Fan Fiction ❯ The Troublesome Quest For Sanity ❯ to be or not to be ... sane ( Chapter 31 )

Disclaimer: Long story short; I don't own Zelda or any related characters

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[Castle of MY, La Lounge]

Ganondorf: [dials a number]

Answering Machine: Howdy! This is the automatic answering machine of Dr. Frank, the sun-moon-knightly Primagen of Mono Chronos, also known as the Psychiatrist of Time [DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN DUN]. Dr. Frank, the sun-moon-knightly Primagen of Mono Chronos, also known as the Psychiatrist of Time [DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN DUN] will never be at home again. Simply because he has moved. So leave your message after the COCKADOODLEDOOOOOOOO!!! or visit him at his new place at the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine.

Cucco: COCKADOODLEDOOOOOOOO!!!!

Ganondorf: [hangs up] Oh great. QUEEEEEEEEEEEEEENIE!!!!

GuseBat: [appears] Queenie is currently out of order. Please talk to her loyal substitute [points at herself] after the beep.

Ganondorf: GuseBat, do you-

GuseBat: I DIDN'T SAY BEEP YET YOU IMBECILE!!!!

Ganondorf: o_o

GuseBat: Beep. Now what is it?

Ganondorf: o_o***

GuseBat: WHAT????

Ganondorf: Erm . . . . do you know where the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine is and how to get there?

GuseBat: The Lake of Happiness and Sunshine?? OH MY GOD!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!! THE HORROR!!!! THE TERROR!!!! THE ERROR!!! [hides under a carpet]

Ganondorf: o_O

Ravi: [still reading the newspaper] What's wrong with the Lake of Happiness and Su-

GuseBat: [from under the carpet] NO!!! NOT THE NAME!!! DON'T SAY THE NAME!!! IT'S CURSED!!! CURSED!!! EVERYTHING IS CURSED!!! AH!!!

Ravi: Jeez, stupid authors.

GuseBat: [leaving her hideout] FINE! If you don't believe me, then go. Go to the Lake of Happiness and *shudder* Sunshine. AND THEN WE'LL SEE WHO'S THE STUPID ONE OF US!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! [trips over the carpet and falls out of the window] Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhh!!!

Ganondorf+Ravi: -_-****

. . . . . . . . . .

Ganondorf: Okay, let's go!!

Ravi: Ahem . . . . . ahem . . . . . LOCATION PLAN!!

Ganondorf: . . . . . oh.

Puni: [appears] Tadaaaa!

Ganondorf: I *hate* author-y castles.

Ravi: Well, it was your idea to chase Queenie all they way back here.

Ganondorf: BUT SHE . . . . SHE . . . . . she . . . . what did she do again?

Ravi: -_-* She didn't tell you about the emergency whistle.

Ganondorf: Right. SHE DIDN'T TELL ME ABOUT THE EMERGENCY WHISTLE!!!

Puni: COUGH! COUGH!

Ravi+Ganondorf: Yeeeeees?

Puni: Shut up and I'll tell you how to get to the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine. [CRASH!!! VROOOOM!!! ZOINK!!!]

Ganondorf: O_O Did you hear that?

Ravi: Hear what again?

Ganondorf: . . . . . . Lake of Happiness and Sunshine [CRASH!!! VROOOOM!!! ZOINK!!!]

Puni: What do you mean?

Ganondorf: It's the same as in . . . . . Psychiatrist of Time [DUN DUN DUUUUUUN DUN!]

Ravi: Oh, you mean-

Ganondorf: The sound!! The evil sound!! WHERE DOES IT COME FROM????!!

Voice: Hello?

Puni: Who's there?

Voice: Erm . . . . I'm . . . . uhm . . . . the . . . . sound effects dude! DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUN DUN!!!

All: GASP!!!!

Ganondorf: You . . . . are . . . . .

Ravi: But you're supposed to be mysterious and unseen!!

SED: Yes. That's true. I think, I mean . . . . but I wanted to get some credits too!! So I thought . . . . let's say hi to everybody.

Ganondorf: Erm, hi then . . . . uh . . . . sound effects dude.

SED: Just call me Nathanael.

Ganondorf: Nathanael??

Nathanael: It's Greek and means; God has given.

Puni: . . . . God has given me no attention even though I've been standing here for ages. SO WILL YOU EVENTUALLY LISTEN TO ME??

Ganondorf: Uh, right. Sorry Puni. And Nathanael, you . . .

Nathanael: Never mind. I'll . . . . just go back into my dark and lonely corner . . . . to say things like DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN DUN! whenever it's required . . . . . so . . . . no problem . . . . really . . . . . . I . . . . . WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! [runs away]

Ravi: Great. Now this guy has ruined the whole angsty-sound-mysteriousness for me. Bah!

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[a few explanations and several lousy puns later, somewhere in Hyrule]

Ganondorf: And you are sure that this is the right way to the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine? [CRASH!!! VROOOOM!!! ZOINK!!!]

Puni: Yep, definitely.

Narrator: And as Ganondorf kept looking at the dark and lonely wasteland around them he said

Ganondorf: I mean, it just doesn't look like a place filled with happiness and sunshine.

Puni: Because it's doomed, foolish mortal. DOOMED!!!!

Ganondorf: But why is it called the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine then?

Puni: As the King of Red Lions would say; You are surprisingly dull-witted.

Ganondorf: Who?

Ravi: What?

Puni: -_-*** Forget it.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

Puni: It's called the Lake of Happiness and Sunshine to attract stupid people like you. AND THEN YOU WILL BE DOOMED!!! DOOMED!!!

Ganondorf: Oh, okay.

Puni: Besides, the name Lake of Eternal Darkness and Doom was already taken.

Ganondorf+Ravi: o_o***

Narrator: After a long walk and longer silence Ravi finally asked

Ravi: Say, where's Link?

Ganondorf: Who?

Puni: What?

Ravi: -_-***

Ganondorf: Oh, Link. Right. Uhm . . . . I think I forgot him at home.

Ravi: AGAIN????

Ganondorf: Yeah, well, erm . . . .

Ravi: *sigh* Just play the stupid song.

Ganondorf: [whistles "Hit me baby one more time"]

Ravi: The OTHER stupid song!!

Ganondorf: Oh. [whistles the Lost Link Song]

Link: [appears- naked] I'm siiiinging in my shower, just siiiiiinging in my sh- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!

Ganondorf: Mortal enemy - naked - singing a song - BAD MENTAL IMAGE!! [covers his eyes]

Puni: Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaat!!! *drool*

Link: [running around in circles] Help! Help! Help! Help! Help!

Ganondorf: I don't want to know what he's doing right now . . . .

Puni: He's running around in circles - naked of course - shouting for help.

Ganondorf: I said I DON'T want to know!!

Puni: You're welcome! ^_^

Ganondorf: -_-***

Ravi: Can't you put some clothes on???

Link: Some coffin what?

All: -________-************************

Ravi: Puni?

Puni: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwww!!!!

Ravi: -_-

Puni: OKAY, OKAY! [she dresses Link with her awesome author powers]

Ganondorf: Is . . . . is it over?

Ravi: Uh huh.

Puni: All the beautiful nudity! Gone! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [disappears]

Ganondorf+Ravi: Authors. -_-*

Link: Who?

Ganondorf+Ravi: -_-***

Ganondorf: But how are we supposed to find Dr. Frank without her?

Ravi: Uhm . . . . . there!! [points at Link]

Ganondorf: Link?

Ravi: BEHIND Link!

[Link steps aside to reveal a sign saying: Lake of Happiness and Sunshine- This Way!]

All: Ooooooooooh! Aaaaaaaaaah! Uuuuuuuuuuh!

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[after a long and pointless walk Ganondorf, Ravi and Link find themselves standing in front of a bridge]

MysteriousCloakedFigure: Halt!! You may not pass this bridge!!

Ganondorf: *shrug* Okay then. Let's go guys, there has to be another way.

MCF: So it really is your biggest desire to pass?

Ganondorf: No, I just said that-

MCF: I see. You are a brave lad. And therefore I shall give you a chance to pass this bridge!

Ganondorf: Erm, thanks. But-

MCF: I will ask you questions three!

Ravi: Questions three?

Link: Uuuuuuh, question tree!!

All: -_-***

MCF: In order to pass you will have to answer them correctly.

Ganondorf: Er, kay.

MCF: But if you don't . . . . THEN YOU WILL BE DOOMED!!!

Ganondorf: But actually I-

MCF: Very well, your first question!

Ganondorf: o_o*

MCF: When a girl says "I don't care" to you, what does it usually mean?

Ganondorf: Er . . . . WHAT???

MCF: I said; When a girl says "I don't care" to you, what does it usually mean?

Ganondorf: What kind of question is that???

MCF: It tests your knowledge of things that every girl hopes guys know!

Ganondorf: O_O***

MCF: So what does it mean????

Ganondorf: Erm, okay . . . . I think it means that she is either mad at me or she really doesn't care because she'll be happy spending time with me no matter what we wind up doing.

MCF: Not bad, really not bad. Next question! If you are in a restaurant, with a woman, on a date, and you run into a friend of yours and don't introduce her...what does that translate to her?

Ganondorf: Jeez, how rude. It'd mean that I don't have any manners and that I'm obviously not too interested in her.

MCF: Splendid! The last, most difficult and absolutely DOOMED question!! Opening doors - a must?

Ganondorf: Uh . . . . . erm . . . . . yes.

MCF: Yes?

Ganondorf: But just for my girl. Opening doors for other ladies makes it seem less special to the one I'm dating.

MCF: Excellent!!! Awesome!!! I am truly amazed!! You may pass!!

Ganondorf: YAY!

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[seconds later, on the other side of the bridge]

Ravi: How did you . . . .

Ganondorf: Remember that I had to spend my whole life surrounded by females only?

Ravi: Oh. Right.

Dr. Frank: GALABAZOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Ravi: AH!

Ganondorf: AH!

Link: AH! COFFIN!!!

Dr.Frank: Well, well, looky who's visiting us!

Cucco: Bwaaaaaaak!!

Dr.Frank: That's right, that's right. It's Mr. Ganondorf and his deranged green friend!

Cucco: Bwaaaaak!

Dr.Frank: Sure, how impolite. I should ask them in. Very well my dearest friends, come in!

Ganondorf: . . . . . in?

Dr.Frank: HA!! I forgot . . . . silly me. My house is behind that hill!! So follow me . . . . and THEN come in!!

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[later, at Dr. Frank's house]

Link: Uuuuuuuuuuuh, neaty!

Ganondorf: Sure is better than the old windmill.

Dr.Frank: So, what brings you here?

Ganondorf: The therapy of course!

Dr.Frank: Oh, right. Have you already found two more?

Ganondorf: Two more?

Dr.Frank: Yeah, Link and 10 insane people in the waiting room. But I said 13! So where are the others?

Ganondorf: You gotta be wrong. There are already 12 people in the Sacred Waiting Room!

Dr.Frank: Well, there are Ruto, Saria, Darunia, Malon, Talon, Nabooru, Impa, Rauru, Dark Link and Twinrova.

Ganondorf: And Lady Storm and Lord Laceration!!

Dr.Frank: They don't count as insane people.

Ganondorf: Do you want to tell me that they are normal??

Dr.Frank: No, but they are author-y, which means that they can't participate in a therapy for non-author-y people.

Ganondorf: But . . . . .

Dr.Frank: Sorry Ganondorf, you have to find two more.

Ganondorf: But I . . . . .

Queenie: [appears] GALABAZOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Ganondorf: WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS KEEP GETTING WORSE????!!!!

Queenie: Well, thanks. I was missing you too. Hmpf!!

Ganondorf: Get over yourself - I need two other lunatics!!!

Queenie: What about her? [points at Ravi]

Ravi: Who? WHAT??? Are you crazy???

Ganondorf: No, but hopefully you are.

Ravi: o_o**

Ganondorf: Ravi . . . . . . please!

Ravi: Please? Aaaaawww! You haven't said please for ages!! Well then . . . . . . no. HA!!!

Ganondorf: IT'S NOT LIKE YOU HAVE A CHOICE!!! [pulls out a bottle and catches Ravi with it] HA FOR ME!

Ravi: Grrrrr!!!! Let me out!!! Hey!!!! You ungrateful, wingless bastard!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!

Ganondorf: [gives Dr. Frank the bottle] Only one more to go! Uhm . . . .

- silence -

Ganondorf: I just can't think of another insane person in Hyrule.

. . . . . . .

Ganondorf: HEY! Why . . . . why's everyone staring at me????

Queenie: Uhm . . . . . well . . . .

Link: . . . . . . .

Dr.Frank: I just . . . . . erm . . . . .

Ganondorf: You don't . . . . . you didn't . . . . . . Oooooh no!!! NO! I'm sane!!! I'm perfectly sane!!! I mean, I'm not . . . . .

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ FLASBACKS ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Ganondorf: [puts on a pink dress and a blond wig] Uh, I'm a gay hero and I must save the world! Dadee dadum, yadda yadda . . .

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Ganondorf: [he starts strangling himself] Aaargs, die Ganon, die!!!! You won't defeat me!! Yes I will!! No you won't!! Yes I will!! No you won't!! Yes I . . .

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Ganondorf: Strange . . . [falls down and drinks his tea] Now . . . where was I? Oh, yeah . . . I think I just said; AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Ganondorf: I'm the mighty Gano . . . erm . . . *coughcough* (high-pitched voice) I'm . . . erm . . . I'm Noodu . . . the Gerudo . . . the FEMALE Gerudo . . .

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Ganondorf: OH YES I NEED TO SCREAM!!! AND I JUST WANT TO POINT OUT THAT I EAT YOUR BELOVED FLUFFY BUNNIES FOR BREAKFAST!! AS WELL AS LITTLE PUPPIES AND KITTIES AND BIRDIES AND HORSIES AND ELEPHANTIES AND OTHER CREEPY ANIMALS!!!!!

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Ganondorf: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE E EEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!! [runs into a doorframe]

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Ganondorf: I'M THE ALMIGHTY QUEEN OF ARMADILLOS!!!!!

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Ganondorf: Is that edible? [points at his Triforce]

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Ganondorf: GAH!!! MY EYES!!!! THEY'RE BURNING!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! [runs around in circles]

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Ganondorf: (singing) When I was a little boy, I used to be upset. My skin, my eyes my hair and such - it really made me mad. But now than I am older, and I'm an evil king, I'm full of joy and happiness and I would love to sing!

- - - - - - - - - - -

Ganondorf: Oooh, Santa - it is you! But since when are you wearing a bra? [passes out]

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Ganondorf: [breaks down in tears] I only created you because my father left me when I was a little child! All I wanted was a person who would understand me!!

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Ganondorf: LET'S TAKE OVER THE *hic* WORLD!!

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Ganondorf: All . . . . the birds . . . . flying . . . . around . . . . my head . . .

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Ganondorf: I'M CALM! I'M OKAY!! THERE'S NOTHING WRONG!! MY LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL AND FULL OF HAPPINESS!! *twitch* *foam* *twitch*

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Ganondorf: Just about everything might kill me!! AAAAHHH!!! [hides under the bed]

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Ganondorf: GET YOUR STUPID BRIGHT BUTT OUTTA MY SIGHT OR I'LL RIP YOU INTO TINY LITTLE PIECES AND FEED YOU TO ALL THE LOVELY ANIMALS!!!

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Ganondorf: My . . . . . mommy . . . . . doesn't . . . . love me . . . . anymore . . . . .

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Ganondorf: [crouches in a corner] I'm sane . . . . I'm sane . . . . I'm sane . . . . I'm sane . . . . I'm sane . . . . I'm sane . . . .

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ END FLASBACKS ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

[meanwhile Dr. Frank has called two of his assistants who're dragging Ganondorf away]

Ganondorf: [in a strait jacket] NO!!! I'M SANE!!! THAT'S THE FAULT OF THIS QUEST!!! THE QUEST!!!! IT'S JUST THE QUEST!!! I'M SANE!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!

Queenie: Ts, ts, ts. Terrible how people can freak out.

Dr.Frank: Oh yes, indeed.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Dr. Frank: So, we had an appointment today?

Queenie: We did, we did.

Dr.Frank: Well then let's go. After you. [he points at a door]

Queenie: Thanks. SHAZAAAAM!!! [she runs through the wall beside the door]

Dr.Frank: What a nice person. GALABAZOOOOOOOOO!!! [he runs into the doorframe and passes out]

Cucco: Bwaaaak?

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[later, in Dr.Frank's therapy room]

Dr.Frank: Ladies and Gentlemen!

Epona: AHEM!

Dr.Frank: Sorry. Ladies, Gentlemen and horses!

Lord Laceration: . . . . . . . . .

Dr.Frank: Oh. Right. Ladies, Gentlemen, horses and daggers!

Pitchfork: . . . . . . . .

Dr.Frank: Okay, okay. Jeez, Ladies, Gentlemen, horses, daggers and pitchforks!

Cucco: Bwaaaak!

Dr.Frank: That's it. FOLKS! Welcome to our annual awesome author therapy thingy! I came to tell you, that I'll cancel the annual awesome author therapy thingy this year. Because . . . . I felt like doing so. MWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! [runs away]

All: . . . . . . . . . .

Queenie: Uhm . . . .

Lunatic Pandora: FREE SHRINK-LESS THERAPY!!!!

All: YAY!!!

TheOminousWriterofDoom: Let me be the shrink! Let me be the shrink!

Obitwokenobi: But I want to! But I want to!

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: Shut up and stop repeating everything! Shut up and stop repeating everything!

All: Aaaawww! Aaaawww!

Lady Storm: SHUT UP AND LOOK WHAT GANONDORF DID TO MY HUSBAND!!

Lord Laceration: . . . . . . . .

Pitchfork: . . . . . . .

Lord Laceration: . . . . . . .

Pitchfork : . . . . . . . ..

All : (except Lady Storm) Aaaaawwww !!

Lady Storm: Aaaww??? HE'S BETRAYING ME WITH A PITCHFORK IN FRONT OF MY EYES!!!

Queenie: And why's that Ganondorf's fault?

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS GA . . . HIS FAULT!!!

Saru-Saru: Yeah, right.

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: Grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Saru-Saru: Grrrrrrrrrr!!!!

Epona: CAT FIGHT!! WOOOHOOO!!!

Lickmaflaminlamabitch+SaruSaru: -_-*

Epona: Aaaaaawwwwww!

Lady Storm: I WILL BE BACK!!! [jumps out of the window]

Queenie: Erm . . . . . .

Lord Laceration: . . . . . . . . . . . .

Obitwokenobi: Can I be the supreme evil instead of Lady Storm?

EvilGuy: But I want to be the supreme evil instead of Lady Storm!

Obitwokenobi: I want to!!

EvilGuy: I want to!!

Obitwokenobi: I want to!!

EvilGuy: I want to!!

Obitwokenobi: I want to!!

EvilGuy: I want to!!

TheOminousWriterofDoom: SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!

Obitwokenobi+EvilGuy: . . . . .

TheOminousWriterofDoom: I will be the supreme evil instead of Lady Storm!

Lunatic Pandora: Why you little-

[EvilGuy, Obitwokenobi, TheOminousWriterofDoom and Lunatic Pandora get into a fight while the girls discuss . . . . uhm . . . . stuff]

Queenie: And then I told the king to fu-

Sailor Aries: THE PINK RICE CRISPIES ARE OUT TO GET ME!!! [hides under a carpet]

Queenie: She was actually supposed to appear in part two . . . .

Sailor Aries: I WILL BE BACK!!!! [jumps out of the window]

Queenie: Why does this sound so familiar to me?

Akila: Because you are highly intelligent and have the ability to remember everything once you've heard it?

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

All: Nooooooooo . . . . .

Saru-Saru: WHERE IS HE? WHERE IS HE?

Akila: Where's who?

Saru-Saru: Gan-

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! [jumps out of the window]

Saru-Saru: . . . . dalf.

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: [trying to climb through the window, back into the room] I . . . . am . . . . fine . . .

Puni: Funny. And I thought she was going to say Ganondorf.

Lickmaflaminlamabitch: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! [falls down again]

Puni: Whoops. ^_^**

The Zelda Master: [watching the boys] Uhm . . . . guys?

Obitwokenobi: &%/)/(/?=()%$89857=()%&&/!!!

TheOminousWriterofDoom: "/&%§/)/(=?=()/(%&/(=(!!!!!!!

The Zelda Master: Guys?

EvilGuy: *kick* *splat* *punch* *curse*

Lunatic Pandora: &)&%)&=/(&%&/)&/%))&/(%!!!!

TheOminousWriterofDoom: LADIIIIEEEES!!!!

TheOminousFangirlsOfDoom: GO OMI! GO OMI! GO OMI! GO OMI!

TheOminousWriterofDoom: Yay! Uhm . . . . &//&(%)=()(%%(=/%!!!!!!!

The Zelda Master: I said . . . .GUYS!!??

Obitwokenobi: *kick* *kick* *strangle* *curse* *kick*

The Zelda Master: Grrr . . . . . SHUT UP OR I'LL CHOP YOU TO PIECES WITH MY MIGHTY ANIT-FISH-FREAK-BLADE!!!!

- silence -

All: O_O

The Zelda Master: Thanks. Uh, so can anyone tell me what time it is?

All: o__O***********

EvilGuy: I . . . . . was . . . . . about . . . . . . to . . . . . win!!!

The Zelda Master: Uhm, hehe, sorry?

EvilGuy: *twitch* *twitch* *foam*

The Zelda Master: . . . . . . . help?

EvilGuy: DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! [jumps at The Zelda Master]

The Zelda Master: EEP!!! [jumps out of the window]

EvilGuy: COME BACK YOU &/))=)/$=)/(/)%/(!!!!! [jumps after her]

Obitwokenobi: One second! Where is my wallet???

Lunatic Pandora: And my watch???

Obitwokenobi+Lunatic Pandora: GET THEM!!!! [jump out of the window]

Puni: [holds a wallet and a watch in her hands] *whistle*

The Zelda Master: (in the distance) That's not a proper way to treat the Fangirl of Time!!!

EvilGuy: (in the distance) HACK! CHOP! HIIIYAAAH!!!!

Obitwokenobi+LunaticPandora: (in the distance) REVENGE!!!!!

All: . . . . . .

Puni: Uhm . . . . Visa anyone?

Lady Storm: [appears] HA-HA!! May I present you my new husband; BARON BAZOOKA!!!

Baron Bazooka: . . . . . .

Lord Laceration: . . . . . .

Lady Storm: He's not fat! He's just big boned!!!

Lord Laceration: . . . . . .

Lady Storm: Whoa, hold it! YOU were the one who decided to . . . . to . . . . screw a pitchfork!!

Pitchfork: . . . . . . .

Lady Storm: Yeah, so? What if I'm calling you a slut?

Pitchfork: . . . . . . . .

Lady Storm: You wanna take it outside???

Pitchfork: . . . . . . . .

Lady Storm: Why you little-

Lord Laceration: . . . . . .

Pitchfork: . . . . . . .

Lady Storm: Okay, that's it!! Outside - now - you two against me two!! [grabs Lord Laceration and the pitchfork and jumps out of the window]

Baron Bazooka: . . . . . . [disappears]

- silence -

SilverCrystal Valkyrie: I, as the priestess of the Fire Temple have decided to take over this therapy. We shall no longer do insane things for there is only one thing for an author to do!

All: ?_?

SilverCrystal Valkyrie: LIMBO!!!

All: YAY!!

Narrator: And so everyone was dancing Limbo, until . . . .

GuseBat: DIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!

All: O_O

GuseBat: DIE!! [stabs wall] DIE!! [stabs wall] DIE! [stabs wall] Die! [stabs wall]

Kaiobit: Uh, you must excuse her but she's a bit . . . . a huge bit . . . uhm . . . .

GuseBat: DIE!! [stabs wall] DIE!! [stabs wall]

Kaiobit: You see what I mean . . .

GuseBat: BEHOLD THE POWER OF PIE!!!

Wall: [crashes down onto GuseBat]

GuseBat: x___x

Kaiobit: Mweehehehehehehehehehehehehe! [disappears]

Queenie: I wish we could have a serious therapy once!!

All: O_______O

Queenie: Jeez, I was just kidding. GALABAZOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

All: YAY!!

Queenie: But now excuse me, I have to . . . . uhm . . . . do . . . . important . . . . stuff.

Saru-Saru: Like what??

Queenie: Like . . . uhm . . . . *whisper*

Saru-Saru: Ooooooh!

Iceprincess: Tellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellmetellm etelltellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellmetellmetelltellme tellmetelltellme-

Queenie: OKAY !!! *whisper*

Iceprincess: ^__^

Puni: You mean . . . . *whisper*

Queenie: Uh huh.

Queenie,Saru-Saru,Iceprincess+Puni: INTERNATIONAL WATCH-YOUR-FAVORITE-VIDEO-GAME-CHARACTER-IN-THE-SHOWER-CLUB UNITED!! YAY!!! [they disappear]

Narrator: After the four obsessed fangirls had left, there were only four other people in the room . . . .

TheOminousWriterofDoom: Well . . . .

SilverCrystal Valkyrie: Yeah . . . . .

Akila: Uhm . . . .

Epona: So . . . . .

Anime Obsessor YR: [appears] DON'T FEAR THE DAMSEL OF DYNAMITE IS HERE!!! [opens her trench coat to reveal a time bomb]

All: O___O

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[outside]

Link: I moose wonder what they are coffin doing in the-

- KABOOOOOOOOM!!!! -

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Chapter 31 of The Troublesome Quest For Sanity was brought to you by

DD Double Dash Dynamite and

Queenie û