InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Crazy 4 U ❯ Welcome to Psychoville ( Chapter 8 )

Legal Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha (-sobs-) and I make no profit off of this story (you can say that again) and please don't sue (not like you have a reason to) because I have no money (don't count the 78 cents I found under the couch) and I really don't want a criminal record (I already got 3 full ones.) Now please read this story (I worked really hard revising it) and review (cuz the stuff is like water to me.) Thanks people!

Author's Note - Um . . . yeah . . . oh darn it . . . I forgot. . . . OH YEAH! I REMEMBER NOW! Oh wait . . . nope that's lint . . .

Chapter 8 - Welcome to Psychoville

They walked down the street together, their footsteps echoing off the bare brick walls of the neighborhood. There were no people about and all the cars that were parked on the curb were as quiet as ghosts. The only sign of life was the occasional cat that passed their path or the sound of someone opening a window from above.

Kagome followed Inuyasha like a lost puppy; she watched as his long raven hair swung back and forth as he walked, making it appear to be as soft as silk. Something about his hair was just screaming "Touch me!" in the back of Kagome's mind. It just looked so . . . beautiful.

She reached out a hand to grasp a handful of that luxurious hair, but stopped herself. Kagome repeated over and over that it was bad and that she shouldn't do it. But the other part of her was going, "Ooooh! Pretty! Touch it! Play with it!" And being Kagome, she did just that.

He stopped short and she froze up, fearful that she had been caught in the act. But he seemed as if he had no idea what she was doing (but then again, her touch was so light, he wouldn't have felt it anyways . . .) and Kagome was grateful for that.

"I'm gonna warn you about something," he said, seriousness etched in his voice. "These people are nuts so watch your back okay?"

Kagome nearly fell over. Nuts? What kind of nuts? Like "I'm gonna kill you" nuts or "Columbus discovered Kentucky" nuts? She never got an answer because she never asked, and even if she did, Inuyasha wouldn't have replied anyways. He was already headed into a shabby little shop to their right; Kagome followed.

From the outside, Kagome could tell that it was old and rundown, probably still standing from a million years ago. The doorframe had chips of paint missing and the windows in front of the cast iron bars were cracked and broken. The whole place had an "icky" feeling to it. Not to mention that the shop made a homeless man's box look like Buckingham Palace. Walking inside, the strong smell of sawdust filled their nostrils.

"HEY MR. J!" Inuyasha called, walking in like he owned the damned place.

"YEAH?!" A voice replied, sounding as if it were coming from a far corner of the room.

"I'M IN A JAM!" Inuyasha yelled to the bodiless voice.

"YOU HAVE TOEJAM?! THAT'S NICE!" the voice answered casually.

"NO! I NEED A NEW DOOR!" Inuyasha shouted, rephrasing his whole sentence.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO THE LAST ONE?!" the voice wondered.

"I LOST IT!" Inuyasha replied.

"IT WALKED AWAY?! THAT'S ONE I NEVER HEARD BEFORE!" the voice shouted back.

"CAN WE STOP SHOUTING?!" Inuyasha asked, his throat starting to feel scratchy and dry.

"HOLD ON!" the voice said.

There was some shuffling from the back room and the sound of someone (slowly) walking towards them. This gave Kagome the chance to survey the store that they were currently in. The shop itself was filled with doors. Lots and lots of them. We're talking small doors, big doors, doors of all sizes and colors, doors that belonged on airplanes, doors made of all woods, doors made of glass, doors that belonged on doghouses, and a whole shitload more.

Then the owner of the bodiless voice appeared, scattering sawdust as he walked. He was taller than Inuyasha, but totally gray and old. He pushed his safety goggles up onto the top of his head and removed one of his gloves to give Inuyasha a nice, firm handshake.

"Ah! Inuyashie! It is so nice to see you again," Mr. J said, squeezing Inuyasha's hand so hard that his hand almost broke in half.

"Thanks Mr. J, but it's Inuyasha," Inuyasha corrected, taking his hand away from the old man to shake it a little for his hand had gone numb when Mr. J practically shattered all of his fingers. Who knew old guys had such strong grips?

"Yes, yes. Now, Inuyashie, what seems to be the problem?" Mr. J asked, leaning on a nearby counter that collapsed from his weight on it. This went unnoticed by the senile old man, and he merely crossed his arms over his chest as if he had never seen the whole incident.

"If you can believe it . . . I need a door," Inuyasha said, somewhat sarcastically. Why else would he be in a store that sold doors?

"Well you're in luck because that's what we sell here! Doors of all shapes, sizes, colors, and makers," Mr. J replied, indicating all the doors.

"I would have never guessed," Inuyasha said, sarcastically.

"Well, my boy, some things are more than they appear," Mr. J answered in spooky fortune teller's voice. Inuyasha's eyes went wide; he figured he'd just humor the old man. You'd have thought that by now, Mr. J would remember that Inuyasha was in there at least twice a week.

"So . . . you mean that, that door over there is really a portal into the brand new Blockbuster over on 27th and Main?" Inuyasha asked, feigning awe.

"If you want it to be," Mr. J replied, still in that creepy voice.

"Alright, things are getting WAY too freaky right now! This Mr. J is really starting to creep me out!" Kagome thought.

"Mr. J, this is Kagome. She's a good friend of mine," Inuyasha said, introducing Kagome to the old fart.

"Hello my dear. You can call me Mr. J," he said politely.

"Um . . . thanks," Kagome said. "It's a pleasure to meet you too."

Mr. J. pulled Inuyasha over to him and whispered into his ear. Well, he THOUGHT he was whispering, but Kagome knew that the people in China could probably hear him.

"I like her, Inuyashie. She's a keeper," Mr. J "whispered" into Inuyasha's ear.

"Um . . ." Inuyasha said, starting to turn a little red. "Yeah thanks . . . whatever."

"So, when's the wedding?" Mr. J asked.

"WHAT IN THE SEVEN HELLS ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!" Inuyasha screamed, flushing crimson.

"You just told me that you were getting married," Mr. J said, smiling at the couple.

"NO I DIDN'T!" Inuyasha shouted.

"So, did you two think of names for your children yet?" Mr. J inquired, still smiling at them.

"WHAT?!" Kagome and Inuyasha yelled in unison, both of their faces matching in a shade of red.

"You just said that Kagome here is having a little boy. Congratulations!" Mr. J said happily.

Inuyasha and Kagome were redder than tomatoes by now. This guy was insane!

"I think it's wonderful that you two have been together for eight years. I hope you are very happy together," Mr. J said as a plump woman with a saw came walking into the room.

"Hello Inuyasha!" She greeted him warmly, tucking a strand of grey curly hair behind her left ear.

"Mrs. J," Inuyasha answered seriously, totally red in the face. "I think Mr. J is having one of his moments."

"Nonsense! He's taken his medication already today," Mrs. J. said.

"Well it's not working!" Inuyasha thought, embarrassed that Kagome was meeting the nuts of the neighborhood.

"And besides, I heard from the other room that you and this young lady are going to build a life together. That is wonderful! You really needed a change of scene. That computer thing was going to eat your brain," Mrs. J scolded him.

"NO!" Inuyasha shouted.

"No what?" Mrs. J asked, clueless.

"All I want is a door. That's it," Inuyasha sighed in defeat.

"That we can do!" Mrs. J said, and she started to wave her saw thing around. Kagome just hid behind Inuyasha. She was officially scared of these people now.

"You already know the dimensions and my apartment number," Inuyasha told them.

"Yes we do!" Mr. J said, all happy like he had just inhaled a bag of pixy sticks.

"Thank you," Inuyasha replied, grabbing Kagome and nearly dragging her out the door.

"It was nice meeting you," Kagome said to them as she was escorted out of the crazy people's shop.

"And you too!" They said, waving at her like idiots.

Just as they were exiting the shop the couple called, "GOOD BYE! WE HOPE YOU TWO ARE VERY HAPPY WITH YOUR NEW DAUGHTER! WE MEAN . . . SON!"

Both of them ran down the street until they were about a mile away from the insane little shop.

"THOSE PEOPLE ARE NUTS!" Kagome cried, plopping down on the ground. It was good to get that out of her system. . .

"Yeah," Inuyasha agreed, trying to catch his breath. "But they make the best doors in all of Japan."

"They're still nuts," Kagome pointed out, just wanting to make a point.

"Oh yeah," he agreed.

Then they started walking at a slower pace, side-by-side. Kagome shivered slightly for it was starting to get a little cold out. Inuyasha noticed and asked her, "You wanna get a coffee or somethin'?"

"Um . . ." Kagome murmured, and then shuddered. "Coffee. Brings back bad memories."

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I had to serve it. When I was in college, something had to pay the bills," Kagome replied with a shrug.

"Oh," Inuyasha said, "Okay."

The girl he talked to over the AIM said that she worked in a coffee shop . . .

"Yeah, well probably a million other college students do," his conscience reminded him.

And she said she had gotten kicked out because of low grades.

"Big deal, it happens everyday," his annoying self told him.

I wonder . . .

"You're as bad as those people in the `door store,'" the voice pointed out to him.

Well, at least my annoying self-conscience would go down with me.

" . . ."

That shut you up.

"All right," Kagome said, ripping him out of the little war with his brain. "I could go for some coffee, as long as I am not the one serving it."

"Great," Inuyasha replied with a smile.

"Yeah . . ." She said, a faint blush rising in both of their cheeks.

"Why does he make me feel like this?" Kagome wondered to herself.

"Why does she make me feel like this?" Inuyasha thought with a small smile.

^__-

Awwww. They so cute aren't they? Too bad I'm gonna ruin their relationship! MUHAHAHAHAAHAAHAAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!

I'm okay.

review . . .