InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Lucky Ones ❯ Chapter Sixteen ( Chapter 16 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

The Lucky Ones

By Terri Botta

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. Sole copyright belongs to Viz and Rumiko Takashi. I'm poor so don't sue.

Rating: R for later chapters.

Pairing: Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango

Summary: Sometimes Fate hands you a gift you never thought you'd ever get, and it's up to you to accept it for what it is.

Email feedback to: tci100@psu.edu

Webpage: http://www.wordsmiths.net/Botta

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Chapter Sixteen

Three weeks. It had been three weeks since they had begun… whatever it was that they'd begun. Three weeks since she had refused his promise, but not refused anything else.

`She didn't refuse you. She just told you you had to do something about Kikyou,' Inuyasha mentally berated himself. `And she's right. You can't stay between two women anymore, you stupid worthless fuck. You can't pledge yourself to one when you're still promised to another.'

He growled and took his frustration out on the carp he was gutting, blood splattering everywhere.

`But I want to build Kagome a house! And I want her to live in it with me, and the pup, and our own pups that will come along later. I want to be with her. But how can I? And what about Kikyou? How can I abandon her when she suffered so much for me? How can I tell her I want to choose Kagome? And am I choosing Kagome for the right reasons? Do I choose her because she mates with me? No, we don't mate, we… we make love as she calls it. Mating is too harsh a word for what she does to me. So do I choose her because she'll make love with me? If Kikyou had made love with me, would I feel any different about her? Kikyou would never have made love with you, you idiot. You're a tainted hanyou, remember? That's what got you into this mess in the first place. Kikyou refused to touch you unless you became human. So does that mean that Kikyou didn't love me?'

He paused to think about that and decided he didn't like the taste it left in his mouth. He moved to the second carp. It was still flapping weakly, gasping for breath. Usually the fox kit would come fishing with him and kill the catch as he swiped them onto the riverbank, but recently Shippo had been distant and oddly quiet around him.

`It's because he smells you all over Kagome, and he knows what's happened between you and he wants to know why you're not building her a fucking house! Or worse, he knows why you're not building her a house and thinks you're an indecisive, woman-using, fucked up bastard.'

He let out a snarl and gutted the carp while it was still alive, the death feeling unusually satisfying today. His youkai side was raging, his blood boiling. It had no qualms about choosing Kagome. Kagome mated with him, was fertile, and didn't want to purify the youkai out of him. As far as his youkai side was concerned, there was no choice to be made.

But his human heart had other ideas. It remembered the lonely miko who had reached out to an outcast hanyou. It remembered the long days of following her, of sitting next to her, of listening for her call. His whole body would come alive at the sound of her voice or the whiff of her scent. The heart remembered the love he had held for her, the hope he had seen when he looked into her eyes.

`I can't just forget Kikyou. Kagome knows that.'

He took the livers and put them in the clay jar, noting that it was almost full.

`Good. Kagome will have plenty of liver. I have to provide for her. She's still nursing the pup.'

He sighed. The pup. Yukio. His son. Another reason to choose Kagome. They were raising the pup together. He remembered all too well her distress and upset when he had suggested taking Yukio away from her, to `free' her from the burden of her double life. He never wanted to see that look on her face again. Kagome loved Yukio as if he was her own child and he would never hurt her so badly as to take the pup away.

And what would Kikyou do with the pup anyway? She couldn't feed him. The pup would know she was dead when he smelled the grave soil. He could just imagine it.

`I'm sorry, pup. I'm going to take you away from a living, breathing woman who adores you and feeds you from her own breast, and give you to an undead walking pile of clay and bones who can't feed you and probably wouldn't want to even if she could. Aren't I the best Oyaji ever? You may begin hating me now.'

He slammed his hand to the ground to keep himself from losing control. The pain kept him focused, kept him functioning. If he let himself fall apart now he might never be able to put himself back together. Slinging the gutted carp over his shoulder, he made his way back to the village.

He found Kagome sitting with the taijiya, her somber brother and the fox kit outside of the old woman's hut. She had Yukio sitting in her lap wearing the red dog shirt that she loved so much. He was growing into it. Actually, he was growing like crazy. He'd easily doubled his weight in the time he had been with them. By his calculations the pup was just over twelve weeks old and showing it. Already he was becoming more mobile, crawling out of his carrier on his own and sitting up by himself. And he had almost a full set of teeth, much to poor Kagome's dismay. Even though the pup never bit her with those teeth, he still put pressure on her nipples with them, making them sore and red.

`I can barely touch them now when we make love. They always hurt her, but it's too soon for her to wean him.'

He approached them and they looked his way when they saw him coming. Kagome offered him a bright smile that always made his heart skip a beat and his stomach clench because he knew he didn't deserve her joy but couldn't help but feel glad to see it. Sango gave him a smile as well, but it was colder, more reserved, and her eyes were veiled. Shippo pointedly looked away, concentrating on the pup in Kagome's lap, while the boy, Kohaku, met his gaze with haunted eyes.

`Hm. My brother may have saved that kid's life, but I think part of his soul's already dead. His sad face always gives me the creeps. He's seen and done too much and he remembers all of it. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't have been better to have just let him die.'

"Inuyasha," Kagome greeted as he joined them.

"More liver and fish for dinner," he said, offering her the clay jar and his catch.

"Thank you," she replied.

Yukio squealed happily, making Inuyasha cringe, and opened his arms. The adult hanyou responded by rubbing the pup's ears.

"Hey, pup."

"You are as diligent as always, Inuyasha," Sango commented.

"Uhhh, yeah," he stammered back, unable to meet her too calm gaze. `Woman knows what's going on too. Kagome talks to her a lot. I know how she feels about it. I've heard her say she'd have dropped me off a cliff by now. It's a good thing she's sticking close to home now that she's starting to show. She'll sit out the next shard hunt, I'm sure of it.'

"Why don't you take them in to Kaede, Inuyasha. I'm sure she'll have an idea as to what to do with them. Maybe she'll bake them for us if we promise to share," Kagome suggested.

"Yeah, okay." It was a clear dismissal and he felt a pang of jealousy. What were she and the others talking about that she didn't want him around to hear?

`You most likely, you stupid fuck. She's probably telling her all about your latest escapades. No… Kagome would never betray our privacy that way,' he thought, taking his kill into the hut where the old woman was tying up dried herbs.

"Oi. Kaede-baba. I brought fish and more liver."

"Inuyasha," the old miko answered. "Put them by the fire pit. I'll cook them later."

"Kagome wanted to know if you could bake them if we promised to share."

"Hrrrmmm. Yes, I can do that if you'll bring me more wood."

He sat next to her, crossing his legs. "I can do that later. Is there anything you need help with right now?"

Kaede gave him a wry, knowing look. "It's not polite to eavesdrop, Inuyasha."

He snorted and bit his lip. "I'm not!" he protested.

Her look never changed but she reached over and handed him a bucket of fresh herbs. "Separate those into leaves, stems and flowers."

He grunted and got to work, but the old woman was right, he was eavesdropping. Sometimes he swore Kagome forgot he had enhanced hearing.

"So, you were telling me about your trip home." Sango's voice, light and interested.

He heard Kagome sigh. "It was good. I picked up my school work and celebrated my birthday."

"You're seventeen now, ne?"

"Yep. My friends threw me a birthday party. It was a lot of fun."

He smirked as he separated the herbs. Yeah, her party had been fun, but not as much fun as she'd had once she got home. He'd stayed behind to watch Yukio because no one knew about the pup, and when Kagome got back she wanted what she called `birthday sex.' It wasn't any different from their normal lovemaking, except that they were doing it on her birthday and in her bed, but she'd said it was the best birthday present ever.

Come to think of it, it had been just a little more exciting and urgent, but he'd blamed the extra rush on knowing someone could walk in on them at any moment and find them in a compromising position. And he'd taken extra care to make sure he pleased her more than usual. He'd had no other present for her, so he opted for giving her a couple of extra climaxes… okay, a few extra climaxes. She could be so damned responsive when he got her going.

Inuyasha squirmed where he sat, his body reacting to the memory and he had to squash his arousal.

`Damn. I'm hopeless. I can't go a single morning without thinking about her in my arms. Well, it could have something to do with the fact that it's her bleeding time right now and I can't have her until it's over.'

It had only been three days but his body was already screaming, and he had at least another two days to wait. Kagome had taken him into her mouth yesterday to help ease the urge, and that had taken the edge off his need, but nothing compared to being inside her and now that he had had her, he craved her like he craved food.

`Two days. Just two more days…' he reminded himself. Then they would have two weeks of worry-free, or mostly worry-free, lovemaking until her heat cycle began. He was already making plans about what to do on that first night.

He squirmed again, growling to himself and concentrating on separating the herbs without shredding them with his claws. And turned his ears backward to catch more of the conversation going on outside, ignoring Kaede's tsk-ing mutter.

"So, has Inuyasha spoken with Kikyou?" he heard Sango ask.

He froze in mid-separation, his whole body tensing as he listened for Kagome's answer.

"No." She sounded calm, but sad.

The taijiya snorted derisively. "Really Kagome, how can you stand it? You give yourself to him and agree to raise this child with him, and yet you continue to let him two-time you."

He drooped his ears.

"It's… it's not that simple," Kagome defended. "Inuyasha can't forget about Kikyou. I've always known that."

`Defending you again, you good-for-nothing jerk,' he thought dourly. `You don't deserve the love and faith she shows you.'

"It is that simple," Sango argued vehemently. "Who broke his seal? Who has stayed beside him? Who has cared for him and saved him? How many times have you risked your life to protect him? Do you think Kikyou would have approached him when he was in full youkai form? Do you think she would have comforted him and forgiven him when he slaughtered those human bandits? Do you think she would have saved you if your places had been reversed and it was you who needed purifying?"

Inuyasha waited to hear her answer. He knew there were serious doubts about Kikyou's intentions and choices. Hell, he had them himself.

`Would my Kikyou have behaved the way she has done? Is she truly only a shadow of the woman she once was? A shell that bears her face and has her memories?'

"I… I don't know. I have to believe she would have because Inuyasha would never have fallen in love with someone who wouldn't. I have to believe that someone who would nurse a crippled bandit like Onigumo, even though he had filthy thoughts about her and wanted to see her corrupted, would also have saved me if I needed help. I have to believe that because the alternative is unthinkable."

He closed his eyes, gritting his teeth at the wave of pride and bittersweet joy that welled up inside his chest. The size of her heart never ceased to amaze him. Kikyou had been pure and good, but no one... no one had a heart as pure and vast as Kagome. Kagome forgave, and forgave and forgave. She harbored no hate or bitterness or resentment. Yes, she was jealous and envious of Kikyou but she had every right to be, and she never let those negative feelings stay for long.

Kikyou, on the other hand, had hated. Her hate had run deep and tainted their love well before Naraku turned them against each other. She'd never trusted him and he'd never really trusted her. Always she kept herself apart, blaming her responsibilities and duties as a miko for her aloneness; all the while cursing those same duties for dooming her to a life of servitude at the cost of her own happiness. She wore her pain and suffering like a shroud, using it to hold her away from others, especially him. Kikyou had said she wanted to be a normal woman and live with him as husband and wife, but what she had really wanted was freedom.

`And you were willing to give it to her because you loved her and were desperate to finally belong somewhere. And she did love you. She did. As much as she was able.'

He stopped his thoughts because Kagome was speaking again and he focused on her words.

"And we don't know what broke his seal. I mean, I know I was the one who pulled out Kikyou's arrow, but he was already awake by then. Not even Kaede-obachan knows why he woke up," she continued.

Sango snorted. "I think it's obvious that you did, and you could do it because you have Kikyou's soul. The only one who could have broken the seal was the one who put it on him in the first place."

`That's right. Kagome is Kikyou reincarnated. Her soul is Kikyou's, well… except for the part that Kikyou still has. I wonder. Does she miss that tiny piece sometimes? Does it bring her pain? She's never said…'

"I don't know anything about that," he heard Kagome sigh.

`That's a lie,' he thought. `She knows it was her scent… or maybe her scream for help. I don't know exactly what it was, but I know it was she that woke me. I don't think she did it consciously. I think her soul just reached out for mine and grabbed hold of it. I remember coming out of my long sleep to the scent of her coming towards me, but before that…'

"What I do know is that Inuyasha still has feelings for Kikyou and I can't compete with them. She was his first love, and he feels responsible for her death because Naraku made them betray each other, and Kikyou chose to follow him rather than use the Shikon no Tama to heal her wounds," Kagome went on.

"Kikyou chose to die because she was tired of having to live with her responsibilities."

Anger welled in him at the taijiya's callous remark. `What the fuck does she know?'

"I…" Kagome began.

"No, Kagome, listen to me. I've seen it before. People in my village, men who had fought youkai all their lives got tired of always facing death, of always fighting. They'd make mistakes or lose their hearts for the battle. Usually they'd die at the hands of a youkai and everyone would say they died bravely fulfilling their duty, but Chichi-ue would point them out to me and tell me they'd just given up. What looked like a valiant, brave battle was just seppuku in disguise. In time, I could tell the difference too, and from everything I have heard about Kikyou's death, she used it as an escape from a life she didn't want to live any longer," Sango explained, her voice hard with conviction.

"Oh my god. Don't ever, ever let Inuyasha hear you say that," Kagome gasped.

"Why not? It's true and someone has to kick some sense into that boy because you won't. He clings to an idealized memory of a woman who never existed and ignores the one in front of him. He takes responsibility for something that was not his fault, and assumes blame where he is blameless. Do you see Kikyou coming around and begging forgiveness for sealing him to that tree? Don't forget it was Naraku's claws that dealt Kikyou her mortal wound not Inuyasha's, but it was Kikyou's arrow that pinned Inuyasha to the God Tree. She shot him. Inuyasha never touched her."

Inuyasha felt like he'd been kicked in the gut, and he clenched his fists as rage roiled up inside of him.

`No. That's not true. It is my fault. If only I had trusted her… Kikyou would not have died.'

Kagome seemed to be reading his mind because her next words were, "But if they had only trusted each other and their love, Naraku would never have been able to force them to betray each other."

"And how do you think they could have done that? Naraku attacked Kikyou first when Inuyasha wasn't with her, then put the Shikon no Tama back into the shrine just so Inuyasha would steal it and be in a position for Kikyou to shoot him. Just how do you think that could have gone any differently other than Inuyasha finding Kikyou mortally wounded and watching her die in his arms? Naraku wanted Kikyou's death. The only way they could have prevented that was if Inuyasha hadn't left Kikyou alone, which he did because she didn't trust him and was ashamed of him because he was a hanyou. If she had really and truly trusted and loved him, she would never have asked him to become human for her. She would have loved him as a hanyou the way you do. Kikyou's powers weakened when she fell in love with Inuyasha while yours got stronger. Why do you think that is?"

Sango's angry words were blows to his heart, and he clenched his fists so tightly his claws dug into his palms and blood seeped down to splash on the wooden floor.

`Damn bitch's mouth is running away with her, but no matter what I won't… I won't hit a pregnant woman.'

"Inuyasha," Kaede said softly and he opened his eyes to see her holding a cloth out to him for his bleeding hands.

He was reaching for the cloth when the reed door flew open and a very pissed off and weeping taijiya stormed in.

"Do you hear me, Inuyasha?! You don't owe that undead clay pot anything! You fulfilled your obligation when you killed Naraku and avenged her death! So you stop hurting my friend! You'll never find anyone who loves you as much as Kagome-chan! Stop two-timing her, you selfish, ignorant, indecisive jerk!"

She took the wooden bucket with the herbs and smashed it over his head.

"BAKA!" she screamed, tears streaming down her face, then she ran out leaving a very stunned Kagome in the doorway, holding Yukio.

"Ummm," Kagome said, blinking at him.

He was holding his head and desperately trying to keep in the string of curses that were begging to be let out. In a moment, she was by his side, placing Yukio in his lap, pulling out one of her magic cold packs from her bag and putting it on the rising lump.

"Please forgive her, Inuyasha. She's pregnant and all my books about pregnancy say now is when all her hormones start going crazy. She's not really herself and she didn't mean it," she stammered, her hands shaking as she treated him.

He gritted his teeth and said nothing. She saw the wounds on his palms and he knew she recognized them for what they were, but to her credit she kept quiet. Digging into her bag again, she took out the bandages and other supplies to clean and dress the wounds. As always, she tended him with gentleness and care, wiping the blood off of his palms and spreading healing cream on the cuts before loosely wrapping them in white gauze. He didn't bother to tell her that the wounds would be gone by nightfall. In truth, he needed her tender touch to soothe the aches in his soul, and he wanted nothing more than to lay his head on her shoulder and beg her forgiveness for being such a bastard.

Instead he opted for taking her hands in his when she was finished dressing them and raised regretful eyes to hers. She looked back at him with sorrow, understanding and love.

`I truly, truly do not deserve you,' he thought sadly.

They looked into each other's eyes for long moments, then Kagome leaned forward and hugged him. It was forgiveness, comfort and absolution all at once and he wrapped arms around her, pulling her as close as he could with Yukio in his lap, and buried his face in her hair.

"I love you," she whispered.

He answered with a soft breath of air against her skin as he nuzzled his lips against her throat, feeling the steady pulse of her heartbeat beneath his mouth. He let his tongue sneak out and taste her flesh, but for once since they'd become lovers his body did not react to her closeness, other than to feel solace in her embrace.

`I love you too Kagome,' he replied silently.

She pulled back and kissed him on the forehead.

"Can you watch Yukio?" she asked.

He nodded, still not really able to speak.

"I'm gonna go make sure Sango is okay. I'll be back in a little while."

"Okay," he managed faintly.

She gave him a watery smile and left the hut quietly. Yukio watched her go and gave a little whimper of distress.

"Oi, pup. You're with Oyaji now," he told the pup, rubbing his ears.

Yukio turned huge golden eyes his way and whined, stuffing his fist into his mouth. The action reminded Inuyasha of something he'd gotten for the pup, and he reached into the front of his haori to get it.

"Here," he said, handing Yukio a small river stone about twice the size of the pup's fist.

Yukio snatched it and immediately put it to his mouth, gnawing on it because it was too big to fit. Inuyasha gave a grunt of approval. The pup was still teething and he'd already bitten through multiple teething rings that Kagome had bought for him. He knew Kagome would be upset, but pups typically teethed on rocks. This one was smooth and clean because he'd taken it out of the river himself when he was fishing. Hopefully it would last longer than the teething aids Kagome had spent money on.

Pup pacified, he turned his attention to Kaede and the wreckage of the herb bucket.

"I'm sorry. I'll clean this up," he promised, already picking up the scattered plants.

The old woman looked at him with wise and sympathetic eyes. "Think nothing of it. I am sure Sango herself will bring me a new bucket to replace the one she broke. You are alright, are you not?"

"Keh, I'm a lot more hard-headed than that, baba."

Kaede just chuckled. "Am I expected to ignore that?"

He snorted. "What? You got something to say too? Gonna tell me I'm a rotten, two-timing bastard?"

The old miko sighed. "We have spoken of this before, Inuyasha. Kikyou-onee-sama is no longer the woman you knew. My sister died over fifty years ago and what walks in her image is naught but a fake shell of earth and bones."

"But the soul is Kikyou's," he insisted.

"The soul is Kagome's. What animates my sister now is a stolen piece of soul that rightfully belongs to her reincarnation," Kaede corrected.

"Am I to just abandon her then? To ignorantly go on with my life, heedless of her pain and suffering?"

"Are you so certain she would think herself abandoned?"

"Huh?"

"Inuyasha, Naraku is dead and my sister's death avenged. You and your traveling companions have all returned here to this village. Where is Kikyou-onee-sama? She is not here. She did not return to the village of her birth and to me, her sister. Here, we would know what she is and she would have no fear of being discovered. And you are here as well, Inuyasha. If she holds such love for you, why is she not here by your side?" the old woman pointed out calmly.

Inuyasha shrugged. He was glad Kikyou wasn't there. When his two loves were in close proximity, he always felt torn in two.

"How the hell should I know? The last time we met, she was gathering shards too."

"To what end?"

"To complete the Shikon no Tama."

"And then what?"

"I don't know."

"Inuyasha, it pains me to admit, but you can no longer assume that my sister's intentions for the jewel are pure," Kaede warned.

He shook his head. "I refuse to believe to that. Kikyou… Kikyou's been different ever since Kagome saved her from Naraku's miasma."

"Ah yes, Kagome… that sweet, loving child who gives you all of herself and asks nothing from you in return. Even when you were with my sister when she was alive, I never saw your eyes soften for her the way they do for Kagome. You want to build her a house."

He sighed in defeat. "Yes. But she has refused me because of Kikyou."

"She does not act like one who has refused a bonding."

He knew she was referring to the cuddling and kissing he and Kagome got up to when they were together in the hut. They had never made love or been sexually intimate with each other under Kaede's roof, but it was obvious to anyone with eyes that they were lovers.

"She told me she would accept whatever I was free to give her until I had resolved things with Kikyou," he replied, feeling ashamed. `It sounds pathetic even when I say it.'

"And have you decided what you are going to do?"

He looked away from the knowing gaze. "No."

"But yet you share your futon with Kagome and want to build her a house."

He was getting irritated again, but mostly at himself. "Yes, damnit, I already said that!"

Yukio dropped his rock and let out a plaintive cry. Inuyasha rolled his eyes even as he shushed him. `Great, now the pup's crying. If he's still bawling by the time Kagome gets back, she'll think I'm at fault and sit me for sure.'

"And what of the little one? You've promised to raise him with Kagome, have you not?"

He draped Yukio across his shoulder and patted his back. "Yes, old woman, you know full well that I have."

"Then you have already made your choice. It is just a matter of telling my sister."

"How can I? How can I tell her I choose Kagome? I made a promise to her and my life is hers. How can I turn my back on her when she has returned to me?"

Kaede held up one quieting finger. "Kikyou-onee-sama did return to you. She returned to you as Kagome. She came back through time to free you and right a terrible wrong. When Urasue resurrected my sister and put her into that clay body, she upset the balance of things. Eventually, my sister must leave this world and her soul return into Kagome. You know this, Inuyasha."

He was going to protest, but she cut him off by continuing, "And your life does not belong to her. In that, the taijiya speaks true. Your obligation ended with the death of Naraku."

"I can't. I can't abandon her and tell her she is all alone," he replied brokenly. `I made her a promise. I have nothing if I don't have my word.'

"If you do not make a choice, eventually one will be made for you, and that choice may be one you will not like. You may lose them both, Inuyasha."

"I made her a promise."

"So did my sister, but she is not here, Inuyasha. I have told you before that you cannot be together. Kikyou-onee-sama's wish was to die with you. The time for you to live the life you planned together has passed."

"But the Shikon no Tama could restore her to life, right?"

The old woman blinked at him. "And then what? Whose soul would she have? Would you have her take Kagome's?"

"No!" he gasped, practically choking on the idea. `Never! Never would I choose one at the cost of the other's life! That's why I haven't been able to choose. What if Kikyou's life depends upon me being there to protect her? I failed her twice… but… but I can't protect her if she keeps herself far away from me.'

"And say this deed is done and my sister is alive again. Would you keep your promise and become human for her so that you may live as man and wife?"

He swallowed hard, pushing the lump in his throat back down. "If… if that is to be our fate."

"You would leave Kagome and your little one to be with Kikyou-onee-sama? You would abandon the life you have made with them in an attempt to resurrect one that died fifty years ago?" Kaede asked leadingly, making him feel pressured.

He looked at the warm bundle of pup in his arms and a pair of golden eyes blinked back at him, little ears twitching in the silver hair. He was shocked by the rush of love and fierce protectiveness that flooded through him, and he touched Yukio's ears gently.

`Could I leave you? Could I turn my back on you and Kagome?'

"I don't know," he said aloud.

"And would you give up your power as a hanyou for a woman who could not love you as one and forsake the one who has loved you as you are?"

"I don't know." `Stop it, you old hag. You are really pushing me!'

Kaede heaved a huge sigh and shook her head. "Oh, Inuyasha, you have gotten yourself into a terrible bind; more terrible than the one you got yourself into when my sister sealed you to that tree. I worry about the outcome, for I see nothing but pain ahead if you do not make the right choice."

"And that choice should be Kagome not Kikyou, right? You think so too, don't you baba," he snapped, losing his temper.

"You should choose the one who loves you purely, Inuyasha."

"Are you saying Kikyou's love is tainted?" Now he was really getting angry. `No one speaks badly about Kikyou…'

"I am saying that you claim my sister loves you, but I repeat to you: if that is so, why is she not here?"

"Because she's out there gathering shards while I'm here saddled with a pregnant taijiya, a nursing bitch and a helpless pup!"

There was dead silence, which was odd because he expected an answer from the old miko, but she remained quiet and looked at something over his shoulder. His ears twitched and a familiar scent wafted into his nose. Yukio smelled it too and made a happy burble, but his own heart sank into his feet. He didn't need to look in order to know who was there.

`No… oh FUCK no…'

Resigned to his fate and cursing his temper and runaway mouth, he turned his head to see Kagome standing in the doorway. Her face was unreadable but her hands were clenched.

"Kagome…" he breathed.

She stepped forward and took the pup from him, holding him against her shoulder.

"I came to get him," was all she said in answer.

"Sango is herself again?" Kaede asked.

Kagome nodded. "She sends her regrets and apologies and promises to bring you a new bucket."

The old woman grunted an assent. "I am glad she has calmed. Stress is bad for the baby."

"She went back to her hut to take a nap. Kohaku and Shippo went with her."

"Rest will do her some good."

`They're ignoring me; pretending I'm not here. What do I do? I know Kagome heard me say that. How do I make it better?' he thought frantically.

"Kagome," he tried.

She looked at him and he immediately regretted speaking.

"Sango says to tell you she is very sorry for breaking the bucket over your head."

He winced at her cold tone. `Obviously her blow did nothing to fix my fucked up brain.'

He saw her take a deep breath and knew what was coming. He braced for it.

"I'm going home."

`What? No sit? No `Inuyasha you insensitive baka!' Just: I'm going home?' he thought, stunned and concerned.

Somehow the fact that she hadn't punished him struck more fear into his heart than anything else.

"Kagome…"

"I'm sorry that Sango and Yukio and I are keeping you from doing what you want to do," she told him.

"I didn't mean it like that…" he tried.

"Why don't you go find Kikyou and you and she can hunt for shards together. She can see them as well as I can so you don't need me around."

She turned to leave and he stood up, intent on stopping her.

"Kagome!"

"Osuwari."

His face hit the hut floor and he was oddly glad.

`Okay, she's sat me and now… now we can make up, right?'

She was walking towards the forest when he caught up to her.

"Kagome! Oi! Wench!"

"Osuwari," she repeated and down he went.

"Gah! Kagome-e-e!"

He picked himself up only to find himself subdued again, repeatedly as she let out a string of sits that dropped him right there in the dirt. The truly frightening thing about it, however, was not that she was pounding his face into the ground. No, he fully expected that and was relieved to get it. The scary part was that there was no anger or emotion in her words. They were just a carefully and deliberately timed series of `osuwari's purposefully designed to make it physically impossible for him to follow her.

"KAGO-O-M-E-E-E!!!"

The last thing he saw through his dust filled, pain-filled eyes was Yukio's little face peering over Kagome's shoulder as she walked out of sight.