InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ The Crying Game ❯ Reflections ( Chapter 1 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

DISCLAIMER: Sadly, I do not own Inuyasha. I just like to play with them.

WARNINGS: Language and mature themes. Read responsibly.

The Crying Game

By: Lara Winner

Kagome gazed down on the crystalline water just a few feet below the overhanging rock where she knelt and gave into a small smile at the night's beauty. The black water reflected the pale moonlight across its serene surface like a mirror. Crawling closer to the edge of the rock the young girl stared down at her own image and sighed sadly.

Wide, weary gray eyes met Kagome's gaze holding a picture of hopelessness in their depths. Dark circles smudged her pale cheeks and her heart shaped lips were pressed in a thin line. Ebony hair spilled over her bare shoulders blending in with the dark waters. Kagome visibly winced as she sat back on her heals and looked up toward the night sky.

The moon shone brilliantly against the inky backdrop of space. The stars twinkled merrily, as if winking to the young miko that sat questioning herself and her desires in chilly darkness. Kagome closed her eyes and breathed deeply, taking in the clean crisp sent of the dense brush that surrounded her chosen water hole. Her newfound energy seemed to hum along her veins, tingle her muscles, and open her enhanced senses as the moonlight bathed her naked body in its healing beams.

A much needed calm settled over Kagome, forcing away her ache's and pains from the days journey. All the unaccounted for Shikon shards were in her possession. As if to comfort herself, Kagome idly caressed the jewel that hung on a sliver chain around her neck. The battles were over, Naraku was destroyed, revenge was claimed and her future was now secured by the shape of events here in the past. Only one thing troubled her greatly. The absence of a certain golden-eyed hanyou.

Kagome frowned, opening her eyes to once again look out onto the deep, calm pool. Inuyasha had not been seen for two days. His disappearing act was beginning to worry everyone, even Kaede. Miroku was proclaiming that Inuyasha was upset about Sessho-maru's uneasy alliance. Shippo was worried he was hurt. Sango wisely advised to simply give him time to confront whatever was weighing his mind.

Kagome was the only one not surprised by his actions. Perhaps it was her Miko powers or the way she and Inuyasha seemed to connect in an understanding that went beyond mere friendship, she wasn't sure, but for some unexplainable reason she knew why he was gone. Now that stone was in his possession Inuyasha was at a loss as to what to do next.

Kagome's heart ached for him.

All of his concentration for the past two years was focused on getting the Shikon stone. But his original malevolent intention was now no longer an option. Kagome knew that in his heart Inuyasha did not want to become a youkai just as he could not become human. The young man he had fought to become was finally beginning to realize that a hanyou was all he could ever be. There was no way he could become one or the other without leaving a major part of himself behind. Inuyasha had grown up in the last two years and while Kagome was proud of him, another part of her felt as if she had lost him.

Kagome breathed deeply as the tears that threatened to burned the back of her throat. Kikyo's memory was at the center of his decision, she was sure of it. It hurt immensely to know that he could not let her go, even in death. But she would not cry. It was always painful to leave the youthful heart behind and it was to this challenge that both she and Inuyasha had risen and survived. There would be no more tears, only a fond remembrance of yesterday and what could have been.

Chill-bumps spread along Kagome's skin as she rose to her feet. Action always purged her of thoughts and stepping to the edge of the rock, she lifted her arms and closing her eyes she let her self fall into the dark oblivion below.

******

Crouching in the darkness, Inuyasha watched as Kagome surfaced amidst the rippling water. For a moment she seemed to hug herself, her body trembling from the cold. Smiling wryly, the dog-demon shook his head. Only a fool would bathe in freezing water.

Inuyasha sighed, slumping back against the base of the tree and making himself comfortable. Knowing Kagome as he did, he was certain she would be occupied in the pool for quite a while enjoying the water. This bathing process was something she took very seriously and he could only assume the fixation was a female thing. Especially among human females. Because while he also liked to keep himself clean he could not, for any reason, tolerate water in his ears.

At the thought his ears twitched, then perked up as he strained to listen to the sudden sound of Kagome's voice as she swirled around in the water.

"First there are the kisses," she sang sweetly, her tone low and soothing, "then there are the sighs. And then before you know where you are, you're sayin' goodbye."

The sad words carried a haunting melody in the still air as Kagome wadded through the water. Inuyasha found he couldn't tear his gaze away and her voice seemed to strike a chord inside of him, sending just one of the many problems he'd been trying to sort out back into the forefront of his thoughts.

Kagome had no reason to stay any longer. Now that their quest was done there was nothing keeping her here, nothing more to bind her to him. Like every time he thought about it, once again he felt as if the air left his lungs at the realization of what would happen. Kagome would be gone. Never again would he hear her voice, smell the enticing sent that was uniquely her, feel her aura, or even touch her for any simple reason.

Where her presence was almost larger than life in his world, Kagome would eventually become a memory. Over time it would be the very things he missed about her that would evade him. And finally one day the images would be so distorted they wouldn't be worth remembering for he would no longer recall where his dreams ended and reality began.

In the end something precious would fade away to nothing…

Inuyasha growled low in his throat, snapping himself out of his melancholy. 'If the bitch is going to leave then why should I give a shit?' he asked himself. It wasn't as if she felt anything like *that* for him. Kagome, by nature, cared for everyone. But that still didn't mean she would ever consider him to be a respectable mate. Besides, the last human he'd chosen…

He refused to go there.

But the fact of the matter didn't change and Inuyasha sighed in exasperation. Kagome was different. She was like a fever in his blood. Somehow she had gotten under his skin and captivated him in a way that even Kikyo hadn't managed to do. The human in him adored her. The youkai in him wanted to possess her completely. And thus began an internal battle that never ceased. Did he see Kagome as an equal or a claimed toy? Did he want her as a lover or just his bitch?

A part of Inuyasha cringed at the blunt sentiments though he already knew the answer.