Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ N.D.W. ❯ A Unwanted Goodbye ( One-Shot )

N. D. W.

 

People.

People fascinate me.

The way they act, look, talk, and think. I know I'm one of them too, at least that's what I tell myself. I love to watch them, interact with them, learn with them, and teach them, at least try to. They help each other out through life. Some help some...don't. I met a man who dedicated his life to saving children. He put children first but, he also killed. He killed for many reasons but he killed for all the wrong reasons. One reason was a man told him to. A man that could be called the devil himself, with a devils name…

 

KNIVES….

 

That name…

That name troubles me.

That man troubles me. I hope to defeat him or maybe I don't, I'm not sure. I love him but, I fear him more. I think he fears me too. That man, Nicolas D. Wolfwood, was his name. So he told me. That man, I loved him to. In a different way than my brother, or was it? Oh did I mention he's my brother? We're twins, Knives and I. He lays beside me now. We fought, I shot him, how many times I don't remember, but I kept him alive. He's asleep now. I can't sleep when he does. I can see what he sees. These things I see? Well, never mind that. Again that man, Nicolas, a mysterious, strong, handsome man. We were lovers. He is gone now, like all the people I care about in my life. It's all because of him, the devil who's sleeping beside me with an angels face. I can't blame him for the way he is. He has his reasons and, although different, I have mine too. But I do blame him.

 

He stirs, and I look at him with that same helpless stupid look that I always show. He laughs. He knows I want him, need him. I know he wants me too. He tries to sit up but is defeated by his fresh wounds. He looks at me helplessly and I break. The hatred and the pain go. Everything, gone. Why does he have this power over me? Why can't I face him, tell him?

 

“Vashu...” Please don't say my name like that. “Vashu, do you hate me?” Why, why does he ask this? `Of course!' I want to say.

 

“No. Not at all Knives.” But is this true? I know it is.

 

“Are you mad?” Ha! What a question to ask. I wrap my arms around him to embrace him in a hug and whisper in his ear.

 

“Not at all.”

 

“I'm sorry, Vashu.”

 

“I know you are, Knives.” I lay down beside him, putting my arms behind my head and he rests his head on my chest. I put my face in his hair, it smells like gun powder and sweat.

“Vashu, I wish I could start over.” I sigh.

 

“You can Knives. We will start everything over.” He goes to speak but I interrupt. “Shhh... sleep now.” He smiles. Closing his eyes and holding me tight he nods off to sleep. For the first time in many years I lay here next to my brother, my enemy, my lover, and have a worry free sleep.