InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ Inuyasha's Day Off ❯ Inuyasha's Day Off ( Prologue )

Inuyasha's Day Off

ACT I

Inuyasha A. West awoke on the morning of April 14 in a definite mood not to go to school. It was a glorious, fresh spring day, no day to waste in a stuffy classroom listening to boring teachers rattle on and on about different kinds of isms-metabolism (nutrition class), socialism (that was history), Freudism (ugh-psychology class!). He sighed and looked at his nightstand clock. Six on the dot; he could already hear his irritatingly morning-person elder brother in the bathroom, blowdrying his hair out.

Sheesh, he was more like a prissy girl than any guy Inuyasha knew. Of course he would never tell him that to his face if he wanted to escape adolescence with all the limbs he was originally born with.

And Sesshoumaru was always prim and proper and a stickler for the rules. He'd never missed a day of school in his high school career-pretty damn creepy if you asked Inuyasha, but no one had asked his opinion. His guardian had simply decided Sesshoumaru set the best example, and that the younger West sibling should follow it to a tee.

Sucks to be me, Inuyasha thought glumly. But today he had a plan. He was going to enjoy this great day away from Sesshoumaru's elitism (another ism!) at school, along with all his dull teachers, and stay out of Toutousai's and Myouga's watchful eyes to boot.

He was going to ensure a relaxing day for himself and his three best friends, no matter what it took.

A quick phone call to put his plan into action.

Ring

"Hey Miroku, do you want to go to school today?"

"Nope."

"Hold on for three way calling."

"Hello?"

"Yo, Sango you're on with me and Miroku. Do you want to go to school today?"

"No way!"

"Then it's settled. Miroku, convinced your dad you're sick and stay put till you hear from me. Sango, go to school and meet up with Kagome. Then both of you wait for further instructions."

"Alright, cool man."

"What are you a spy? You know Kagome's crazy about her school work, what if she won't come?"

"That's your problem, Sango. I trust you'll take care of it. But hey, if she doesn't come, it'll be just you and me and Miroku."

"Did you hear that, my sweet? We can cuddle in the back seat as Inuyasha drives."

"Ugh, Miroku! Fine! I'll get Kagome to come along if it's the last thing I ever do!"

Click

Desperation makes the best motivation, Inuyasha smugly thought to himself. Now both girls were going. Phase one completed, now onwards to phase two: outsmarting Sesshoumaru and Toutousai (Myouga would be an easy pushover since he had a soft spot for Inuyasha).

Sesshoumaru was just about to head downstairs when he heard a horrible groan from Inuyasha's room. Sighing in disgust he pushed the door open. His younger brother was thrashing in his sheets, throwing his arm across his face.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Sess? Sesshy? Is that you? I think my health is failing."

"You never had any mental health to begin with, so I doubt it can be failing you now."

"Please get me Toutousai. Send him to me in my time of need. And come sit by my side, dear nii-chan." Inuyasha gestured for Sesshoumaru to sit at his bedside.

"Are you daft? I will do no such thing. If you are truly dying I am getting out the fireworks."

"Who's dying?" It was Toutousai and Myouga at the door.

Inuyasha screamed in pain. Myouga rushed over in concern.

"What is this?" Toutousai walked over and felt Inuyasha's forehead. His stern expression softened a bit. "Well, you do seem warm. Perhaps you should stay in today." Myouga nodded his approval. Sesshoumaru simply gaped.

"What?" he roared. "You always said a perfect attendance was mandatory! I've never been allowed to miss a day!"

"Don't be angry nii-chan, you're healthy and strong . . ." Inuyasha trailed off weakly, closing his eyes.

"I don't believe this!" Sesshoumaru had a steel gaze fixed on Inuyasha's pale face.

"Hurry along, Sesshoumaru, or you'll be late for school. You are a senior, you know."

"That's right, we promised your parents we'd take good care of you both, we have to live up to our responsibilities," Myouga added.

Sesshoumaru ground his teeth. "Well, I'll just have to check up on you, dear little brother during lunch break, then." He spun around on his heel and went down to the garage. A few moments later, Inuyasha heard angry rubber burning the blacktop of the road. He'd take care of Sesshoumaru later.

Myouga brought up some soup and pills and left Inuyasha in peace. When he and Toutousai were finally out of the house, Inuyasha jumped up and ran to the shower.

"Why? Why does he get away with everything?" Sesshoumaru spat out angrily to his only friend, Kagura. Well, she wasn't really a friend-just someone he tolerated (but that was saying a lot for Sesshoumaru's social tastes).

"Is he really sick? I hope he's okay."

"Haven't you been listening? He's faking, I know it!"

"Who's faking?"

Kagura and Sesshoumaru both turned around to see their underclassman classmate Kouga.

"My brother."

Kouga narrowed his eyes. He had hated Inuyasha ever since the new girl, Kagome, had taken a liking to him. She was always hanging out with his group. Kouga hated seeing them together, although he was always scheming to break them apart.

"Do you have a plan to catch him in the act?" Sesshoumaru appraised that question. He looked evenly at Kouga. Kagura looked back and forth between the two boys, not liking their not-so-subtle vicious looks.

"Would you be interested in accompanying me if I were to do so?"

"Absolutely." The two students shook on it. Kagura sighed and tagged along, intending to keep them from making complete fools of themselves. After all, everyone knew Inuyasha was born under a lucky star-he managed to get out of any scrape.

Miroku lay in a darkened room, the hum of a humidifier his only companion. He had to drink a gallon of cough syrup before his father was satisfied that he would "get better." Miroku shuddered at the horrible memory. The phone suddenly rang.

"Hello?" he croaked.

"Hey man."

"Hey," Miroku instantly dropped the charade of sore throat, "so what's going on?"

"You're going to have to drive. Sess took the keys to both cars, crafty bastard."

"Do you think he's on to you?"

"Who cares? I've laid a trap for him if he even tries to disturb my rest."

"I hope you know what you're doing."

"I do. Just get over here, and put the top down."

Miroku stood in the shadow of the entryway to the garage. His dad's pride and joy sat in the middle of a lighted alcove, her coat gleaming a fiery red.

"Today, you're mine."

Sango stared anxiously at the clock on the wall. Homeroom attendance would be over soon, and there was no sign of Inuyasha or Miroku. She looked over at Kagome who was scribbling down notes.

What kind of notes could she be taking in homeroom? Sango thought to herself. She really is a nut.

"Monk? Miroku Monk?"

"Uh, he's absent," Sango said uneasily. The teacher nodded.

In another classroom, only two doors down the hall, an even duller teacher was also getting to the last few names on the roll.

"West? West? West? West?" He kept droning on, so Kouga cut him off. "He's not here today. Probably faking."

"Now Kouga, I'm sure that's not so." But the teacher had a doubtful look on his face. He motioned to a short girl in the front row. "Kanna, go down to the principal's office and deliver this roster and this note." He quickly wrote a note and handed it to the girl.

Kouga grinned. He pulled out his cell phone and wrote a message to Sesshoumaru.

Kanna went into the office and waited. Finally, she was given entrance to the Principal.

She stood by his desk, warily staring at her surroundings. The principal was really freaky-he loved making his students suffer.

"How may I help you?"

"Um, Mr. Naraku? I'm supposed to give this to you." She handed him the papers.

Naraku looked over them and pulled a file out on his computer.

"Hmm. It seems Mr. West the younger has a rather poor attendance record. Six absences in the past three weeks?" His eyes narrowed and he turned to Kanna.

"Would you like to help your principal in an official school action?"

Kanna nodded happily, always seeking praise.

"Call the West residence for me please, line one."

Inuyasha was just perfecting his ode to Scottish dance when the phone rang. He couldn't find where the caller id unit was. Was that Miroku? Better to play it safe.

"H-Hello?" he whispered weakly. "Oh Mr. Naraku, I'm ill today. Didn't my guardian let you know? Oh I see, sorry for the con-cough-fusion."

Crafty bastard, Naraku thought. He motioned for Kanna to call him on the second line.

"Oh, it seems I have another call, excuse me Mr. Naraku," Inuyasha hacked.

He answered the other call just as weakly. Obviously he wouldn't be caught by such a childish ploy. Naraku squared his shoulders. He disconnected the second call and waited for Inuyasha to switch over.

"Well, Mr. West I sincerely hope you feel better. I'll send someone over during lunch break to deliver your missing work." He hung up before Inuyasha could muster a reply.

"Oh Kanna, I have another job for you."

"Damn him," Inuyasha cursed. Now he had both Sess and some lackey of the principal's coming over to "check" on him. Well, time for phase three: building the proper booby traps. He ran to the basement to retrieve fishing wire, weights, and other useful objects.

Inuyasha had just rigged his doorknob when he heard the unmistakable roar of a restored corvette. He leaned out the hall window.

"Hey idiot, park it in the garage-you want the neighbors getting ideas?" He ran down to let Miroku in. "Did you bring it?"

"I brought it." Miroku a gleam in his eye as he held up a tape.

Inuyasha stuck the tape into the editing machine and worked his magic. The tape was the product of Miroku's hard labor all last summer. He had followed Sango's dad and Kagome's mom around, taping various things. After the proper editing and re-mastering, they would have the girl's parental permission to leave early for (separate of course) dental and doctoral appointments.

The plan worked without a hitch. Mr. Naraku's secretary promised to send word to both girls that their parents were going to come pick them up in twenty minutes.

"Well, Miroku, how do I look?" Inuyasha was decked out in his fancy Italian blood red sweater and matching jeans. He was the only guy who could get away with dressing that way and not be thought of as gay. And he had waist length hair to boot! But girls went crazy over his looks, so he had it easy.

Miroku rolled his eyes. "You look like you."

"Thanks." Inuyasha doubled checked all his trappings, and together he and Miroku made their way out of the West garage and onwards to their school.

Sango and Kagome waited by the side entrance, the farthest they could get from school without actually leaving the grounds. Kagome kept shifting her feet; she was nervous, Sango could tell, since she rarely ditched school.

"Don't worry, Kagome-chan, they'll be here, or I'll skin Miroku alive."

They were rewarded with the sound of squealing tires and the smell of burning rubber.

"Ugh, Inuyasha's driving." Kagome gulped.

The corvette coasted to a stop, almost running the girls over.

Miroku held open the passenger door, "My ladies, your chariot is here."

"Methinks the gentleman is too fulleth of himself," Sango remarked to Kagome. Once the girls were settled (or as settled as one could be perched on the back of the car, with the top down), Inuyasha sped away.

Unbeknownst to all four companions, a feminine shadow watched them depart. Kikyou stepped out from her hiding place and frowned deeply. There was no way she was letting her Inuyasha go anywhere without her, let alone with that girl, Kagome. Everyone foolishly thought they two looked alike, but she couldn't see it.

Looking around, she didn't see anyone, so she ran across the parking lot and jumped into her car, determined to follow him, even to the ends of the earth if necessary.

Sesshoumaru had seen Kikyou depart. He wasn't pleased. It wouldn't do for this girl to catch his brother red-handed, when it was clearly his, Sesshoumaru's, privilege to do so. He wouldn't let that idiot Kouga find Inuyasha either; he would find some way to leave him stranded along the road. As for Kagura . .well, she wasn't so bad. He looked at his watch. In two hours he would go "check" on Inuyasha, ditch Kouga, and go seek the little miscreant out himself.

He smiled cruelly. Well laid plans.

ACT II

"Whoo hoo!" Miroku yelled, throwing back his head. "I love the open road!" Inuyasha grinned wildly and barely avoided a truck in the lane ahead of them. The girls shrieked.

"How are you ladies doing back there?" Miroku questioned.

Kagome was clutching Sango, who was covering her head with her hands. "Just peachy, thanks. Now slow down, you psycho!"

Finally taking the exit, Inuyasha slowed down as he entered the city. He drove around, looking for a parking space.

"You are not leaving this car outside, my dad would know."

"Fine," Inuyasha sighed, and drove about some more. Finding a respectable looking parking garage he pulled in. He paid the attendant extra just in case. Miroku kept stealing a glance back at the car as the group walked out.

"Okay, first things first, we need to hit the stadium." Miroku looked happy but the girls seemed annoyed. "And of course, later, some of the finest shopping and dining," Inuyasha smoothly added. Sango appeared mollified, and Kagome smiled at Inuyasha in a way that made his heart rate speed up.

"Okay, first things first, we'll check the house, just to make sure he's not there and to uncover evidence that he left and whatnot." Sesshoumaru was directing his odd crew as he drove home. The trio had left right after second period, before lunch, so that Inuyasha would be caught by surprise.

Sesshoumaru parked quietly down the back driveway and motioned for the others to follow quietly. He snuck in through the back door and silently climbed the stairs. Kagura was to guard the front door and Kouga the side entrance.

Upstairs, Sesshoumaru listened at the door. He couldn't hear anything, so he silently creaked it open.

Kagura and Kouga came running at the sound of Sesshoumaru's scream. Rounding the second story landing, Kagura gasped. She stopped so fast that Kouga smashed into her and fell halfway down the stairs just the way he had come up.

Sesshoumaru's beautiful hair was soaking wet as were his designer clothes. A water bucket lay at his feet. He kept sputtering and opening and closing his mouth, but no sound came out. Kagura, who had always been enamored of Sesshoumaru's cool head and graceful appearance, was devastated. She looked towards Inuyasha's door, still only ajar.

Suddenly, Kouga came rushing back up, steaming mad. He ran at the door full force and slammed it all the way open. In a flash, Sesshoumaru had pulled Kagura out of the way, as Kouga and the banister behind him were splashed with dark blue dye.

Kouga backed up and crashed into the railing, clawing at his face.

"You moron, get some water on it!" Despite the mess, Sesshoumaru reached over and dragged Kouga into the bathroom, and turning on the shower, shoved him in. Blue water rushed all over the floor.

"What a bother," Sesshoumaru grumbled, walking out to peer into his brother's room. Sure enough, the bed was empty. "I knew it," he spat. He turned to Kagura. "Go make sure the little brat isn't hiding somewhere in the house, laughing at us. I'll take care of him," he pointed to the bathroom where muffled cries could be heard.

Kagura headed downstairs.

Across town, as the boys cheered for their team, a beep alerted Inuyasha to his PDA.

"Looks like Alpha one and two have been deployed."

"Huh?"

"The main traps at my door just went off within seconds of each other. I doubt he'd be that stupid, so there must be someone else there." Inuyasha pondered for a moment. "I bet it's that idiot Kouga-he hates my guts, don't know why, and he's stupid as hell. I bet Sesshoumaru brought him along to go through the traps first. Poor bastard." He snickered and Miroku joined in.

Sango rolled her eyes. "Do you have to go to such extremes?"

"Of course, this is my brother we're talking about."

"That's true," Kagome murmured.

Back in sunny suburbia, a car discreetly pulled up outside the West residence.

"Alright, Kanna, I want you to simply ring the bell. If he doesn't answer or come down, go around to the back and check it out."

The girl nodded skeptically and got out. Ringing the bell brought nothing, so she hesitantly went out back as instructed. She pressed the basement door, and to her surprise, it opened. She stepped into the house, not sure what to do.

"Inuyasha?" She called out tentatively. She felt utterly stupid. What would one of the most popular guys in school be doing hiding in his basement from her?

Kagura made her way down the basement steps. There were long and unlighted, and she felt herself grabbing the walls every now and then for support and reassurance.

Damn that Sesshoumaru! She angrily thought. We could have spent this day together, ignoring the world, but instead I'm searching for his obviously MIA brother while he doctors the village idiot. Next he'll ask me to scour the bathroom floor like a scullery maid.

"Oh Kagura, you have to do it; as a man, I have no skills in cleaning!" She mocked his voice as she finally reached the last step. Then she noticed the door was open and light was streaming in. Maybe he had gone out this way after all? Nobody had been watching.

Meanwhile, Naraku had become impatient. He was sick of rich kids like Inuyasha getting away with everything, and was even more upset that the seemingly perfect student Kanna Helena had not retrieved him. Couldn't anyone be trusted these days?

He got out of the car himself and circled the house. Noting the open basement door, he headed towards it.

Kagura walked over to the doorway and looked out. She came face to face with a man. She screamed three shades of bloody murder.

"An intruder!" She slammed the door in his face, catching his tie in the process. She bolted the door and ran toward the stairs. She smacked into another figure.

"Another intruder!" She shrieked and shoved the other person away from her and ran up the stairs, two at a time. "Sesshoumaru! Save me!"

Hearing her cries, Sesshoumaru let Kouga fall face first into the shower door as he ran down to Kagura. He reached the kitchen as Kagura did. She launched herself at him, burying her face into his chest.

"It was horrible, two intruders!"

Sesshoumaru sat her at the table and grabbed a fire poker from the fireplace. He advanced down stairs. He walked around, trying to flush out who ever was in the basement. Kanna, feeling dizzy from being shoved, stood up shakily; not recognizing Sesshoumaru with his hair plastered every which way, and his arms stained blue, mistook him for the "intruder" she had heard someone yelling about. Grabbing a sleeping bag, she unrolled it and threw it over him.

The figure cloaked in the smiley-faced sleeping bag dropped the fire poker on his foot and danced about the room, toppling biking equipment as he desperately tired to make sense of the dark and polyester world he had been thrown into. Kanna used the confusion to run up the stairs to what she hoped was freedom.

Kagome flipped through a rack of way-too-expensive dresses as Sango oohed and ahhed.

"So you think Kouga's his accomplice?"

Inuyasha snorted. "He's probably just using him, like I said earlier. Besides, they'll never find us. I have all the calls to the house being forwarded to my cell phone so I definitely won't miss a call-it'll look like I've been in bed all day. I just need to be home before everyone else."

A few feet away, hidden behind a rack of designer sunglasses was Kikyou. She was trying to find a way to draw Inuyasha away from the rest of his group. She picked up a pair of sunglasses.

This should work, she mused. She dropped them, making sure the boys saw. "Oops," she said, pretending to be dismayed. Miroku jauntily walked over, grinning.

"Oh, Miss, are these yours?"

"Not you, fool!" she snapped, pushing Miroku and sending him sailing into Sango from behind.

"Argh, Miroku! Keep your hands to yourself!" She slapped him upside the head for his trouble. Kagome tried to cover up her giggle.

Miroku limped over to Inuyasha. "I don't get women today."

But Inuyasha was staring at the girl who had once again hidden herself among the shades. "Doesn't she look like . . ?"

"Kagome? Yeah sort of."

"No, no, I mean Kikyou. I mean her hair looks longer now, but I think it was her."

"Uh-oh."

"You're telling me. I didn't know she was back so early from her study abroad program. Let's get the girls and get out of here!"

"Hey ladies, how about we lunch now?"

"But we haven't bought anything yet!" Sango despaired.

"Hey, it's my treat if we leave now."

Sango looked at Kagome and both girls nodded. Free lunch was still possible after all.

Inuyasha herded his friends out of the store before Kikyou realized it was him. Little did he know he was what she had come for.

Naraku came to slowly as the dizziness and headache subsided. He was supported by his tie, which was still caught in the door. He glared and pulled with all his might, but he had no luck freeing himself. Both ends were caught in the door, so he couldn't simply undo it and walk away. He cursed his wretched situation. Where was that Kanna?

Kanna burst through the kitchen entrance and skidded to a stop, trying to determine where to go next. She caught sight of Kagura.

"Onee-sama!"

Kagura dropped the frying pan she was holding up as a makeshift weapon and ran to her sister and embraced her.

"Kanna? What are you doing here?"

"There's an intruder down there!"

"What? Oh no! Sesshoumaru went down there a while ago!"

"I didn't see him there."

Kagura looked panicked. "Sesshoumaru, hold on! I'm coming to save you!" She picked up an even larger frying pan, but before she could get to the door, a figure wearing a sleeping bag tripped into the kitchen. Kagura threw the frying pan, grabbed Kanna's hand and pulled them both up the stairs.

By this point, Kouga had managed to suds up his blue hair. He had added shampoo, conditioner, toner, bath bubbles, and as many other facial products as he could find in the bathroom closet. The bubbles shone with a pale blue glow, and stood off of his head like an out of control afro. Hearing running steps, he poked his head out into the hallway.

Catching sight of the horrid creature that seemed so alike to the one in the basement, Kanna screamed.

"It's the same guy from below! He beat us up here!"

"What?" Kagura gasped. In her fear she didn't even stop to observe Kouga. She simply shoved him as hard as she could into the bathroom, slammed the door, and pulled Kanna down the hall, locking them into a large study.

Kouga's feet where slippery with bubbles, so he sailed clear across the bathroom and fell halfway out of the window. He tried to scrabble back up, but he only managed to lose what little footing he had. With a girly shriek, he slid down the roof and into a nearby tree, landing with a thud on a tree branch.

"What are we going to do?" Kanna wailed. Kagura looked around the office in hopes of finding a solution. She spotted a phone.

"Hello? Is this the police station? There are possibly two or more intruders in the house." She hung up and turned to her sister. "That should fix things."

"And Principal Naraku is waiting for me, too! But we're trapped in the house!"

Kagura's eyes widened. "Oh my god, you mean he's here?"

"Outside in his car."

Kagura angled her head to see out of the window, but she couldn't see all of the street. "Oh no, if he finds out we're all here, we'll get detention for skipping for sure!"

"Who's `we'?" Kanna questioned.

"Oh, that's Kouga and Sesshoumaru."

Kanna wrinkled her brow. "Well, now that you mention it, the person downstairs did sort of look like a really, really bad version of Sesshoumaru. And the other guy could have been Kouga. Did he recently grow an afro and dye it blue?"

Kagura crumpled to the floor. "Oh, you must be right!" She groaned. Suddenly she jumped up in horror. "Oh, no! I might have killed him with that frying pan!" She ran out the door.

"I'm pretty sure the sleeping bag absorbed most of his fall!" Kanna called after her sister's retreating form.

After securing the best table in the house, Inuyasha and Miroku talked quietly amongst themselves as the girls went to the restroom together.

"This is bad. Your psycho ex is hunting you."

"Hey, you don't know that! She may just have shown up here."

Miroku just gave him a look. Inuyasha sighed, defeated.

"This day was supposed to be stress free, not full of Sess and Kouga and Kikyou!"

"And we're getting nowhere with the girls," Miroku sighed.

It was Inuyasha's turn to give him a look. "I don't know where you think you're going to get with Sango, unless you count being throw out of a second story window."

"Hey! You promised you'd never bring that up again! Besides, where do you think you'll end up, if Kagome finds out about Kikyou."

"Finds out what? She knows we went out a long time ago."

"Yeah, but she doesn't know how obsessed Kikyou is with you. Remember, Kagome said she hates getting involved with guys who still have baggage from a previous relationship."

"Kikyou isn't baggage! She's more like knickknacks you can't get rid of, even in a yard sale." Inuyasha sighed again, shifting in his seat. He spied the girls coming back over to the table. He leaned close to Miroku. "I'll just have to stay away from her, how hard can it be?" Miroku looked skeptical, but the four began to order.

Sitting in the study, Kanna heard muffled cries for help. She figured she'd done more harm than good, so she decided against doing anything.

And so Kouga remained in his tree for a little while longer.

In the basement, Kagura was cradling a rumpled sleeping bag, although she couldn't figure out which end was Sesshoumaru's head. "Are you alive?" She asked tentatively.

"I'm fine," came his reply in his usual cool voice, although it was rather jagged around the edges. He stood up, not allowing Kagura to help him. He flung the sleeping bag off and attempted to smooth down his hair and clothes. Kagura started babbling apologies, and ran about, clearing up the mess. Sesshoumaru strode across the room and back again, secretly testing his ability to walk in a straight line. Good, he thought, no internal injuries.

Outside, Naraku had seen a flash of white in the window. Inuyasha, he smiled, so you are hiding from me. You must not be so ill then, if you can find the strength to imprison your principal, and then sit and laugh! Naraku got angrier and angrier, until finally he managed to tear one side of the tie out of the doorjamb.

Sesshoumaru chose this moment to open the door to look for the intruder Kagura had seen. The door swung into Naraku and sent him free-falling to the side. Seeing nothing, Sesshoumaru closed the door. He and Kagura walked upstairs just as the first far-off cries of sirens could be heard.

Inuyasha had just taken a bite of steak when he started choking. Behind Kagome's shoulder he saw Toutousai and Myouga sitting at the bar.

Kagome looked concerned. "Are you okay, Inuyasha?"

He smiled and nodded. It appeared as though his guardians had not yet seen his group. When Kagome bent down to take another scoop of her salad, Inuyasha motioned for Miroku to look behind her. But Miroku looked horrified for a different reason and pointed past Sango's shoulder. Inuyasha turned slowly to look, and promptly choked again.

Behind Sango, a few tables away, sat Kikyou, disguised in a hat and long gloves. She sipped some lemonade from a long straw and smiled seductively at Inuyasha.

"Are you sure you're alright, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked.

"You know, the smoke in here is bothering me a bit, too," Sango added.

Miroku took advantage of the situation. "Why don't we go someplace else for dessert then?"

"An excellent idea," Inuyasha nodded.

"Oh, where will we go?" Kagome smiled expectantly. Inuyasha noted Kikyou also watching him warily.

"It's a surprise," he smiled nervously.

Phase five, Inuyasha thought glumly: escape past guardians unnoticed. Escape Kikyou's clutches. Find surprise dessert place.

Naraku had landed into a large mud puddle. His suit was soaked through, and smelled moldy. Cursing, he looked around for his car keys, preparing to go home and change before he went to school and had Inuyasha A. West suspended for life, but to his horror, he couldn't find them. Bending down, he started searching the mud puddle.

Kouga was relieved to see that the police were on their way over. Perhaps a fire truck would also arrive, to pull him from the tree. He really waited in vain.

"What's that noise?" Sesshoumaru, still unsure if he didn't sustain some head injury, wanted to make sure that the sirens he heard were real.

"Oh, no! I completely forgot I called the police to have you and Kouga arrested!"

"What?"

"I mean, when I thought you were the intruders."

Kanna came downstairs. "Should I go ask the principal to speak to the police? Maybe an authority figure would be able to explain all of this better."

Sesshoumaru looked tired.

After leading everybody around in circles in hopes of losing Kikyou, Inuyasha finally stopped at an ice cream parlor.

"Inuyasha, we passed this place three times already. Didn't you notice?" Kagome questioned. Sango gave him an irritated look.

"Uh, sorry, must be my bad sense of direction acting up again." He laughed weakly.

"Smooth," Miroku quipped.

"I don't see you and Sango eating out of the same dish, Miroku." Inuyasha taunted.

Miroku narrowed his eyes, but finally gave it up. He looked wistfully at Sango who was currently with Kagome at the toppings bar, spooning on hot chocolate. He tore his eyes away and turned to his mis-directed friend. "So we lost Kikyou, but what about Kouga? He'll probably be waiting to bust you, if your brother isn't."

Inuyasha frowned. "Kouga isn't known to be reliable, so it's possible the administration won't believe him over me. Plus we managed to avoid my guardians and Kikyou. My idiot brother and Kouga shouldn't pose a problem. Like I said before, I just need to make it home before either Sesshoumaru or Toutousai does. Sess has kendo practice till five, so we have till then."

"Yeah, I need to be back before five too. That's when my dad comes home, and the car needs to be all shiny and in place."

The girls walked over, licking their spoons.

"Talking about the car again?" Sango smirked.

"Really, don't you boys have any other interests?" Kagome agreed.

"Well, speaking of wheels, how about a different kind? You girls up for roller-skating in the park?" Miroku had a twinkle in his eye that Inuyasha didn't like.

:"Sure," Sango had a similar twinkle, "you think you can keep up?"

"Oh, you're on Davis! Race you there!" Miroku ran off towards the roller blade rental stand.

"Not so fast, Monk!" Sango shrieked and ran after him.

Inuyasha offered Kagome his arm, and she accepted. They calmly walked over to join their friends.

Kagome on my arm, and no sign of Kikyou. Life is good, thought Inuyasha.

Poor fool.

Naraku dug and dug but couldn't find his keys. When he heard sirens, he really started to worry. Some neighbor probably called claiming I was trying to break in, he thought, or maybe it was Inuyasha. The principal was boiling with anger by this point. Damn that Inuyasha! He was dripping mud everywhere, wondering where to go when he tried opening the basement door again.

Amazingly, it opened. It's like these people are asking for their house to be broken into, Naraku thought. He went in and looked around for a towel or a blanket to rub off some of the mud. Noticing something white and furry poking out of a box, he went to investigate.

Sesshoumaru went to the door as policemen surrounded the premises.

"Officers," he called out, "there's no need for that. Please let me explain."

"We got a distress call."

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily. He was covered in blue dye. Kagura was freaked out. Kouga was missing. The principal was here. The police were here. He was covered in blue dye. Blue dye! And it was all Inuyasha's fault.

"Oh, Officer, it's all my fault," Kagura smoothly cut in. "You see, we're involved in a special school project, and we were just putting the finishing touches on it when I thought I saw someone in the basement. But Sesshoumaru checked it out and it's safe, so I'm afraid it was a false alarm." She smiled brightly.

"Help me! I've fallen into a bird's nest and the mother bird is trying to peck my eyes out!"

The police officers blinked. "What was that?" One of them inquired.

"Uh, special sound effects for our project. It's about man's inability to conquer nature," Kagura improvised. The officers nodded hesitantly.

"Hey, I see some footprints out back," one of them called.

The chief of police turned to Sesshoumaru. "Sir, in your best interest, we'd best take a look-see." He walked off to join his men.

"I'm going to kill my little brother," Sesshoumaru hissed.

"Um, Sess, maybe you shouldn't say that with the entire precinct here," Kagura bit her lip.

Sesshoumaru turned to her. "Hey, quick thinking back there. Thanks." She blushed a deep shade of red. Kanna smiled a knowing smile.

Naraku felt beyond ridiculous. He stood in the basement wearing a baboon costume. He had to stop and wonder which unfortunate individual was forced to wear this on Halloween, or a masquerade ball, or whatever. He looked out the window to make sure no one was around. Not seeing anything he finally stepped out.

"Freeze!"

Looking around, Principal Naraku saw a police officer holding his gun. Great, they're still here, he realized. Knowing they couldn't see his face, he decided to try and make a run for it.

He ran down the block and out onto a larger road. A few police cruisers were now on his tail as well, so he cut into the woods and ran through. On the other side he saw a subway station. Dashing into the kiosk he ran past the startled attendant and made it onto a train, which took off.

Safe for now, he thought.

Kagome screamed happily as Inuyasha grabbed her around the middle and spun her around, her skates leaving the ground. They had skated through the park twice already.

Miroku noticed his two friend's moves and tried it out on Sango. He almost toppled them both into a fountain.

"Miroku! Watch where you're going!" She yelled warningly.

"I'm sorry Sango, it's just that when you're around, I can't see anything else."

Sango tried to look stern but a small smile tugged at her lips.

"I'll race you to the lakeshore!" Miroku yelled, taking off.

"Hey, no fair!" Sango shouted, in hot pursuit.

"Those two," Kagome giggled, looking up at Inuyasha.

"Having a good time?" He queried, cocking his head to the side allowing sunlight to catch in his eyes, setting off their golden hue.

"Absolutely."

Suddenly a blur smashed into Inuyasha, completely throwing him off balance. He, Kagome, and the unidentified blur crashed unceremoniously to the ground.

"Ow," Kagome grumbled.

"Oh, Inuyasha! You saved me!" A shrill female voice cried. The tall slender girl threw her arms around Inuyasha's neck and clung to him. Her long raven hair got hopelessly tangled in Inuyasha's snow-white locks.

"Hey! Get off me Kikyou!"

Kagome looked disturbed. "You know her?"

"Of course, Inuyasha is my protector! My savior! And my love." Kikyou rested her chin on Inuyasha's chest while he tried to fend her off.

"That's not how it goes at all! We used to date a long time ago, and she isn't my love!" Inuyasha protested, finally managing to stand up. Kagome looked skeptical; this girl seemed so mature and refined. She and Inuyasha made such a handsome couple-perhaps they really were together. Was he simply stringing her along?

Kikyou decided to take the lost-little-hurt-girl approach. She sniffled. "Oh, Inuyasha, do you really mean that? I thought you cared."

"I-Hey-don't cry," he trailed off.

Kikyou smiled secretly. She knew his weakness was a girl's tears. Kagome seemed confused and hurt.

"Inuyasha, you owe me an explanation! And you owe her one, too!" Kagome gave him a hard look. He gulped.

"Look, Kagome, Kikyou and I were young back then and it was just a flingy-type of romance." Kagome did not seem impressed. Inuyasha started anew, "I mean we were very different. We wanted different things, so we went our separate ways. But Kikyou . . kind of came around again. The truth is Kikyou," Inuyasha turned to her, "is that I want the same things Kagome does, so I think it's best if you and I just stay friends."

Kagome smiled, feeling as if all the world's light and joy had just entered her body. He wants the same things I do, she mused, marveling at how mature he was being.

"Oh, Inuyasha," she purred, much like Kikyou just had. She stepped into him and planted a sweet kiss on his startled lips.

Kikyou's eyes widened in shock. Who did this girl think she was? Angrily, she walked over and dragged Kagome away by her hair. Kagome shrieked and Inuyasha blinked, trying to recover his scattered wits.

"Listen up, hussy," Kikyou angrily said, "stay away from my-"

But she was cut off as a large rolling mass of arms and legs swept up the two fighting girls and deposited the entire jumbled pile into the fountain. Inuyasha remained blinking as a huge tidal wave engulfed him.

Finally coming to his senses, or at least most of them, he glimpsed struggling movement under the surface of the water. It seemed the people underneath were fighting to see who would reach the surface first. At this rate, they would all drown. Inuyasha reached in and experimentally felt around. Finding someone's head, he pulled it up.

Miroku gasped and sputtered for air. Inuyasha removed his hand from Miroku's dragon-tail. "You saved me!" Miroku shrieked with rapture, happy to taste air again.

Inuyasha raised an eyebrow, "What about the others?" Miroku's eyes widened and he dove down to recover Sango, Kagome, and even Kikyou, who gave him a good slap for his efforts. Miroku went back under and Sango retrieved him, giving Kikyou a dirty look.

Inuyasha thought this was the strangest day he'd lived, and that it couldn't get any stranger, but to prove him wrong a man wearing a baboon pelt ran past and threw himself into some bushes.

Inuyasha decided it was time to head home.

"Come on guys, it's past four-we should hit the highway before our parents get home.

"I can't go home looking like this!" Sango wailed.

"And nobody's getting into my dad's corvette all sopping wet, either!" Miroku added.

"Do you see a towel stand anywhere?" Inuyasha demanded. "We'll have to make the best of it. I'm the least wet, so I'll go get the car while you guys attempt to get dry." He took off running, leaving a fuming Kikyou and Kagome, and a nervous Miroku and Sango. Would the fighting begin anew? They waited, breathlessly.

"You man-stealer!" Kikyou shrieked. And the two girls went at it.

ACT III

Sesshoumaru sat rigidly behind the wheel of his car, tense and angry, although neither emotion showed. Kagura nervously glanced at him from the corners of her eyes every now and then. Kanna sat immobile in the back, squished in the small backseat the car provided.

"Are you sure you can locate him using GSP? He may have blocked his PDA from the satellite signals knowing you would try it." Kagura quietly announced.

Sesshoumaru gritted his teeth. "I'll find him anyway. I'll check all the hot spots he likes to visit. His mind is simple enough, afterall."

Kanna spotted a fast-moving car moving in the opposite direction. The occupants of the car looked familiar. "Oh! There went Inuyasha in Miroku Monk's car!" She cried out.

Sesshoumaru checked the rearview mirror, and lo there was his annoying brother speeding down the highway in his friend's dad's corvette. This would not do.

Sesshoumaru turned sharply across six lanes of highway, with Kagura and Kanna screaming the entire time, in his now desperate attempt to catch his brother.

As the sun sank a bit closer to the horizon, a corvette drove North, followed by Sesshoumaru's small coupe, and behind him, Kikyou in her sedan and finally, unknown to all the students, Principal Naraku who had hired a taxi.

Toutousai and Myouga, finished with the day's business, also got into their car and took off towards home.

Kouga sighed heavily in his tree.

It seemed that everyone was about to meet up, at long last. But remember, Inuyasha was born under a lucky star. A star that always seemed to look out for him.

Inuyasha happened to glance into the rearview mirror and spotted his brother's car a few car lengths behind them. So, he had blown off school too, eh? Pretty hypocritical of him to complain about Inuyasha's truancy when he had done the same. So Inuyasha figured he didn't have all that much to worry about. But he didn't like the happy expression on Sesshoumaru's face as he caught up to his younger sibling.

"Uh-oh," Miroku murmured as Sesshoumaru finally pulled up next to the corvette, doing a graceful 75 miles per hour.

"Hello, little brother. I was getting worried about you, since you weren't at home during lunch."

"Well, you came too early to check on me. According to my alarms, you entered my room far before it was your lunch break. How sweet, Sess, really, I didn't know you cared so deeply." Inuyasha shot back at him. He did a double take, surprised to see Kagura in the passenger seat. Usually Sesshoumaru did not like the presence of anyone around when he did his work, which primarily consisted of trying to ruin Inuyasha's life.

"I'm sure Toutousai will be anxious to hear how you spent your day, as would our twisted principal-he too stopped by to see how you were." Sesshoumaru smiled nastily.

"Well I'm sure seeing you instead made up for it!" Inuyasha yelled back, almost hitting a truck.

"He didn't see me; besides I'm a senior and have a perfect attendance record. You on the other hand, are a problem to the school, which they well understand. I think with my recommendation the administrators will see it fit to have you expelled."

Inuyasha began to fume. "You can get me expelled from school, but no matter how hard you try, Sess, you won't get me expelled from the family! I guess I'll always be that little thorn in your side!"

The speed of the cars were approaching 90mph, and a local highway cruiser spotted them and followed, sirens blaring.

"Oh, that'll make the second police encounter of the day," Kagura sighed to herself.

Inuyasha quickly took the exit for Sango's street, but Sesshoumaru kept driving straight, and eventually had to pull over.

Shooting through suburbia like a rocket, Inuyasha glanced at his watch. With Sesshoumaru receiving a speeding ticket, with enough luck, Inuyasha could drop off everybody and still make it home. Or maybe not.

He pulled over drastically in front of Sango's house. "All right you guys, I'm running out of time, so why don't you all get out here?"

"But what about the car?" Miroku nervously questioned. "My dad will be back soon!"

"Forget the car, I want to see how this will all turn out," Sango laughed. Kagome had to agree. The girls were in a better mood since they had dried out some. Kagome was still elated over Inuyasha's little speech.

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Fine, just tell my guardians you came by to visit me." He took off again, weaving through the neighborhood with practiced skill. He realized he was approaching Kikyou's house. Looking at the driveway as he passed, he noticed her car wasn't there. Not good. With dread he peaked into the rearview mirror. Sure enough, Kikyou was right behind. He was beginning to wonder who was the bigger pain: Kikyou or Sesshoumaru, when he noticed that a certain taxi had also been following them. Or was it just his imagination?

"Oh, Toutousai, aren't we out of bread?" Myouga inquired, spotting a mini-mart.

"Hmm, you're right. Why don't we stop quickly." He pulled the car over.

The two older men got out of the car and entered the store just as a red corvette, a sedan, and a taxi went rushing by.

Kouga was half-in and half-out of consciousness when he felt a small tap against his forehead. He slowly opened his eyes as he felt another tap, this one harder. He then realized that someone was throwing pebbles at him. Looking over the tree branch to the ground below, he spotted a kid he knew in the neighborhood.

"Shippou!" He cried gladly. "Hey, can you get me a ladder?"

The ten-year-old looked at him skeptically. "Why should I? I'm not your slave. Why don't you get it yourself?"

"Because I'm stuck in this goddamn tree, that's why!"

Shippou stuck his tongue out and began to walk away.

"Wait, you dumb little brat! I'll give you some candy if you help me!"

The child stopped to consider. "What kind of candy?"

"Any kind you want!"

"OK, let me see it."

"I don't have it now, you dolt! Just get me a ladder first."

"I'm not a dolt! What's a dolt?"

And the argument continued.

Sesshoumaru had finally convinced the stupid police officer that he had learned his lesson and would never, ever speed again. Damn that Inuyasha! He was probably safely at home. But perhaps not-it all depended if he dropped off his friends first.

Putting the pedal to the floor of the car, Sesshoumaru zoomed off again, ignoring Kagura and Kanna's pleas to slow down. The game wasn't over yet.

When Naraku saw the woods come up, he signaled for the driver to let him off. He ran through the same short cut he had taken that morning, and arrived on foot at the West residence amazingly before anyone else. He crept into the basement again and silently made his way up the stairs. He waited by the kitchen entrance, hoping to catch Inuyasha returning home.

Inuyasha instructed Miroku to take the car to the other street in back of the house and wait. Inuyasha himself ran through a bunch of his neighbor's yards to get into his house from behind. He saw that the basement door was ajar. He slowed down and thought for a moment. He then ran around to the shed.

Sesshoumaru screeched to a halt outside his house and ran as fast as he could into the foyer, through the parlor, past the dining room, and into the kitchen. He was about to run down to the basement and lock it so that Inuyasha couldn't return that way, when a baboon leapt out and tried to tackle him. He adeptly got out of the way of the attack and threw the figure against the opposite wall. The baboon groaned.

"Curse you, Inuyasha . . " it trailed off. Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes dangerously. If it was one thing he hated more than having Inuyasha get away with everything, it was being mistaken for Inuyasha himself. He advanced on the figure, determined to end its sad life.

Kikyou tore through the woods like a mad woman, determined to find Inuyasha and remind him of what they had had. Bursting out of the backyard hedges, she saw the basement door was open and figured Inuyasha had gone in by those means. But then she heard something around the side of the house. Walking over to investigate, she saw that Inuyasha was halfway up a ladder that was leaning against the side of the house.

She ran over and grabbed the base. "Inuyasha! Wait! I have to tell you something!"

Inuyasha looked down, horrified. Not only did it appear that Sess had set a trap for him in the basement, but now Kikyou was harassing him, threatening to throw him from his perch.

"Not now, Kikyou! Please, I told you we should remain friends! Why don't you come back in a few days?" He desperately tried to shake her off the ladder; she had already claimed to the first few rungs.

"But Inuyasha, this can't wait!" Kikyou continued to climb, like a rising flame. Inuyasha whimpered and climbed faster.

His goal was to get to the roof, walk across the house and then climb down to reach his bedroom window, or the hall window. His room faced away from the street, so hopefully no one would notice him, especially his guardians if they happened to drive up.

Sesshoumaru advanced on the figure. Naraku sat up, dizzy and very angry. He focused on Sesshoumaru's face.

"Oh, I see it is the elder West sibling. If you'd be so kind as to hand over your brother, I'll speak with your guardians and have him expelled immediately. Perhaps I'll even recommend a good military academy, hundreds of miles from here, eh?"

Sesshoumaru contemplated the offer.

"If you don't have any candy, then give me some money!"

"Does it look like I have a wallet on me, pipsqueak? I have hardened blue dyed conditioner, that's it! You want that?"

"You're dumb!"

"Get a ladder, Shippou!"

"I can't anyway, it's already in use."

Hope flared in Kouga's heart-was someone on the roof? If so, perhaps they could give him a hand. He turned his eyes on the roof and waited patiently for the first time that day.

Inuyasha was finally on the main roof. Balancing carefully he walked over to his side of the house. Maneuvering carefully, he let himself drop to the gable above his window and started to shimmy onto the sill. When he had the window open he stepped in. He was about to shut it again when a foamy blue mess came sailing at him, landing hard against the sill. The mess pulled itself into the room.

"Thanks man," Kouga gasped, walking over to Inuyasha's bed and collapsing. "You don't know how physically demanding it is to stay perched on a tree branch all day."

Inuyasha stared at the mess lying on his bed. "Kouga . . .?"

Meanwhile, Kikyou had not been as careful in maneuvering as Inuyasha had been, and had lost her balance on the edge of the gable. With a shriek she landed into the tree branch recently occupied by Kouga. She caught her breath and looked over towards Inuyasha's room. Was there someone else in there with him? It was that damn Kagome, she just knew it!

Inuyasha grabbed Kouga and dragged him off the bed. "I don't have time for this right now!" He yelled, as he flung Kouga out the window again and slammed it shut.

Well, it's back to the tree branch, I see, Kouga thought. Hm? What's this, someone's already there?

Kikyou's face grew whiter with horror as Kouga sporting his blue foam afro, by this point covered in leaves and twigs as well, sailed right at her. Sliding down the branch, Kouga smacked right against Kikyou who screamed and screamed.

Creaking, the tree branch finally gave way under all the weight and snapped loudly off the tree, sending its frazzled occupants to the ground.

"What was that noise?" Myouga asked.

Toutousai looked up as he locked the car. "Probably just the gardener taking off an old branch," he replied, as he lead the way into the house.

Sesshoumaru heard the key in the lock at the front door, and realizing his guardians were home already, he decided to deal with this situation fast.

"Mr. Naraku, didn't the police chase you out of our house once today already?" He walked over and opened the kitchen door. "Trust me, Principal Naraku, you don't want me chasing you out as well. So go now."

Naraku was in shock. He was defeated. If Sesshoumaru knew he had broken into their home, there was no way he could harm Inuyasha without bringing harm against himself.

Sesshoumaru slammed the door in his face.

"That was nice of you, Sess."

Sesshoumaru turned around to see Kagura standing in the doorway from the dining room.

"What was?" He gruffly asked.

"Saving your little brother." She smiled and walked over to lay her hand on his arm.

Sesshoumaru just shrugged. "It wasn't that, I just despise Naraku, and I'm not letting him dictate what happens in this family, especially when he entered my house illegally."

Kagura smiled tenderly. "Well, either way, you did save all of us from detention and possibly any further harassment from that jerk, so thanks." She leaned in and stood on her tiptoes to kiss him.

Inuyasha had just plopped on his bed as Toutousai and Myouga made their way inside.

"Are you feeling better, Inuyasha?" Myouga asked.

"You've some friends waiting to see you. May I let them in?"

"Sure," Inuyasha nodded. He was still tense inside, waiting for Sess's accusations to begin. The guardians made their way downstairs to see to other matters.

Miroku burst into the room, "Well, we did it, eh?"

"Wow," Sango said, "That was better than an amusement park. I've never been on such a ride before!"

Kagome came over to Inuyasha's bedside and sat down. "It looks like we had the perfect day after all, Mr. Social Director." She looked troubled for a moment. "So tell me Inuyasha, what about Kikyou?"

He smiled. "Didn't I tell you she was just a friend?" He pulled Kagome down to him.

Sango looked on wistfully. She turned her somewhat shrew eye on Miroku. "What about you, Monk-you have any `just friends'?"

He walked over to her. "Sure I do," he almost whispered, "and I'm looking at the best girlfriend and friend, just or not just, I could ever ask for." He leaned down to gently kiss her; Sango for once, was at a loss at what to say, which was pretty good for the current circumstances.

"Hey, you're down now, so can I have my candy and money?" Shippou inquired, poking a twitching Kouga.

Kouga groaned and sat up on his knees, observing the fallen girl beneath him. His eyes grew round. "You look just like Kagome! Are you her twin?"

Kikyou's eyes shut tightly against the pain. "I don't see the resemblance at all!"

"So, Inuyasha, do you think you'll be able to make it to school tomorrow? You seem very tired, still." Toutousai wondered later at dinnertime. He looked over at Sesshoumaru. "And you also look worn out, Sesshoumaru. Perhaps you should stay home tomorrow."

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru exchanged a glance that spoke volumes.

"Uh, it's okay," Inuyasha replied, "staying home from school is too much trouble."

"Yeah," Sesshoumaru agreed, "I'm looking forward to going tomorrow. It'll be like a vacation compared to today."

Toutousai simply shook his head. There was no understanding these kids today.

FIN

Inuyasha steps into the hallway and stares out at the readers. "What are you still doing here? The fanfic's over. Go read something else. Or, you can review if you'd like." He looks innocently at the review button. "Hey, it's just a suggestion." He smiles his million-dollar smile and walks off down the hall.