Fan Fiction ❯ Hidden Emotions ❯ Dad ( Chapter 5 )

I hate you

You've stripped me of my emotions

And then made me feel like a fool because of it

I do not know love or happiness anymore

Only hatred and anger

I don't trust anyone anymore

For fear of getting my heart broken

I've lost all self confidence and pride

Now I feel like a lost puppy dog or a kitten

Alone

Helpless

Defenseless

All my shields have been ripped away

And now I feel naked and ashamed

I've been made to look like a worthless nothing all my life

Now I'm older

Wiser

And angrier than ever

I have a voice

And I'm going to be heard

Not to have my voice to fall upon deaf ears

I'm gonna live my life

Without anyone else telling me what I can or cannot do

My life is full of possibilities

I'm not gonna let you take them away from me

Not like you did when I was little

It's only because of God's and Mom's love for me I am alive

No thanks to you

You stupid son of a bitch

I'm gonna find some way to love and be happy again

No matter what the hell you try to pull

I've been fighting you since I was five

The same age I realized you weren't my dad

You never were

You never are

You never will be

Your only reason to live is to destroy me

Tear me to shreds

Make me feel miserable

Well it worked

Until now

You forced me to be an adult when I was six

I've had to struggle for survival ever since

Who knows what you would do to me if I was in your clutches

I'm never gonna let that happen

I'm never gonna be your victim

I refuse to be

I'm gonna be rid of you someday

And I can't wait till that day comes

But until then

You can take your "I love you" s and "I'm sorry" s

And shove them up your mother fucking ass

Because I don't wanna hear it

Because it's not true

And it never will be