaxy, which was probably a good thing
given how easy it would actually be to blow up the universe. The
last thing anyone needed was for geniuses like that to have time
on their hands.

Washu would have sneezed, but, well, she was somewhat
unable.

The thing that made Sasami coo in awe was the nature of the
construction, because it was assembled. Jurians grew their ships
and stations from the giant Jurian space trees, making minimal
use of gleaming steel and plastic. Indeed, many Jurians had a
phobia of being in such stark confines, but it wasn't a problem
for Sasami.

"Ah, I haven't been back in ever so long," Mihoshi
enthused, waving happily to everyone she saw despite the fact
that she had no idea who any of them were.

"Well, you've been stuck on Earth for about five or six
months," Kiyone reminded her. "Be thankful we got this
assignment. Escorting Sasami around is way better than busting
small time crooks out in the middle of nowhere."

"I forget, why did we come back?" Mihoshi wondered aloud.
"I thought we were just going to go on to Jurai."

"Maintenance, Mihoshi, maintenance. Yagami needs a refit
and restock, not to mention fuel." Inwardly, Kiyone exulted. (I
get to escort a Jurian princess around! And Detective-Sergeant
asked to see me! I just know there's going to be some sort of
political intrigue going on, maybe a kidnapping threat! If I can
do this job properly, my promotion is in the bag!)

"Ano, Kiyone? Why are you laughing like that?" Mihoshi
asked innocently.

"Yeah, Kiyone, you're starting to creep me out," Sasami
agreed.

Blushing in embarrassment, Kiyone assured them that it was
nothing. "Hey, is anyone else hungry?" she asked, attempting to
change the subject.

Predictably enough, Mihoshi exclaimed, "Ooh, I am!"

"Well then, let's get over to the cafeteria. You two can
eat while I go meet with the boss-man."

Both Sasami and Mihoshi nodded happily, and they trekked
off.

After getting them settled down with some food, Kiyone
hastened to her appointment with her superior. Not for the first
time, she was extremely happy to be back in civilization. Not
only did both she and Mihoshi have real money, and plenty of it
thanks to their accumulated pay while on Earth assignment, their
meals were free. While Sasami didn't eat enough to keep a Jurian
space tree alive, Mihoshi could inhale enough for a squad and
contributed heavily to their tight budget on Earth. Here, it
just didn't matter.

Kiyone looked around happily, scanning the crowds for
people she knew. She was just passing by a coffee bar when a
young woman about her age stood up.

"Mitzuki," Kiyone exclaimed. "Is that you?" she asked,
examining her old classmate. She had changed her hair, going
with a fixed style that kept her hair wound tight against her
head, indicating that she had probably spent a fair amount of
time in zero-g lately. But the rest was pure Mitzuki: narrow
face, slender hands, and lithe body.

"Kiyone! Long time no see! How are things going?" chirped
the other girl brightly, clutching her cup of steaming brew in
one hand and giving Kiyone a one armed hug.

"Oh, pretty well," Kiyone replied happily. "Just glad to
be back. How is everyone?" Knowing that it was likely to be a
lengthy report, she glanced at her watch to see how much time she
had before her appointment. "Tell you what, I've got a meeting
with the Detective-Sergeant in about fifteen minutes. Care to
walk with me and bring me up to speed?"

"Sure!"

They walked along for a while, winding their way through
the three dimensional maze that made up the central plaza.
Kiyone found herself getting more and more depressed as Mitzuki
rambled on about this or that classmate who had received, in
Mitzuki's words, 'yet another promotion.' Mitzuki was doing
quite well herself, having just jumped in rank and was expecting
a post in the Special Investigation Unit quite soon.

Then, as things do, talk turned to Kiyone's career.

"And how about you and Mihoshi, Kiyone?" Mitzuki asked. "I
heard about your assignment to that little backwater planet,
what's it called?" She looked over, a smug little smile on her
lips.

"Earth," Kiyone supplied glumly.

"Anyway, that's too bad. But you seem to be doing pretty
good, I mean, we all thought that they were either going to fire
you or leave you out there until you retired. You really must
have pissed off one of the higher ups, didn't you?"

Kiyone just tightened her expression and shrugged
noncommittally.

"So, what brings you back to headquarters? That general
ship refit they put out?"

Kiyone bit her tongue to keep from lashing out at the snide
little bitch, then abruptly relaxed. She had an Idea with a
capital I. "Oh, the same thing that caused us to be assigned to
Earth in the first place," she said casually.

Mitzuki took the bait. "So, what was that?"

(Heh. Best to approach this in a roundabout way,) Kiyone
thought smugly. "Tell me, do you still read those _awful_ cheap
tabloids in your time off?"

Mitzuki blushed and nodded, having hoped that everyone had
forgotten about her vice. It was just one more strike against
Kiyone that she had the bad taste and manners to bring it up.

"Well, you know how you used to always read those
'articles', and I use the term loosely, about the Jurian
royalty?" Kiyone asked pointedly, enjoying the other woman's
discomfort.

"Yeah. So," she replied curtly. "What's this got to do
with your assignment? You gonna be a tabloid detective now,
Kiyone?" (Haha! Take that, bitch!)

Kiyone's eye twitched, once, but she rallied back. "Well,
what two members of the Jurian royalty haven't they been talking
about lately?" She already knew this because Mihoshi had an
account forward them to Yagami, and was always talking about it,
even to the point of wondering aloud what those two missing
princesses were up to after a single story had raised the
question and implied an orgy of sex, violence, and drugs with the
locals of some backwater planet. Apparently, she hadn't made the
connection.

Mitzuki shrugged.

"Think about it. Even the Emperor shows up at least once a
month, with yet another story claiming 'proof' of his sexual
preference, one way or the other." She paused, then decided to
answer her own question. "The two crown princesses, that's who,
silly," she said in the same tone one would use to address a
moronic child. "And did you ever wonder why that is? Well,
maybe it was because no one could find them, being on a little
backwater world no one has ever heard of." She grinned in
triumph.

Mitzuki gasped. "_You_ got assigned to protect the
princesses?! So what are you doing back here?"

Kiyone glanced around, then leaned close with one finger on
her lips and placed one finger on Mitzuki's lips. "Well, this is
strictly hush hush, you know, but the two princesses are going
home for a counsel session with her parents. Princess Ayeka can
take care of herself, and has her new, ah, escort," she said,
winking twice and nudging the other woman in the ribs. "But
Princess Sasami wished to remain on Earth for a little while
longer for reasons of her own. We have _earned_ the honor of
being her escort back to Jurai. Both of the princesses asked for
us personally." (Hah! Hah!)

Mitzuki's mouth gaped as Kiyone wrapped an arm around her
shoulders, dragging her along forcefully. "Y-y-y-you? But why
the Galaxy Police at all?"

"Shhh, that's _very_ hush hush." Kiyone winked and pointed
one finger upwards in an easily understood gesture that meant the
higher ups. In other words, it's political, little girl, you're
in over your head. Why don't you go scrape that gum off your
shoe and bust a few jaywalkers?

Kiyone patted her on the head condescendingly, and gave her
one last insincere hug. "It's been good to see you again, and be
sure to say hi to everyone for me. Now, I'd best hurry or I'll
be late for my Important Meeting." She turned and walked away,
the air of important dignity hanging in the air around her like
cigar smoke.

And both, as they parted ways, had the exact same opinion
of each other.

(Stuck-up bitch!)


Before entering the Detective-Sergeant's office Kiyone took
a small detour to the restroom to 'freshen up'. In actuality,
she wanted to splash her face and climb down off her high horse.
She knew the Detective-Sergeant, and the last thing she, a lowly
first class detective recently back from assignment to some
backwater planet no one had ever heard of, wanted to do was act
like she was better than anyone else.

Mitzuki was an exception because she really was better than
that brown-nosing bureaucrat.

The extra time she took was worth it, as it allowed her to
present an honest, respectful face on when she actually met with
her superior.

"Ah, come in. Have a seat Detective... Kiyone," he said,
looking up from where he had just requested her name from the
database.

"Thank you, Sir." She bowed and took a seat in front of
his desk, hiding her disappointment over having had her name
looked up. She wasn't even important enough to remember when he
had a meeting scheduled with her.

"Now, Kiyone, I understand that both Princess Ayeka and her
younger sister Princess Sasami asked you to accompany Princess
Sasami from Earth to her parent's estate on planet Jurai."

"That is correct, sir." She nodded.

"Good. And that is exactly what you will do. Ordinarily
we don't assign detectives as chauffeurs for little girls, but we
are certainly prepared to make an exception this time."

"I had hoped so, sir. Neither my partner or I wish to
disappoint the Princesses of Jurai."

"Quite right. Quite right. I understand that they speak
highly of you two, the Princess Sasami in particular."

Kiyone dropped her eyes and studied her hands. "I am
honored by their praise, Sir."

"Yes," he replied dryly, bringing up a report. "As it says
here in Princess Sasami's own words," and here he dropped his
voice into a passable imitation of a little girl's voice,
"'They're _sooo_ funny, I love to watch them try to catch the bad
guys. Even Ryoko,' that's the dread space pirate Ryoko who has
yet to be captured, as you well know, 'says that they're more fun
to watch than 'Galaxy Police in Black'.'," he said, referring to
a popular and long running show that portrayed the Galaxy Police
as bumbling, incompetent idiots who nevertheless managed to save
the day, at least until the next episode.

Kiyone blushed and studied her hands. "Princess Sasami has
such a gifted way with words, Sir."

"Indeed." He paused and looked intently at her, giving her
time to squirm as only an experienced commanding officer could.
"Anyway, relations with Jurai have been touchy of late; we
currently owe them more favors than they owe us. Jurai being the
most powerful single empire under our jurisdiction, and the first
to come when we request assistance, it has been deemed prudent
that we accommodate the two princesses' wishes. Who are we do
deny Princess Sasami her entertainment?"

"Who are we, indeed," Kiyone agreed weakly.

"It goes without saying that if anything should happen to
the young princess while she is in your care..." He let the
sentence trail off.

"Nosir, no need to say anything. I understand perfectly."

"Good." His expression softened and he projected a more
relaxed attitude. "However, as two of the most important members
of the Jurai royal family are leaving Earth, there probably won't
be any pressing need to put two fine, capable officers on that
remote post. We'll see about a transfer, pending a good review,
of course."

Kiyone brightened. "Of course, Sir, you can count on us,
Sir. And Sir, um, could you maybe review my request for a new
partner?"

"I will certainly look into it. Any questions?"

"Um, yes, Sir. Are there any other circumstances I should
be aware of?" she asked hopefully.

"Circumstances? What sort of circumstances?" her superior
asked pointedly, sitting up and leaning forward, bearing down on
the hapless detective in front of him.

"Oh, you know, kidnapping threats, civil unrest, troubles
with another empire?" (Come on, there's got to be _something_,)
she thought.

"No..." he replied, clearly uncomfortable with such a line
of questioning. "Just what are you getting at, Detective?"

"Ah, nothing, Sir. Just wanting to know if there is any
indication of a problem my partner and I might face in our
mission."

"Detective, this isn't a gritty police drama. Concentrate
on your duty, not your aspirations as a hero."

"Yessir, I will, Sir."

"Good. Dismissed."


****************


"The Princess Sasami?!" the man hissed into the audio only
communications gear. "Here? Now?" He paused, listening
carefully to the rest of the information. "Yes. The agreed on
price? Excellent. I'll get right on it."


****************


"Hey, there's Kiyone!" Mihoshi said brightly, waving as
high as she could to be seen.

"I see her!" Sasami replied, jumping and waving as well.
She was rewarded when the dark-haired detective noticed them and
started their way. Sasami, ever observant of other's emotional
conditions, remarked on her dour expression. "Kiyone looks down,
don't you think, Mihoshi?"

"Huh?" Mihoshi asked, lowering her hand and looking at her
charge. She looked back up at her partner, then clasped her
hands together. "Oh, I think you're right. She does look sad."

When asked, Kiyone shook her head dismissively. "I'm fine,
don't worry about it. How was lunch?"

"Good," Sasami replied.

"Are you hungry, Kiyone?" Mihoshi asked.

Kiyone shook her head. "No, I'm fine. I'll get a cup of
coffee, though. Hey, why don't we show Sasami around
headquarters? We've got some time."

"That sounds like fun, I've never been here before. It's
very big, for a made place." Sasami toed the hard metal floor.

Mihoshi nodded at her, following Kiyone as she led the way
to the nearest coffee bar. "Headquarters is the biggest
artificial planetoid in this galaxy. It's so big, in fact, that
we don't even really need the gravity generators to stay on the
ground."

"There was that synthetic solar system the Syanellians had
up until about eight centuries ago," Kiyone mentioned as she
signaled an employee. "That was bigger, although I guess you're
right about this being the biggest planetoid. Their system was
just a bunch of planets and a sun held together."

"Syanellians? Who were they?" Sasami asked.

Kiyone glanced back as she was paying for her coffee. "You
mean you've never heard about them? That's strange. But I guess
you would later on in school."

"The Syanellians were a race of powerful humanoids from
another galaxy who built a big, mobile solar system," Mihoshi
explained. "They traveled around and raided other species
empires for supplies. They showed up on the other side of our
galaxy about eleven-hundred and thirty-two years ago, and started
attacking everyone in sight. It was the second to last major
war, and the Galaxy Police fought most of it. It lasted three
hundred years until they were wiped out by Empress Raikori."

Kiyone took a long drink of her fragrant coffee and sighed
before nodding. "Yes, like I said, up until about eight hundred
years ago." Once again, she took the lead and guided them all
over to a clear elevator, taking another long drink as she did
so. She hadn't had Jamariquoian Blue since well before her trip
to Earth. "Let's go up north and work our way down from there."

"Ooh!" Mihoshi exclaimed as they entered the clear tube and
stood on a glowing disk of energy. "Can we stop by the rec-park?
They're due to be finished with the new Twista-Hurl ride!"

Kiyone winced. "Uh, we'll go through, but if we want to
have time to see the sights we can't stay for the rides." She
gave Sasami a pleading look.

Sasami smiled knowingly. "Yeah, let's hurry! I don't want
to miss anything!"

"Aww-" Mihoshi's reply was cut off as the disk
disappeared, taking them with it.


Two hours later, they had toured the northern residential
levels and were well on their way south, toward what might be
considered the bottom of the giant installation if top and bottom
had any real meaning in space. It was towards the engines, power
plants, and ship docks, and since everything had been built in a
linear fashion to take advantage of the acceleration supplied by
the engines, the word 'bottom' was as good as any.

The upper middle levels were where most of the GP desk jobs
took place, as well as a large central level devoted to one of
several GP Academies. Their tour didn't tarry long there, as
most of it was off-limits without permission and Sasami didn't
want to raise a fuss.

The real delight of the day, at least for Kiyone, was when
they finally got to stop by the shipyard and see her beloved
Yagami.

They stopped in front of a large armor-glass window running
the length of the corridor. The other side was mostly vacuum,
though there was a bit of escaped atmosphere from the ships that
lined the inside of the incredibly huge cavern that served as the
shipyard. On the opposite wall and a few degrees up, the Yagami
sat motionless, gleaming in the bright light that filled the
inside. Although crew and robots crawled over other ships in the
hangar, none were attending to Yagami, indicating that the refit
was complete.

"They repainted it!" Kiyone exclaimed delightedly, staring
at her now gleaming red ship.

"And the equipment restocked, the combat suits replaced,
supplies replenished, air recyclers upgraded, the engines
replaced..." Mihoshi added, glancing up from where she was
leafing through a report they had picked up at the dock office.

"They repainted it!" Kiyone exclaimed, grabbing Sasami and
pointing at the ship in case she had missed it.

"...the airlock fixed, the decking refurbished..."

"You don't understand!" Kiyone insisted, lightly shaking
the little princess. "They _repainted_ it! They _never_ repaint
on a general refit!"

"The library updated, the memory expanded, and oh, look!"
she cried, jabbing her finger at one line and turning it towards
the others. "We've been selected to beta test one of those new
Sirus Cybernetics Advanced Personality Substitute AI modules!"

"The paint! Oh, how it gleams!"

Sasami gently tugged a now forgotten and nearly empty Ocean
o' Coffee cup out of Kiyone's shaking hand and threw it in a
nearby waste receptacle. "I know," she said, patting her
chaperone's hand. "It's very pretty."

"Oh, I've never met one of those," Mihoshi added. "I can't
wait to meet it! I wonder if it'll like us?"

A huge ball of fire and flying debris exploded out from
where the newly installed engines were a second previous.

"MY BABY!" Kiyone screeched.

Mihoshi's head jumped up and she stared in shock with the
other two as alarms and lights went off, containment crews
rushing to attend the wounded ship. "Oh, no!" she cried
suddenly, glancing worriedly at her partner. "The new paint
job!"

Kiyone gave her a look of startled disbelief edging toward
righteous fury. "To hell with the paint job! What about my
ship?!"

A second, smaller explosion lit the hangar, sending work
robots spinning backwards before containment fields enveloped
both them and the pieces of Yagami. One hyperdrive engine
floated motionless several lengths from the ship it had become
separated from.

It was like watching the death of a puppy.

The next hour passed in a blur for Sasami, as they checked
in with the dock office and patiently listened to several
explanations, mostly involving improper couplings and crossed
wires, but which really amounted to 'We won't know why your ship
committed suicide until we salvage the brain module and send it
to the Sirus service psychiatrist, who is heavily backlogged
right now and it could be a while.'

What really disturbed the Juraian princess was Kiyone's
reaction to the incident. Although she seemed shocked at first,
soon she started to grin unaccountably as she badgered and
threatened the harassed dock master for the details.

"So, what do we do now?" Mihoshi asked. They all sat at a
table in one of the better cafeterias they liked to frequent in
the lowest residential level. She nibbled idly at a plate of
unidentifiable bits of meat and vegetables covered in brown
sauce.

Kiyone ate heartily, having skipped lunch. She was nearly
finished with a bowl of rice and fish soup, and had already taken
several bites of a kind of pot pie served with slices of bread.
She poked the back of her chopsticks at a tasteful sign across
the causeway advertising transient lodgings. "We'll stay the
night here, and see about another ship in the morning. Repairs
on Yagami are going to take weeks, especially since we just got
moved to last in line and they practically have to rebuild the
entire aft section from scratch. We can probably requisition
another patrol ship."

Sasami nodded silently, eating her own beefbowl.

"Does this mean we have time to ride the Twista-Hurl?"
Mihoshi asked brightly.

Kiyone turned faintly green at the thought. "If you wish,
I guess. I, umm, I'll go requisition a ship while you two are at
the park."

"Yay!" Mihoshi cheered. "You'll like this," she assured
Sasami. "They give each person that rides a blanket meal ticket
good anywhere in the station for anything and all you can eat, as
long as you use it within an hour of the ride. It's their way of
refunding the meal you just lost on the ride."

"I don't suppose they spend much money buying meals for
their customers in that time, do they?" Sasami asked, frowning
when Mihoshi shook her head brightly. She dubiously pushed her
bowl toward the center of the table. "I guess I'm done, then,"
she added reluctantly.

"Let's get a room first, and I'll meet you back there when
I get back, okay?" Kiyone asked.

They nodded.

She finished a last bite of pie and set her chopsticks
down, wiping her lips with a napkin. "Well, let's go, then."


****************


Kiyone woke up grinning like a madwoman. Her suspicions
had been correct.

Oh, sure, it was entirely possible that the timing between
her ship spontaneously developing suicidal tendencies and her
assignment to escort the youngest Juraian Princess was
coincidental, but not very likely. This was intragalactic
politics, where one being's decision not to have coffee one
morning was the result of an action on the part of some super-
secret organization controlled by a government halfway across the
spiral arm.

Any way she looked at it, all the facts pointed to one
simple conclusion.

Some agency had an unwholesome interest in Sasami.

Who, though?

Her commander hadn't given her any indication that some
agency or agencies might have an agenda involving the princess.
While she generally accepted statements from on high at face
value, she knew that they had their own games of power politics
to play. More likely, they simply didn't know, but you could
never really tell.

Kiyone shrugged, happily contemplating the possibilities.
She would be every inch the detective when she went for the
meeting her superior had requested earlier.



"Detective Mabiki, no, don't have a seat," instructed the
man known simply as Detective-Sergeant. Presumably he had a
regular name as well, but equally presumably he occasionally left
his office. Kiyone had never heard of either, but it wasn't
polite, nor advisable, to pry.

"Sir!" she replied, standing at attention.

He noticed that and waved his hand irritably. "No, relax,
relax. This won't take long. As your ship has been disabled in
the accident in the docks, you will, of course, be forced to find
other transportation."

Was it Kiyone's imagination or did she hear single quotes
around the word 'accident'?

"This isn't official Galaxy Police business, so I'm afraid
I can't provide you with another ship as per your request," he
said, although his tone didn't sound very regretful. "However,
and I think you'll find this much more, ah, suitable, for the
young princess, you will be provided with an ample expense
account and given a pass for one of the civilian transport ships
currently shuttling between headquarters and the planet Waldow."
He paused and slid a fat plastic envelop across the desk. "I
checked the dock listings there and found a Juraian treeship
currently taking on passengers. It's a cruise starliner making
the rounds, and is quite suitable for our purposes. If you hurry
you can make the departure date."

He couldn't have spelled it out any clearer if he'd
actually spoken plainly.

"Sir! I will, Sir!" she replied stiffly, eyes alight with
joy.

"Yes, yes, very good. It's bound for the Ring, but you
should have no trouble making it to Jurai from there."

Of course not. The Forest Ring was Jurai's oldest,
closest, and most important colony world. And for some reason,
which she'd have to figure out herself, it was of vital
importance that she go there.

But why?

"Any questions, Detective?"

"No, Sir! I'll leave at once, Sir!"

He sighed, her eagerness was so blindingly obvious. "And
Detective?"

"Yes, Sir?"

"When you leave at once,"

"Sir?"

"Be sure you take the Princess with you."

"Sir!" Now what did he mean by that?

"Dismissed."


****************


"Come on, we've got a ship to catch!" Kiyone insisted,
frantically stuffing a wad of clothes into her partner's suitcase
before running back for more. For some strange reason, Mihoshi
had unpacked her entire wardrobe into the room's tiny lockers.

"Ano, Kiyone?" Mihoshi asked hesitantly from where she had
rudely been shoved to the side on the grounds that she wasn't
doing it fast enough. "I didn't have _everything_ in there..."

"Huh?" the dark haired girl replied distractedly between
grunts, jumping up and down on the hard-shelled suitcase to make
it close.

Finally, it make a loud *snick* as the latches caught, then
groaned a little as the sides strained.

"Ah, nevermind." Mihoshi knew her partner would calm down
eventually. And the truth was, she was impressed. To think,
she'd always just blindly believed in the old saying that you
couldn't put five pounds of rice into a three pound sack. Just
one more piece of evidence that showed that her partner was a
miracle worker.

Kiyone panted heavily, still standing on the suitcase.
Then, gingerly, with the same deliberate carefulness of someone
holding a cup full of ammonium triodide, she stepped off of the
suitcase, to the bed, and to the floor.

The suitcase held.

She dusted her hands off and made a mental note to direct
Mihoshi to the nearest laundromat later. "Now, Sasami?" she
asked, scanning the room.

"Uh, right here! And I'm all packed, too!" Sasami assured
her hastily.

"Good! We've got a transport to catch!"


Their trip to Waldow proved uneventful. Kiyone was as
nervous as a man standing in a suspiciously grand piano-shaped
shadow, and not all of it was due to the (to her) inordinately
lengthy time they had spent getting ready for departure. Her
eyes never stayed still, and she watched everything and everyone
around her as ardently as she had when she was lost in the jungle
and danger seemed to come from every angle.

They landed in the lone spaceport on the main continent of
planet Waldow. In fact, it was the sole spaceport the planet
had, period. As such, it was a large one, as it had to serve the
needs of the many cargo ships that came and went, many of which
were going right back to the Galaxy Police headquarters.

None of this brought comment or more than passive notice
from the three travelers, although Kiyone did briefly wonder if
the Waldowian government was out to get Sasami for some reason.
She didn't dismiss it, but rated it unlikely. For whatever
reason, it wasn't the planet that was important. They had to
board that ship!

"Slow down, Kiyone, please!" Sasami huffed, having been run
ragged trying to keep up with the speeding woman. She had been
running flat out, trying to match Kiyone's longer strides,
although Kiyone had at least been considerate enough to carry two
of Sasami's large suitcases in addition to her own. Mihoshi
carried the other big one and a satchel, leaving Sasami with only
a backpack.

"Oh, sorry, Sasami," she apologized, genuinely contrite.
"I'm being awfully inconsiderate of you. We'll stop at the next
refreshment fountain for a break."

"Good," Mihoshi said simply.

As it turned out, there was one right around the corner,
its cheerful primary colors advertising the presence of free
water, pure ethanol, and hydrochloric acid from fountains. They
checked carefully before they drank. Sometimes practical jokers
were known to switch the signs around.

The air filled with an awful groaning that seemed to come
from the depths of some great hell, perhaps from the Great
Sleeping One himself. Passerbys stopped and turned slow circles,
seeking the source of the unholy moan. Sasami and both of her
two chaperones looked around intently, self-consciously aware
that the sound was coming from near them. It was punctuated by a
staccato series of sharp pops that made everyone jump and hold
their breath, anxiously awaiting the next one.

All eyes turned as one, unerringly focusing on the
battered, tan hide of the bulging suitcase held in Mihoshi's now
trembling hand. Little blisters appeared on its naugahyde skin,
the hinges warped and squealed, and the seams strained ominously.
As much as everyone present would have liked to turn and run like
hell, no one was willing to risk vibrations that might set the
overstuffed time bomb off.

"We're all going to die," ventured one pessimistic soul.
Everyone's hearts sank.

"Don't. Move." Kiyone hissed in a whisper at her friend.
"Don't talk, don't nod, and if you have to breath, for our sakes
do it slowly!"

"Okay!" Mihoshi replied quickly, nodding.

The air filled with the hiss of indrawn breath... But the
moment passed.

Something inside the suitcase shifted, causing a three-
second harsh mechanical buzz which cut off abruptly. A few
seconds later, it started again, and shut off just as quickly.
With many fits and starts, as if a switch was right on the cusp
between on and off, something in Mihoshi's suitcase finally
managed to get turned on fully, setting up a grinding vibration
that resonated through the entire suitcase, through the handle,
and into Mihoshi's hand.

Kiyone and Mihoshi exchanged a glance, and Kiyone made a
vague pumping motion with her right hand. Mihoshi responded with
an embarrassed nod, and Kiyone put her hand over her face.

The words "Bomb! It's a bomb!" filtered in and out of the
crowd, along with various speculations about the afterlife,
death, and the probabilities of everyone's immediate demise.
Everyone stared at Mihoshi balefully.

"It's not my fault!" she whined in a dreadful, low whisper,
not even wiping at the tears coursing down her cheek for fear she
would move the suitcase slightly. "I didn't pack it!"

Kiyone took one slow, sliding step away from her partner
and whistled innocently.

"Kiyone!" Mihoshi whimpered.

A large bulge of stretched naugahyde appeared on the lid,
indicating that a major internal structure had weakened. Another
appeared on the side, and the hinges rattled loudly.

One woman screeched and fainted as the locks screamed
again, and the suitcase started to lose its suitcasey look. Now
it looked more like a balloon. A trembling, buzzing balloon that
was about to pop.

The tension mounted quickly. Something had to give, and
soon.

*POW*-*TINK* went the rightmost hinge pop-rivet as it broke
loose and bounced off the hard floor at nearly supersonic speeds.

"MY EYE!" screeched some random person.

The luggage was quieter, now, with only a low, muffled buzz
of some unknown device to fill the silence. The tension
released, the groans silenced, and the pressure subsided.

Everyone gave a collective sigh of relief.

"Whew!" Mihoshi said loudly, wiping a hand across her
forehead. "What a relief!"

The already-twisted-beyond-hope-of-repair latches chose
that moment to let go, allowing the lid to fall open and disgorge
a small mountain of frilly pink things, fluffy white things, lacy
red things, and one long, battery-operated naughty purple thing
which fell out squirming and vibrating across the floor. Mihoshi
hastily turned it off and shoved it underneath the bottom of the
pile, blushing furiously.

Several people in the crowd laughed cruelly, and she
blushed even more.

"Oh, great," Kiyone groaned. "More delays."

Try as they might, they couldn't get the suitcase to stay
shut again, even with most of the clothes removed. Other than a
few bored travelers, their audience dissipated quickly, leaving
them to their own devices.

Sasami piped up optimistically. "We're in a spaceport,
right? We don't have much farther to go, and there's got to be a
duty-free shop around here somewhere. Why don't you go get a big
bag or something?"

Kiyone hugged her. "That's a great idea, Sasami! I'll do
that! You stay here, I'll be right back."

True to her word, Kiyone was only gone a few minutes before
she returned with a cheap blue duffle bag trimmed in grey. At
two and a half feet long and a foot tall, it easily held all of
Mihoshi's clothes and very, very personal items. Unfortunately,
it was of such low quality the zippers stuck twice, and the
stitching on a bit of grey trim had came loose, letting it flap.

Mihoshi grabbed the strap and they were off once more.
Another wild run later, they arrived at the check-in station.
Kiyone flashed a card emblazoned with the GP logo and paid their
way on board. They were directed to a line of people waiting
entrance to the departure gate, there to wait patiently for the
next thirty minutes.

Both Sasami and Mihoshi gave Kiyone a series of baleful
glances.

"Hey, how was _I_ supposed to know that our flight would be
delayed?" Kiyone replied defensively.


****************


Nearby, two young aliens strolled casually towards their
next assignment. This wasn't an undercover assignment, nor did
it involve assassination, razzle-dazzle, or political intrigue.
Frankly, even the most desperate black-ops commander wouldn't
hire them for anything complicated, and they'd be the last choice
even for the simple stuff. They just weren't smart enough.

"I'm tellin' ya, Ura, this is our big break!" continued a
young guy with short red hair highlighted with a wide blond
streak. He had a punk rocker look to him, mostly because of his
piercings, a nosering and three earrings in his left ear, his
large, gaudy necklace, and his loose black pseudoleather clothes.
He shifted a large duffle bag, the pair's only luggage, from one
hand to the other.

The other, a blue-haired girl about the same age, shook her
head in disbelief as they walked. "Oh, come off it, Amaraba. I
don't care how fancy this ship is, we're not going to run into
any royalty trying to travel incognito, even if we are going to
the Forest Ring, first. Nobles have their own ships, you moron."

"Either way, this ship is gotta have hundreds of rich
people on it. I mean, who else could afford it? I'm tellin' ya,
all we gotta do is bow and scrape like they _was_ royalty and
we'll be gettin' big, fat tips." He made a mock-bow in her
direction. "We'll have enough money to BUY our own ship in no
time," Amaraba replied confidently.

Ura wavered. "You really think so?"

He gave her his best suave smile, which wasn't very.
"Trust me, babe. We're gonna hang with people of quality from
now on. Nobles, gangsters, you name it."

"All-right!" his girlfriend enthused. "You go, boy. Unh
huh, unh huh."

"Hey," he replied. "It's gotta beat washing dishes at that
crappy restaurant."

On this, Ura was in full agreement.

Amaraba paused to flourish their newly issued crewmember
cards at the gate. He loved playing the high roller, and Ura
seemed to appreciate it, too.

They moved through to the waiting line, ending up in
position just behind two women and a young girl who were talking.
The hall was wide enough for people to stand in line side by
side, and they ended up standing on the left side of a man in
nice casual clothes with a blue duffle bag at his feet.

Ura glanced to her right at Amaraba and gestured to the two
women ahead in line with the young girl between them.
"Daughter?" she mouthed with a grin.

He shrugged and dropped their bag on the floor, but as she
watched he made a V with each hand using the index and middle
fingers. Then he glanced at the two women and subtly placed his
hands together, interlocking the fingers so that the skin between
them on both hands ground together in a series of twists.

Ura broke up laughing and punched him in the arm.
"Amarabaaa," she drawled between giggles, "knock it off."

"Hey, you thought of it first," he said, laughing and
rubbing his shoulder.

"That's just gross," Ura replied indignantly, then laughed
again herself. They ignored the annoyed looks they were getting
from all the other people in the area.

Ura looked up when she noticed a light above the departure
gate blink on. It was a cool amber color, indicating that it
wasn't quite ready, but would be soon. "Hey, grab the bag, we're
about to move out."

Amaraba looked ahead at the wide line of people stirring in
anticipation of the impending gate activation, then crouched and
grabbed the handles of their duffle bag. It was no coincidence
that it put the rear ends of both the girls in front of him right
at eye level. Both of the lesbians were hot, and he used his
time on the floor to get a good look of their nice, firm asses.
The dark haired girl was wearing a skirt which showed off her
legs nicely, but the blonde's tight slacks gave him a better
show. When she moved, he could see the panty line through the
thin brown material, and it was apparently a very revealing
thong.

Then Ura, who was more aware of her boyfriend's habits than
she let on, backhanded him across the back of his head and
knocked him over into the man standing beside them.

He jumped back up with a hasty series of apologies, and not
all of them were to the man he had just fell into. He quickly
grabbed his duffle bag and moved over to stand close to Ura, who
was giving him one of her better glare-of-death's, but not nearly
as good as the one he was getting from the man. Anger had seeped
into the man's eyes, promising pain for the indignity put upon
him. Amaraba paled and stepped a little closer to his
girlfriend.

"Bastard," she hissed into his ear. "If you're going to
stare at some girl's ass, it had better be mine!"

Reflexively, his eyes dropped and shifted to her own rear,
which wasn't bad in the look's department either.

"Just for that, you're cut off," she continued in a
whisper.

Amaraba wilted accordingly. "Aww, I'm sorry, babe, it
won't happen again..." he whined.

"Hmph," she replied, crossing her arms and turning away.
"You're still cut off."

"You mean... No more fun?"

"Nope."

"No blowjobs?" he asked, the realization sinking in.

"Absolutely not."

"No sex?"

"Unh unh."

"No _hand_jobs?" he guessed.

"Hardly." She sniffed.

"But, but..."

"Butts got you into this mess," Ura replied coolly.

"I'll be good," he said in a dejected little boy voice.

"You'd better. I think that man wants to kick your ass."

Amaraba glanced over to find the man didn't seem to be
willing to let bygones be bygones, at least from the way he was
still glaring. "Shit, um, let's see if we can't squeeze by the
lesbians, alright?" he asked.

"So long as you don't try to feel a cop," she replied
nastily.

"Um, Ura, I think you mean 'cop a feel'," he hazarded.

"Whatever," she snapped. "You're not helping your case by
making fun of my sayings, you know."

"Right, right..."

With several apologies, they managed to squeeze between the
laden threesome and the wall, but found their advance blocked by
a solid wall of passengers. The amber light had been on several
minutes now, and they figured they only had a few more minutes to
wait, so they simply pressed in.

After five minutes, Ura commented on the delay. Amaraba
agreed.

After ten minutes, Amaraba sat the duffle bag down. The
girls beside them also sat much of their luggage down. Everyone
exchanged looks and shrugged.

Another five minutes passed, and the light blinked green.

"Finally!" someone in the crowd exclaimed, and there was
much murmured agreement.

Amaraba turned and bent over to grab their bag, and
accidentally bumped heads with the blonde girl who had mirrored
his actions exactly. "Ouch," he complained.

"Owwie," Mihoshi parroted. "Sorry about that, I should
watch what I'm doing," she said, amusement entering her voice.

"It's okay, I wasn't looking either," he replied without
thinking as he grabbed the handle of the duffle bag.

"'It's okay, I wasn't looking either'?" Ura asked in
disbelief.

Amaraba blinked. "Uhh, yeah, uh, watch what you're doing
next time, ya clums-*cough* *cough*" He trailed off, embarrassed
at having been polite to someone.

The line inched forward as two, then three, then five
people disappeared through the gate, just enough to give the rest
a little breathing room.

Then the light changed back to amber.

The crowd gave a great collective sigh of disappointment.
Those who had picked up their bags sat them down on the ground
again, including Mihoshi and Amaraba.

"Y'know," Ura commented quietly, "if this was really as
high class a ship as you keep saying it is, they'd have 'porters
out here taking our luggage."

"We're crew, babe," Amaraba said patiently, as if that
explained everything. "They don't send 'porters to pick up the
crew's own luggage. We have to get it ourselves."

"Oh." Ura accepted that easily enough. She knew there was
a flaw in that logic somewhere, but she just couldn't put her
finger on it.


Somewhere behind them, Sungi, the man Amaraba had fell
into, shifted impatiently and amused himself with private
thoughts of removing the clumsy little punk's privates. He
wasn't the type to forgive easily, and made a decision that if he
ever got a chance, the kid was going see a world of hurt. Even
if it was just an accident.

Caught up in his fantasizing, he missed seeing the kid and
the cute blonde bump heads. Even so, his eyes never left the
young pair, and he did see it when they sat their bags beside
down beside each other. He noticed this mainly because the bags
were exactly alike: blue with grey trim around the edges.

He glanced up as the light turned green again, then back to
the kid and the blonde. They both looked down and noticed that
their bags looked exactly alike. They said something, but he was
too far away to hear. Then, as he watched, they agreed to swap
bags. Sungi chuckled quietly to himself. He had been watching,
and knew full well which bag each had sat down, and they had just
gotten it confused and gave their own bag to the other.

A brief thought of telling them that they had switched
flitted through his mind, only to be squashed. Let them discover
the unhappy fact on their own. The kid deserved it, at the
least.

The line started moving forward again, so he picked up his
own duffle bag and moved along with it.

He didn't think about the fact that he, too, had a blue
duffle bag with grey trim.


****************


"You know, I think I'm glad that this bag was made so
shoddily," Mihoshi said idly as she sat it down on one of the
room's twin beds. She would have liked a suite, but they barely
managed to get a berth at all, so it would be just like their
vacation on Earth.

"Why's that?" Kiyone asked as she sat her own load down on
the other bed and helped Sasami put hers there as well.

"This torn place," Mihoshi replied, tugging lightly on it
before she opened it in search of a shirt she wanted. "When we
were standing in line, a guy sat one down just like it and we got
confused, but I recognized this torn spot and knew which one was
mine."

"Is it?" Kiyone asked, ever practical.

"Unh huh," Mihoshi replied, pulling out the shirt she had
been looking for. "Unless he has a wild side I didn't see in
public," she continued, holding up a pair of red panties
purchased on Earth.

Kiyone chuckled and Sasami giggled. "Maybe so." Abruptly
she turned serious. "Well, I'm going to go look around the ship.
Keep an eye on Sasami, Mihoshi. And be careful, Sasami. This
isn't Earth, you know.

"I know," Sasami said, and nodded.

A loud bong, like that from a gong, filled the ship,
indicating that lunch was served in the banquet hall, a common
Juraian custom.

"Good. I'll see you two in a few hours." Kiyone left the
room, the door dematerializing to a flat grey screen and
rematerializing after her.


****************


"Man, I wish we had time to kick back and relax before we
had to start work," Ura complained as Amaraba flashed his
crewmember card in front of the reader on their door. They both
walked in through the holographic screen as the wood obligingly
disappeared.

"Yeah, no foolin'," he agreed, tossing their duffle bag on
the tiny bed. They got extra pay if they shared one of the tiny
little rooms with a fellow crewmember, and they would have done
that anyway. "I heard this ship's got some nice bits. Maybe we
can use some of them when we get off duty."

Ura bobbed her head, making her large left earring dance
and sparkle. "Cool."

"The onsen, maybe, or the bar... Hey!" Amaraba exclaimed
as a happy thought occurred to him. "I think they've got one of
those new antigrav tingle-sense rooms! Those are supposed to be
really cool!"

"Wow, really? I always wanted to try one of those!"

He smiled. He knew she'd forget to be mad at him. She
always did. "Cool," he replied as they left for their
assignments.


****************


Sungi sighed as he carefully placed his own duffle bag on
the far side of his large, plush bed. Standard operating
proceedures would have him immediately leave for the recreation
hall and flirt with anything that moved, but his heart just
wasn't in it. So, for the moment, he sat slumped on the edge of
the bed, breathing deeply.

He always got nervous at the start of a mission, but it had
been getting worse these past few years. It wasn't that he was
having moral issues with his line of work, he didn't have morals.
It just seemed kind of pointless after a while. Once you
complete one job, another one would be waiting, thanks to the
ever-changing dynamics of the galaxy, and eventually his luck was
going to run out.

On a long enough time line, everyone's chances of survival
drops to zero.

Giving one more great sigh, he stood up and walked out the
door. As much as he'd like to spend the trip locked in his
cabin, people tended to get suspicious if you didn't try to blend
in.


****************


"This is a really pretty ship," Sasami commented as they
walked through the cavernous wooden hallways leading from section
to section. "It's a lot bigger than mine was."

Mihoshi nodded in agreement, peering around at the exits
leading to bathrooms, cabins, and other hallways. "This is a
Class L Jurai civilian transport, or, as my old professor used to
call them, a really big free-fall tree. It's even bigger than
Yagami."

"I don't know what the Yagami was," replied a woman's voice
behind them, "but you are correct. The Dinu-oh is one point five
kilometers long and three-quarters of a kilometer in diameter."

They both turned quickly to see the newcomer. She was
tall, dressed in a formal but very low-cut cocktail dress slit
high up the side. She bowed very low in Sasami's direction.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Princess Sasami. I am
Kodachi Seru, and this is my ship."

Sasami bowed in return. "How do you do," she replied
politely.

Seru was a minor house of nobles, not very popular in the
empire. They weren't disliked, but they never did anything
controversial, so most people, royalty and commoners alike,
dismissed them as boring. In the meantime, the members of the
house of Seru quietly made a large fortune in the private sector.
For Kodachi to call this her ship meant that she both owned it,
Juraian ships never being leased, financed, or mortgaged, and
performed the duties of a captain and pilot. A Juraian space
tree only answered to one mistress.

Mihoshi blinked, remembering something Kiyone had said
about traveling secretly.

"Very well, thank you," the captain replied in cultured
tones. "I trust that all is well? Is there anything, anything I
can do at all for my princess?"

Sasami shook her head quickly, sending her long ponytails
flying. "No, I'm fine, thank you."

The captain clapped her hands together happily, a smile
forming on her face. "How lovely! We don't often see other
royalty on board, much less a princess. I hope you'll allow me
to throw a banquet in your honor? We can get a few pictures
made, perhaps you would consent to bless Dinu-oh..." she trailed
off, enthusiastically listing activities she wanted Sasami to
perform.

As she talked, Sasami's mood grew darker and darker, as did
her expression. This was how it was all over the empire. She
wasn't a princess, she was trained seal, expected to perform on
demand. A feeling of hopelessness washed over her. She had a
duty to the empire, though, didn't she? She couldn't very well
refuse.

Mihoshi, who had been rudely dismissed as someone not
important enough to notice, saw Sasami's deepening frown.
Although she didn't understand why her charge was unhappy, she
quickly realized who was causing it. "Excuse me," she began in
her most authoritative voice, "but Princess Sasami will not be
taking part in any public ceremonies."

"blu nuhg...What?" Kodachi said as her tongue stumbled to a
halt. She tried to get a grip on this unpleasant new concept.

"Sasami is under my protection," Mihoshi stated firmly.
"And I have been given orders to deliver her to her family
estates on Jurai, quietly. We are traveling incogkneetoe."

The captain blinked. "Incognito? But, but WHY?"

Mihoshi's brain stumbled. "Uh, uh..."

"Because I've been called back by my mommy and she said not
to cause a spectacle on the way home," Sasami supplied helpfully,
with a glance at Mihoshi.

Mihoshi nodded, then ahhed as something occurred to her.
Completely ignoring the matter at hand, she began digging in her
pocket.

"But, but, but you're the _PRINCESS_!" the captain wailed
piteously, raw need in her voice. Several passengers stopped and
stared at the sight. "I can't let a princess travel on my ship
without getting some kind of recognition out of it! I've got a
business to run here! I need all the advertising I can get!" she
whined, kneading her hands.

Mihoshi finally found what she was looking for, then looked
around at the gathering crowd. "Umm, Sasami? This is a
spectacle, isn't it?"

Sasami looked around at the crowd. "Oh, no, you're right,
Mihoshi, it is." She glared her tiny fury at the captain, who
wilted instantly. "There, you see what you've caused? You made
me disobey my mommy! That always makes her angry, and trust me,
you wouldn't like my mommy when she's angry."

Kodachi blanched and looked around at the dozen or so
people who were standing around, listening to them talk. "I'm
very sorry, Puh... Little girl," she finished lamely. "Listen
up everyone!" she announced loudly, turning to the crowd. "It's
officially Nirvana hour down at the bar! Follow me and you all
get free drinks!"

The crowd broke into a cheer and happily trailed behind as
she marched off to the ship's bar, intending to get very very
intoxicated. Hopefully she could forget the mental image that
popped into her mind when the princess warned that her mother
might get mad if she caused a scene. That was a thought no sober
mind could deal with.

"Thank you, Mihoshi," Sasami said gratefully.

"Oh... Right... Anyway," Mihoshi replied, getting back to
her question, "this _is_ a spectacle, isn't it?"

Sasami took one good look at the pair of Katsuhito's
glasses Mihoshi held in her hand and hit the floor with a groan.
"Yes, Mihoshi," she replied with a kind of resigned tolerance as
she climbed to her feet. "Those are Grandfather Masaki's
spectacles, glasses, whatever you call them."

"Silica-based head-mounted optical magnification lenses?"
Mihoshi supplied brightly.

"And that," Sasami replied.

"Here, you take them. I found them on the beach, but
forgot about them until now. You'll see Grandfather before I
will, so you give them back to him."

Sasami shrugged and put them in the pocket of her blouse.
"Okay. Hey, wow! Is that the new Dead Men Walking game?!" she
cried, looking through the nearby arched doorway at an arcade
center.

Mihoshi looked around until she spotted it, and noticed
that Sasami was making a beeline for it. "Sasami, wait!" she
called.

The princess slowed and turned around, still walking,
though backward. "It's okay! I don't need someone around all
the time, you go go on ahead. Have fun, see things, I'll be
right here, bye!" she waved. Then she turned around and streaked
for the complicated looking machine, which reminded Mihoshi of a
voting booth as designed by Washu-chan.

Mihoshi wavered in indecision. On one hand, she was
Sasami's guardian, and couldn't very well guard her if she wasn't
around. On the other, Sasami clearly didn't want her around, and
the average crime rate on ships was incredibly low. She frowned,
trying to decide what to do.

A few minutes later, it occurred to her that she was
thirsty, so she wandered off in search of the cantina.

The refreshment center, when she found it, was a nice, cozy
bubble in the middle of the ship. It would only seat about three
dozen people, but given the relatively small number of
passengers, it wasn't likely that more than a quarter of them
would suddenly have a craving for a double-scoop chocolate-and-
strawberry rootbeer float with amnyal nitrate sprinkles at the
same time.

Actually, that rarely happened at all. Never before, in
fact, and the soda jerk checked his memory thoroughly for a
similar order when Mihoshi requested it of him, pulling his
large, funnel-shaped audio receptors down with his hands so that
they sproinged back into position when he let go, a nervous
subroutine he had been trying to uninstall for months with no
success.

"You want a what?" the android, for all intents and
purposes a he, asked.

Mihoshi patiently repeated her order.

The robot blinked, the little round lights of its eyes
going black momentarily. A row of lights danced and blinked in a
flat line, suggesting more than simulating a mouth as it replied.
"Well, okay, if you insist." Rather than turn around, the
robot's metallic grey head simply spun a 180 on the slender,
straight tube that served as a neck so that it could watch as its
sole pair of arms pulled rapidly on levers, grabbed for cups, and
operated an ice cream scoop.

Mihoshi watched, mesmerized as the robot worked with
astonishing speed and surety. She leaned over the counter,
standing on one leg with the knee of the other on her stool, a
classic perky-and-interested pose that looked right at home in
the simulated drugstore surroundings. In a few brief moments a
tall crystal glass brimming with foamy brown liquid was deposited
in front of her and the robot's metal hand made a quick pass over
the top, carpet-bombing the top scoop of pink ice-cream with neon
blue sprinkles.

"There you go, Miss," the robot announced, its optical
sensors suddenly focused on the way Mihoshi's shirt strained to
keep her natural bounty in check as she leaned over the counter
and breathed deeply of the scent of root beer and ice cream.
"You, uh, need anything else?"

Mihoshi looked up, her carbon-based photoreceptors meeting
his own of hydrogenated phosphor. She smiled. "A spoon would be
nice."

The robot, consistently referred to as Robot, even by his
friends, slapped one hand to his forehead in dismay, producing a
hollow bonging sound. "Oi! A spoon! I forgot the spoon!" he
exclaimed aloud, running to and fro as he frantically searched
for a spoon.

Mihoshi giggled at his antics, and a few moments later,
spoon produced, he handed it to her with an apologetic bow.
"Terribly sorry, Miss, I'd forget my own head if it wasn't bolted
to my body."

Mihoshi giggled again, although she already had a spoonful
of ice cream and rootbeer in her mouth, with another on the way.
"You're really funny, Mr. Robot," she said, wiping her mouth with
a napkin he thoughtfully handed her.

"Please, just call me Robot, all my friends do."

"I'm Mihoshi!" she declared between bites.

"Of course you are," he replied politely. "So, ever
traveled on a Seru ship before?"

Mihoshi shook her head, making her blonde curls bounce.
"Nope, never. I used to have my own ship, but it kind of got
destroyed in a fight."

"What kind of fight?" Robot asked, interested.

"Well, you see, I was in hot pursuit of the dread space
pirate, Ryoko!"

She paused to swallow a few more scoops, and the robot used
the time to make a logic jump that told him there was a 87 +/-14%
chance that she was a Galaxy Police detective.

"We flew all over the place, and we finally ended up at
this little pre-contact planet a few light-years from here.
Well, to make a long story short, we both crashed there. And
then I was stuck," she paused to take a drink, then continued,
"for eleven months! But it was okay, the people were really
nice, even Ryoko after I got to know her, and other people kept
arriving, except for the scientist Washu, who had really been
there the whole time," she inhaled a portion of rootbeer and
crunched a few sprinkles, "and we all made friends, and then
there was all this sex with Tenchi, oh, no, that makes it seem
like I had sex with him-doesn't it sound like I had sex with him
to you? Well I didn't, I just watched, his family owned the
place some of the others stayed at, and Kiyone and I, Kiyone's my
partner and best friend," she ate six large spoonfuls of ice
cream as she took a breath, "stayed in town and visited
sometimes, but then everyone left and Kiyone and I were assigned
t-ahhh!" she cried, dropping the spoon on the counter as she
clutched her head in pain.

"Ice cream headache," the robot commented blankly, his
circuits momentarily overloaded. "I see them all the time."

"Gahhhh!" Mihoshi replied cleverly.

"Yeah, me, too," he replied.


****************


"Man, that was a long, boring job," Amaraba complained as
he and his girlfriend re-entered the tiny cabin they shared.

"Unh huh. This job blows." Ura flopped back on the bed,
still in uniform, flinging her arms wide. Her left hand ended up
on top of their blue and grey duffle bag. She soon sat up,
however, when she noticed Amaraba taking off his shirt and
dropping his pants to the floor.

He looked up as she whistled, then laughed and held a pose.

Ura clapped appreciatively. "A ten, a full ten."

He glanced down, then grinned stupidly. "I've always
thought so, but no one would believe me." He laughed
uproariously at his own joke.

"Hmph, you wish," she replied, suddenly catty. "In that
case, make it a five."

"Hey!"

"Y'know," she said thoughtfully, tapping her chin. "I
really wish you'd get one of those 'Prince Arberts'."

His hands flew to his bare groin, covering it protectively.
"No way! There ain't no way I'm going let some freak doctor cut
my dick off and replace it with one grown in a vat!"

Ura laughed hard and beat her hands against the bed.
"Stupid, a Prince Arbert ain't a vat grown cock, it's a kind of
piercing!"

"Oh." He felt stupid, and was uncomfortably aware he was
blushing.

"Yeah, it's where they take one of the big hoops and jam it
through the end of your dick," she explained.

He cowered back, once again covering his privates. "Like
that's any better! Count me out!"

"You pansy," she taunted, but let the matter drop.
"Anyway, let's get dressed and hit the bar, alright?"

"What about the tingle-sense room?" he asked hopefully.

"And there!"

"Cool." He walked over and unzipped the bag. He had some
black pseudoleather pants and a vest that would be perfect.

A moment later, he looked up in confusion. "Ura? Did you
leave all our clothes back on Waldow?"

She frowned. "No, everything we had fit in the bag. Why?"

He pulled out a small wad of strange clothes, obviously
none of theirs. The clothes only came in three shades, white,
grey, and yellow. It was all cloth, too, not pseudoleather.

"Huh, that's pretty weird." She sat up to look.

"Oh, I get it," he said loudly, walking in a tight circle.
"I must have gotten the bag switched up at the airport with that
lesbian chick. She seemed so sure she got it right, though." He
laughed. "I guess she was wrong."

"That was pretty stupid," Ura replied. "What else is in
there?"

"That was it," Amaraba confessed, laying the clothes to the
side. "That's kind weird, I thought the bag had way more than
that in it..." He poked around at the bottom of the bag, only a
few inches below the rim. A pull-tab caught his attention.
"What's this?" he asked as he pulled it.

A snowfield of white powder greeted their eyes as the false
bottom peeled back.

"What's all this white shit?" Ura demanded.

Amaraba shrugged. "I dunno, it looks like flour. Maybe
she's a traveling baker?"

Ura shook her head. "No, no, I swear, you can be such a
dimwit sometimes, Amaraba. This is like that powder makeup
stuff."

Amaraba shook his head. "No freaking way. Who in the hell
would carry around fifty pounds of it?"

Ura conceded that he had a point. "Well... It ain't
flour."

"I guess not. Hmm, what could it be?" They thought in
silence for a few moments, then Amaraba snapped his fingers. "I
know! It's drugs!"

Understanding dawned in Ura's eyes.

"Yeah, it makes sense! White powder hidden under a false
bottom, carried by someone you wouldn't suspect as a drugrunner,
a cute blonde lesbian, it HAS to be drugs." He stared at the
heavy white powder in awe. "Holy shit! There must be a hundred
million notes worth of it in that bag! Baby, we're rich!"

"Yay!" she cheered, hopping off the bed so she could dance
around the room with her naked boyfriend.

Amaraba abruptly stopped, causing Ura to knock him down and
fall on top. She ended up sitting on his stomach, looking down
at him with a cutely puzzled expression.

"I just thought of something," he replied to her unspoken
question as he gingerly rubbed the back of his head.

"Huh? Whuzzat?"

"That weird lesbian chick must have been a drugrunner! And
we've got her shit!"

Ura paled. The people who transported drugs across the
galaxy were widely known to be badasses. When most companies
wanted to ship an incredibly valuable artifact, they hired a team
of crack security guards to make sure it didn't get stolen. Drug
cartels didn't have that option, so they hired one man to do the
work of twelve. When carrying around a few hundred million in
drugs, a runner could NOT allow himself to be robbed, detected,
or arrested. They were trained to evade, outwit, and kill,
quickly, efficiently, and above all silently.

"We're dead, ain't we?"

Amaraba gulped and nodded. "I'd say we pack it and haul
ass, but..."

She nodded, and a single tear crept out of the corner of
her eye to roll down her cheek. "I'm too young to die," she said
fearfully.

"And I ain't?" he asked incredulously.

"I'm too beautiful to die!" she bawled.

"Hey, hey, calm down." He struggled to sit up and wrap his
arms around her. "We're smart, we can figure out somethin' to
get outta this," he said consolingly.

Ura's response was to burst into tears once more. "We're
gonna die!"

Amaraba privately agreed, and that was his salvation. It's
amazing how the fear of pain and death can focus the mind. In
this case, Amaraba's adrenaline inspired mind actually managed to
have a fairly good idea.

"Why don't we switch back?" he offered. "I mean, if we
didn't notice that we got the wrong bag until now, what are the
odds the lesbian did? Most of the passengers just threw their
stuff in their cabins and hit the casino, anyway."

Ura sniffled and wiped her nose across his bare chest,
leaving a cool trail of mucus.

"Hey, we didn't leave anything in our bag that has our
names or pictures or anything, so even if she did look in it,
she's not going to know who switched."

"But she probably remembers talking with you in line," she
pointed out as she wiped at her eyes.

"Maybe, maybe not, but if her drugs suddenly show back up
and we take our bag back, maybe she won't hunt us down. I mean,
it ain't like _we're_ gonna say anything to the cops."

Ura nodded, feeling a faint twinge of hope.

Amaraba started really getting into the idea. "We're both
crewmembers, right? And one of our duties is cleaning the
cabins, right?"

She nodded.

"We just use our cards to get in the room, like we're gonna
clean it, and then we swap the bags. No sweat."

Ura thought about it for a moment. "That's your plan?"

He nodded.

"Well, I like it!" she agreed. "Now... Wait, we're not
supposed to clean the cabins until around 12 tomorrow. Aren't
they going to ask questions if we stumble in when they're asleep
tonight and try to switch?"

Amaraba opened his mouth to reply, then shut it again. He
didn't know.

"But if we wait too long, she's gonna _definitely_ find out
that she got the wrong bag. Then she's gonna hunt us down and
pull our spleens out through our asses."

"I know, I know!" he replied in a rising tone of voice.
"But what can we do? I say we go for it right now. It's only
ten, they probably ain't made it back to their cabin yet. If we
hurry, we can make it."

Ura jumped off his chest. "Well, hot stuff, you better put
your uniform back on. This ain't the Luv Boat, you know, we're
expected to wear clothes at least MOST of the time."

He nodded eagerly and jumped up.

Another thought occurred to Ura as she watched him dress.
"Umm, not to be all bitchy and stuff, but I've got another
question..."

He glanced at her, annoyed. "What, another one? Do you
always have to pick at my ideas apart?"

"Sorry, geeze. Anyway, what cabin is she staying in? Do
you know?"

Amaraba looked her square in the eye. "Shit."



To be continued in part b...