Digimon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ *~The TAD Fics~* ❯ Togepi Falls a Tad bit in Love ( Chapter 7 )

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Pokémon, the song "Chocolate salty balls" or the song "Ms Jackson" I also don't own the right to make the characters do the things they do in this fic....they chose to do that on their own!

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Please, please, Please, don't hate me cos of the content of this fic...I dunno what got into me...the humor in these tad fics seem to be getting cruder! (*sigh*) This is the result of reading those "Unaired episode" fics by Zelda and probably the result of South park too....(*Screams*) MY MIND HAS BEEN CORRUPTED (*shrugs*) Oh well never mind it's still funny if this is your kinda humor. Enjoy!

TOGEPI FALLS A TAD BIT IN LOVE
By Togepi

This fanfic starts eight years from the johto journeys, It's night and the twerp trio are having a camping trip out in the Viridian forest, of course they were probably lost but who cares about that?

Togepi's bloodshot eyes shot wide open as more assorted screams and giggles came from the only tent the twerps had brought along. The egg wearily looked up at the green tent then glanced at Tracey, Brock and Pikachu who were roasting marshmallows.

"They're at it again" Togepi moaned as he put his tiny arms over his invisible ears. "Please make the noise stop I need to get sleep, I can't think of plans for world domination if this carries on"

"Togepi, they're in love..." Brock replied with a huge smirk on his face. "...it's what people do when they're in love"

"Yeah but do they have to do it seven times in one night" he sighed back. Brock, Tracey and Pikachu just grinned at each other.

"I think it's sweet" said Tracey.

"Of course you would..." snapped Togepi. "...your a complete wuss"

Tracey began to sulk at Togepi's harsh comment when Misty popped her head out of the tent.

"Hey Brock..." she said. "...could you pass us the lotion please"

Then Ash popped his head out.

"And the whipped cream as well Brock"

Then Gary popped his head out.

"And some cherries"

Brock gathered the items but then dropped them all in shock of seeing Gary in the same tent as Ash and misty.

"Palletshipping, Pokéshipping and egoshipping in the same tent..." said a confused Togepi. "...Is that legal"

"Probably not" Gary snapped back. "But the fanfic writer wants to get as many shippy things in this story as possible just for the fun of it...now pass us those cherries"

Then Richie, Duplica, Mondo and Todd the snap photographer dude popped their heads out.

"We've decided we want Strawberries not cherries" Ritchie said.

"You heard the guy Brock..." Gary snapped. "...now get your punk ass in gear and get us those strawberries"

Brock just sighed got the items and gave them to the large group in the tent as quickly as he could so they could get back to what they were doing.

After that Brock sat back down in between Tracey and Pikachu. A very long silence followed between those three and Togepi. A strong wind blew and a few tumbleweeds passed by. Then Tracey turned towards Brock.

"Wanna go in those bushes and do things?" he asked.

"Okay" replied Brock as they both walked off into the bushes. poor Togepi just watched them with the most puzzled look on his face.

"What are they gonna do?" Then suddenly Brock's Orange shirt flew out of the bush. Togepi watched it as the shirt landed by his feet, it was then when it hit the poor eggs mind.

"NO not Thirdwheelshipping" He screamed. "NO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Togepi then toddled off as fast as it could through the forest, with horrible images of Tracey and Brock doing things running through his head. Pikachu just watched him leave with a sweatdrop on his head. "Pika?"

Soon enough Togepi was far enough away from the campsite for him to stop running. He began to walk and as he did he began to wonder about a few things.

"Thirdwheelshipping..." the egg thought to himself. "...what is the fanfic writer thinking, she's totally against Brock and Tracey getting together, so why did she have them....do that?...Maybe she's been taken over by an evil alien..." Togepi thought hard then shook his little spiky head. "Nah....she's probably mixed rare candies with Cola again"

Suddenly a naked Jesse and James fell out of the bush, stopping togepi in his tracks, he just raised one eyebrow as he looked at them, they obviously didn't see him at first, Jesse was holding a stake and did I happen to mention that they were naked.

"Oh Buffy the vampire layer..."began James in a rather seductive tone. "...before you stake me I must tell you that I'm passionately in love with you and not one night passes where I dream of..." Suddenly James stopped as the two became aware of Togepi's presence. They slowly looked to their left to see togepi stood their with his tiny arms crossed and a rather pissed off look on his face.

"No no no carry on..." togepi said sarcastically. "...I love nothing more than seeing two people playing buffy the vampire layer in the buff, no really carry on"

Jesse and James just blushed and giggled nervously. togepi just rolled his eyes and sighed.

"What is it with this forest, is it a natural authodisiac or something. Honestly I would kill you, but I couldn't be arsed right now...stupid people"

With that togepi toddled off past the naked Jesse and James and walked further into the forest.

Now togepi was starting to feel more left out than pissed off...

"Everyone has somebody to love..." the egg sighed to himself. "Jesse has James, Ash has Misty and Gary, Mondo has Duplica, Ritchie has Todd the snap guy, Brock has Tracey..." upon hearing himself say that he shuddered. "...and even Pikachu has that bottle of ketchup he keeps humping in Ash's bag...but who do I have...nobody...I'm one lonely little Togepi"

Then he heard it, the most graceful singing he had ever heard, coming from the other side of the bushes, but before he could find out who it was he fell asleep, the song made him sleepy.

The next thing Togepi knew he was waking up to jigglypuff doodling on his face. He jumped up quickly and pulled his bazooka out.

"God dammit prepared to get blown to bits you..." Togepi then stopped when he saw jigglypuff's bright blue eyes staring at him glistening in the moonlight. "....you you wonderful creature you!"

Jigglypuff just looked at Togepi all confused. "Jiggly?"

"Oh Jigglypuff..." began Togepi. "...you must run away with me and together we can thinks of plans for world domination"

Once again Jigglypuff looked at Togepi puzzled then began to wonder off through the forest away from Togepi, with that the egg eagerly followed his new love interest.

"Wait Jigglypuff, we could make such beautiful music together"

A few hours later Togepi returned to the camp site...er...it was morning now so all the twerps were up and ...erm... not doing perverted stuff to each other. Togepi just gave out a long sigh and sat down on a rock, making an extra effort to look depressed.

"Hummmm what's wrong Togepi?" Misty asked her young power mad Pokémon.

"Nothing..." sighed Togepi. "...nothing"

"Awwwww.... I think somebody's in love" announced Tracey. Togepi's mouth just fell wide open as he looked at the pathetic human.

"How in the hell did you know that!" the egg gasped.

"It's a Pokémon watcher thing..." replied Tracey. "...I also know that it's Jigglypuff your in love with"

With that Togepi stood up and quickly whipped out his bazooka, pointing it at Tracey's head. "Oh yeah, well watch this wuss boy" With that Togepi fired, creating a very large hole in Tracey's head. Everyone else watched as Tracey fell to the floor dead, then shrugged it off as Brock went up to togepi.

"I can't believe it the Togesters in love" he laughed as he put his hand on Togepi's tiny shoulder.

Togepi just developed a sweatdrop. "Togester?"

"What you gotta learn about woman Togepi is that they always play hard to get, so you've got to attack them until they give in to you..." Brock then developed one very cheesy smile. "...then after that comes the sex"

"Brock I think Togepi's too young for that" Misty shouted. Togepi just whipped out his bazooka again and pointed it in Misty's direction.

"Shut up Bitch or you'll be next!"

Misty just clenched her teeth with fear then turned towards Ash.

"Er...Ash those bushes are looking interesting aren't they"

"I guess" came Ash's reply, not to sure what Misty was getting at.

"So let's go and INSPECT them"

Ash thought for a while before suddenly catching on. "Oh right your trying to cover up the fact that you want to..."

He was forced to shut up when Misty grabbed his ear and pulled him along the floor into some nearby bushes. Togepi and Brock just watched them leave then Togepi spoke.

"So all I have to do is attack jigglypuff"

"No not literally attack her..." Brock snapped. "...you have to woo her with flowers and chocolates"

"Ewwwwwww...." Moaned Togepi. "...not all the mushy stuff"

Brock suddenly began to get restless as certain sounds, which I will not describe, began coming from the bushes.

"Erm...well yeah all the mushy stuff..." Brock said. "...now if you'll excuse me I have...er...some business to take care of in the bushes"

With that he quickly stood up, ran over to the bushes and jumped behind them. Togepi just lifted one eyebrow as he watched him leave, then Pikachu walked over to Ash's backpack and climbed in, followed by sounds similar to what were coming from the bushes.

"Seriously these freaks need help" sighed Togepi as he jumped up off the rock and toddled off back into the deep dark forest.

Meanwhile not that far away, Jesse and James were returning after a long night of playing certain games in the forest. Since Togepi had caught them playing "Buffy the vampire layer" in the buff, they had decided to play another "game". So now instead of being utterly naked, James was dressed up as Austin Powers and Jesse was felicity Shagwell.

Meowth just sighed as he watched them return, he had woken up to one to many mornings with a similar sight. Well at least dey ain't naked dis time, the cat sighed to himself as he wondered up to them.

"So did ya catch Dr. Evil, Austin" Meowth joked as he walked up to them.

"Er...well...no..." stuttered James, who's austin powers wig was well outta place. "...but I defiantly caught something else..." he then looked at Jesse in a kind of seductive way.

"What? cooties?" laughed meowth, Jesse and James just shot their Pokémon friend an evil glare, but to meowth this situation was way to good not to make fun of.

"So Jimmy..." he began. "...Does felicity shag well"

"Shagwell by name, shag very well by nature" jesse replied.

"Yeah you wish" Joked James, obviously not thinking about what he was saying and the consequences afterwards, Jesse just elbowed him heard in the ribs making James clutch his chest and gasp for air.

"Well I didn't here you complaining when I put your foot in my..."

Meowth broke Jesse off as he put his paws over his ears and screamed.

"NOOOOOOOOOO, I DON'T WANNA HEAR ANY DISTRUBING SEX TALK OKAY DIS FIC IS ONLY SUPPOSED TO BE RATED 12?" he yelled then he ran away from them screaming. Jesse and James just watched him leave then turned to each other.

"Wanna suck on my chocolate salty balls...." James said, with that he whipped out a tray of very nice smelling chocolate salted balls fresh from the oven. Jesse's eyes shot wide open as she took one.

"Ohhh don't mind if I do" she said as she popped one into her mouth. (*U see that was nothing perverted was it lol*)

While this was going on Togepi was passing by and cringed as he heard Jesse and James' stupid rendition of Chef from south parks "chocolate salty balls" song.

"Oh I'm starting to hate this forest" she sighed to himself as he quickly left them.

Soon enough he found Jigglypuff, the love of his life, who was doodling funny pictures on the back of a sleeping hitmonchan's back, pictures that included certain things Jesse and James had gotten up to the previous night...they were life drawings *lol*

"Oh Jigglypuff my love, my dearest..." said Togepi as he approached Jigglypuff. "...once again we are together, now we must flee this place and begin our new life"

"Like Who the hell are you?" asked jigglypuff who sounded almost like one of Misty's annoying sisters. Togepi just sulked.

"You don't remember me" he said.

"Like no!" She thought then realized that she remembered him. "Oh yeah, your that annoying little Togepi that I met earlier today"

"So are we gonna run off together to live eternity together?" Togepi asked. Jigglypuff just cringed.

"Ewwwwww like no!" She then turned towards some bushes, put on a teary sulky face and cried out, "Mother like get rid of this creep will ya!"

Suddenly a very angry Wigglytuff came out of the bush and began to approach togepi. The egg took one look at the pokemon who had blown up like a balloon and backed off nervously.

"I'm sorry Ms Wigglytuff, Ooohh, I am for real, never meant to make your daughter cry, I apologize a trillion times, I'm sorry Ms Wigglytuff, ooooh, I am for real" togepi said nervously (*NOTE: If u didn't get that sentence those are lyrics from a song called "Ms. Jackson" just with Wigglytuff instead of Jackson...well no duh!*)

Just then togepi realized he had his ultimate weapon with him...his bazooka. He whipped it out and fired...but nothing happened.

"Great what a time to go out of ammo" the egg sighed. With that Wigglytuff slapped togepi hard sending him "Blasting off again"

Togepi flew through the air then landed butt first into a field full of very sharp Moon stones. The egg stood up carefully and looked behind him to see a sharp Moon stone sticking out of his butt.

"Great first I get dumped by jigglypuff before I can go out with her, then I get a moon stone stuck up my ass..." moaned togepi. "...what else could go wrong today"

Suddenly dark clouds gather over head, there's lightning, thunder then it pours it down with rain. Togepi just stood there getting soaked not looking pleased at all.

"Note to self...never say "What else can go wrong" in a bad situation your just asking for trouble"

The little egg then began to wonder off back to the twerps campsite.

Upon arrival the three twerps had finished whatever they were doing in the bushes (*wink wink*) and were ready to leave, they all turned to Togepi as he walked up to them and they all began to snigger.

"What's so funny freaks" Togepi snapped at the three humans.

"Erm...Togepi..." began Brock. "...you have a huge moon stone sticking out of your ass"

"Well never..." Togepi snapped sarcastically. "....come on let's leave, I've had enough of this forest, it's the sickest place EVER!"

With that the twerps leaved Viridian forest...and that's about it for them...hey let's go and see what Team Rocket are doing!

In Team Rocket's camp ground Meowth is wondering around with a suspicious look on his face.

"Hummm it's quiet...." he thought to himself. "...a little too quiet"

He then spotted the weapons chest, that they did cart around with them, open. The cat peered in to see a small note addressed to him. it read:

To meowth,
We owe you two cattle prods
love
J & J

Meowth just screamed.

"ARRGGGHHHHH, DEY BROKE INTO DA WEAPONS CHEST AND STOLE DA CATTLE PRODS AGAIN!"

With that he ran off fast into the forest following the sounds of buzzing electricity, giggles and screams.

As this rather sick "Tad" fic ends we will begin to ponder a few things, Will Togepi ever find true love? and where exactly did Jesse put James' foot? Honestly I don't think we really wanna know the answer to THAT question so please, don't ask me for a sequel on that matter. I gotta go now cos I'm convinced that after reading this story...people will hunt me down and kill me, so I'm going undercover for a few weeks, cya!

THE END