Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction / Ah My Goddess Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction ❯ Why Sailor Pluto Hates The Bet ❯ Episode 10: A Choice of Fates ( Chapter 11 )

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Ranma 1/2: WHY SAILOR PLUTO HATES THE BET

by P.H. Wise

Episode 10: A Choice of Fates

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Disclaimer: Sailor Moon is the property of Takeuichi Naoko. Ranma belongs to Takahashi Rumiko. Evangelion belongs to Gainax. The Bet concept and the accompanying cast and background of Mimir's Well belong to Metroanime. Mimir's Well itself belongs to Mimir, who lives in Jotunheim under the roots of Yggdrasil. I don't own any of it, and I sincerely hope that my work of fanfiction has not offended any executives, lawyers, or guardians of the well of wisdom.

**********

"AKANE!" Ranma cried aloud, her voice full of dismay as the black rose petals left in the wake of Roseite and Akane's disappearance floated gently towards the ground. Ranma, Ukyou and Sailor Mars yet stood on the roof of Furinkan high school. The screams of madness from below had stopped, replaced now with senseless gibbering and fevered chanting.

Ranma, Ukyou, and Mars all exchanged glances.

"Well, now what do we do?" asked Ukyou.

Ranma clenched his fist. `We have to go to Rose-whatzits hideout and rescue Akane! Who knows what kind of torture they're going to put her through!"

Mars raised an eyebrow. "And how exactly did you plan on doing that, dummkopf? Look for the flashing neon sign that says `evil hideout?'"

"She has a point, Ranchan."

Mars smirked in a superior fashion. "We should head back to Central Dogma and check in with Luna and Artemis. They'll know what to do."

Ranma blinked, and Ukyou looked nonplussed. "Central dogma?" they asked in unison.

Sailor Mars nodded. "Central Dogma. We call it that because it pisses Artemis off. It's really called Central Control."

"I... see," said Ukyou, giving Mars a dubious glance.

"How `bout we go see the old ghoul instead?" asked Ranma, though it wasn't really a question as much as a statement. "She's pretty smart, and I ain't in no mood to be visiting the talkin' cats."

"The old ghoul?" asked Ukyou.

Sailor Mars frowned, and as the other two leapt down from the roof, signaled Luna and Artemis on her communicator before doing likewise.

********

In the nethermost caverns of the Dark Kingdom, beyond the fathoming of eyes that see, where dead thoughts live new and oddly bodied, and evil minds lurk that are not bound by flesh, a figure appeared in a swirl of black rose-petals: Roseite, general of the Dark Kingdom, and bearing Tuxedo Mallet in her arms. She laughed madly as she strode forth into the throne-room.

"My queen!" she exclaimed, placing Tuxedo Mallet on the floor before Queen Beryl's crystal ball, "I have captured one of the allies of the Sailor Senshi!"

"Have you indeed?" smirked Queen Beryl. Yes, smirked. As in, `communicated by means of smirking.' Somehow. ... don't ask. The dark queen of the equally Dark Kingdom rose to her full height as she looked down at the captive. For a long moment, she studied Tuxedo Mallet.

...

...

...

"Masaka," Queen Beryl breathed, scarcely able to believe her eyes.

"My Queen?" asked Roseite.

Beryl's smirk broke into a full-blown grin. "Do you have any idea who this is? Roseite, you have done VERY well. Give her a quick run through the spooky brainwashing machine and then have her sent to my quarters immediately! I will deal with her myself!" She turned and strode towards the doors to her quarters. "And don't delay!"

The courtiers exchanged nervous glances. When the Queen was in THIS kind of mood, it could mean only one thing: this was going to be ugly.

********

Sunlight streamed through the clouds, pinpoint spots of daylight illuminating a few dozen areas as large as a city block at most, and scarcely more than a handbreadth at the smallest. These patches of mid-day drifted lazily across the ward of Nerima, casting isolated areas into full daylight for the few brief seconds before the gloom of the overcast sky settled in once more, and even more oppressive for its brief absence. One such patch of drifting mid-day glided gently over the Neko-Hanten as Ranma, shielding her eyes against the sudden stab of light, related the day's events to Cologne. Ukyou and Asuka stood close at hand, looking at the withered old troll with no small amount of distrust in their eyes.

"I see," said Cologne as Ranma's tale drew to a close. Her expression grew thoughtful. "So you've lost your fiancee, have you? This presents an interesting problem for you, daughter."

Both Ukyou and Asuka blanched at that. "DAUGHTER?" they asked as one.

Ranma raised an eyebrow, completely ignoring the reactions of her companions. "I don't see how there's a problem. You tell us where she is, we rescue her, and we get her back home in time to coo..." Ranma trailed off, a look of horror flashing onto her face for a split second. She swallowed nervously before continuing. "OK, seein' as how this is Akane's night to cook an' all, maybe we wait till AFTER dinner to rescue her."

The old woman thwacked Ranma upside the head with her staff.

"ITTE! What was that for!?"

"That isn't the problem I was speaking of, daughter."

Ukyou shook her head incredulously, but said nothing.

Ranma frowned. "Well, what's the problem, then?"

"The problem is this," spake the withered troll as she produced a faded and crinkled map from the folds of her voluminous robes. She handed the map to Ranma, who took it looking slightly nonplused.

"Look it over, daughter, and tell me what you see," said Cologne.

Ranma glanced down at the map, taking a few moments to study it. When she was done with it, she handed it to Ukyou, who glanced at it before handing it to Asuka.

"It's a map of the mountains," said Ranma. "There's a hot-spring marked here," chimed in Asuka a moment later. The three girls exchanged glances and shrugged. Unseen by any of the others save Cologne, the two moon-cats arrived on the scene.

"The map," Cologne began, "divulges the location of a powerful magical artifact. The Kaisuifuu; the open-water kettle. A group of rowdy visitors will be here in a little while to retrieve this map and to take the Kaisuifuu back to China. Once there, they will most certainly not allow you to use it. If you want to use the Kaisuifuu, it must be now."

Ranma frowned. "What's the Open-Water Kettle do, and why would I want ta use it?"

Asuka also frowned, though hers was more of a `sourpuss' frown, whereas Ranma's had been more along the lines of a thoughtful frown. "Who cares about some stupid open-water kettle? We have to save Akane!" she turned to Cologne. "You know where she is, old hag, and you'd better tell me!"

*THWACK*

"ITTE!" yelped Asuka.

"Respect your elders, child."

Shampoo, who had been listening silently from the kitchen up until then, laughed quietly. "You is too stupid lillim, make great-grandmother mad and you be sorry."

Asuka glared at Shampoo. Ranma missed whatever snappy comeback she may have made, however, as at that moment, Cologne began to speak again. As the pig-tailed girl was far more interested in hearing what the old crone had to say than in sarcastic remarks traded between red-headed senshi and purple-haired amazons, the specifics of Asuka's comeback will have to remain a mystery.

Cologne smiled mysteriously as she spoke. "The kaisuifuu, as I said, is a powerful magical artifact related to Jusenkyou curses. Just as the curses have the power to transform your body into an alien form, so does the kaisuifuu have the power to restore you to your true form. It is not a cure, but it can unlock a locked curse."

Luna and Artemis exchanged glances. Intense whispers were traded back and forth between the two for a few moments before they turned and padded quietly out of the restaurant.

"Who the hell cares about locked curses and true forms?" Asuka asked in an annoyed tone of voice. "What about Akane? We can't just leave her as the prisoner of the Dark Kingdom! Who KNOWS what kind of torture they're putting her through!?"

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*** MEANWHILE, IN THE DARK KINGDOM ***

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"Come to me, Endymion," Beryl called from where she lounged slinkily in her silk-sheeted bed, clad only in black lingerie. "Take your rightful place at my side as my personal boy-toy."

Sitting in a chair in the corner of the room, Akane glared at Queen Beryl, clearly not amused by her attempts at seduction. "I'm not a boy, and I'm NOT INTERESTED!"

Beryl shrugged, stretching a bit more than was actually required by the gesture, and it would have done wonderful things to her chest if she hadn't been such an immensely unsexy creature.. "Fine. Come and be my personal girl-toy, then."

"I'm not a lesbian either!"

"Come now, Akane (if that's what you prefer to be called in this lifetime). Nine out of ten fanfic authors agree; you most certainly ARE a lesbian."

Akane blinked. When the statement had sunk in, she shrugged helplessly. "Well, who am I to disagree with such an enlightened mass of humanity? Let's get it on!"

Beryl smirked, and that was about all she had time to do before Akane had her locked in a passionate kiss, which quickly led to things that I am unable to describe in a fanfic that's only rated PG-13.

**************

**************

"They could be brainwashing her even as we speak," insisted Asuka, getting right up in Ranma's face as she went on. "Don't you care that your fiancee is probably being brutally tortured and corrupted into the service of evil!?"

Ranma looked thoughtful. "Well, maybe she's not in MORTAL danger. We could probably afford to wait a few days before rescuin' her..."

Ukyou frowned at that. "Ranchan..."

Cologne cackled. "Decide quickly, daughter, while you yet have time to decide."

"And what the hell do you mean by `daughter?'" Asuka demanded to know, now unable to restrain herself from voicing the question that had been on both her and Ukyou's mind since their arrival at the Cat Cafe. "How can you POSSIBLY be Ranma's mother when she's only sixteen, and you must be at LEAST two hundred yea..." she cut off abruptly as Cologne whacked her on the head with her staff. "ITTE!" she hissed, glaring daggers (so to speak) at the withered troll.

And then the withered old troll became Shampoo. There was no perceptible shift from one form to another - one moment she was a withered old mummy, the next, a bouncy purple-haired amazon.

"What the hell!?" yelled Asuka. Ranma's eyes widened, and Ukyou stared in shock.

Shampoo frowned from where she was watching the goings on. "Shampoo hate when great-grandmother do that," she muttered as she retrieved a can of yebisu from the fridge. Once retrieved, the beer was promptly chugged.

A moment later, Cologne took on Asuka's form, and then Ukyou's, and then to the form of a red-headed, extremely formal middle-aged Japanese woman. And then she was Ranma. And then she was a withered old troll once more. "What is a body to one such as me, children?" she asked, poking each of them in turn with her staff. "A toy. A bit of dust and clay to shape however I will. It so happens that I'm *FOND* of this shape."

The three girls stared at Cologne, unable to believe what they had just seen, and for the first time in her life, Asuka found herself at a loss for words.

"What are you?" Ukyou asked, her expression a mixture of horror and wonder.

Cologne smiled. "I'm Ranma's mother."

***********

"Are we agreed, then?" asked Artemis.

Luna nodded. "We can't let Ranma regain her male form."

Artemis blinked. "Were you even listening? No, we have to HELP Ranma regain her male form! Otherwise she'll hate us forever!"

Luna frowned. "What about the fact that when she regains her memories from the Silver Millenium, she'll expect and desire to be female?"

"What about the fact that as long as we're not welcome in Ranma's home, we can't enjoy Kasumi's cooking?"

Luna nodded thoughtfully. "I hadn't considered that..."

************

Some time later, with her decision made, Ranma began the longest walk of her life, and alone. Well, the walk to China was longer, but part of that was spent swimming, so I don't really think it counts. Besides, it's a metaphor. If I tell you my heart is breaking, do you think I mean it literally? In any case, the walk home was hard for her. She knew that when she got home, she had to face the Tendos. She had to tell them that Akane had been kidnapped. And that she, Ranma Saotome, had failed to protect her fiancee.

It was with a heavy heart that she opened the gate to the Tendo home and strode across the leaf-speckled yard. Kasumi was the only one who noticed her arrival. "Welcome back, Ranma-kun!" she called cheerfully. Ranma winced.

"Kasumi..." Ranma began, and then trailed off.

"Nani?"

Ranma grimaced. Best to get it over with. "Could you call everyone down here? I gotta tell ya somethin."

"Oh my. Certainly, Ranma. I'll be right back."

A few minutes later, the whole of the Tendo household was gathered around the increasingly uncomfortable pig-tailed girl.

"Well, son," said Soun, "Kasumi tells me you have something to tell us?"

Ranma nodded. "Yeah..."

There was a long silence, and in the silence, tension stretched out like the edge of a knife.

"Spit it out, Saotome," said Nabiki.

"... Akane's been kidnapped by demons."

Another long silence hung heavily in the air, until...

"Again?" asked Kasumi.

Soun began sobbing. "Oh, my poor little girl! Kidnapped by demons! Stolen away before she even had a chance to live! Now the schools will never be joined!"

Genma made some remarks that would, no doubt, have been along the lines of `I have failed, what did I do to deserve such an ungrateful son who allows his fiancee to be kidnapped by demons? Oh the shame,' had he not been a panda at the time. What actually came out was more along the lines of, "Growf. Grooooowrf. Growf growrf."

Ranma facefaulted. "Again!?" he exclaimed. "Whaddya you mean, `again!?'"

Nabiki shrugged. "Happens all the time. She'll probably be back tomorrow. By the end of the week at the latest."

"What!?"

Kasumi smiled. "You had us very worried there for a moment, Ranma-kun. For a moment I thought it was something serious." She glanced at Nabiki. "Do you remember the time she was kidnapped by Overfiend-chan?"

Nabiki smirked. "How could I forget? It took her nearly a month to get the ichor-stains off of mallet-sama. I didn't think there were perverted sex-demons stupid enough to go after a school-girl these days. My own little sister saving the world, heh." (1)

"WHAT!?"

**** MEANWHILE ****

"Ah, ah, aaaah! Beryl-chan!! Onegai! Ikitai! Ikitai yo!"

The Queen's laughter echoed out from her bed-chambers. So did the crack of a whip. Not for the first (and most certainly not for the last) time, the Dark Kingdom courtiers wished that the Queen would sound-proof her room.

Roseite, on the other hand, didn't seem bothered by the noise in the slightest. In a shimmer of Sakura petals, a dark-haired young man with a manic look in his eyes appeared at her side.

"And how goes the war today, my twisted sister?" asked Blue-Thunderite.

Roseite laughed. "OOOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Everyone cringed.

"The war goes well, brother-dear. Even as we speak, the Queen is binding Endymion to our cause."

Blue-Thunderite nodded. "That would indeed explain why the vermin have migrated from the palace again. Verily, she does prefer the rose distilled. Still, it will be good to see Endymion again. Who is he in this life?"

Roseite smiled, though there was no kindness in it. "Why, Akane Tendo, brother-dear."

Blue-Thunderite's eyes widened. "Akane Tendo! So pure and tidy! And With such ferocity! Truely a tigress amongst kittens!" He went on, but Roseite tuned him out. When you planned to live in the Dark Kingdom for any period of time, it was a useful skill to have.

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****Several minutes later****

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"Old Ghoul, gimme that map!" Ranma yelled as she burst into the Cat Cafe. The dinner rush was well under way, and though the place was insanely crowded, her voice still rang out clearly over the din.

Cologne pogoed out to meet her `daughter,' leaving Shampoo and Mousse to handle the restaurant for a few minutes. "Hmm? I thought you had decided to rescue your fiancee."

"Yeah, well that was before I found out that her getting kidnapped by demons was a `happens every week' kinda thing. Are you gonna give me the map or not?"

"My apologies, daughter, but the map is no longer in my possession. You recall the group of rowdy visitors that I mentioned?"

Ranma blinked. "Yeah, I remember somethin' about that."

Cologne gestured towards a position directly behind Ranma. "They're here."

Ranma turned around, and came face-to-breasts with a ... she looked up. Oh, right. Ok, face-to-face now, and with a drop-dead gorgeous platinum-blonde woman. A woman clad in vaguely ceremonial clothing that bore more than a slight resemblance to armor. A long, flowing, off-white cape, flowing hair, pointed ears, slitted, blood red eyes. But perhaps the most noticeable feature (especially as far as Ranma was concerned) was the damn well near palpable aura of power around her. Whoever this woman was, she RADIATED power in a way that made Ranma dizzy even thinking about it. She held the map in her left hand, and her eye was twitching with annoyance.

Face to face with Herb, `Prince' of the Musk, Ranma said about the only thing she could have in that situation.

"Shit."

END EPISODE 10

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1 - I've always wondered about this. Hentai anime is full of evil perverted monsters, yes? Ranma is filled with mallet-wielding school-girls with the power to unerringly smash perverts into low earth orbit without even breaking a sweat. Therefore, tentacle demons = perverts = valid targets for mallet-sama = completely and utterly doomed. Deep thoughts from P.H. Wise. ;P

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