InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Battle of the Heart ❯ Battle of the Heart ( Chapter 1 )
[ A - All Readers ]
By: SilverGodFanGirl 
I am not horrendously fond of the pivotal episode where Kagome walks up on Inu and clay-face hugging under the Goshinboku and runs away and baka boy has an epiphany and decides it would be best for dear Kags to stay in her time. Then the poor girl, knowing she has alot of heartache to face, decides to stay by his side and basically give him permission to romp around chasing the dead pain in the... tail. So, I attempted to rewrite it how I wanted it. My first shot at angsty stuff!
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 02.09.2009 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.2K | Visits: 670 | Status: Completed
I am not horrendously fond of the pivotal episode where Kagome walks up on Inu and clay-face hugging under the Goshinboku and runs away and baka boy has an epiphany and decides it would be best for dear Kags to stay in her time. Then the poor girl, knowing she has alot of heartache to face, decides to stay by his side and basically give him permission to romp around chasing the dead pain in the... tail. So, I attempted to rewrite it how I wanted it. My first shot at angsty stuff!
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst | Type: Songfic | Uploaded On: 02.09.2009 | Pages: 2 | Words: 2.2K | Visits: 670 | Status: Completed
Did you see the sky
I think it means that we've been lost
Maybe one less time is all we need
I can't really help it if my tongue's all tied in knots
Jumping off a bridge, it's just the farthest that I've ever been
The sky was deceptively serene; the pristine night was reflected in golden orbs muddled by warring emotions. The forest had gone silent; the only noises to be heard were the slamming of his heart, and the ragged breathing of the retreating girl. He didn't call out to the fleeing figure; he couldn't. His tongue was lead in his mouth and his mind was numb beneath his twitching ears. 'Oh, gods this is it... what have I done?!' His mind a whirring storm, he tried to encompass the shattering he felt all the way down to a place that ran even deeper than his soul, somewhere new and frightening. As the blue flash of light in the distance marked her passing back to her time, he flattened his ears to his head, trying to muffle the screams of his inner-self, telling him to chase her...bring her back, make her understand... SOMETHING! Fear kept him planted in inaction. Fear of rejection, fear of what he would finally have to admit to himself in the act of admitting to her, fear of losing something more precious than the damned jewel, his mission, or the dead miko that plagued their existence.
It was that last thought, the thought that all he had ever lived for and all he had thought mattered in the world wasn't worth a damn if she weren't there with him when it was all over, that set his feet into motion. One in front of the other, hesitancy replaced with urgency, spurred by the renewed hope of his epiphany. The Goshinboku waved it's farewell at his back, its imposing figure a reminder that his past had died ages ago, and his future was newly minted and still fragile. His last thought as he fell into the darkness of the well made him shudder with both joy and fear:
'For her alone, I would plunge into the pits Hell!'
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
Anyplace but those I know by heart
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
I'll follow you down, but not that far
The well-house was saturated with the scent of complete and utter devastation. If a broken heart had a scent, then surely this was it: the salty tinge of her tears... sadness, fear, hopelessness, despair, betrayal. All of these emotions took on a life of their own in the small space, and it was all he could do not to retch over the knowledge he was the cause of all of it. Shakily he dragged himself over the lip of the well and slowly climbed the too few steps up to the doorway, then out into the cloudless night. Even in the large expanse of the courtyard her sadness permeated the air, and the Goshinboku's branches shook unhappily in the breeze, a reminder to the shamed hanyou... 'Don't mess this up.'
Steeling himself, he threw his chin up and strode towards her window, and after a couple seconds of hesitation he gently launched himself at room. Neither the sound of his landing or the scraping of his claws as he swung the window open disturbed the girl on the bed, heaving in silent, painful sobs, but it was impossible for her not to hear his vain attempt to gasp for breath around the despondent smells that made the air suffocating.
I think it means that we've been lost
Maybe one less time is all we need
I can't really help it if my tongue's all tied in knots
Jumping off a bridge, it's just the farthest that I've ever been
The sky was deceptively serene; the pristine night was reflected in golden orbs muddled by warring emotions. The forest had gone silent; the only noises to be heard were the slamming of his heart, and the ragged breathing of the retreating girl. He didn't call out to the fleeing figure; he couldn't. His tongue was lead in his mouth and his mind was numb beneath his twitching ears. 'Oh, gods this is it... what have I done?!' His mind a whirring storm, he tried to encompass the shattering he felt all the way down to a place that ran even deeper than his soul, somewhere new and frightening. As the blue flash of light in the distance marked her passing back to her time, he flattened his ears to his head, trying to muffle the screams of his inner-self, telling him to chase her...bring her back, make her understand... SOMETHING! Fear kept him planted in inaction. Fear of rejection, fear of what he would finally have to admit to himself in the act of admitting to her, fear of losing something more precious than the damned jewel, his mission, or the dead miko that plagued their existence.
It was that last thought, the thought that all he had ever lived for and all he had thought mattered in the world wasn't worth a damn if she weren't there with him when it was all over, that set his feet into motion. One in front of the other, hesitancy replaced with urgency, spurred by the renewed hope of his epiphany. The Goshinboku waved it's farewell at his back, its imposing figure a reminder that his past had died ages ago, and his future was newly minted and still fragile. His last thought as he fell into the darkness of the well made him shudder with both joy and fear:
'For her alone, I would plunge into the pits Hell!'
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
Anyplace but those I know by heart
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
I'll follow you down, but not that far
The well-house was saturated with the scent of complete and utter devastation. If a broken heart had a scent, then surely this was it: the salty tinge of her tears... sadness, fear, hopelessness, despair, betrayal. All of these emotions took on a life of their own in the small space, and it was all he could do not to retch over the knowledge he was the cause of all of it. Shakily he dragged himself over the lip of the well and slowly climbed the too few steps up to the doorway, then out into the cloudless night. Even in the large expanse of the courtyard her sadness permeated the air, and the Goshinboku's branches shook unhappily in the breeze, a reminder to the shamed hanyou... 'Don't mess this up.'
Steeling himself, he threw his chin up and strode towards her window, and after a couple seconds of hesitation he gently launched himself at room. Neither the sound of his landing or the scraping of his claws as he swung the window open disturbed the girl on the bed, heaving in silent, painful sobs, but it was impossible for her not to hear his vain attempt to gasp for breath around the despondent smells that made the air suffocating.
He hadn't been able to move at first, but when she clamored for the door after removing herself from the fetal position she'd had, instinct dragged him forward and he pounced on her. Feeling the intake of breath as she prepared to yell, he twisted her around to face him, and as the call for her mother escaped her lips it was muffled by his own mouth as he awkwardly swallowed her scream. She didn't struggle to separate their lips; she was too terrified and stricken to do anything more than shake like a snared rabbit, a fact that made Inuyasha cringe inside and whine out loud. Confident that she would not call out again, he gathered her up as he freed her mouth, and catapulted themselves out the window towards the courtyard.
I know we're headed somewhere, I can see how far we've come
But still I can't remember anything
Let's not do the wrong thing and I'll swear it might be fun
It's a long way down when all the knots we've tied have come undone
Throwing himself upwards, he clasped his miko to his body as he bounded from branch to branch of the Goshinboku until he was high enough he knew she couldn't escape, and low enough that it wouldn't kill him if she 'sat' him. After they'd landed on a broad branch, it was a moment before he decided to put her on her feet, fear once again gripping that new place he'd discovered just past his heart and deeper than his soul. When she was coaxed out of her huddled position and stood in front of him, her back securely placed against the trunk, eyes that were angry, hurt, and lost fastened themselves to his rosary, conspicuously avoiding his own gaze. Losing what composure he had he fell to his knees in front of her, ears flattened and tears on his cheeks. His voice, when he found it, was cracked and watery.
"I can apologize. I can say I'm sorry until the end of time, and it won't stop the hurt I caused you." Not looking up, he waited to see if she would respond. When she did, her few words were expected but painful none the less.
"No, it won't." The icy, dead tone her voice made the trickle staining his cheeks fall a little harder. Fearing he had finally lost her he felt that his pride and his heart were hardly enough to sacrifice to her, to them, so he decided to say exactly what felt. Sighing and mustering all the courage he could, he threw his heart out to her, realizing too late she had done the same to him and he'd done nothing but shatter it.
"We've come so far Kagome, and everytime we make a leap I drag us down." His tears fell freely now, and when they fell onto Kagome's feet her eyes snapped down to his head in shock. Inuyasha's...crying?! Her rigid form softened slightly as he continued. "I feel obligated to protect Kikyo; I was part of the reason for her death. She was also the first person to show me any kindness in a long time, but... you've been the only person to accept me. You've followed me wherever our mission has led us, shown me more loyalty than I'm deserving of, and this is how I repay you."
The wood displaced itself beneath her feet as her hanyou dug his claws into the wood of their perch in frustration, and when she felt the warm liquid of his blood mix with the cool wet of his tears between her toes she tentatively touched a quivering silver ear that quickly flattened even more in response to her contact. "I'm nowhere near deserving of your forgiveness, and I never will be, but I couldn't do any of this without you. And I'm not talking about jewel hunting, or fighting Naraku..."
Ignoring her anger and her fragile heart, she reached down and lifted his face to look him in the eye, scared of the reply to the question she was about to ask. Voice shaking and renewed tears falling from her eyes at the sight of her hanyou distressed to the point of openly crying, she questioned in a hushed voice,"Then what is is you can't do without me?"
"Breathe. Live. Wake up every morning. Find reason to eat, to put my feet in front of me. You are the truest reason I hunt the jewel and why Naraku must die... because I can't stand knowing there are dangers that could take you away from me. I don't deserve to ask, but please don't leave me. I promise I will never leave you, because it is you alone I would follow into the pits of hell."
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
Anyplace but those I know by heart
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
I'll follow you down, but not that far
He stood to lose just as much as she did, and yet he threw himself at her feet and her mercy. In the past she had cried, ran away, yelled, and 'sat' him every time she'd been hurt. How could he have ever truly understood how bad he hurt her every time, when she'd never had the nerve to tell him all he'd just said. He sat there in her silent gaze, all walls down in his eyes, tears steadily making their way down his cheeks and following a trail down his neck to dampen his fire rat to a darker shade of red. The disheveled mess of the hanyou she loved so much waiting at her feet, hope and fear in his watery golden orbs, broke her heart more than seeing him in the arms of the dead miko. In that instant, she knew that she couldn't possibly go a day not having him in her life, and would gladly gamble her heart to future disappointments if it meant she could stay by his side.
The smile she gave him was one that lifted his spirit and choked his heartbeat. It was one of forgiveness, but it had a sad taint to it, as if she was forgiving him for future heartaches she expected as well. He wished it was unwarranted, but he feared the possibility of hurting her again was not impossible. At least now, though, she knew just what they both stood to lose. She pulled him up, hands cupping either side of his damp, flushed face until he stood in front of her. Dropping her hands to slide her arms around his neck she gently pulled him against her and held on for all she was worth. Slowly wrapping his arms around her he hugged her to him, emblazoning her next words on his heart for strength in the future for all the hardships they were surely going to face. His ears swiveled towards her voice as it feathered across his neck and wrapped itself around him in the still night.
"I need you just as bad, Inuyasha, I always have. I'm tired of us always standing still and never going anywhere. I'm tired of running, when all I want to do is stand by you, but a person can break only so many times. I guess we'll just have to see what the final count will be, because I'm not going anywhere. If we go down, we go down together. Let me stay, Inuyasha; I will follow you until the end."
How you gonna ever find your place
Running in an artificial pace
Are they gonna find us lying face down in the sand
So what the hell now, we've already been forever damned
Anywhere you go I'll follow you down...
With a heart full of relief and adoration for the strength of the woman in front of him he pulled back to look in her eyes, the flawless night reflected in crystal-clear grey eyes. He smiled softly at her, gentle strokes of his fingers wiping away drying trails down her cheeks. "And I will chase you every time you run, no matter where."
With a light kiss on his damp neck, she smiled at the surprise in his eyes at her action. "Deal."
I know we're headed somewhere, I can see how far we've come
But still I can't remember anything
Let's not do the wrong thing and I'll swear it might be fun
It's a long way down when all the knots we've tied have come undone
Throwing himself upwards, he clasped his miko to his body as he bounded from branch to branch of the Goshinboku until he was high enough he knew she couldn't escape, and low enough that it wouldn't kill him if she 'sat' him. After they'd landed on a broad branch, it was a moment before he decided to put her on her feet, fear once again gripping that new place he'd discovered just past his heart and deeper than his soul. When she was coaxed out of her huddled position and stood in front of him, her back securely placed against the trunk, eyes that were angry, hurt, and lost fastened themselves to his rosary, conspicuously avoiding his own gaze. Losing what composure he had he fell to his knees in front of her, ears flattened and tears on his cheeks. His voice, when he found it, was cracked and watery.
"I can apologize. I can say I'm sorry until the end of time, and it won't stop the hurt I caused you." Not looking up, he waited to see if she would respond. When she did, her few words were expected but painful none the less.
"No, it won't." The icy, dead tone her voice made the trickle staining his cheeks fall a little harder. Fearing he had finally lost her he felt that his pride and his heart were hardly enough to sacrifice to her, to them, so he decided to say exactly what felt. Sighing and mustering all the courage he could, he threw his heart out to her, realizing too late she had done the same to him and he'd done nothing but shatter it.
"We've come so far Kagome, and everytime we make a leap I drag us down." His tears fell freely now, and when they fell onto Kagome's feet her eyes snapped down to his head in shock. Inuyasha's...crying?! Her rigid form softened slightly as he continued. "I feel obligated to protect Kikyo; I was part of the reason for her death. She was also the first person to show me any kindness in a long time, but... you've been the only person to accept me. You've followed me wherever our mission has led us, shown me more loyalty than I'm deserving of, and this is how I repay you."
The wood displaced itself beneath her feet as her hanyou dug his claws into the wood of their perch in frustration, and when she felt the warm liquid of his blood mix with the cool wet of his tears between her toes she tentatively touched a quivering silver ear that quickly flattened even more in response to her contact. "I'm nowhere near deserving of your forgiveness, and I never will be, but I couldn't do any of this without you. And I'm not talking about jewel hunting, or fighting Naraku..."
Ignoring her anger and her fragile heart, she reached down and lifted his face to look him in the eye, scared of the reply to the question she was about to ask. Voice shaking and renewed tears falling from her eyes at the sight of her hanyou distressed to the point of openly crying, she questioned in a hushed voice,"Then what is is you can't do without me?"
"Breathe. Live. Wake up every morning. Find reason to eat, to put my feet in front of me. You are the truest reason I hunt the jewel and why Naraku must die... because I can't stand knowing there are dangers that could take you away from me. I don't deserve to ask, but please don't leave me. I promise I will never leave you, because it is you alone I would follow into the pits of hell."
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
Anyplace but those I know by heart
Anywhere you go, I'll follow you down
I'll follow you down, but not that far
He stood to lose just as much as she did, and yet he threw himself at her feet and her mercy. In the past she had cried, ran away, yelled, and 'sat' him every time she'd been hurt. How could he have ever truly understood how bad he hurt her every time, when she'd never had the nerve to tell him all he'd just said. He sat there in her silent gaze, all walls down in his eyes, tears steadily making their way down his cheeks and following a trail down his neck to dampen his fire rat to a darker shade of red. The disheveled mess of the hanyou she loved so much waiting at her feet, hope and fear in his watery golden orbs, broke her heart more than seeing him in the arms of the dead miko. In that instant, she knew that she couldn't possibly go a day not having him in her life, and would gladly gamble her heart to future disappointments if it meant she could stay by his side.
The smile she gave him was one that lifted his spirit and choked his heartbeat. It was one of forgiveness, but it had a sad taint to it, as if she was forgiving him for future heartaches she expected as well. He wished it was unwarranted, but he feared the possibility of hurting her again was not impossible. At least now, though, she knew just what they both stood to lose. She pulled him up, hands cupping either side of his damp, flushed face until he stood in front of her. Dropping her hands to slide her arms around his neck she gently pulled him against her and held on for all she was worth. Slowly wrapping his arms around her he hugged her to him, emblazoning her next words on his heart for strength in the future for all the hardships they were surely going to face. His ears swiveled towards her voice as it feathered across his neck and wrapped itself around him in the still night.
"I need you just as bad, Inuyasha, I always have. I'm tired of us always standing still and never going anywhere. I'm tired of running, when all I want to do is stand by you, but a person can break only so many times. I guess we'll just have to see what the final count will be, because I'm not going anywhere. If we go down, we go down together. Let me stay, Inuyasha; I will follow you until the end."
How you gonna ever find your place
Running in an artificial pace
Are they gonna find us lying face down in the sand
So what the hell now, we've already been forever damned
Anywhere you go I'll follow you down...
With a heart full of relief and adoration for the strength of the woman in front of him he pulled back to look in her eyes, the flawless night reflected in crystal-clear grey eyes. He smiled softly at her, gentle strokes of his fingers wiping away drying trails down her cheeks. "And I will chase you every time you run, no matter where."
With a light kiss on his damp neck, she smiled at the surprise in his eyes at her action. "Deal."