Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Burnout ❯ Chapter 24 ( Chapter 29 )

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Chapter Twenty-four

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The banged boy stared out of the large bay windows out into the garden. He couldn't believe the amount of people that had gathered for Quatre's funeral, and memorial service. All of the blonde's sisters, minus Iria and Dorothy, the Maganac corps, Zechs, Noin, Une, Catherine. . .

"Oh, God. . ." He murmured, "I knew he touched people, but I had no idea. . ."

Relena and several of the girls from her school arrived, each baring a single white rose in honor of their friend, An old peddler from Sanc, Sally and Wu Fei, Hiiro. . .

"Where's Duo?" He frowned, noticing that Hiiro was alone.

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"Hiiro. . ." Relena offered a small smile towards the boy's direction. Then she looked around and quirked an eyebrow, "Where's Duo?" she asked.

"He. . . He's not coming. . ." The boy glared at the grass.

"I'm sorry, Hiiro. Quatre was his best friend, I'm sure this must be difficult for him."

"Yeah. . ."

"How are you?"

"Hn." He grunted as he turned to leave.

"Hiiro. . ." Relena sighed. "It's okay, you know. . . He was your friend too."

Hiiro paused for a moment before leaving the former Queen and returning to the house.

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Wu Fei frowned as he saw Hiiro return to the mansion. He looked up into what used to be the blonde's bedroom and saw the shadow of someone standing there in the window.

"Trowa. . ." He sighed, "I think you hurt worse out of all of us, yet you refuse to show it. . ."

"Wu Fei?" Sally asked, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. He looked at her. "Are you okay? You seem really distracted."

"I. . ." He stopped, and thought about what he wanted to say, "I'm concerned that maybe Quatre isn't the only pilot we've lost."

"Trowa."

"And Duo. . ."

"And if Duo goes, Hiiro won't be far behind." A young woman's voice cut in. They turned to face Relena. "Forgive me." She apologized, "I didn't mean to eavesdrop. I was just coming to ask you about Hiiro." She looked down at the ground, "He doesn't look well."

Sally and Wu Fei exchanged glances. "I'm not sure he knows how to cope with all of this." The doctor said quietly.

"I'm not sure I know what you mean." Relena frowned.

"It's not in his programming." Wu Fei explained. "He was told to follow his emotions, but at the same time he was taught that emotions are hindrances to the mission."

"He's very confused right now."

"Trowa is another one who really doesn't know how to cope. He keeps everything locked up inside."

"The only person he ever really spoke to was Quatre." Sally said sadly.

"And Duo?" Relena asked.

Wu Fei sighed, "Duo. . . His way of coping is to make a joke out of everything, and he can't do that here. He doesn't know what to do either."

"Quatre was kind of the glue that held everyone together."

"What about you, Wu Fei? You seem to be doing fine, considering everything."

The Chinese boy glared at the grass. "I handle loss in my own way."

"Oh." Relena nodded, deciding not to press the matter.

Sally looked at how uncomfortable Wu Fei had become, "Relena," She smiled, "If you'll excuse us?"

"Of course." Relena apologized, "I didn't mean to intrude."

"Thank you, Sally." Wu Fei whispered, gratefully.

Sally smiled again, "Any time, Wu Fei."

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Duo sat on the window sill, his arms hugging his knees to his chest. His head rested on his arms, a blank expression on his face. He stared out of the window, down at the crowd.

Some of them were crying, but some of them were laughing and chatting as if it weren't a sad occasion.

Duo glowered at those people angrily. He couldn't understand how they could be happy. He just couldn't understand it. `DAMN IT!' He choked back tears, `They should be feeling sad, they should be bawling their eyes out or screaming at the injustice of such a good soul dying. . .'

"Duo. . ." a gentle voice called to him from the door way. "Duo, look at me."

Duo stared straight out the window, and didn't even acknowledge the person, though his frame became tense.

A timid hand hovered just above the braided boy's shoulder, as if trying to determine whether or not to touch the boy. Finally the hand gripped the black clad shoulder, "Duo, do you think Quatre would want you to sulk like this?"

Duo still didn't respond.

"Duo you're not being fair to him."

"FAIR!?!" Duo yelled, whipping around and pushing the person back, "QUATRE'S THE ONE WHO'S NOT BEING FAIR! WHY'D HE HAVE TO GO AND DIE? THIS ENTIRE THING ISN'T FAIR! NOT TO HIM, NOT TO ME AND NOT TO TROWA! SO DON'T TALK TO ME ABOUT BEING FAIR!!!"

Hiiro looked at the braided boy, an impassive mask on his face. This was the most animated Duo had been since he heard of Quatre's fate. Now, the braided boy stood before him, trembling in repressed anger and grief. He looked as if he wanted to run, or hit something, or scream, or break down and cry his heart out, but couldn't seem to make up his mind. "Duo. . ." He sighed, "It's not fair. Nothing ever is. He did so much for other people, so much. . . that he just had a burnout. . . Quatre was a good person, and a strong soldier, and he was your friend. . ."

Duo began to shake his head, "No! NO! NO!" He wailed, tears finally falling down his face, "I was no friend of his. . .Oh, God! Hiiro!" He fell to his knees, weeping.

Tentatively, Hiiro knelt next to the boy and wrapped his arms around the boy. "It's okay, Duo." He promised.

"I didn't help him! I didn't even realize he was hurt! He needed me and I wasn't there!" He sobbed, "I wasn't there! I didn't even say goodbye. . ." He sobbed inconsolably, "I didn't even get to say goodbye. . ."

The Japanese boy rubbed the American's back, and let him cry. "You can say goodbye to him now." He suggested. "And remember what you loved about him."

"I don't have a place there. . ." Duo sniffled with a hiccupping whisper, "I'm no friend of his. . ."

"That's a load of shit." Hiiro said bluntly. "You were his best friend, and he'd be really disappointed to know that you were kicking yourself like this."

Duo didn't respond, his grip on Hiiro grew tighter though. "Hiiro. . ." He whispered, "Why him? Why not me? I'm Shinigami. . ."

"And you wear Pikachu boxers while watching Saturday anime. . ." Hiiro teased.

Duo glared at him, before his tears came again and he buried himself into Hiiro's embrace, "I feel awful, Hiiro. . . and there's nothing I can do to make this better. . ."

"So?" Hiiro asked, "You don't have to. Sometimes it's okay to just go with the flow."

The braided boy didn't have anything to say to that, so for once in his life, he just remained silent.

"It's almost time for the service." Hiiro said, still rubbing the boy's back, "Trowa is supposed to give the Eulogy. I'm sure it would mean a lot to both him and Quatre if we were all there to support him."

"I. . .I can't, Hiiro. . ." Duo whispered, almost sounding scared.

"Why not?"

The boy swallowed hard, "If. . . If I go to the funeral. . . It means that he's really not coming back. . . that I'll never see him again. . ."

"But Duo, you already knew this." Hiiro pointed out. "It'll probably help you feel better. . ."

"But I. . ." Duo looked up at his Koi, "I . . ."

"Do it for Quatre."

With a heavy sigh, Duo nodded his agreement.

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Trowa stood at the pulpit, next to the open grave, and felt strangely at peace. He half expected to be nervous, considering his lack of communication skills, and the large amount of people gathered. But he was calm, serene. It was almost as if Quatre was standing next to him encouraging him.

He cleared his throat and began to speak.

/"Quatre Raberba Winner was the kindest, most loving person I have ever had the privilege to meet. . ." /

It seemed surreal.

/"He was an excellent pilot, and he fought for what he believed in until the very end of his young life. . ." /

Trowa paused. In the back of the crowd, he could see Hiiro and Duo as they joined the group. He also found Wu Fei and Sally. `Yes,' He realized, `We're really all here together. . .'

/"Quatre loved just about everyone and he was loved by many. . . He cherished life above all things. He was quick to forgive everyone for anything . . . except himself. . ." /

Trowa's voice cracked slightly and he paused to regain his composure. Catherine's gentle gaze met his cold emerald one.

/"Quatre once made a mistake that almost killed me. . ." /

He whispered, his speech forgotten.

/"And he never could forgive himself. . ."/

Sorrow filled Trowa and his resolve to get through this was quickly fading.

/"He never understood that there was nothing to forgive . . ."/

A hand gripped his shoulder.

/"Because I had already forgiven him. . ."/

Another hand gripped his other shoulder.

/"Because I loved him. . ."/

He turned to face those who stood with him. Wu Fei, Sally, Hiiro and Duo. . .

"We all loved him. . ." Sally said.

"And we still do . . ." Duo imputed. Hiiro squeezed his hand.

"Quatre asked me to promise him something before he died." Trowa said, looking at each of his friends, "I intend to keep my promise."

"What was it?" Hiiro asked.

"He asked that we would look after each other." Trowa whispered, a small smile crossing his face and a tear rolled down his cheek.

"I think that's a promise we will all keep." Duo said, earning nods of agreement from Sally, Wu Fei and Hiiro.

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To be continued. . .