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by Time Lady
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The Scene: an empty theater. The stage is set with a desk, a computer, and a large screen.

Tai: You got the scripts?

Davis: [patting pocket] Right here. But are you sure she's not going to freak out or something?

Tai: Nah. She'll thank us for doing it for her.

Ken: [walks in carrying a video camera] I don't know how I let you guys talk me into this.

Davis: We need someone who knows how the program works, and Izzy is sort of tied up at the moment.

[Backstage, we see Izzy tied and gagged. Ken shrugs and sits down at the computer. He begins fiddling with the program.]

Tai: All right. Let's see what the script calls for. . .

[Davis hands Tai the scripts. He spends a couple of minutes looking through them.]

Tai: You're kidding, right? This is what she had planned?

Davis: [shrugging] I guess. I didn't really read over them.

Tai: [tosses script over shoulder] Heck with it. We'll wing it.

Ken: [looks up from the monitor] Are you guys sure about this?

Tai: Absolutely. She'll thank us for this later. Umm. . . who's going to run the camera?

Ken: If you want me to run the computer, I am _not_ going to be the cameraman as well.

Tai: I'd ask Agumon to do it, but last time he used Kari's camera he melted it.

Davis: How about Veemon?

Tai: Perfect! You go get him while I make some changes to the script.

Davis: Right.

[About twenty minutes later, Davis is explaining to Veemon how to use the video camera.]

Davis: You sure you can handle it?

Veemon: I just push the button, then point the camera at whoever is talking.

Davis: [gives Veemon the thumbs up] You got it. Ready Tai? Ken?

Tai: Ready.

Ken: Leave my name out of this. . .

Davis: OK Veemon, start the camera.

Tai: Hi everyone. This is Tai. . .

Davis: . . . and Davis. . .

Tai: With Time Lady's "Guide to Writing Summaries."

[Tai holds up a piece of paper with "Time Lady's Guide to Writing Summaries" written on it. Veemon zooms in on the paper, then moves back to Tai.]

Tai: We're here to help all the bewildered people out there who are having trouble writing summaries of their fanfics. First off, let's see what _not_ to do.

[Out of camera range, Ken types away on the computer. A summary appears on the screen. It reads "This story sux, but re anywas."]

Davis: Okay, let's take a look at this.

Tai: First off, spelling counts.

Davis: Yeah. If you're going to rip into your own story before anyone's read it, at least spell it right.

Tai: Second, look at what the person is saying. They're making our decision for us. Now this could be an appeal for pity.

Davis: Or, it can be a warning flag for people to not even bother reading it. I mean, who wants to read a story that sucks? If you're telling me it sucks, why would I want to waste my time?

Tai: Yeah. And this doesn't tell me what the story is about. The writer is basically telling me not to read the story.

Davis: Let's see another summary.

[Ken taps a few keys. The next summary reads "I don't like writing summaries. Just read my story."]

Davis: You know what I say to that?

Tai: No. What do you say to that?

Davis: If the writer went through all the trouble writing the story and can't give me a taste of it, I'm not gonna read it.

Tai: Good for you. The summary is there for reason. It's there to catch the reader. No summary, no reader. That simple. Here's another example of what not to do.

[The screen shows the words "Just a _little_ different."]

Davis: Huh? What's that supposed to mean?

Tai: I have _no_ idea. I guess the writer was hoping the title would be a draw. Who knows?

Davis: Well, I don't. And I'm not going to read it. [He crosses his arms on his chest.]

Tai: How about this?

[The screen reads "This is a Mimato" and nothing else.]

Davis: So it's a Mimato. So? What else is going to make me want to read this? Does the writer think I'm going to read it just because it's a Mimato?

Tai: Apparently he or she does. If you're telling someone it's a Mimato and not saying anything else, are you afraid to tell me what it's about or something? I got news for you. You're not going to attract anyone who's not a Mimato reader with that. You've just chopped your audience down. Let's see the next one.

[Ken pulls up the next review: "^_^ me again...*sigh* I should be working on the fics I've already started but....oh well it's an AU..... *YAOI*.....*new chap added*"]

Tai: Now this one isn't too bad. It does have a few good points. The author at least cares enough to say that it's AU. . .

Davis: AU?

Tai: Alternate Universe.

Davis: Maybe they shouldn't abbreviate. Not everyone knows what the letters stand for.

Tai: Good point. They've also posted a Yaoi warning. That'll not only attract Yaoi fans, but it will warn off those people who are against it.

Davis: That should cut down on the flames. They also said they added a new chapter. So what's wrong with this review?

Tai: They still say nothing about the story. Who cares that they should be working on other fics? That kind of stuff should go into the author's notes at the end of the story instead of in the summary. Reject!

Davis: Hey, enough with the bad stuff. I want to see something that's going to make me want to read the story already!

Tai: Okay. Let's see what to do to attract all those people that you want to review your fanfic.

Davis: Cheap shameless plug time. If you need help with a review, read "Guide to Reviewing with Cody and Izzy."

Tai: ^^; Yeah. Right. Okay. [He pulls over a chair, turns it around, and sits on it backwards.] First thing is get major warnings done up front. I don't mean couple warnings, or even yaoi/yuri warnings. I'm talking _heavy_ stuff. I mean the stuff that are really going to turn people off. Not everyone checks the story rating. So if there's extreme violence, death, rape, or other nasty stuff going on, warn everyone up front.

Davis: It kind of helps if the word warning is in all caps, right?

Tai: Sure does. Here's a great example.

[The screen then reads: "WARNING*** This fic is has violence in it...that incules killing, and other acts of violence that would be considered really disgusting...if your about that kind of stuff this fic isn't the best for you. At the beging it's okay untill it hits chapter 3.TK, Sora, Tai, Matt and Joe surive a horrible plane crash in the Amazon rain forest...and are determinded to get home...execpt many obstacles stand in there way."]

Davis: [winces] Whoa, man, did someone forget to use their spell checker?

Tai: Other than the spelling errors, this is a really good example of a warning review. They're hammering that warning into the reader about any violence. They also do a good job of showing the next part. The reason this whole thing is called a summary, the summary!

Davis: [whispers to Ken] Hey, can you do some flashy stuff on the computer to go with this?

Ken: [glares at Davis, then whispers back] It's not like I had any time to plan or prepare this stuff.

Davis: Okay, don't get so touchy.

Tai: Will you two keep it down? Ahem. . . The author used two sentences and gave enough information about the story without giving the whole thing away. If it wasn't for the spelling errors, I'd probably really consider reading this one. What about you guys?

Ken: [grumbles] Leave me out of this.

Davis: I'd at least give it a look-see. Maybe they did use spell check in the story.

Veemon: Hey guys, you know, they don't have spell check on those summary thingies. What can someone do?

Tai: I'm glad you asked.

Davis: Hey, hold the camera straight!

Tai: ^^; Well, if you have a lot of spelling and grammar problems, you can always type the summary in a program that does, check your spelling, then cut and paste it into the summary entry box.

Davis: Hey, how did you learn so much about this stuff?

Tai: Hang around with Izzy long enough and something's bound to stick to your memory.

Davis: What if you're not putting in a warning?

Tai: Making a summary still follows the same idea. In one or two sentences, tell the reader enough about the story to make them want to read it, but not enough to ruin the story for them. Remember that person who wrote "This is a Mimato" before?

Davis: I was trying not to.

Tai: Our next example promos the Mimato with a little more.

[Instead of the simple words appearing, "Mimato fanfic. Matt gets depressed and feels horrible about himself. How can Mimi change his mind? Please R&R" zooms in from a distance.]

Davis: Whoa. . . cool!

Ken: I did something fancy. Now leave me alone.

Tai: This person is not only telling me that it's a Mimato, but they're also telling me what the story is about. They could have left off the "Please R&R" though. Sounds like they're begging. Don't sound desperate for reviews. If they like it, they'll review. And if they hate it badly enough, they'll review too. Though the results won't be as pleasant.

Davis: Yeah. By asking for reviews, you can really be "asking for it."

Tai: The last part of the review is optional. That's the couplings. Telling the readers what couples your story has is a double edged sword. Why? Some people read their stories only if it has certain couples. On the other hand, some people won't read a story at all if it contains particular couples.

Veemon: So why bother?

Tai: Two reasons. First of all, some people won't read a story unless they know who the couples are going to be. Second, if someone reads the story and hates the couple with a passion, they might flame you big time. Not pleasant. But then, some people don't care about the response, so they choose to leave the readers guessing. I wouldn't recommend forgetting tags for Yaoi, Yuri, and crossbreeding though. It could be hazardous to your health.

Davis: Gotcha. So how about we see some reviews with all the right stuff going for them?

Tai: Right. Here's a really good example of a review.

[ "Takeru becomes trapped in the world of darkness, and it's up to his older brother Yamato to find a way to bring him back before he's lost for good... Yaoi. Taito. Some bad language" spirals across the screen, then bounces a couple of times before stopping.]

Tai: It's only a couple of sentences, but it tells me enough about the story to want to read it. . . it also has a couple of small warnings at the end, with a couples note. ["Be careful what you say, even to the one you love. Because before you know it, that person might not love you anymore... or maybe she never did in the first place. (A Takari, with Patatail, Daiyako, and slight Yamara.)" slides across the screen and screeches to a stop.] Same thing here. The sentences make you want to read the story.

Veemon: Yeah, but some people stink at writing those two sentences.

Tai: Start with something simple. Like, in one sentence, tell me what this whole lecture has been about.

Davis: Oh, that's easy. "Tai and Davis do a guide to help you write better summaries."

Veemon: That's all?

Tai: It can be enough. Or you can try and write something a little fancier.

[The screen flashes different colors. Then one by one, the following words fade in "Having trouble writing summaries? Here is a little guide to help you along."]

Veemon: Man, you're good.

Tai: Veemon, will you watch the camera? You're aiming up my nose [glare]

Veemon: Oops, sorry.

Ken: I think I have one. "What happens when two Digidestined steal a script, con their friends into helping, and try to make their own video out of the script?"

Tai: What does that have to do with this fic?

Veemon: I'd say it has a _lot_ to do with this fic.

[Veemon aims the video camera off to the side of the stage. There we see Time Lady with a rather noticeable eye twitch and an extremely large mallet. Wisps of steam seem to be coming from her head. Behind her is Izzy, who has managed to get untied and Cody, who discovered and untied Izzy.]

Davis: Uh oh. . . we're doomed. . .

Tai: [nervously getting off his chair] Ah um this concludes Time Lady's Guide to Writing Summaries. The next guide will be. . . [swallows hard]

Time Lady: [raising mallet] The next guide will be kept under lock and key before production.

Davis: Well, gotta go!

Tai: Bye!

[Veemon films Tai and Davis being chased by Time Lady, Cody, and Izzy.]

Ken: Maybe a chase scene _would_ liven this thing up.

-The End-