Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Final Fantasy X: Rewrite ❯ Attack of the drunk Auron! ( Chapter 1 )

Hi all, this is my first fic on Mediaminer ^_^, hope you liiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiike it

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-[Final Fantasy X: Rewrite]-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

-Mt Gagazet/Zanarkand-

Rikku: Ooooooooooooooooooooooh fire ^_^ *touches fire* OH GOD IT BURNS...IT BURNS!!!! *rolls on ground screaming*

Everyone: o_O

Tidus: I'm going to go off and have a vodka

Yuna: Can I come!?

Tidus: *puts hand on Yuna's shoulder*..Sorry

Yuna: Aw nuts

Tidus: *walks off*....Listen to my story...this maybe our last chance

Wakka: WHAT DID YOU SAY!?!

Tidus: -_-...I SAID LISTEN TO MY FUCKING STORY BAKA!!

Wakka: Well Soooooooo-rry!

Tidus: *sweatdrop*...Anyway

-Flashback-

Tidus: oooooooooooooooooh yeeeeeeeeeeah *eats hotdog*

-Gagazet/Zanarkand-

Tidus: WRONG FLASHBACK!!

Rikku: o_o....I like hotdogs, I LOVED THEM *cries* WHY MUST YOU DEPRIVE ME OF MY HOTDOGS...WHY!!!!!

Kimahri: O_o

-Zanarkand (In flashback =P)-

Tidus: *walks out of his house* I am such a stud

Yuna: DIE *stackles Tidus*

Tidus: Your not meant to be here

Yuna: Whoopsy doodle *vanishes*

Tidus: *walks out to his fans*

Chibi Fan: Can you sign this!?

Tidus: Sure...got a pen?

Chibi Fan: No

Tidus: Thats okay...I'll use my fist and make it seem like I am writing something

Chibi Fan: YAY!!!

Tidus: *signs and throws Blitzball and fans head, causing him to fall into the water*

Chibi Fan: x_x

Girl: Sign this *opens bra*

Tidus: Habababababababababababaaaaaaaaaaaaa *drools*

Girl: ^_^

Yuna: DIE!!!!!!! *slices Girl's head off*

Tidus: -_-..your not is this yet

Yuna: Eep *runs*

Girl:...The...pain x_x

Tidus: Well, I gotta go..cheer for me

Kids: 2..3...TEACH US HOW TO BLITZ

Tidus: How about, NO, scott

Kids: Were not called Scott

Tidus: *sweatdrop* Uh...*runs*

-Highway-

Announcer: I was in the coffee shop, running away from home when I heard the news. Our hero----

Tidus: Do you mind turning that mic down..I can here it from here!!

Announcer: FINE!!!

-Blitzball Stadium-

Fans girls: Its Tidus!!!! ^__________________^

Tidus: I thought I destroyed you!

fan girls: Never *latch onto Tidus* Love us ^_^

Tidus: KAME-HAME-HA!!!!!

Fan Girls: x_x

Tidus: Heh *walks inside*

-Stadium-

Tidus: ZzZzZzZz..Ooh, I always liked hookers...ZzZzZzZzZzZzZz

Yuna: *kicks Tidus in the groin and runs*

Tidus: DAMN IT YUNA!!.....oh, the game starting ^_^

-Outside-

Auron: *walking on pylon thingy dunk* heh *points at Sin* So you think your *hic* better then me huh...I'll show you *swings his fist and Sin and falls off the building*

Sin: >_<..NO ONE FIGHTS ME *destroys Zanarkand*

-Stadium-

Tidus: *jumps out of water* heh..cool camera angle *looks at Sin*...Oh fu---

*Stadium Gets destroyed*

-Outside-

Tidus: *falls head first into ground* x_x

Kid: *kicks Tidus* FREAK!! *runs*

Tidus: I'LL GET YOU KID, YOU AND THAT LITTLE DOG OF YOURS!!!

Auron: *stumbles onto screen* Hiyah Tidus *hic*

Tidus: Your drunk arn't you....Auron, what are you doing here

Auron: I was waiting for you *falls over* hee hee...I fell

Tidus: o_O

-Highway-

Tidus: *runs only to have everything freeze* Dammit..I knew I should of rejected that fans drugs!

Fayth: It begins

Tidus: Your damn right it begins..now I'm going to have one hell of a headache...damn drugs

Fayth: -_-..not like that

Tidus: Who are you

Fayth: The Fayth

Tidus: Like Faith on Buffy?

Fayth: NO!!!!..ah fuck it *vanishes*

Tidus: CURSE YOU DRUGS...CURSE YOU!!!! *runs after Auron*

-Down the Highway-

Tidus: Hey..not this way, it leads to the bar!

Auron: well..DUH!! *looks up at Sin* We called it...Kefka

Tidus: O_o

Auron: I mean..Sin, yeah thats it *hic*...*stumbles and nearly falls off highway* Ooooooooh..purty

Sin: -_- *spits out 5000 small fiends*

Auron: I can take em all on!

Tidus: Just gimma a sword

Auron: So you wanna see my sword huh?

Mirai Trunks: I WILL FOREVER BE CURSED BY THAT QUOTE..CURSE YOU FUNI!! *vanishes*

Tidus: o_O..just gimme my damn sword

Auron: *fine*

Tidus: Uh Auron..thats Lulu's Onion Knight

Auron: *hic* Soooooooooory *hands him sword*

Tidus: Thanks *cuts fiend*

Fiend: Ack..so this is were it all ends....my life, forever gone, taken by this smitten hero---

Tidus: JUST SHUT UP AND DIE!!

Fiend: *points dramaticlly* Guess I'm going to the giant pixel in the sky *dies*

Auron: *hic* He's got nuttin on me!

-Later on down the highway-

Sinspawn Ammes: So..we meet agian!

Tidus: o_o..uh, this is the first time we have met

Ammes: Thanks for ruining the scene

Auron: *hic* YEAH!!

Tidus: Shut up and Get out of my town

Ammes: FEAR MY DEMI!!!!! *casts Demi*

Tidus: It only did 4 damage numbnuts

Ammes: *runs off* MUMMY!!!!!

Auron: I sure showed him! *does drunken victory pose*

Tidus: o_o..Uh, right *runs on*

-Once agian..down the highway -_-

*45904385609437534863487563487534658934756 fiends appear*

Fiend: MWAH HA HA HA HA

Auron: Hmmm..this could be bad

Tidus: COULD BE!?!!?

Auron: That..knock it down *hic*

Tidus: But thats Wakka

Auron: DO NOT ANNOY ME..I CONTROL YOUR BRAIN!!!

Tidus: No you don't

Auron: BE QUIET!!

Tidus: Fuck this -_- *hits Tanker*

Building: *explodes and falls through highway* x_x

Sin: *grabs Hoover vacume cleaner* Time to suck you up! ^_^

Tidus: NO!!

Auron: This is your story

Tidus: well..DUH!, I am the main character

Auron: Thems fightin' words *mauls Tidus*

Tidus: x_x

*Tidus and Auron get sucked up into Sin*

----

Hope you liked it ^_^
More to cooooooooooooooooooome