Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ What ifs ❯ 1 ( Chapter 1 )

1. Summary: What if youkais decided to attack Sanzo-ikkou in the bathroom? Naked bishes, anyone?

{Author's explanations/comments}

[Characters actions]

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Youkai leader: Okay, here's the plan, we attack them when they are in the bathroom.

Youkai No-1: [Points at him.] Hentai!!!!!!!

Youkai leader: [Bashes him on the head.] Baka!!

Youkai No-1: .... [Swirly eyes with bumps on the head.] {Hmmm..Probably serious head injuries but still good enough to last for a few other rounds of baka-bashing.}

Youkai leader: If we attack them while they are having their bath or shower that means…

Youkai No-2: They are naked!!! [Points finger at him.] Hentai!!!!!!

Youkai leader: [Veins popping then proceed to bash him up] No!!! That means they won't have their weapons and their guard will be down!! [Takes out a microphone and shout] UNDERSTAND!!!!!!

All Youkais: ... [Swirly eyes] {All the youkais faint because they got blown away by the sound waves.}

{After a while of commercial break.}

Youkai leaders: Okay, let's go.

All Youkais: [Recovered] Hai!!!!!

Youkai leader: Bakas!! Not so loud, go sneak in.

{Keep in mind that all four of them are under attack at the same time.}

First we have ...

Gojyo in the shower.

Gojyo: La!!La.LaLaaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Youkai: Wah, his singing is worse than Kougaijisama's. [Cringes]

Fangirls of Gojyo: Nani?!! Our Gojyo can do no wrong! How dare you critize him! Shinnei!! [ Bashes youkai]

{I can't bear to look so I only hear the sounds of the crazed fangirls bashing the youkai.}

Youkai: {Dying screams} AHHHHhhhhh..[Youkai died]

Fangirls: {Looking so innocent and sweet that I can't help but distrust them when they said.} Welllll, since we are here [Looking shyly at their feet] and Gojyo are there. [Looking at Gojyo's direction]

We might as well TAKE A PEEK [Kiyah!!! So their true colors came out for a few seconds.] or two. So shh everyone.

Fangirls: [Creep, creep, creep. Doki.Doki.Doki.] [Saw Gojyo naked.] KiyaHHHHHH!!!!! GOJYO!!!!!!! [Glomp him good]

Sanzo and his bathtub.

Youkai leader: Ha! Ha! Ha! Genjo Sanzoooblubbbblubb!

Sanzo: Urusei!! [Dunks youkai's head into the tub, Madonna style.] I came here for a relaxing aromatherapy recommended by Hakkai {Well, looks like it didn't work maybe he should try some yoga instead.}

[Dunks his head] to destress {as in distress get it? Ha! Ha!Ha!}myself before I bash those two idiots when I see them again and you have to disturb me! ShinnnEi!!! [Dunks his head]

Hakkai in the shower.

Hakkai: Hmmm. ..Humm.. Dum. {Errr, is this how you hum? Shrugs*}

Youkai: [Tiptoe.tiptoe.tiptoe, shoves aside the shower curtain.] AhH ahah! I got you now Cho Hakkai!!

Hakkai: [Screams] Iiiiiieeeeeeyahh!! [Blasts youkai with his power] Shimatta! Now he knows I am a closet cross-dresser.

Goku in the shower.

Goku: Strawberry and chocolate ice cream, meat buns, meat pies, apple pies, pizza, fried chicken. Wah!! Cheese cake!!

{Uh.. in case you guys are wondering. He is not singing he is actually - }

Youkai: Eating?!!!!! In the shower!!?!!

Goku: Huh?! [Saw youkai] I hide all this food from Gojyo now you want it too?! Nyoiyibu!!!
Everyone came out of their bath/shower squeaky clean.

Hakkai: Ah, did everyone have a nice time in the bathroom? [Notice that Gojyo is missing.] Eh?! [Turning his head to look for Gojyo] Squeak, squeak Where is Gojyo?

Sanzo: Who cares? Squeak, squeak [Digging his left ear.]

{But I do for the sake of everyone's' curiosity!!!! I'll go.}

Gojyo: HELP!!!!!! Fangirls overdose!!! Trrrr..yy..ing to.. bbbr.e.ath!!! {Ah, no wonder. His fangirls are still glomping him. Such superb strength. Oh, look! He is turning blue, no purple, red, no - again purple, green, yellow. }

{Oh, well.shrugs* That's all folks!!}

[Loony tunes' ending song]

Gojyo: Wait!!! Save meeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!

~Owari ~

Gojyo: That was NOT funny.

1. Fluffy: You are just angry because no one saved you. I think it's funny. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Gojyo: No, I was angry because you asked all the grandmas and aunties to act as my fangirls! I got better taste than you! Next time, I choose the fangirls.

1. Fluffy: But I did try to get supermodels to play the part ..

1. Gojyo: Then??

1. Fluffy: But they want a few extra millions to glomp you for each second! I'm broke so. Then I met them when I accidentally dropped your picture at the park. These really nice ladies who offered to do it for free!!! Quite a bargain, wouldn't you say, Hakkai?

Hakkai: Hai. Hai. Quite a bargain. @ - ^

Fluffy: Reviews much appreciated everyone!!!!! Also next let's talk about what if Sanzo's gun was put under a really weird spell. What is Sanzo going to do?

Sanzo: Kill you if you ever touch or do anything to my gu- [Tinkling]

Sanzo: What was that? [Looking so dangerous that he made some fangirls faint.]

Fluffy: Oh, That! It's just my magic wand. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Sanzo: [Looks closer.] You are drunk!! Gojyo!!!!!

Gojyo: Hee,heee, hee. Just a little payback, which she will feel it when she wakes up tomorrow.

Fluffy: Hai! Hai! Ha!! Ha!!! Haaaaa!! [Faint]

Sanzo: Oi! Wake up you have to fix my gun or I'll…

Fluffy: ZZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzz