Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / Wish Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction / Digimon Fan Fiction / Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction / Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction ❯ Mystery Anime Theatre 3001 ❯ And It Only Gets Worse From Here ( Chapter 1 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

In the somewhat distant future,

We've forgotten in what place.

Blade and several anime guys

Are caught in a nasty chase.

By this creep named Fakenstein.

Just an evil guy with a sadistic mind.

From his space ship below he likes to scream and curse,

As he chases the poor peoples all across the universe!

Fakenstein: I'LL...GET...YOU!!!

"I'll send them different fanfics,

Whatever, I can find. (lalala)

They'll have to sit and read them all

While I monitor each mind." (lalala)

Now keep in mind Blade can't control

Where the fanfics begin or end. (lalala)

He'll try to keep his sanity

With the help of his anime friends.

All: What friends?

<<<Anime Roll Call>>>

Seto! (Blue-Eyes--White Lightning Attack)

Serena! (Moon stop-looking-up-my-skirt power)

Duo! (Call me Shinigami)

Davis! (Don't touch the goggles)

If you're wondering how they eat and breathe,

And other smart-ass facts. (lalala)

Then repeat to yourself it's just a fic

So you should really just relax!

For Mystery Anime Theater 300o...and one!

--------------------

Current Victims: Seto (YGO), Duo (GW), Serena (SM), Davis (D), Ryoko (TM), Kohaku (W), Freeza (DBZ), Inuyasha (INU), and Cloud (FF7).

(On the former "Satellite of Love"...)

Freeza: So I forget...why are we here again?

Ryoko: (Glares at Freeza) Because we've been captured by some freak who's going to torture us you idiot!

Freeza: WHAT!?! (Pouts) Aww man...I always end up dying in these things!

Duo: (Grins) Hey, at least there are a couple of cute girls here! (Turns to Kohaku) Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Duo Maxwell! I may run and hide, but I never tell a lie!

Kohaku: (Smiles, having no idea he's trying to hit on her) Hello, I'm Kohaku!

Inuyasha: WHO CARES!?! We should just kick that creep's ass and force our way outta here!

Cloud: That may not be a good idea...

Inuyasha: Why not?

Cloud: (Points to the window) Because we'd die before we could reach Earth.

Everyone: HUH!?! (Rushes to the window to find that they are in fact, on a space station orbiting earth)

Inuyasha: GODAMMIT!

Kohaku: (Gasps) You must not take the Lord's name in vain like that!

Seto: (Whispering) What's her deal?

Davis: She's an angel.

Seto: Yes, I know she's nice, but what does that have to do with...?

Davis: No, I mean she's an ANGEL. You know. Halo. Wings. That sort of thing.

Duo: (Grinning) Angel, huh?

Serena: (Bashes Duo on the head with her fist) Don't even think about it. She's an ANGEL for pete's sake!

Duo: Kidding! Kidding! Geez...

(The monitor turns on, revealing some old guy who looks just like Dr. Jero.)

Old Guy: Hello my victims!

Duo: You're the one who brought us here?

Old Guy: Yep.

Inuyasha: So just who the hell are you?

Guy: I'm...DR. FAKENSTEIN!!!

Serena: Wait a minute...I remember you! Didn't you get your ass kicked by the crew of Anime Deathmatch?

Fakenstein: Yes, but I'm back and I am currently testing a new method to use to take over the universe! MWAHAHAHAAA!

Ryoko: And that would be...?

Fakenstein: I'm going to hold you all captive here and force you to read BAD FANFICTION!!!

All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

(A beam falls from the ceiling and lands on Freeza, killing him.)

Inuyasha: Lucky bastard.

Fakenstein: Crap...I'll just have to replace him. (Pushes a button on his remote control)

(A portal opens and someone falls through and lands on his feet, cracking the floor somewhat. Standing upright, it's revealed that the person is Blade from ANIME DEATHMATCH!!!)

Blade: What's going on here?

Duo: We've all been kidnapped and are being forced to read bad fanfiction.

Blade: Great, time to put my bashing skills to good use! Bring on the bad fics!

Fakenstein: Hey, I didn't say ALL of it was gonna be bad. It's more fun to watch you all try to keep up hope that you'll be lucky enough to see a good one. HAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!

Everyone (Minus Blade and Kohaku): (Looks at each other nervously)

Kohaku: (Smiles, having no clue what's going on)

Blade: (Sharpening his sword) What was that? I wasn't listening.

Fakenstein: (Sweatdrop) Anyways, todays series of fics are by a particular author who goes by the name Midnight Wolf Angel.

Serena: Wait a minute...that name sounds familiar for some reason...

Fakenstein: You probably knew her as "The real Eternal Sailor Earth".

Davis: The real Eternal Sailor Earth!?! I thought she was gone? Gone and never coming back?

Fakenstein: She's on mediaminer now. Plus, I saved her stories before she left FFnet.

Duo: YOU MONSTER!

Fakenstein: I don't want to wear you all out at once, so I'm only sending in five at a time. Blade, in being one of my enemies, you'll always be included. Plus I wanna see if anything can actually have an effect on you.

Blade: (Shrugs) Works for me.

Fakenstein: Serena, and Seto, you are both directly involved in at least one of these and therefore must view, as well as Duo and Davis because she wrote fics about your shows even if we're not gonna see them today.

Duo: I just hope we all manage to survive this with our sanity...

Fakenstein: Fat chance.

Blade: We've got fanfic sign!

(Cue door sequence. Door 1 is a big screen TV the size of the entire wall. Blade pulls out a remote and turns on the TV, which shows a wall with a door. They walk onto the screen and open the door.)

(Door 2 is a giant fish. It opens its mouth and sucks them in.)

(Door 3 is a grandfather clock. It chimes 12 times and the door opens.)

(Door 4 is a vault door with a combination locker. They all try to figure out the combination until Blade gets annoyed and kicks the door down.)

(Door 5 is is censored. They cuss out the censors as they go through.)

(Door 6 is a normal set of theatre doors. They go through and enter the theatre.)

Davis: Well, considering this is like watching an extremely bad movie only we have to read and there's no sound, who wants popcorn?

Duo: You snuck food in here?

Davis: He never said we couldn't!

Serena: Sure. We'll need something to keep us at least somewhat sane.

Duo: Except for Blade. He likes insanity.

Blade: For your sake, I'll take that as a compliment.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Forgotten Sailor Scouts

Serena: Maybe they were forgotten for a reason?

Seto: There's no disclaimer! She could be sued!

All: (Cross their fingers and pray)

'Class, I have an announcement to make,' said the girl's math prof.,

Duo: (As Math Prof) I have no idea what I'm doing or why I'm even here.

' I would like to introduce some new students.'

Davis: Warning! Warning! Danger Will Robinson!

Serena rolled her eyes

Serena: (As fic Serena) Oh great. I'm trapped in another bad fanfic.

this was the second day in a row that they had some new students. Yesterday the Starlights returned. Then four girls entered the room.

Seto: Oh, that's not suspicious.

'Hi,' I said, smiling,

Davis: Self-insertion...not a good sign...

' I'm Sarah, and these are my sisters Brintty

Duo: Brintty? What type of a name is Brintty?

Seto: Geez, it's her own character and she can't even get the name right!

and Zoy.' Zoycite or Zoy as we liked to call her

Serena: It's Zoisite...and 'she' is actually a guy.

Duo: Wait a minute...didn't you kill him?

Blade: Less than a minute into the story and already things don't make sense.

, the blond, and Brintty, the blue and purple haired one, smiled and waved shyly. 'And I'm Christina,' said the other brown.

Duo: Anyone even want to attempt to correct that?

After school

Seto: Which actually turned out to be five minutes later.

they met up with Darien and the outer sailors at a café.

Davis: Strange...where are the Inners?

'You know,' said Seiya

Serena: She just said that Darien and the outer senshi were there. The Starlights don't count.

Seto: And how the heck does she even know they're there? If it's first person narrative, keep it that way!

rubbing her chin,' That Christina girl seems filmuar.'

Blade: And just how old is this author?

Davis: Apparently, she's fifteen.

Blade: FIFTEEN!?! She's FIFTEEN and she can't even spell words out correctly? Or at least have the common sense to look in a dictionary?

Davis: Fifteen physically. No one knows her mental age.

'Maybe she was one of your old girlfriends,'

Duo: You just said that Seiya is a girl! YOU SICK SICK BASTARD!

Serena: Actually, it's true...

Duo: (Goes white) Oh...

Amara joked. 'AH! HELP!' screamed Molly and Melvin.

Serena: (As Molly and Melvin) We're trapped in a crappy fanfic!

They quickly transformed and ran to help. A monster from the new Negaverse loomed over them mincingly.

Duo: Isn't that something you do to meat?

Sailor Moon

Serena: Since when did I get there?

said her bit so Molly and Melvin could get away.

Serena: Oh sure...she skips my speech but will most likely write out her own. Talk about conceited.

Guys: (Roll eyes)

Seto: Face it, all those speeches are corny!

Serena: I know they're corny! And those short skirts are stupid, but it's not like we have a say in what we can do.

Davis: She's got a point...we're all slaves of animation...except for Blade.

Blade: (Grins as the others glare at him)

Angrily the monster shot her energy stealing vines at Sailor Moon.

Serena: (As fic Serena) YES! FREEDOM FROM THIS NIGHTMARE!!!

The other scouts pushed her out of the way just in time but, were caught instead.

Serena: (As fic Serena) Aw dammit.

Seto: It's surprising that they were all stupid enough to jump in the way. Only one or two of them would have been enough.

Duo: But you've got to wonder how the monster's able to capture all of them.

'Hehehe!' she laughed; 'Now I have almost all the energy I need.'

Serena: Almost? She just sapped the energy of 12 people! Well...13 if you count the pink-haired brat.

Blade: Actually, that would be 12 and a half...the spore doesn't count as a full person.

She let the scouts and Tuxedo Mask fall to the ground as she held up an energy ball. 'No give it back right now!' cried sailor moon.

Duo: Riiight...like she's really gonna listen.

Davis: Hey, in stuff like this, you never know.

As she spoke a single, glowing tear ran down her cheek.

Seto: Which isn't really important because the author's characters should drop by and take all the glory any minute now.

Then all the sailor scouts became Eternal sailor scouts. Each held her own weapon of great power.

Blade: Yet apparently, they STILL aren't strong enough to take down the monster on their own.

Serena: Why bother upgrading them if they're not even going to get to do anything?

Duo: And where're the weapon descriptions?

The monster was about to try to trap Sailor Moon when. 'Hold it right there!' yelled four voices at once.

Davis: And here we go...

Serena: We have identified the targets as Mary Sues. I repeat: the targets are Mary Sues!

Guys: (Shudder)

Sailor Moon looked around and spotted four Eternal sailor scouts standing in the shadows.

Serena: And of course, they're already at their highest level of power that took us several years to reach.

'I'm Sailor Earth!'

Seto: (Rolls eyes) Wow, really? There are only a thousand of those!

Blade: I feel sorry for the Earth...being stuck with HER for a protector...

Serena: When will they learn? There IS no Sailor Earth. Darien's the protector of Earth even though he sucks at it.

I said as stepped out in my maroon and dark aqua green sailor scout outfit.

Davis: And ironically, she looks just like the author (Gasp!) and she acts just like the author (Gasp!) and she has the same name as the author (Gasp!) and maybe she IS the author! WHAT A THOUGHT!!!

'I'm Sailor Star,'

Serena: A Senshi of the Stars? What do you think the Starlights are supposed to be?

Seto: Geez, if you're gonna write a fic, at least know what you're doing!

said a girl wearing a salmon pink and purple outfit.

Davis: The first person to make a remark concerning those colors will be introduced to my fists.

Duo: Whoa! Whoa! Don't tell me you like her!

Davis: No, I just don't want to have to listen to any more gay comments.

'I'm Sailor Lightverce,'

Duo: What the fuck...?

Seto: The author was probably trying to come up with an opposite to the Negaverse.

Duo: But then why the hell is it 'lightverce'? She didn't even spell it right!

said the one in sliver and scarlet. 'I'm Sailor Sun,'

Davis: Sailor Sun? The sun isn't a planet!

Serena: Apparently it doesn't matter. There are still hundreds of them roaming around.

said the one in light aqua green and midnight blue.

Duo: Shouldn't she be wearing yellow or gold or some color expressing HEAT!?! You know, considering the sun is a giant ball of fire?

Blade: Which somehow didn't burn her to a crisp?

Duo: Good point...

'And we're the Forgotten Sailor Scouts!' we cried all at once.

All: And we don't care!

We destroyed the monster but couldn't save the energy.

Blade: Wow! I wouldn't have believed it, but it's true! They're even MORE pathetic than I originally thought!

Sailor Star ran over to Sailor Starfighter and gently lifted her head. Starfighter opened her eyes for a moment

Duo: (As Starfighter) AH! There's some freak touching me!

and smiled up at Star then she fainted. 'We need to take them to safe place to get their strength,' I said as I helped Sailor Moon to her feet,

Serena: (As fic Serena) Don't touch me!

'Do you know of any?' 'Yes,' Sailor Moon replied,' the temple.'

Blade: Where you aren't wanted because you are spawn of evil!

All: BEGONE!

Amy slowly opened her eyes and saw Serena's smiling face.

Seto: Which has what to do with anything?

When every one was awake we introduced ourselves. 'We are all related to other sailors,' I explained,

Serena: (Fake shock) No...really?

' My sisters Brintty,

Duo: Oops, she did it again.

Blade: Now don't you start that!

Zoycite or Zoy for short, and I are Serena's moon kingdom cousins.'

Davis: Then how the hell are they Sailor Earth, Sailor Lightverse, and Sailor Sun if they're from the MOON?

Serena: And wasn't Zoisite supposed to be one of Darien's protectors before he turned evil and tried to kill me?

'What!?!' Serena cried. 'Their mother, Queen Ariel, queen of the Lightverce

Seto: Which is oh so much more important than the Moon Kingdom even though we never heard of it before now.

, was Queen Serenity's sister,' said my cat Moon Tiger.

Duo: And of course they get a talking cat too.

Blade: Actually, it's a Tiger.

Duo: Who cares? It's still stupid!

'Moon Tiger but I thought you died!' cried Luna.

Duo: (As Luna) Dammit. I'll just have to try harder next time.

'Actually he almost died as did Queen Ariel,'

Blade: But they didn't much to the dissapointment of the world.

explained Christina's cat Twinkle.

All: Twinkle, twinkle little star...

'If you want proof we'll give it to you,' said Moon Tiger as his moon mark glowed.

Seto: (Rolls eyes) Oh wow...a cat with a glowing forehead...I sure am convinced...

'I still don't believe you!' cried Serena. I wiseled and my mother appeared and said, 'I see you finally found your cosine.'

Davis: (Announcer voice) And it's time for a hilbilly moment!

'Oh, Aunt Ariel!' cried Serena as she hug Mother.

Serena: (As fic Serena) Even though I don't know who you are and I've never actually met you, I'm going to automatically believe what these girls are saying for no good reason other than to fill the author's desire to make herself the star!

After many hugs we got down to work. We all had the felling that we had a long fight ahead of us.

Seto: And if we're lucky, we won't have to read it.

The End

All: THANK GOD!

For now

Seto: Crap.

Davis: You mean there's more?

Blade: A LOT more, I'm afraid...

Duo: And think man...this is only the beginning for you!

Blade: Shut up braid-boy.

--------------------

Love Revived

Seto: It should have stayed dead.

Blade: Hey, I tried, but no matter what I do, it WON'T DIE!

I looked out over Tokyo and sighed. I had the dream again,

Serena: The one where you're being flamed repeatedly for crappy fics? That's no dream.

the dream about the last night of the Moon Kingdom. I was wearing a lovely maroon dress with a dark aqua green sash.

Duo: (Shudders) There is no such thing as a lovely maroon dress.

Davis: Why?

Duo: (Shows a picture of Relena wearing her school uniform)

Everyone: (Shudders)

I was dancing to a sweet flute melody with a prince, we were about to kiss when the Moon Kingdom was destroyed and I woke up.

All: YAY!

Duo: We lucked out that time.

"But who was the prince from my dream?" I wondered. The only thing I could remember was that he had long red hair.

Seto: Gee...that really narrows it down...

I was to busy

Blade: Attempting to learn how to use proper spelling and grammar?

thinking

Davis: She can do that?

that I didn't see a hand reach out from the shadows and

Duo: Stab her repeatedly? Choke her? Bash her head with a comically large mallet?

cover my nose and mouth.

Seto: Past tense or present tense? MAKE UP YOUR MIND!

I fainted

Blade: Naturally, as most Mary Sues do.

as I was dragged away into the Negaverse.

Davis: But how would she know she was being dragged to the Negaverse? And why is it even still around?

Serena: Random, useless excuse for the Mary Sue to be rescued by some anime guy who turns out to be her one true love.

Davis: Typical.

When I awoke I found myself in the dress from my dream.

Duo: But how did he get it on her?

All: BAD MENTAL IMAGE! BAD MENTAL IMAGE!!!

"Well, my dear, I see you have awakened," said a voice. I looked around and spotted a boy with dark hair and eyes and an upside down, black crescent moon on his forehead.

Serena: Which is a sign of the DARK MOON, not the NEGAVERSE! Get your facts straight!

"I am Prince Josh,"

Davis: (As Josh) And I want revenge because the damned author gave me this crappy name and a lousy unimaginative description.

he said as he came closer preparing to kiss me.

Seto: Though why he would is beyond me.

Duo: The guy sure doesn't waste time, does he?

I felt his hot breath on my face then."YYYYIIIIIII!" he screamed in agony as a pink rose cut his arm. We both looked up, in the window stood

Davis: Pee Wee Herman.

Duo: Barney.

Blade: That stupid Zero guy from SDG.

some one dressed like Tuxedo Mask, except it wasn't Dairen; this man had a black mask and bowtie, and long red hair.

Serena: Oh come on! Who would be idiotic enough to dress like that?

Guys: (Stare)

Serena: I mean besides Darien. We all know he's an idiot.

Duo: Then why do you end up with him?

Serena: Hello? Not like I had a choice here!

'Like the prince from my dream!' I thought. "Who are you?" asked Prince Josh. "I am Midnight Mask, and I'm here to

Seto: (As Midnight Mask) Get my money back for this lousy costume.

rescue Sailor Earth," he replied. 'No one but the cats, the other scouts and the Lightverce

Duo: (As Sailor Earth) Which I have no idea what it is, I just wanted a cool name for something to be a princess of.

know I'm Sailor Earth, so how does he know?' I wondered.

Blade: Actually, everyone knows. You blew your secret on the internet.

The next instant I was back home.

Duo: Wow, that was quick.

Blade: What? No fight scene?

When I entered my room I found on my bed two items: a pink rose and a locket that played the song from my dream.

Serena: (Fake surprise) Wow, they seem almost exactly like the ones I have only better because this is the author we're talking about and everything has to be perfect for her!

I found a note on the rose that said; Sailor Earth,

Davis: (As Note) I hate you. Never write anything about me again. I would never go out with you. Get over yourself. This message will self-destruct in five seconds and I hope it blows you to hell. Sincerely NOT yours, Midnight Mask.

If you wish to see my true face, meet me at the dock at 4:00pm and please come alone. Singed,

All: La la la...

Midnight Mask "I'll meet you guys at the café later!"

Seto: You mean the others were there all along?

Duo: And they didn't even try to help her?

Serena: Shows how much they like her.

I called as I swung my leg over my motorbike/ minicon, Turn Pike.

Duo: (As Turn Pike) Augh! Too...heavy...(Falls over)

Blade: At least now we know what happened to the one minicon who went "missing".

"Wait, where are you going?" Christina asked, but it was too late I was zooming away. "Hello? Midnight Mask are you here?" I called out at the dock.

Blade: And then a crazy ax-weilding murderer jumps out, chops her to bits, then pisses on her remains, which are then devoured by ravenous dogs.

Serena: Then the scouts blast her sorry friends to hell. They have a big party to celebrate which lasts for several days. And everyone lived happily ever after. The End.

Dr. Fakenstein: (OS) Nice try, but it doesn't work that way.

"You have held up your end of the barging

Davis: Barging? She tends to do that quite often.

now I will hold up mine," said Midnight Mask as he appeared out of the fog.

Seto: A fog? She's making it sound like it's dark there!

Duo: Isn't it?

Seto: She just said this happened at four in the afternoon! The sun would still be shining brightly!

Serena: And you're surprised? Remember who we're dealing with here!

Davis: I'd think of it more as a 'what' than a 'who'...

Slowly he pulled off his mask then I recognised him. "You're the prince from my dream!" I cried. He nodded and said, "My name is Kumara."

Serena: Funny how she never mentions just what he's the prince of...

I ran to embrace him. He held me close and then. we kissed.

Seto: Gee, it didn't take all that long for them to get together.

Duo: Maybe it's because she put him under a spell?

The End

All: YAY!

For Now

All: DAMMIT!

--------------------

The Millennium Crystal

Blade: Which will, of course, be more powerful than all the other Millenium Items combined.

{Sailor Moon, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Yu-Gi-Oh crossover}[No Starlights except Christina]

Serena: Who's technically not even a real Starlight.

It was a few days before my birthday and my friends and family

Duo: Were regretting the day she had ever been born.

had planed a surprise party for me.

Seto: And how do you know about it if it's supposed to be a surprise?

Kurama was out shopping for a present, he knew that no ordinary present would do.

Davis: But of course nothing ordinary is good enough for a Mary Sue. He'll have to lose his house, work five jobs, and sell all his prized possessions, but it'll be worth it to make her happy for the five minutes before she wants something else.

Then as he passed by a small jewelry shop he spotted a crystal necklace. He dashed in and examined it closely. He noticed that on the part were the crystal was attached there was an eye of Horus. He knew then that he had found the perfect gift. He grabbed it and walked up to the counter where an old woman was working. "Excuse me, ma'am, how much is this?" he asked. "5000 yen," she replied.

Duo: (As Kurama) Forget this! I could get a dozen hookers for the same price!

Seto: HEY!

Serena: Watch your mouth! We've got a kid here!

Davis: Oh come on! I'm not that young, and I've said worse!

"Sold!" he said as he slammed the money on to the counter. *On my Birthday* "Keiko, I just can't believe that everyone forgot,"

Blade: I can.

I said as I walked in. "Surprise! Happy Birthday, Sarah!" cried my friends as they popped out from their hiding places. "Oh, Kurama, you didn't forget!" I said happily as I cuddled my boyfriend.

Seto: I think I'm going to be sick.

"Not in 100000 years,"

Serena: Please, the whole Moon Kingdom bit only occured 1000 years ago!

he replied. When it was time to open presents, I opened Kurama's last. "Oh, Kurama, it's lovely!" I said as I placed it around my neck. Then in a flash of light a girl about my age appeared from the crystal. "Who are you?" I asked. "I'm Angel the sprit of the Millennium Crystal,"

Duo: And of course it's an angel.

Seto: Wait a minute...that's not how it works! I would know!

she answered then went back inside.

Davis: Not much of a talker, huh?

"Wow, that crystal was worth the money,"

Seto: No it wasn't.

said Kurama before I tackled him with kisses.

Blade: (As Kurama) AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF ME!!!

--------------------

Our boy friends are drunk

YYH, YGO, and SM crossover

I sat in my room reading a comic; I was the only one in the house. Brintty was on her honeymoon with Yami,

Duo: Whoa, whoa...when did this happen?

Sailon was moving in with her fiancé, Seto,

Seto: WHAT THE--!?! I WOULD NEVER DO THAT!

Serena: I'm just glad I'm not even in this anymore.

Zoycite, or Zoy for short, was babysitting all week and Mom was out if town.

Duo: (Singing) Sarah's mom has got it going on...

Seto: Shut up.

Duo: (Still singing) Sarah's mom has got it going on...

Seto: I said shut up!

Duo: Man, I can't believe you have no taste in music.

Seto: And I can't believe you won't SHUT UP!

The window was open so the cool night air could flow in. Suddenly, some one started to play Wipe Out, very loudly. When I looked outside I spotted Yusuke, Hiei, and Kuwabara doing a drunken version of The Swim, and, to my great surprise, Kurama was on top of my mom's car pretending to surf.

Duo: Here's a brick. Please slam it onto my head and knock me out.

Blade: Normally, I'd love to, but you'll just have to endure with the rest of us.

Duo: Dammit.

'Oh boy, they most of gotten drunk,' I thought. I quickly picked up my phone and called Keiko, Raye, and Michelle.

Duo: Even though they don't know her and would have nothing to do with a Mary Sue.

"Raye, Michelle, Keiko, Hiei, Kuwabara, Yusuke, and Kurama are drunk.

Serena: What? They're all drunk?

Seto: Someone needs to learn proper grammar...

And they're in front of my house," I said. "Oh man, when Hiei gets over his hang over he'll be sick for days!" cried Raye. "I know so will Kurama. I better go bye," I said as I hung up. *the next day* "Bbbbbbaaaaaarrrrrrfffffff!!!!!!!!!!!!" was the noise that told me that Kurama had puked again.

Davis: You would think they could hold their liquor better than that...

Seto: They can. It's just the author trying to make them look stupid to make herself look better.

Serena: I'm sensing some serious issues here...

As I dampened a washcloth to clean him up the phone rang. "Hello?" I asked as I started to clean Kurama up. "Hey, Sarah, it's me, Raye," she replied. "Hey, how's Hiei?" I said. "Not so good." "Same here gotta go bye," I said as I hung up.

Davis: And I'm disgusted.

Blade: That chapter doesn't even deserve commenting.

The Big Date

*One week after our boyfriends are drunk*

Duo: Which apparently, wasn't even written for any good reason than to increase the author's already way-too-big ego.

The full moon shone down

Serena: And of course it just happens to be the full moon for the romantic crap.

as Kurama and I walked thought the park.

Davis: The park thinks?

Seto: Why does everything happen at the park?

I sat down on a bench. "Hey, Sarah, I have a question," said Kurama as he looked for something in his pocket, blushing. "Yes, what is it?" I asked.

Blade: (As Kurama) Will you go to hell and leave me alone?

"Will you marry me?" he asked as he opened a small box that contained a ruby engagement ring. As my eyes grew wide I said, "Of course, I will." Then

Duo: She blew up.

Seto: Not likely...

Blade: Hey, a guy can dream...a guy can dream...

we kissed under the full moon.

--------------------

Sprit Detective Codename Angel

Seto: Gee, I wonder what THIS one's about...

All: (Pretend to be thinking hard) Hmmm...

"Now, I bet you want to know why I called you here," said Botan as she looked at Yusuke, Kurama, Hiei, and Kuwabara.

All: Not really.

"Duh," replied Yusuke. "Ok, you can come in now," called Botan. When I entered Kurama's mouth fell open. "Sarah! Why are you here?" he asked. "I'm part Mimic demon and I'm a sprit detective,"

Duo: Whoa...big shock there. She's Sailor Earth, related to Serena, has a Millenium Crystal and a minicon, is part Mimic demon, AND she's a spirit detective? What next? She's supposed to be future Queen of the world?

Serena: (Thwaps Duo) Don't give her any ideas!

I replied. Botan told us that our newest case would be extremely difficult;

Blade: Who's willing to bet that despite how difficult it's supposed to be, they're gonna get it done in less than five minutes? Anyone?

Davis: I've learned never to bet on a sure thing.

it seemed that some sort if demon was kidnapping pregnant women, but only certain ones. "Ok, so what do we do now?" asked Kuwabara as he rolled his eyes. I pulled out a maroon mini computer that had a dark aqua green Sailor Earth symbol.

Serena: The only scout who's even allowed one of those is Amy, and she reported hers was stolen...

All: A-HAH!

"Where did you get that?" asked Yusuke.

Duo: (As Sarah) Uh...internet?

"From Moon Tiger," I replied,

All: Suuuuure...

"Got it!" "What?" asked the boys. "It turns out that all the women he's kidnapped were kidnapped about 9 months earlier," I explained.

Seto: Hmmm...funny, but this sounds strangely like a movie I saw once...

"Oh man, Sarah, why do I have to be the bait?" asked Kurama as we finished his disuse.

Serena: I thought all the ones who are being kidnapped were kidnapped before? So why would they try to kidnap Kurama?

"Because I'm the only one who can use the Mini computer and you're the only the other member of our group that looks like a girl," I answered.

Davis: That's just wrong.

Duo: DUMP HER MAN! DUMP HER AND RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!

Soon the demon took the bait and we caught him.

Blade: (Rolls eyes) Wow...big shock there.

"Well, Sarah, I guess you do have what it takes to be a sprit detective," said Kurama.

All: NO SHE DOESN'T!

"Thanks, but when we're on a case call me Angel," I replied.

Blade: I've seen angels, and trust me girly...you ain't an angel!

"Oops," he said. "Hiei!" cried Raye. "Kazuma!" cried Michelle.

Serena: Oh boy...Haruka's not gonna be happy about this...

Davis: Wait a minute! What happened to Ukina?

"Yusuke!" cried Keiko. "Kurama!" I cried. Then we pounced on them and smothered them with kisses.

The Guys: (As the Guys) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! THEY'RE TRYING TO KILL US!

Duo: Why do all her fics have to involve her making out with Kurama? Is she obsessed or something?

"Wow," they said when we stopped then we went out for milkshakes. "So, you two are engaged now," said Raye looking at Kurama and me. I blushed and nodded. "Cool! Can I be a bride's maid?" cried Raye.

Serena: One, Raye would not cry. Two, she would not ask to be a bride's maid. That's more of a Mina thing. Three, she wouldn't want anything to do with you!

The rest of us sweatdroped then laughed.

Blade: They laughed so much, their fucking heads exploded and they all died. Then the world celebrated their deaths for a whole year before I came and blew it up. The end.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(They leave the theatre and reach the main room where Dr. Fakenstein appears on the screen.)

Fakenstein: So, what did you think?

Serena: I've seen some horrible things, but that...(Shudders)

Fakenstein: What about you goggle-kid?

Davis: (Shrugs, as if it's no big deal) Eh...I've been in worse.

Fakenstein: Hmmm...you won't be so confident for long. What about the braided baka?

Duo: MY EYES!!! THEY BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURN!!!

Fakenstein: Huh...never had that happen...and how did it affect the mind of Seto Kaiba?

Kaiba: You'll be hearing from my lawyer.

Fakenstein: Blade?

Blade: I'm sending the virus as we speak.

Dr. Fakenstein: Now...the ratings? Remember, Chibi's are good and Andy's are bad. 10 out of 10 is the best...or worst in the Andy's case.

Serena: I'm giving her 10 out of 10 Andy's. Those fics are in the Sailor Moon section but have virtually nothing do do with the show other than herself being Sailor Earth. Sure, Mars and Neptune are there, but just barely and they were completely out of character, while the rest of us seemed to just have mysteriously dropped off the face of the planet.

Seto: 9 out of 10 Andy's. The spelling and grammar was just sad considering the author is supposedly 15. And the characters were poorly portrayed, at least those that were even involved at all. She apparently doesn't know anything about any of the shows other than the names of the characters, special items, powers, creatures, etc. which she only pulls in to make herself more important.

Duo: 8 out of 10 Andy's. Dude...some of that stuff was just nasty. Thank Shinigami she didn't put in any lemons.

Davis: Right, just for what I've seen so far, I would be nice and give her a 5 out of 10 Andy's. However, she wrote a Digimon fic, so I'm uping it to 8 out of 10 Andy's. The only reason I don't go higher is because she didn't bash me, though I was horribly portrayed. Horribly, horribly portrayed.

Duo: And we're not going to see that fic?

Davis: I hope not...(Shudders)

Blade: 10 out of 10 Andy's. The stories had no plot. There wasn't any point in them other than her making out with Kurama, or being super powerful. She has made no attempt to maintain continuity with the series. Spelling sucked. Grammar sucked. The whole thing sucked. She has no taste whatsoever. These aren't stories, they're EGO TRIPS!

Dr. Fakenstein: Then if we tally them up...she has a total overall rating of...9 Andy's. (Claps hands) Wonderful! I'll have to be sure to use her stories in the future.

All (minus Blade): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Dr. Fakenstein: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA--

(At this moment, he is cut off when Blade changes the channel.)

Blade: Hmm...wonder what else is on.

********************

Disclaimer 1: "The Forgotten Sailor Scouts", "Love Revived", "The Millennium Crystal", "Our boy friends are drunk", and "Sprit Detective Codename Angel" all belong to Midnight Wolf Angel, thank god, because we wouldn't want the horrid things.

Disclaimer 2: We do not own Seto, Davis, Serena, Duo, Kohaku, Inuyasha, Ryoko, Freeza, or Cloud. Blade, however, is ours. Use him without permission and prepare to suffer the consequences.

Review please. Or you can flame. It's up to you.