InuYasha Fan Fiction ❯ This Is Your Life ❯ Future ( Chapter 8 )

Part Seven: Future

Did you ever feel like you were just sitting waiting for your life to start?

I do.

My fifteenth birthday is in little less than a week, and in the almost fifteen years I've been alive I never really felt like I ever lived.

I know, I'm only fifteen, so how can I say I've never lived….in theory I haven't.

So I guess it's more like something is missing in my life, and I don't know what it is.

I guess I should start at the beginning.

My father died when I was six years old in a train crash coming home from work one evening. He left me, my mom, and my baby brother all alone.

I think that was the day I grew up.

We moved to the shrine with my grandfather. My dad was supposed to one day take over the shrine for grandpa, but since he's not here anymore I'm the one that has to carry on the family traditions.

Souta, my brother, wants to be a soccer player.

The feelings of incompleteness started right after we moved to the shrine. Mama thought it was just because I missed Daddy so much, and for a while I did too.

Until the dreams.

They were harmless at first. Lovely images of a beautiful forest, and countryside that you can't find in Japan anymore.

The thing I remember most is the most gorgeous shade of amber. I'm not sure what it is that has that color but it's beautiful. The dreams were like that for years. Occasionally I saw people, but never their faces or anything that could distinguish one from another. Over the last few years the dreams have been more intense.

I started to feel the emotions of the woman in my dreams. I was always a woman in my dreams. She always seemed so sad and lonely at times. Then at other times she was bitter and resentful. Like the world had done some great injustice to her and there was nothing she could do about it except brood.

I never understood her anger, and I think as a result of that I made it a point to always try to see the good in bad situations. I'm happy and cheerful because I know how it feels to be angry and lonely.

And I hated it.

So I put all my time and energy into school and my family, and for a while that's what kept me happy no matter what. But lately it feels like my life is missing something. The girls are always trying to get me to date someone; and while I like some of the boys that go to our school, they're just not for me. I mean there's something missing from them and I just can't quite put my finger on it. (AN: They're missing fluffy white puppy ears Kagome…)

Again I know, I can't say that my life is missing anything…I'm not even fifteen yet….still, I feel incomplete. Like there's something that only I'm supposed to do.

My dreams have changed lately, I forgot to mention that. Or I should say that the feelings have changed. The girl in my dream feels happy to an extent. There's still some sadness and maybe even some fear in her. I don't' know why she feels that way but she does. And I still see that gorgeous amber. It burns like a fire in my mind. So warm and pure; I feel safe when I see it in my dreams…but at the same time I feel like something bad is going to happen. It's like one of those bad horror movies where you know what's behind the door and you yell at the screen trying to tell the characters to run the other way and they don't. It's like that, and I don't know why. But I feel that something is going to go wrong and the happiness this girl feels is going to go away and that bright amber I see is going to burn out and fade away.

And when that all does then my life will start…

But that's not possible is it?

***

The night before Kagome's B-day, 1:34 am

Dear Diary,

My birthday is in exactly 48 minutes and I'm going to be fifteen. I should be sleeping because I have to go to school tomorrow. I know it stinks that I have school on my birthday, but there's nothing I can do about it.

Mama's gonna make oden, YUMMY!

Anyway, I can't sleep because I had another dream…actually it was more like a nightmare.

All I felt was pain.

It started out in the same field or meadow that my dreams always start in. The girl in my dream was incredibly happy about something, I'm not sure what, she was really happy that day for some reason.

Then the next thing I knew someone or something slashed her across her back and shoulder.

The scary thing was I felt it, like it was me that got attacked and hurt.

Then there was the fire. She/I was being burned and I heard something about the Shikon no Tama…

But that's just a legend right?

Mou, I gotta stop listening to grandpa's stories before bed….even if I wasn't listening….

Happy birthday to me. Something tells me that I'm not gonna ever forget this one.

Ja!

~Kagome

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A little bit about this part. My theory is that when reincarnated, you still share some of the same memories and feelings from your previous life. I mean that would make sense and would help form the person you are now. So why wouldn't Kagome see and feel some of the things Kikyo did?

It also give reason why when after she fell through the well she got out and started to look around. She on some subconscious level knew the place she was in because she had been there before in her dreams. And why she doesn't remember her dreams after her first trip through the well? Simple, now that her powers are awakened she doesn't need the memories anymore, but she feels things that seem familiar.

As to her feelings for Inu Yasha, those are hers and hers alone. She only remembers his eye color and sees nothing else about him, and she feels safe…

Maybe there was something more than just wanting to stay alive when she pulled out that arrow.

Next time: Part Eight: …To Live: The eventful first meeting and what happens when cranky hanyous wake up on the wrong side of the tree.

Ja.

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