Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Frozen Heart ❯ chapter 16 ( Chapter 17 )

Frozen Heart 16 by sage_libra (sage_libra@yahoo.com)

Disclaimers: Don't own them.

Rating: PG-13

"Alright."

It wasn't until he heard that softly stated acquiescence that Heero realized how much the word meant to him. Only then did he realize that he had been afraid, no-terrified. Terrified that he was too late. That Duo had gone beyond forgiving him. That he had forever closed the door to reconciliation with Heero.

He blinked back the sudden moisture that had filled his eyes and drew a shaky breath. "Good." was all he could utter for fear of betraying the extent of his relief.

`Good' Duo shook his head inwardly, a small sardonic smile curving his mouth. I just threw my heart back into the line of fire for you, Heero, and all you can say is `Good'. He let out a deep breath. What did you expect, Duo? He asked himself. He's already told you he wants your friendship- and that has got to have gone against the grain. You know how hard it is to get any declaration of need or weakness from Heero Yuy. Stop pushing your luck. You chose to give it a second chance, well, here it is. Start dealing again.

"Duo?" Heero suffered a pang at the sadness that crossed the mobile features. Are you regretting this already, Duo?

Duo shook his head slightly. "I'm fine." He said. "I'm fine." He repeated more decisively, dredging up a ghost of a grin. "Just trying to imagine myself piloting Deathscythe without my eyes. Hey, maybe Dr. G can make me a neural visor like the one in the sci-fi movies? There's an old movie where one of the characters was born blind, but the scientists made him an electronic replacement that allowed him to be become one of the damn best engineers in the galaxy." His grin grew as he warmed to the idea. Hell, if the scientists could create five walking death machines, then fixing him up with a neural visor shouldn't pose much of a problem, right? And with a neural visor enabling him to `see', he would be soon reunited with Deathscythe. Real excitement shot through him at the prospect.

Heero swallowed the aching lump in his throat at the poignant effort at light-heartedness. "You will see again, Duo." He promised, his tone slightly ragged with suppressed feeling. "Quatre has sworn it, and he doesn't make promises lightly."

Duo's grin wavered, then firmed, morphing into a wan smile. "I trust Quatre to do everything humanly possible, Heero. And I'm grateful whatever happens. But it's been 2 months-"

"I don't care if it takes 2 years, Duo." Heero interjected bluntly. "I won't give up. And neither will you." His tone warned against anyone-even Duo himself, casting doubt on the outcome.

Duo's smile widened. This single-minded-to-the-point-of-obsession Heero he recognized. "It's not going to be easy." He warned, recalling with trepidation the adjustments Derek and Jason had had to make for his sake.

"Nothing worth having ever is." Heero wasn't only referring to Duo's eyes, however. He was going to win Deathscythe's pilot. It was only a matter of time. And he wasn't lying. If it took two years or twenty, he was determined to bind Duo to his side for good. The promise of a lifetime basking in the warmth of Duo's smile was reason enough. Mission accepted. Slowly, the tight knot in Heero's gut began to unravel as he allowed himself to believe that Duo really was coming back to him. Really coming back to him. His eyes gleamed.

"Yeah." Duo's voice trailed off a tad uncertainly. Then the irony of the scene struck and he couldn't help a small laugh. "I never knew you could be so optimistic." Nor had he ever thought that he would have allowed his never-say-die spirit to get so battered.

Heero stared at him, mesmerized by the sound. God, he had missed Duo's laughter.

A knock on the door checked Duo's laughter and Quatre's tentative voice filtered in. "Hey, guys, can we come in now?" At Heero's positive response, the other pilots slipped in, taking their former positions around the room.

Duo cocked his head. Now that he was fully alert, he found himself listening intently to the sounds of movement, mentally placing them in his mental blueprint of his room. He frowned. He recognized Dr. G's steps. Quatre's voice gave his position away. But Trowa and Wufei were nowhere. Duo's brow knotted with concentration. He knew the two pilots had to have entered his room together with Quatre, so where were they? His frown deepened as unease crept down his spine. He needed to know where they were.

The realization that he was a hair's breadth away from calling out in order to get verbal confirmation of their positions made him pause. `Fei and Trowa were trained assassins. They all were. Stealth was second nature to them. Of course he couldn't hear them.

And that realization brought his budding optimism crashing back to the ground. Having Heero telling him that he needed him. Having him so close. It had blinded him to the realities of his circumstances.

They were his friends. His family. They wanted him back, and he had agreed because in his heart, he wanted them back in his life too. And in that moment, he had overlooked one very important issue.

It was one thing to want to have him around, quite another to actually have him around. To having to actually deal with his condition. Suddenly, his mind was flooded by scenarios and a cold fist clenched around his heart. It had taken immense patience and effort on the Wallises side to adapt to having a handicapped person around. It had been just as difficult for him to get used to having people move around him without feeling threatened or inept. God, how was he going to manage it with the other pilots when he couldn't even hear them? Panic started building inside.

**Get a hold of yourself, Maxwell!** He chided himself, struggling to pull himself together.

"Duo?" Heero had noticed the sudden shift of his mood.

Duo swallowed. Forced a grin. "I'm fine." The two words were rapidly becoming his mantra.

He trusted them, but he couldn't let himself relax around them. He needed to know where they all were with respect to his position. It was the first lesson his blindness had taught him- to be aware at all times of his surroundings. Never be caught by surprise. Never let his guard down. It was the only way to avoid tripping, falling, or bumping every time he moved. Experience had taught him that people tended to forget that he was blind, and if he didn't watch out, he could get hurt easily.

His heart sank as he realized the enormity of what he was about to undertake.

Aquamarine eyes darted from his tense features to Heero. "Heero?" Quatre asked. The query seemed to address the general issues, but his eyes locked with Heero's meaningfully.

**Have you told him how you really feel, Heero?**

Heero shook his head slightly, his tone steady when he replied. "Duo is going back with us. Inform your team to get ready. We leave tomorrow."

Quatre's disappointment on his behalf warred with joy and undeniable relief at the news. "That's great news, Duo!"

Tomorrow? Duo's eyes widened, panic suddenly rearing its ugly head. "No, wait!" He turned to Heero. "Tomorrow's too soon. I can't just disappear, Heero. I have - things- I need to attend to." The unit. Mrs. C. Jason. Derek. His sudden misgivings.

Heero frowned. "Risk of exposure increases the longer we stay, Duo."

"I know that." Duo bit his lip, his hand reaching up instinctively to grasp his braid. It was a nervous habit he had when he was wrestling with a difficult issue. Heero's heart twisted painfully when Duo's hand clenched around empty air and the pixie features tightened. Duo lowered his hand with a heavy sigh. "Look, maybe we need to slow down a bit." He said finally.

Heero stared at his averted face, unable to believe what he was hearing. "What?" He bit out.

Duo flinched, stiffening instinctively. There was no mistaking the anger radiating from the other boy, and suddenly remembering Heero's tendency to hit before he thought, Duo braced himself.

"Heero." Quatre said warningly.

But Heero was already regretting his outburst. His eyes dark with self-castigation, he moved swiftly to make amends. Ignoring the wide-eyed looks of the others, he cupped Duo's face, gently forcing the other boy to `look' at him.

"Duo, listen to me." He said, his tone quietly intense. "I swear to you now, on my honor- I will never raise my hand against you. I'll rant and rave and lose my temper, but I will never hurt you like that again. No matter what. I swear it, Duo." He went on, his voice becoming a touch ragged. "Just-don't be afraid of me. Please."

Duo was transfixed by the plea, and the emotion behind it. "Heero…"

Heero stared at the wonder in his face, the blossoming trust, and something in his heart loosened. Duo had forgiven him. Had truly forgiven him. Too overcome to speak, Heero drew Duo closer, resting their foreheads together for an interminable moment.

Quatre turned shining eyes on Trowa, who grinned at him gently.

The sound of Dr. G pointedly clearing his throat broke the mood and reluctantly, Heero drew away from Duo.

"Your point, Duo?" Dr. G asked gravely.

Duo chewed his lip, then plunged ahead. "I think you need a few days to understand what being around me really entails." He replied quietly.

"Duo-" Quatre began.

"Q, hear me out, please?" Duo cut him off. "All I'm asking is that you spend three days here with me. Just so everyone has a better idea what we're dealing with."

"Why can't we deal with it at the safehouse?" Wufei queried, genuinely puzzled.

Duo tried to grin, but it wavered and faded. "So that when you decide it's more than you can deal with, you wouldn't have to bother bringing me back here." The words were spoken softly.

Quatre stared. When, not if. His heart twisted painfully.

But his pain couldn't compare with the ache Heero felt. What will it take, Duo, to win your trust again?

"Dr. G?" Duo's voice held a plea for understanding.

Dr. G gazed contemplatively at his pilot, then at the gathered boys. He shook his head. He understood what Duo wanted. Needed. However, what Duo didn't understand yet was the strength of the other pilots' determination to get him back. It was something, he decided, that Duo needed to discover on his own.

"Three days, Duo." He said finally. "Not a minute more." He speared Heero with a glance. "I expect a full report." He rose.

"You're leaving?" Quatre asked.

Dr. G nodded. "I already have the answers I came here for." He turned to Duo. "I'll be waiting, Duo."

Duo nodded. "Thanks, Dr. G."

"Don't thank me yet." Dr. G told him bluntly.

The ominous words hung over the group long after the scientist had left.

Quatre gazed around the room and put on a determined smile. "Well, I think this calls for a celebration, don't you?" He got up. "Hope you're hungry guys, `coz we are going to have a feast."

"Q?" Duo held out a hand to Quatre's direction. "Could I talk to you for a while?"

Quatre beamed his agreement, and Trowa, seeing his joy, loosed a rare grin. "Why don't I take care of dinner?" Quatre shot him a grateful smile, reward enough on Trowa's book as he sauntered out noiselessly.

Wufei paused at the door, glancing back at Duo. "Maxwell, I-"

"Don't sweat it, Wuffles." Duo forestalled him with a wave of his hand. "I get it." Forgiveness and understanding glimmered in the violet depths.

Wufei's eyes slid to Heero, who held the dark gaze steadily. Like Duo, Heero understood Wufei's reasons for attacking Duo. However, unlike Duo, Heero wasn't quite ready to forgive and forget. Wufei read the silent promise in Heero's hard stare and nodded his acknowledgement of it. There would be no further attempts on his part on Duo's life, whether or not the latter's vision came back.

It was Heero's turn to leave. Gazing at his partner, he had to fight the urge to throw caution to the winds and pull him into his arms. But he tempered the urge, knowing that Duo wasn't ready. It doesn't matter, he told himself. He can wait. He'd wait for as long as it took. First things first, however. Duo had thrown down the gauntlet, challenging his ability to deal with Duo's blindness. He accepted the challenge readily, his newfound sensitivity clueing him in. He had to prove himself to Duo. That was, in truth, whether or not Duo admitted it to himself, what these three days were about.

"Three days, Duo." He said quietly. "Three days to test my promise. Give it all you've got." He allowed himself to brush back the unruly chestnut bangs. "But afterwards," His voice dropped huskily. "afterwards, you won't have any more excuses to hide behind."

His words, his tone made Duo shiver, something inside him leaping in response. Heero was gone before he could formulate a reply, the door closing behind him with a purposely audible click.

Quatre absorbed the bemusement on the gamine face with unashamed glee.

"Since when did he start talking in riddles anyway?" Duo muttered, coloring with embarrassment at the Arabian's chuckle.

"Oh I don't know, Duo." Quatre teased mischievously. "His meaning sounded pretty clear to me."

"As mud." Duo shot back, embarrassment turning to irritation. Heero's unusual responses were driving him crazy. The touches, the intensity of his words, the promises…it was almost as if- but that was impossible, he told himself firmly. Heero was not in love with him. It was more likely guilt rearing its ugly head, he nodded to himself. After everything had been said and done, Heero was his partner. Undoubtedly, the Wing pilot blamed himself for Duo's condition and was trying to make up for it by being extra nice. Although, he shivered again, any more of this `niceness' and he would be insane as well as blind.

-end Chapter 16

author's note: just a bit more. patience, please.