Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Oil Change ❯ Oil Change ( Chapter 1 )

Ok Just for a bit of fun I'm putting up a one shot. It was inspired by a chain letter that was sent to me so i don't own parts of it. I thought it would be really funny, so here it is

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Oil Change

Lets see how Bulma does it:

1) She pulls up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles since the last oil change.
2) Drinks a cup of coffee.
3) 15 minutes later, writes a check and leaves with a properly maintained car.

Money spent:
Oil Change $20.00
Coffee $1.00
Total $21.00.

Well, that seems easy enough. Lets take a look at Vegeta shall we:

1) Goes to auto parts store and writes a check for $50.00 for oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.

2) Discovers that the used oil container is full. Instead of taking it back to O'Reilly to recycle, he dumps it in hole in back yard.

3) Opens a can of beer and drinks it.

4) Jacks the car up.. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.

5) Find jack stands under the jeep.

6) In frustration, opens another can of beer and drinks it.

7) Places drain pan under engine.

8) Looks for 9/16 box end wrench.

9) Gives up and uses a crescent wrench.

10) Unscrews drain plug.

11) Drops drain plug in pan of hot oil: gets hot oil on himself in the process.

12) Cleans up mess.

13) Has another beer while watching oil drain.

14) Looks for oil filter wrench.
15) Gives up; pokes oil filter with screwdriver and twists off.
16) Beer.
17) Goku shows up; finishes case of beer with him and has a sparring session. Decides to finish oil change tomorrow.
18) Next day, drags pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19) Throws kitty litter on oil spilled during step18.
20) Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
21) Walks to 7-11; buys beer.
22) Installs new oil filter making sure to apply a thin coat of oil to gasket surface.
23) Dumps first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24) Remembers drain plug from step 11.
25) Hurrys to find drain plug in drain pan.
26) Discovers that the used oil is buried in a hole in the backyard along with drain plug.
27) Drinks beer.
28) Uncovers hole and sifts for drain plug.
29) Discovers that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.
30) Drinks beer.
31) Slips with wrench tightening drain plug and bangs knuckles on frame.
32) Bangs head on floor boards in reaction to step 31.
33) Begins cussing fit.
34) Throws wrench.
35) Cusses for additional 10 minutes because wrench hits his favorite picture of Bulma.
36) Beer.
37) Cleans up hands and forehead and bandages as required to stop blood flow.
38) Beer.
39) Beer.
40) Dumps in five fresh quarts of oil.

41) Beer.
42) Lowers car from jack stands.
43) Accidentally crushes one of the jack stands.
44) Moves car back to apply more kitty litter to fresh oil spilled during step 23...
45) Beer.
46) Test drives car.
47) Get pulled over: arrested for opperating machinery under the influence.
48) Car gets impounded.

49) Make bail.

50) Get car from impound yard.

Money spent:
Parts- $50.00
DUI- $2500.00
Impound fee- $75.00
Bail- $1500.00
Beer- $25.00
Total-- $4150.00

But at least he knows the job was done right.

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Hope you all enjoyed!

-Luna