InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Consolation Prize ❯ Truth thy name is Inuyasha ( Chapter 9 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: inkymuse 
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Supernatural / Romance / Fantasy / Drama / Comedy / Angst | Type: Divergence | Uploaded On: 07.04.2011 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.2K | Visits: 521 | Status: Completed
Anime/Manga: InuYasha Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Supernatural / Romance / Fantasy / Drama / Comedy / Angst | Type: Divergence | Uploaded On: 07.04.2011 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.2K | Visits: 521 | Status: Completed
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha, RT does. If I was the owner, Sesshoumaru, Koga, and the puppy would be living at my house and I'd be one very happy woman.
Chapter Nine - Truth thy name is Inuyasha
"Inuyasha?"
He had heard her return long before she spoke, long before she had entered the camp, but he didn't turn around. He the mighty dog demon's son was afraid. He admitted it deep within the dark parts of his soul, the woman behind him frightened him, and he didn't have the courage to turn and see what might be in her eyes.
He kept his eyes on the fire in front of him, another twig within his hand that he used to poke at the burning wood. Day had sunk into night and stars had replaced the clouds in a blanket across the sky.
Ignoring his quiet, she sat beside him.
"You stayed" her sweet voice flowed over him, "because you wanted to be with me."
He stiffened, but did not look at her.
She leaned her head against his shoulder, "you yelled because you were scared of losing me."
He stopped poking the fire his heart contracting painfully.
"You fought with Koga and came to get me, because I am that important to you that you don't want to be without me."
He shuddered as relief washed through him, "yea."
She raised her head from his shoulder and he finally turned to look at her, "I have been blind"
He nodded then conceded, "we both have."
She smiled for him and he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him, "you should know the rest" he whispered into her hair before placing a soft kiss there.
She snuggled into his embrace and he began to talk, "you know my story, you know how things came to be before I found you, but what you didn't know is how so very lonely I had been. I grew up with nothing Kagome. No friends, no family, no home, no love and no where to belong. I was adrift, a piece of flotsam that everyone kicked aside."
"Then Kikyo reached out to me and offered me a way back inside. I was seduced. The thought of finally belonging, of finally having someone, anyone that cared was a heady thing after so long living in a vacuum. The thought of having to give up a part of myself to obtain it wasn't so hard, not really. Not when you want to be part of something bigger."
He nuzzled his cheek against soft raven hair, "I never knew love, didn't have a measure or a comparison for it so I believed that it was love, and in some form it was."
"In the beginning when Kikyo was resurrected, you have to remember that our relationship was starting out as well and was in all honesty, rocky. Yet here was the memory of what I thought love was, resurrected before me along with the memory of belonging. I still craved it, that promise so I reached for it."
Needing to be closer Kagome interrupted his story long enough to crawl into his lap and wrap her arms around his waist. Smiling softly Inuyasha pulled her deep into his arms, "Something happened though, I got blindsided. This little wisp of a thing challenged me, held me, cried for me, cared for me, fought with me, and fought beside me and she never let me forget that I, Inuyasha, hanyou flotsam, was important to her."
He laughed softly, "talk about confused. For months I tried to figure out what it was you were after. No matter how much I fought against what you were coming to mean to me, no matter how much I tried to push you away you'd always wiggle back inside me," his voice dropped away.
"Even though you were turning me upside down inside, I couldn't ignore Kikyo or what we once had." he pulled away and pushed her up slightly till he could see her eyes. His palm cupped her face, "what kind of man would I have been if I hadn't honored the first woman after my mother to reach out to me and try to make my life better?"
"She was alone, Kagome. Who better in this world could understand what that meant? Understand empty nights with no laughter , no one to talk to, no one to be with? I couldn't leave her like that, I couldn't. I needed to help her, like she had helped me and now that she was in the world I could do no less than make sure she stayed safe."
He kissed her forehead, "It was a love of sorts, my first love if you want to put a number on it. But it wasn't my greatest love Kagome. You are that." He pulled her back into his arms.
"So I did what I could and I stayed, because I couldn't imagine a day without you in it, I stayed because I needed to be near you, I stayed because I couldn't exist without my heart and in staying I hurt you more than I could ever ask you to forgive me for because I couldn't tell you how I felt. I was afraid, Kagome."
He sighed pulling her deeper and confessed, "I didn't go with Kikyo in the flower village because of you. I wanted to be with you."
"It is easier to make a choice now, because I no longer have to hide my choice from Kikyo. For a very long time now, Kagome, it's been you."
"I hate it when you go back to the future because I'm so empty without you near."
"I hate your school because this is where you belong, with me and our family."
"..and I won't let Koga near you because you belong to me, Kagome and unless you make me I will never give you up."
He felt her tremble in his arms and whispered his lips brushing the raven tresses, "please stay with me, Kagome, please."
She pushed back from him and cupped his face between her hands, smiling through her tears she leaned close and whispered against his lips, "you've done it now, you're stuck." and kissed him with everything in her heart and soul.
xx
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Chapter Nine - Truth thy name is Inuyasha
"Inuyasha?"
He had heard her return long before she spoke, long before she had entered the camp, but he didn't turn around. He the mighty dog demon's son was afraid. He admitted it deep within the dark parts of his soul, the woman behind him frightened him, and he didn't have the courage to turn and see what might be in her eyes.
He kept his eyes on the fire in front of him, another twig within his hand that he used to poke at the burning wood. Day had sunk into night and stars had replaced the clouds in a blanket across the sky.
Ignoring his quiet, she sat beside him.
"You stayed" her sweet voice flowed over him, "because you wanted to be with me."
He stiffened, but did not look at her.
She leaned her head against his shoulder, "you yelled because you were scared of losing me."
He stopped poking the fire his heart contracting painfully.
"You fought with Koga and came to get me, because I am that important to you that you don't want to be without me."
He shuddered as relief washed through him, "yea."
She raised her head from his shoulder and he finally turned to look at her, "I have been blind"
He nodded then conceded, "we both have."
She smiled for him and he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him, "you should know the rest" he whispered into her hair before placing a soft kiss there.
She snuggled into his embrace and he began to talk, "you know my story, you know how things came to be before I found you, but what you didn't know is how so very lonely I had been. I grew up with nothing Kagome. No friends, no family, no home, no love and no where to belong. I was adrift, a piece of flotsam that everyone kicked aside."
"Then Kikyo reached out to me and offered me a way back inside. I was seduced. The thought of finally belonging, of finally having someone, anyone that cared was a heady thing after so long living in a vacuum. The thought of having to give up a part of myself to obtain it wasn't so hard, not really. Not when you want to be part of something bigger."
He nuzzled his cheek against soft raven hair, "I never knew love, didn't have a measure or a comparison for it so I believed that it was love, and in some form it was."
"In the beginning when Kikyo was resurrected, you have to remember that our relationship was starting out as well and was in all honesty, rocky. Yet here was the memory of what I thought love was, resurrected before me along with the memory of belonging. I still craved it, that promise so I reached for it."
Needing to be closer Kagome interrupted his story long enough to crawl into his lap and wrap her arms around his waist. Smiling softly Inuyasha pulled her deep into his arms, "Something happened though, I got blindsided. This little wisp of a thing challenged me, held me, cried for me, cared for me, fought with me, and fought beside me and she never let me forget that I, Inuyasha, hanyou flotsam, was important to her."
He laughed softly, "talk about confused. For months I tried to figure out what it was you were after. No matter how much I fought against what you were coming to mean to me, no matter how much I tried to push you away you'd always wiggle back inside me," his voice dropped away.
"Even though you were turning me upside down inside, I couldn't ignore Kikyo or what we once had." he pulled away and pushed her up slightly till he could see her eyes. His palm cupped her face, "what kind of man would I have been if I hadn't honored the first woman after my mother to reach out to me and try to make my life better?"
"She was alone, Kagome. Who better in this world could understand what that meant? Understand empty nights with no laughter , no one to talk to, no one to be with? I couldn't leave her like that, I couldn't. I needed to help her, like she had helped me and now that she was in the world I could do no less than make sure she stayed safe."
He kissed her forehead, "It was a love of sorts, my first love if you want to put a number on it. But it wasn't my greatest love Kagome. You are that." He pulled her back into his arms.
"So I did what I could and I stayed, because I couldn't imagine a day without you in it, I stayed because I needed to be near you, I stayed because I couldn't exist without my heart and in staying I hurt you more than I could ever ask you to forgive me for because I couldn't tell you how I felt. I was afraid, Kagome."
He sighed pulling her deeper and confessed, "I didn't go with Kikyo in the flower village because of you. I wanted to be with you."
"It is easier to make a choice now, because I no longer have to hide my choice from Kikyo. For a very long time now, Kagome, it's been you."
"I hate it when you go back to the future because I'm so empty without you near."
"I hate your school because this is where you belong, with me and our family."
"..and I won't let Koga near you because you belong to me, Kagome and unless you make me I will never give you up."
He felt her tremble in his arms and whispered his lips brushing the raven tresses, "please stay with me, Kagome, please."
She pushed back from him and cupped his face between her hands, smiling through her tears she leaned close and whispered against his lips, "you've done it now, you're stuck." and kissed him with everything in her heart and soul.
xx
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