Naruto Fan Fiction ❯ The One I Still Loved... ❯ Want... ( Chapter 2 )

A/N: Thanks for all the many reviews. I haven't gotten this many for a single story since FF.Net stopped admitting NC-17 fics (the dirty bastards) Thanks much!

A/N 2: Now READ!!!!

A/N 3: See A/N 2

"Want…"

If there ever was a place that could be considered heaven on earth, I think it would like this. I woke up the next morning, staring up at an incredible sight, looking down at me were the most beautiful green eyes I've ever seen. Sakura gently smiled at me as I was becoming more awake.

My eyes started to roam around my surroundings as I continued to situate myself. My head was currently cradled in her lap. I smiled as I felt the light sensation of her fingers playing with my wild hair. The fact she wasn't wearing anything say for my "Uber Ninja" shirt and noticing my own nakedness, suggested that what happened last night, hadn't been a fantasy.

…And the smile on her face suggested that wasn't a bad thing.

"Morning…" I muttered not knowing what else to say. Then a mild sort of anxiety started to swell within me. What was going to happen now? Were we still friends? Were we lovers? Was last night a one time thing, joyful maybe but destined not to last?

Observing my sudden change and probably guessing where my thoughts lie, I think Sakura made the decision for me. She leaned forward capturing me in surprising upside-down kiss. My mind totally blanked as she a strongly pressed her lips against mine, giving in to the pure emotion.

Then just as suddenly, Sakura sprang back, jolting me out of my euphoria. Her cheeks were a flared red, still flustered from our heated exchange. "We should get some food. I'm starving…" she said, a teasing smirk on her lips.

It took me several seconds to connect what she was saying, I was still spellbound from the kiss, but it didn't take long for things to finally snap into place. "Oh, oh, ok!" I replied launching to my feet and then helping her up as well.

She laughed out loud as I touched her, but I didn't know why. Then she off-handily commented, "Naruto, although I appreciate the view, but you might want to consider putting some pants on…"

<*>

Five minutes later, I (with pants on) joined her in the kitchen and we ate a meager breakfast. It was meager because I hadn't had time to go food shopping so there wasn't much to work with. I ended up giving most of the food I had to her anyway; it would help her get her strength back. She tried to refused, but I wasn't having it. I finished what I had then left out of the room.

I returned, just as she was washing up our dishes. "We should really check your bandages to make sure it's healing ok," I lightly suggested. She sat in silence nodding briefly in agreement. "Also I got a warm bath ready for you. It'll probably loosen up some your muscles."

She didn't say anything in response. At first I thought she didn't hear me then I thought about it, she hardly said a thing while we ate. She kept a very distant look about her, like her thoughts weren't focused on the here and now, but were further down the line. It was as if her mind was strongly contemplating something…What?  I didn't know.

I gently tapped her shoulder, calling her name. Her eyes fluttered quickly shifting to me as if I just spoke. I repeated my previous statement. She looked away, taking a few moments to consider my words. She then gave me a brief, "Ok…" and "Thank you, Naruto…" Then I helped her up and we made our way to the bathroom.

Although, I kept the vestige of my usual bright smile and constant optimistic attitude, I was worried. There was something wrong and she didn't want to tell me. Maybe seeds of regrets were starting to grow within her. Maybe the love she had for Sasuke was resurfacing again and it was devouring all the joy and emotion that we shared last night.

Whatever the cause, I knew I couldn't go back to being "just Naruto" again. Too many things have happened, too many permanent things. I let her in. I let her in deeper than anyone I've ever known. The few times I had with Hinata wasn't anything compared to the pure bliss that flowed through every inch of me when I was holding Sakura…Kissing her…Loving her. It was like for one night everything I've ever hoped and dreamed for happened.

I can't go back. And if she doesn't realize this…I don't know what I'll do…

<*>

Sakura sat quietly on a stool in my bathroom. Her naked, bandaged and patched back was facing me; my 'Uber Ninja' shirt was discarded, tossed in the corner somewhere, while I got ready to inspect her bandages.

Despite the soreness in her body and her leg, she hadn't complained about anymore discomfort, even after I told her the muscle numbing technique I used on her last night had long since wore off. But no discomfort was a good thing. Meaning the ointments and the healing seals I used did their job.

I was all-set to start when I looked at Sakura. There she sat motionless, rigid. Her shoulders braced tightly, her bottom lip firmly tucked under clenched teeth. She looked as if I touched her wrong just once, she would shatter into a thousand pieces that could never be put back together.

This wouldn't do…

"Hey!" I eagerly shouted in a bright cheery tone, the sound of my voice echoing in the small bathroom. Instantly her stern concentration was broken, her eyes searched; now staring at me through the reflection of my mirror. I grinned brightly at her, against her look of confusion. "It's gonna be ok…" I confirmed strongly to her. I placed my hand on her shoulder giving her a gentle squeeze for comfort. She stared back at me then at my hand on her shoulder. Signs of a weak smile somehow found its way to her lips, she then placed her hand overtop of mine. We stayed that way for some time, then she withdrew her hand and I did the same returning to the task at hand. But I did notice she was a lot calmer now.

<*>

In five minutes time, I had all the bandages removed and cleaned up. Sakura didn't experience any discomfort at all. Most of her wounds were mostly closed up. I don't know what was in the healing solutions that Tsunade gave me, but they were amazing. In another day or two they would have all completely healed. I only had to place another type of ointment; this type wouldn't dissolve in water so it would allow her to bathe without worrying about it wearing off.

"Well that's all of it…" I cheered; my voice was then caught in my throat as I quickly averted my eyes away from her. Now that the professional part of my task was finished, reality decided to lend its hand, reminding me that yes; the girl who I think is the most beautiful being in the world is in the same room with me without a hint of clothing on. It also reinstating that I can see every inch and a little bit more of those lovely slender legs that I've dreamed about for years.

It didn't matter the fact last night we had been closer then any two people could possible be. It didn't matter that the look in her eyes, the few times I caught her staring at me, was totally different then when she first came here last night…

What did matter was how badly I wanted to take her in my arms and love her again like we did last night, and how far in the back of my mind I somehow knew she wouldn't be opposed to the idea. Being kissed, licked, caressed… The heat…The sweat our two bodies produced in the thorough passions of…

"I better go…" I abruptly stated. I hurried while putting all the items back in my cabinet. She didn't need an audience while she bathed. And the more distance I placed between the two of us was better.

But it seemed I wouldn't be able to escape that easily. "Naruto…" she whispered. I turned and looked at her, trying desperately to focus solely her face and not on her perky round… "Can you stay?" her cheeks flushed very deeply from the statement. I swear it seemed a minute longer under my scrutiny and the girl's face would almost resemble her rose colored hair. "I mean I'd managed better with you…" she fumbled while saying.  "And…I…" she wouldn't look at me as she spoke.

She's scared… She doesn't want to be alone… She's comfortable when I'm around…

"Ok…"

<*>

With nothing more said between us, I quickly undressed; she then took me by the wrist and pulled me tightly with her over to the bath. Her hold was startled, frighten, as if she was scared at any moment I would bolt out of the room and be halfway across town before she blinked.

Pausing for a second I considered this. I then readjusted her tight hold on me, my hand glided into her fingers, our hands now intertwined. She turned and looked at me. I produced my usual bright smile and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. She blushed, her eyes still on me as we continued.

<*>

I knew Sakura was surprised when she saw my bathtub. Most people bathrooms have the usual modest bathtub. Not mine. I had rather large and I think ungodly looking Jacuzzi. It was a surprise birthday present from Jiraiya when I turned eighteen.

My former teacher had the ingenuity to put in when I was away on a mission. When I came home and saw it the only thing he said was, "Now that you're a man, it's time you invested in these things." He finished his presentation with a claim it was a hundred percent foolproof for getting 'chicks.' From that day forward I've had the locks changed several times to make sure, the old man never brought any more surprises.

God, he's a pervert.

I never got around to getting it removed and after a while I didn't even think about it much, I was more used to showers anyway. But the look on Sakura's face now suggested maybe it would have been a better idea to toss the old thing away. I know she must be questioning my motives.

I gave her a weak almost pleading smile. When I noticed that had no effect, I sighed and just said, "Jiraiya…" Hoping that would explain everything.

Amazingly luck was on my side. Her mode totally changed after that, her eyes rolled in that knowing manner. She was a female in Konoha. Everyone that's a female that lived in Konoha knew all about the lecherous Sanin. The look I was reading from Sakura, Ero-Senin will get a few choice words from her the next time she ran across him, if not a few more lacerations.  

I sat down in the bath first moving to the back of the tub, to allow her some room. Sakura then stepped in following after. I was surprised how hot the water was, especially after how much time had passed. It took us a few minutes to adjust to the heat of the water. Then a few drops of water splashed onto the floor as Sakura rocked back, sliding up against me, leaning her head against my chest. Surprised, my arms went instinctively wrapped around her waist, resting on her smooth stomach.

I smiled as I heard her release pleased sigh. I looked around, her being with me, us being together like this, I couldn't help feeling, this was right. This felt more right then anything I've ever known.

Using a washing sponge, I poured the water over her body. The drops trickled down her slender back down to her round heart-shaped rear. I caught myself staring at her again. God, she was beautiful. I tried to remain in control, mechanical to all the things that was occurring, but it was hard to keep a straight head in these kinda circumstances. All the ninja training in my life, couldn't prepare me for this. I couldn't fathom how anyone could do anything bring harm to her…

"Naruto I'm using you…" she said softly, suddenly. The phrase came so abruptly, that I barely had time to even consider the words.

"What?" I asked her.

She turned around to look at me. Her strawberry colored hair, now darker from it being wet, fell over her eyes till she wiped the strand away. Droplets of water trailed down her front down her firm breasts, but I tried hard not to notice. "I'm using you," she said again. "All of this…" she waved around gesturing to the whole room and then placed her hand over top of mine which was resting on her side, patting it gently. "Even last night was meaningless…" she whispered almost painfully. "All this was just my excuse to escape…"

It finally came out, but I know it would be this way from the start. "I know Sakura-chan…" I still couldn't help calling her that.

Her eyes looked sharply at me. "If you know then why…"

I smiled at her, for all the years she's known me. I thought she would know that answer already. "Because I believe in happy endings…" she stared at me puzzled, but I was far from finished. "…Because I never loose faith. Because I'm the guy that that tries to hold on longer when everyone else wants to fall… It's because, no matter how bad things get I know eventually it will work out. It's who I am; you know I can't fight it," then I looked at her, my hand gently cupping her chin so she can look me in the eyes for my next words. "And because I know, no matter what you may say this wasn't something that was meaningless to you."

She stared long and hard at me, and then I realized that's what was really troubling her, what was terrifying her so much. She still didn't understand how my feelings could still be so sure, so positive, so certain about something she was hardly grasping. I guess she's always had a certain view of what love was. What we had, what I was showing her of me, she'd never experienced before.  She probably didn't know much about the ways of real love, having dreamed about it so much, yet hadn't been shown to her. But I think she was learning and if not I'd spend the rest of my life teaching her.

"You're an idiot you know…" she shot back, but I could tell there was no venom within her tone.

"Well duh!" I replied making a weird face. She looked at me and couldn't help to laugh. Tsunade said it was talent I had, one that was even more powerful then the demon welled up inside me. It was the ability to bring happiness and joy that always seems to inspire others. She said it was something that could rival the mightiest of Ninja techniques and seeing Sakura's smiling face, I think she was right…

"I don't deserve this…" Sakura frowned while looking at me. "I don't deserve you." I started to respond, but she covered my mouth. She wanted to be heard. She continued talking in her sad voice, "All I did when I was younger was convinced myself how much I hated and despised you and how better my life would have been if we were never on the same team." I was speechless. How do you react to the person who you've loved all you're life, telling you there was a time you were everything she loathed and hated. But I would never hold it against her. I realized it still didn't change how I felt about her.

"But now…" she continued, "you've been better to me then anyone else in my whole life." She frowned, "I'm sorry Naruto…"

For a second I pondered her words, but one thing stuck out strongly in my mind. I smiled at her. "Why do you think you don't deserve this?" She stared at me confused. I knew she understood what I was saying, but I decided to elaborate anyway, "You don't think, you deserve to be happy?"

She opened her mouth to say something then clamped it shut. She opened it again to try to retort with something else but again kept quiet. She frowned, a little bit of her lower lip pouting out, she was clearly put out. "I…I…" she feebly tried to say.

"You do…" I answered for her. "You do deserve it…"

Her green eyes set on me once again, softening. "Why didn't I realize you sooner…"

I decided not to answer. It wasn't something I had a place in saying. But the one thing I did know was to never waste time in regret. If you did, you waste so much time in the now, the time you can actually effect. I told her that and she accepted my words in silence.

"Are you happy?" I know the question seemed out of the blue. But in the end it was all that was important to me.
She didn't say anything for a long time. Then she just nestled closer to me and smiled. "I…I think I am…"

<*>

<****>

<*>

After our bath, I now sat on Naruto's bed snuggly wrapped in the warm embrace of his only cotton robe. I continued to sit, slightly amused as I watched him pace back and forth through his closet. He had been trying for fifteen unsuccessful minutes to find something for me to wear. Every so often a new curse would slip from his lips because an article was either too big or too dirty, which would bring another snicker of laugher from me.

It's amazing how quickly fate can alter things…

All of this morning, the only thing that's consumed my thoughts were of the all the sudden changes that have happened in my life in the last twenty four hours. I came here last night because…Because I didn't have any other place to go. Because I knew when no one else would accept me, he would. And he did just like always.

He was the only reliable thing in my life, always being there for me whether I needed it or not. And I think through the years I just expected it. I think before I always took his kindness for granted. I mean I had been used so harshly, so readily in the past, why not use someone else for a change, but last night…Last night was so different.

I saw a new side to him. Or maybe it was always there and I was just too blind to see. His words, his touch, his lips… He made me feel so loved, so beautiful…even when I was clearly at my worst. He made me feel special, like I'm the only thing that's important in his world.

All morning I've tried to convince myself that this was wrong. That wanting to accept him now after everything I put him through wasn't right. I mean Christ, broke his heart so many times when I was younger it would be impossible to keep count. I used to tell him on a daily basis that I hated him, sometimes several things worst. But that never deterred him, because he had blind faith alone that maybe someday things would change.

Seeing him now, even as he's acting in his outlandish Naruto way, I finally see him for what he really is. Everything that I tried to envision Sasuke to be, Naruto was. Everything I needed in my life, he was so willing to give me and so much more.

So the only thing that keeps resurfacing in my mind is; why do I want to continue push to him away when all he wanted was to be close to me? Am I afraid? Afraid, he'll be a fraud like the affection I assumed I was given from Sasuke. Afraid, that the only person that constantly says he loves me is nothing but a fantasy? But I know that will never be. His eyes…Even when he his lips say his love for me, his eyes do too.

So why am I denying something we both so dearly want?

I can't…I can't fight it anymore. I know…I realize that I want him…I want him so bad…

This wasn't some lust crazed want or pure wanton desire that's triggering this feeling.

I want him…in my life and in my heart. I want to care for him and protect him, like he's always done for me. I want to hold him, caress him, to see his bright smiling face whenever I turn.

I'm not sure if this is love that I'm feeling, all I know is the only person I want is him.

<*>

Acting on my need, my want, I left my position on his bed. My bare feet make light pattering sounds as I moved across the floor behind him. I could tell he sensed my movement, but I wasn't trying to conceal my actions.

 I placed my hand on his broad back, instantly he tensed his strong toned body feeling hot to the touch. Things then felt as if they moved in slow motion as he turned, his sparkling blue eyes settling on me. The hints of a question were on his lips, but it fell away when he saw the look in my eyes.

But what do I say?

In all my life things have never been more clearer than in this moment, but what do I say that can describe all that? All that I'm feelings and all that I'm feeling for him…

I closed my eyes and let a voice from inside me speak those words. "I only want you…" she said, we said.

"Sakura…" his voice trembled. He was confused, maybe even scared. But I wasn't scared, not anymore.

"I want only you, Naruto…" I whispered to him. I reached up-When did he get taller then me?-and kissed him so lightly, so strongly, I felt us both tremble. I felt his hands searching along my body. My hands were searching along his. It was a wild exhilaration for the both of us, so intense and hot. I didn't even feel the impact of when we hit the bed.

We both thrived and thrashed along the bed, our lips raking and raining kisses on each other. I managed to pin him underneath me, but that didn't secure my dominance. My God, it felt like his hands were everywhere, caressing me, touching me in all the places that I so wanted to be touched. His touch alone was setting my body on fire.

My hands snaked around him tightly as he drew up lacing me with another fervent kiss. He kissed me deeply again, his hands pulling way my robe. He then paused; I could see my own reflection in his shimmering blue eyes, when he stopped. The way he looks, touches, holds me…Why didn't I notice this before?

I ran my fingers along his glistening chest. "I love you…" he whispered into my ear.

 "I know…" I quietly answered back. I rested my head on his shoulder. This was all I wanted in life. To be with the man that meant more to me then anyone else, have him and to know that he loves me truly. That was my only wish.

There was a lot I learned that afternoon while we made love. I always used to think my breasts were too small, not full enough, even Sasuke said that from time to time. But the way his eyes were looking at me, the way he worshiped my breasts with his lips and his touch, I've never thought they could be more perfect. I never thought anyone could see me, as being perfect. But he did.

It was several hours into the afternoon when we finally stopped. We just held each other softly talking. In those hours that we talked I learned more about Naruto then in all the years I've known him.

A little after when it started to get dark, we ordered some food then returned to our den of his bed and eventually made love again. This time was more intense, more powerful. It was as if we were trying to see who could bring the other to climax first, which ultimately resulted in us achieving the most powerful orgasm, I've ever had.

"I'm gonna marry you one day…" he said to me during the middle of the night. His vowed was branded with a bright smile. It was a pledge I remember him making several times, when we were younger, sometimes several times in the same day. It usually, would send me into a screaming frenzy. Shouts about how ugly and disgusting, he was and several other hurtful things that I never would care to mention. But his resolve was firm and somewhere deep down inside I think he knew I was flattered.

And now, the thought didn't seem so farfetched. "I want you to…" I softly replied and nestled my head on his chest, listening to the reverberating sound of his strong heartbeat.

There was talk about getting my things from the Uchiha household. But I didn't care anymore. That was an old life, something I greatly wanted to forget. This new life that I'm daring to embark, I know that everything won't be easy, but I know the both of us can do it.

<*>

The next morning…

"Sakura, I'm going out to get some groceries, do you need anything in particular?"

"Maybe some new shampoo and some more fruit…"

"Ok, I should be back in an hour or so..."

"Okay hurry back…"

The door parted slightly, "Sasuke!"

****

A/N: Hello everyone again. I'm glad to see many of you share my loathing for the Uchiha clan's youngest brat. And the rest of you that spoke for Sasuke…I understand totally, he did his Sharingan thing on all of you forcing you to say those things about him. I understand fully.

I only have one real comment to make. Someone commented on how bad Sasuke's life was and that was an excuse for his behavior. (Sigh) The only thing I have to say to that is this, granted his whole family was murder by another member that's a terrible thing and I don't fault him for that or hold that against him. But please keep in mind there was another kid in Konoha, who never had any family what so ever. Had everyone that ever looked at him resent him for reasons he didn't know till he was twelve yet, he still has better disposition then the lone savior of the Uchiha clan.

It's possible to be a loner all your life and not be a total prick. Things to keep in mind…

Also I'll let everyone know, when I have a strong dislike for any character it's always with good reason.

Anyway! I read a really good Naru/Saku lemon and for some strange perverted reason its not on AFF.net anyway it's called "Something or Other: First and Only" by Geno Calamari. Dude is real good, it's on MediaMiners.org but I'm gonna try to email the guy and have him post it on here. There aren't too many Naru/Saku lemons, a tragedy in itself, it's really a shame for the rest of you not to read it.

One more chapter and it's the big confrontation. How will it end? Who knows! Well I do, but the rest of you…Never mind!

Ja ne!