Crossover Fan Fiction / Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ Tri-Saber ❯ The Needle Nogin and the Padawan ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Light: [Dressed in Jedi Robes with a smile on his face] Greetings and welcome to the strangest idea me and a friend of mine came up with…bear with me on this and let’s see if you can handle the concept. Vash the Stampede, The $$60,000,000,000 Man, The Humanoid Typhoon and all around good guy as a Jedi Master… [Hears several million people facefault] looks like I wasn’t the only one when Eric and me thought this up. Ok here’s the Disclaimer I, Light, hereby do not claim ownership of either Trigun or Star Wars. [Now begging] Please don’t sue me GL you’ll get nothing from me except maybe a few DVD’s now for setting I’m taking an AU of Episode III Revenge of the Sith and I will end up in the classic trilogy (after a huge chunk of the Trigun plot).


Tri-Saber
(A Trigun/Star Wars Fusion)

Chapter 1
Needle Noggin and the Padawan


A turbo lift opens to the central chamber of the Jedi Temple on Coursant. The lift opens and a green robed teenager about 19 with brown hair and light brown eyes steps out and look around. His gate screams out Corellian as well as his attitude. “OHHHHHHHHHHHH LIGHT!!!!!!” came a shrill familiar annoying voice broke the clam that was the Jedi temple.

Light shuddered as a man with spiked up blonde hair in robe signifying him a Jedi Master came running toward him from a bench. “Yes Master Vash?” he said as Vash came to a screeching halt.

Vash smiled a really cheesy smile and said, “HOW ARE YOU,” smacking Light on back, knocking him back a few meters, “doing today?”

Light stood up somewhat dazed, “I'm fine master I was on my way to Master Yoda's for his class.” He said looking in several directions for an escape route from the moronic Jedi Master.

Vash ignored everything past ‘I’m fine’ and says, “REALLY, say...wanna hear a joke??”

Light blanched at Vash’s attempt to Shanghai him he answered, “No but that's not gonna stop you from telling it.” Bracing for what is his fate.

“Wanna know why the Rancor crossed the road?” Vash says trying not to laugh at his own joke.

Light winced and said, “No why did the Rancor cross the road?”

“CAUSE it WANTED TOO!” Vash said as he fell down laughing hard.

Light raises an eyebrow saying to nobody in particular, “And this guy is a Jedi master”

Vash completely ignorant of Light’s commits keeps on telling his bad jokes, “Hey, do you why Yoda has a walking stick?”

Light responded sarcastically, “I don't know maybe because he's over 800 years old”

Vash countered with an enthusiastic, “NO!!!! So he can get handicapped PARKING!” laughing at his own joke.

Wincing at the bad pun Light said to Vash, “That's nice but I really need to get to Master Yoda.” With that he turned and left all the while muttering, “What a moron.”

Vash followed along closely “Wait, wait wait wait wait....STOP ME if you heard this one!!!”

Light was visibly annoyed with the stupid Jedi Master “Yes and why are you following me anyway?”

Ignoring the question Vash responds “You know Yoda has many pick up lines”

Light moves quickly down the hall, Yoda's class is coming into sight. Seeing sanctuary he moves faster, “No how many pick up lines does Yoda have”

“I really don't know” Vash said before going into a bad Yoda impression, “Bend over and show me your dark side!!!” He laughs at his own joke while running and runs into a column.

Light chuckles at the imprint Vash left on the column, “Now that is funny” with that he continues toward Yoda's class.

Light gets to the class the doors slide open as he nears them, “Thank the force” he says as he enters

As he enters he finds Yoda staring at him. Light moved toward the short Jedi Master and bows, “Master Yoda you wished to see me”

Yoda nodded and said, “Become a Padawan you will”

That came as a surprise to Light. “To who Master Yoda, Master Windu isn't taking Padawan’s anymore sense the war has started, though Master Obi-Wan is free but I’m not sure if he’d take me after some of the stuff I pulled when he was just starting out as a Jedi Master,” still slightly out of it as he continues to list off the current roster of Jedi Masters still alive from the Clone Wars.

Yoda nods at that “Emmmrrrrgghh yes, yet Padawan you are, Master you need” he said as he lifted his staff to point toward door as it opens and Vash falls face first on the floor rolling a couple times screaming to stop the ride. “He'll be your Padawan, Master Vash”

Light has a dumbfounded look as he blinks a couple times look back at Vash then at Yoda, “You mean I'm paired up with needle noggin here!” he said completely in shock.

Vash quickly scrambles to his feet and stands up back completely straight. “YES SIR, Master Yoda” he said as he dissolves into tears grabbing Light in a hug, “This is the HAPPIEST day of my LIFE!” And he begins to cry rather loudly.

Yoda winces as the sound of something cracking can be heard from light his ears fall down a bit as he said, “Light, Vash your master is”

Light feeling his bones cracking said. “What...did...I...do...to...deserve...this?” His face turned blue as he started to have trouble breathing “Master...I...can't...breathe!”

Vash didn’t hear his Padawan’s pleas as he was soaking Lights shirt with his tears. “I'm SO HAPPY!!!!” He lets go and sets his sights on Yoda as he runs to hug diminutive Jedi Master “oh Master Yoda!!!!”

Quickly, Yoda holds up his staff “Hugs enough that is Vash”

Cringing at his now wet shirt Light said, “And I just washed this shirt”

Vash on the other had is so happy that he falls on knees repeatedly bowing to Yoda, “Oh thank you Master Yoda, you do me such honor!!!”

The young Corellian looked at Vash in irony he said to himself “And this is the Jedi Typhoon?”

With Yoda’s hearing (hey those ears aren’t for show you know) looks at Light and nods and said to Vash, “Errrmmmm yes, yes, yes, now Vash, Light's training must begin.”

Vash still giddy over getting a Padawan Learner quickly jumps to feet and in a mock tough voice he said, “Why yes Master Yoda, Light will be the best Jedi knight...EVER.”

Light muttered to himself, “I wish I could be stuck a saner Jedi Master.”

“Come Light,” Vash said as he turns on heel, “we have many things to do!!!” he continues as his annoying laugh began as he inches his way out the door “LATER!”

Light looked down defeated, “Yes master” he sighed and follows Vash.

Yoda watches the door close after Light finally leaves, “Some destiny that boy has. Stay sane I hope he does.”

A Hologram stepped out of the shadows revealing Ben “Obi-Wan” Kenobi said, “He will make it I’m sure of it he’s the last chance against the Darth Siddious.” He smiled slightly as he thought, Serves him right at least, “Although Master Yoda why in the Force did you assign Master Vash to be his Master? Even his actions didn’t warrant that kind of a punishment.”

“In time all will be revealed Master Obi-Wan.” With that said Obi-Wan’s transmission faded and ended leaving Yoda by himself again, “Danger there will be soon.” He said as he felt a disturbance in the force, “Leave now to face Darth Siddious I must.” And slowly he left the room.

* * *

The newly paired Master and Padawan finally manage to get back to the main lobby, even though. “...And the Third one DUCKS!” Laughing hysterically as Vash hasn't stopped with the jokes, much too every ones disappointment.

Light was trying desperately to ignore the jokes he felt several Knights wince in pity for him having to put up with the flaky Jedi Master, “Please master enough with the jokes they aren't funny.” He pleaded.

Vash while still laughing said, “I need some donuts”

Suddenly every knight and padawan in the temple felt something approaching; the feeling was off almost like most Jedi felt when in contact with Clone troopers during the clone wars. Light having felt this sensation the least of all the other padawan learner’s in the temple, felt also a sense of foreboding, “Something is coming!” he said reaching his Lightsaber.

Even Vash stops laughing as the sound of repulser lifts can be heard approaching the temple. Also in the distance a faint sound of a Lightsaber cutting something down, knowing danger as well as Vash does go tense as he prepared to pounce on someone or something.

Light turned to his master noticing the difference in posture, “Master?” he asked, “What is it?”

All the Jedi around, stop and listen as the repulser lifts hover over the Temple. Vash who was just in the dark as the rest of the Jedi in the Temple said to his padawan learner “I don't kn…” before he could finish an explosion rocks the building, causing him to emit another one of his girly screams and dives under a bench.

Light shook his head in disbelief and ignites his Lightsaber. With a familiar snap-hiss a sliver-blue blade emerges as another explosion rocks the temple, the Jedi begin to run, to find shelter and to attempt to repel invaders.

Vash clung together hiding under the bench he’s hiding under finally lets out, “I'm to HANSOME to die!!!”

“Oh, Pipe down Needle Noggin,” Light said as he takes an offensive stance, “I'm ready for it” he continued letting the force fill him as the next explosion blows a hole in the roof of the chamber, debree rains down.

Vash just complained, “It's NOT FAIR!” as another girly scream erupted from the Jedi Master just as clones pore into the hole. While there armor is similar to that the clone troopers wore in the clone wars the most identifiable difference was the helmet instead of a T-shaped visor was replaced with two round tented lenses. They open fire apron the Jedi as they step through the hole they blasted through.

Light just stood his ground deflecting blaster bolts that headed toward him and the moronic Jedi Master, “Master will you just SHUT UP!” nearly screaming at the spiky haired Jedi Master while still attempting to defend where they were.

Some of the other Jedi ignite their sabers to aid in the defense, some fall back as the blaster fire starts getting thick, almost too much to block, the troopers set up and deployed e-web heavy blasters around the main lobby of the Temple.

Light was to amazed at the sheer number of troopers that were filing into the temple firing at the remaining Jedi, all that while blocking some of the blaster fire that came him and Vash’s way. “Has someone betrayed the order?” he asked to himself, “Could it be him?”

All the while Light is deflecting as many Blaster bolts as he can, Vash was scampering out from the bench and crab steps from debree to debree screaming the whole time as blaster fire zings everywhere

Light, looking tired from the constant use of the force, “Are you just gonna stand there like a nerf with his head cut off?” He asked in between breaths, “Or are you gonna help me save our asses,” he finished as a blaster bolt blows right by his head narrowly missing him. Light relaxes some as he sees another Jedi running interference as some children, young padawan from Yoda’s classes, “Master my ship is in the hanger here get the kids to safety I'll cover your escape and if I'm not back in 20 minutes take off with out me and head for the uncharted regions of space they'll be safe there for awhile.”

“Huh???” was all Vash could say as the lone knight came up to him.

“Protect the younglings!!!” he said as he activated his saber and let his green blade join in the defense Light was putting up, “Make sure they get out of here there’s a Jedi with the soldiers slicing down any Younglings and Jedi he sees.

Light smiled as he said “Master Vash can take care of them,” while adding mentally, I hope he can. “Who is the Jedi with them?”

“It’s Jedi Knight Skywalker.” The knight said as he pushed through the line of enemy fire only to be gunned down by the heavy concentration of fire

As he was thinking over the revelation a concussion grenade flies by Light and explodes, killing a few of the kids, one of the bodies lands next to Vash's quivering form. Vash just stares blankly at the copse.

“Damn them,” Light curses as he tightens up his defense swearing in several different language, most notable were Rodian and Huttese and one rare Wookiee curse that took everyone there by storm, how he got it sounding right was something to be impressed with.

“Stop right there Anderson…” A commanding voice shot out as the troopers stopped shooting and parted ways as a tall man in maroon robes with black leather on top his long hair flowing in his gloved hand he was holding a blue bladed lightsaber, he turned to a trooper holding a com link, “Good work commander now stay back. He’s mind,” he said to the troopers.

“Anakin Skywalker,” Light said as he tightened his grip on his saber, “so you betrayed the order like my cousin did.”

“You don’t understand why I’m doing this,” Anakin shot back his temper in full force; “Padme’s life is at risk if I don’t help Siddious.”

Vash, still out of it, tenderly touches the dead child and freezes in place.

Light spat at Anakin, the one person he befriended sense coming here to the Temple years ago. The only person besides a few Jedi Masters who even know his real name. “Her life is at risk working with Siddious.” He finished before a glimmer from Anakin’s thoughts entered his mind, “Your thoughts betray your master, Anakin, or should I call him Palpatine.”

Anakin looked at him as he steeled himself, “So be it Andy.”

“I don’t want to fight you Ani,” Light said as he prepared himself, “but you leave me no choice but to defend myself.”

With that Anakin charged with a viscous high chop that Light barley caught in time with his own saber the collision of the two blades sent sparks flying through the air.

Light tried to go for a low sweep only to be countered by Anakin’s blade, “So…Anakin” Light said as their blades clashed against the other, “what name did Palpatine give you.”

Anakin who pulled back and prepared to attack again, “Darth Vader is what he calls me now,” his eyes narrowed as he attacked again this time going into a series of high speed slashes and slices towards the young padawan. Light was barely able to keep with him, nearly losing an arm once or twice.

Light, sweating heavily yelling to the kids as he holds Vader back, “There's an old Corellian YT-1000 in the hanger I want you to head there as fast as you can for that ship. It's my personal ship Master Vash will accompany you.”

The Kids begin to run but the Stormtroopers are almost totally on top of the younglings with Vash as he slowly gets to his feet and calmly says, “Get the children out of here Light.” Tears are rolling down his face but his eyes and features were poised with a fire and determination never seen by the young Corellian padawan.

The saber duel halted in its tracks Light, shocked by the expression from Vash exclaimed, “Master!”

Anakin eyes widen when Light acknowledged Vash as his master, Oh great, he thought, “I wouldn’t wish that on anybody” he muttered to himself as he felt something shifting in the force.

Vash slowly turns slowly to face the surrounding troops and yelled, “I said,” as a single tear falls down his face, “there will be; no more death!!!”

The force goes still that both Light and Anakin stop and take notice of the sudden change “Is this the same man I saw earlier cracking bad jokes?” Light asked himself.

Vash, with a determined look on his face holds out his hand “NO MORE!!!” he yelled as every blaster bolts coming in the direction of him and the Younglings freeze in midair, “run younglings,” he ordered crisply

Anakin was in shock at the display of power Vash was putting forth, “This can’t be real,” he said to himself as he made his escape as the Younglings head for the spaceship hanger.

Light as well was to stunned to move, his eyes widened as he came to the realization, “I can't even feel him in the living force”

“Yes, witness the power of the force, my young Padawan” Vash says as he draws his Lightsaber disappearing briefly before reappearing in the middle of the stunned Stormtroopers. He ignited his Lightsaber, a blade pure white sprang forth “now DIE!” he yells as he begins to cut the troopers down one by one.

Light watched in slight awe with widen eyes “he can't be human!” he says as he starts shaking, “why am I afraid of him all the sudden?”

Vash without turning and looking at his padawan he yelled, “RUN! I will be with you shortly.” As Vash using the force closes his fist and Stormtroopers crumble in their armor blood oozes from the crushed body armor.

Light slightly dumbfounded just nods and runs to the hanger somewhat disturbed over what happened.

A violent explosion follows Light as he runs like hell to his ship and up the open gangplank and heads for the cockpit to start the preflight. From his spot in the cockpit he can see Vash suddenly appears running up the gangplank, “let's GO!” he yelled as he shuts the airlock hatch as another explosion rocks the ship. His face falls on the floor from the vibration he lets out a shrill scream and says, “I hate explosions.”

Light shakes his head starts the preflight for the ship, “What in the hell are you Vash and why do you act like a scruffy looking nerf herder most of the time yet just now you were cold as durasteel.” A whine from the engines signified that the ship finished its pre-flight routines.

Vash grabbing onto a child, “I want to go home!” he says as the child he’s holding starts to cry, and it wasn’t before long that Vash starts crying as well.

Light opened the Hanger hatch with a coded transmission as he turned on the PA system and announced, “Hold on kids were busting out of this place. If we survive the artily will be fine I've changed flight plan where heading toward Corellia I know someone there that can help to hide the younglings” with that said he switches off the PA system and eases the throttle controls to 1/4 power and eases out of the hanger and guns it for the atmosphere.

The ship roars out of the hanger as small arms blaster fire came from the Strom troopers stationed allover the Temple, and turns for atmosphere.

Light was shocked as his ship, the Luck’s Enchantment, left the atmosphere to find that there were no ships currently in orbit. “What in the galaxy is going on here why isn't there any ships in orbit here?”

Vash haphazardly stumbles in to the cockpit, “Are we safe?” he asked as he sits down in the co-pilots seat and looks around nervously as Light flies the Luck's Enchantment out of Coursant's Gravity well before noticing a coded transmission from Senator Bail Organa’s personal ship the Tantive IV.

Vash grabs a hold of Light as he starts entering data in the navigation computer, “I hate flying and I hate Lightspeed!”

Light, sighed at his fate in the universe and said, “But master how are we gonna get anywhere with out going to Lightspeed”

Vash's scream, echoes in the cockpit as the Luck's Enchantment, elongates and enters hyperspace

***

Palpatine’s Office, Galactic Senate, Coruscant, Galactic Empire

“Welcome back Lord Vader,” Said now Emperor Palpatine.

Anakin took a knee in front of his dark master, “What is thy bidding my master?”

Palpatine smirked, “You are to go to Mustafar and wipe out the Separatist Leaders.” He said before continuing, “The Senate must never find out that it was I who was behind the Separatists movement.”

“As you wish my master,” With that said Anakin stood up and exited the office..

End Chapter 1

Light: so what do you think? C&C is much appreciated; I have plans to cover the entire classic trilogy once I get though the main set up of the Trigun suitation. If you want to talk ideas with me or just hear what I got planed you can e-mail me at light_avatar_chaos at yahoo dot com or Yahoo IM with light_avatar_chaos or on AIM with lightanimefreak.

Next Time: Light and Vash meet with Obi-Wan and Yoda on the Tantive IV and get there marching orders. Can Light and Vash handle being decoys while Obi-Wan and Yoda go into hiding find out next time in Tri-Saber Chapter 2: Space Chase to Corellia, the Luck Enchantment is the Decoy.