Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ World Conflict II: Evangelion ❯ Dreams ( Chapter 5 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Vergessener Held 
I'm supposed to be an Angel. Angels have no free will. I don't want to fight my friends, but I have no choice. Or do I?
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Adventure / Action | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 09.08.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 7.5K | Visits: 224 | Status: Completed
I'm supposed to be an Angel. Angels have no free will. I don't want to fight my friends, but I have no choice. Or do I?
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Adventure / Action | Type: Self Insertion | Uploaded On: 09.08.2004 | Pages: 2 | Words: 7.5K | Visits: 224 | Status: Completed
RedMageNeko: I'm glad you like the way he turned out. He'll become much more important later on.
Please excuse my horrible timeline. The timelines I keep finding are these confusing as hell things. Oh, by the way, everyone. All the conversations on the ship are in English. The squad (Zack & Co.) only speak Japanese when on the ground. And behold, my new scene change! XD
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"YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN ME KILLED, YOU BASTARD!" Zakku yelled, punching the black man before him. Bruce just grinned, "Hey, if you screw up, population control." Bruce was a 6'2", 240 pound black. A Hunter, or Ian's class, Bruce was one of the best and also extremely cocky. Besides Shade, Bruce was one of the few people Zakku couldn't manage to beat down. And as if on cue, Shade walked in. "What's going on? You two should save your energy for fighting our enemies instead of each other," he said. "This bastard turned the test level up to 21! I nearly got killed!" Zakku said, turning to Shade, hoping he'd do something. Shade glared at Bruce. "Bruce, I hope you realize that you could be thrown in the brig for heightening the level while someone is training. We have limited staff and if you are responsible for the death of one I will make sure to have you thrown in the brig until we get back, where you'll be court marshalled!" Shade said, then looked to Zakku, "Ikari's son has run away from home. I expect you to retrieve him."
"Damn it! I knew this was going to happen! Stupid fucking.... by the way, your little report thing was wrong. It's GOD'S Angels, not Lucifer's!" Zakku said, then ran out. "You let him read the report!? Are you nuts!?" Bruce yelled after the door closed. "Hold your tongue, Bruce. I'm your superior, no matter what you think of my tactics. I'll handle this my way and you are not to get in the way of that, understand?" Shade said. Bruce groaned and saluted, "Yes, sir..."
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With the Section 2 agents in tow, Zakku approached the tent. "Alright, Shinji, c'mon out!" Zakku said, opening the flap. The first thing that met his eyes was a Thompson sub-machine gun (think World War II). "Kensuke, put down the Tommy gun or I'll break it. Shinji, get your stupid ass outta the tent before I drag you," he said calmly. Shinji curled up into a ball, facing his back to him. "I'm not going back," he said. "LOOK! YOUR FATHER DOESN'T GIVE TWO SHITS WHAT I DO AS LONG AS I BRING YOU BACK ALIVE AND WELL! Your mother might not be happy with me but that's something I'm willing to risk, SO GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE TENT! KENSUKE, POINT THAT THING SOMEWHERE ELSE!" Zakku roared, grabbing the gun and yanking it out of the boys hands. Zakku tore the tent down, letting the agents circle them. "Shinji, get up or I shoot Kensuke!" he yelled, pointing the Thompson at the young otaku. "Fine, I'll come! Are you happy now!?" Shinji said, grabbing his bags and stalking off.
"Look, damn it! I don't have every fucking waking moment to daddy you. I'm sorry that your father was an asshole. If it makes you feel any better, so was mine. The bastard never paid child support, saying he didn't have enough money, then got married again and didn't call me until two weeks later! Trust me! Atleast you didn't have to hear about all the lies!" Zakku yelled, walking after him and tossing the gun aside. "Your father atleast talked to you once in a while! Mine just tossed me aside, saying how useless I was. Atleast your's tried!" Shinji said, starting to cry. "Oh for the love of fucking GOD! The only things my father told me were lies! I'd get a monthly call saying he was planning to have me visit and how much he loved and cared! BUT YOU KNOW WHAT!? THAT DAY NEVER CAME! OR ATLEAST NOT UNTIL FIVE YEARS LATER! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ALL OF THAT BULLSHIT!" Zakku yelled, speeding up.
"Just leave me alone!" Shinji said, falling onto his knees and crying. "Get the fuck up and move!" Zakku yelled, stopping just behind him. The agents finally started to move towards them. Shinji didn't move. "I SAID GET THE FUCK UP!" Zakku yelled, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and yanking him to his feet. He turned the boy around, making him look into his eyes. "Look, I'm sorry that your father is an asshole. One day, he'll get his. If I have to, I'll do it myself. But for now, you have to do me a favor and keep piloting!" Zakku whispered, shaking the boy by grabbing his shoulders. "Can we go now?" Shinji said, looking away. "...yeah. Let's go," Zakku said, walking away with his arm around the boy's shoulders.
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"You're still going to run away?" Zakku said, sighing as he walked Shinji over to Touji and Kensuke. "You didn't have to come all the way out here to say good-bye," Shinji said to the two, ignoring Zakku's comment. "We're used to it. We always see our classmates off here when they leave. And Touji has something to say to you!" Kensuke said, then shoved Touji forward. Touji groaned and glared at him through the corner of his eye, then looked right at Shinji. "I wanted to say I'm sorry. It wasn't your fault that my sister got hurt and that it was wrong of me to hit you," he said, then looked at the ground, "So you have to pay me back. I want you to hit me. No holding back." Zakku merely watched as Shinji replied, "I can't do that. I could never hit someone." Touji sighed, "Look, just do it. I'll never be able to forgive myself if you don't." There was a silence.
"A-alright," Shinji said, pulling his fist back, then punching Touji straight in the face, making him fall over. "For a stick kid, you can punch pretty hard!" Zakku said, whistling. "Your time's up! Let's go!" one of the agents said. "I guess this is good-bye," Shinji said sadly. "Well, I guess now I'm going to have to pilot Unit-01," Zakku said, sighing, "Alright, kid. Let's go." Kensuke gave him a strange look, "Why do you treat him like a kid when you're barely older than him?" Zakku shrugged, "You'll have to find out on your own one day." With that, he started walking towards the agents, Shinji soon following him. Touji and Kensuke in the rear. The agents walked after Shinji, leaving Kensuke, Touji and Zakku alone to watch as their friend left. "You're pretty tough, Ikari! 'Bye!" Touji said. Shinji went around the corner, then flung himself back to turn towards them.
"No I'm not! I'm a coward! I'm just running away like I always do! I'm just a stupid coward!" Shinji said before the agents could carry him away. "Then you'll just have to grow stronger, won't you?" Zakku yelled, smiling as Shinji looked at him. "Let's go," one of the agents said, dragging him off before he could reply. "Well, I've gotta go! See ya!" Zakku said, running towards his motorcycle and driving off before they could say anything.
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Shinji stood at the train stop, the intercom saying something about a train coming in. The train approached. Either not listening or having a change of heart, Shinji stood there, not moving to board the train. "Aren't you going to get on?" Zakku said, leaning on the railing behind him. "I mustn't run away," Shinji kept muttering under his breath, but loud enough for him to hear. "Your mother'd be proud," Zakku said, giving the boy a bear hug from behind. "OUCH! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? THAT HURTS!" Shinji yelled, flailing his legs. "I'm so proud of you!" Zakku cooed, rubbing his cheek on his shoulder. "WHOAH! ZACK!? OH MY GOD! HE'S TURNED GAY!" Ian yelled, laughing. Zakku glared at him, "What would be wrong with me if I had?"
"Can you let go?" Shinji asked. "Sorry," Zakku said, letting go and walking towards Ian, who received a punch in the stomach, "I swear if you don't keep your mouth shut I'm going to end up killing you!" Ian nodded, "Gotcha." The sound of a car screeching to a stop was heard, causing everyone to look at Misato's car as she got out of it. "Better go talk to your lover," Zakku said, shoving Ian onto the tracks. Ian just glared at him, then jumped down and walked over to Misato. "So, he's not leaving after all?" she asked, smiling at him. "Er.... no, he's not. Although, you might want to seperate him from Zakku..... he's getting frisky," he replied, making a face. "What was that, asshole?" a voice said behind him. "Oh, hey, Zack! ...Could you leave? I'm busy talking to her," Ian said, making a slight nudging motion. Zakku took the hint.
"Dickhead," he said, hitting him in the stomach and walking to his motorcycle. "He is such a little prick. Why do you put up with him?" Misato said, leaning over to look at Ian's face, since he was slumped over. "I've known him since we were kids. Besides, he's not always like that," he replied, then looked at her and stood up straight. 'You'd better not screw up this chance, Ian!' was the thought that crossed Zakku's mind as he got on the motorcycle. "Er.... so..... Misato," Ian stumbled over his words. "What?" Misato said. "Would you..... would you like to go to dinner with me some time?" Ian said, smiling at her. "Sure. How about tomorrow night?" Misato said. "Sounds great. See ya then," Ian said, running off to his truck.
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"When is the next Angel coming?" Shade asked, playing with his hair. "I have no idea. Why the hell are you playing with your hair?" Zakku said, raising a brow at the strange behavior. "Boredom. You are dismissed," Shade said. Zakku broke into a salute, then walked out. The first thing that got him was a certain catgirl that pounced him. "I don't have any catnip, so why are you pouncing me?" Zakku asked, looking at her as she sat on top of him. "Because I love you!" Avira said, rubbing her cheek against his. "God, please kill me now!" Zakku groaned, trying to writhe out from under her, which only made her cling to him. People nearby began to stare. "SOMEONE HELP ME, DAMN IT!" Zakku yelled. "Could you two TRY not to have sex in the hall?" Anba said, standing over them.
"ANBA-CHAN!" Zakku shouted, pushing Avira off and jumping up to hug her, only to get a bear hug that squeezed the life out of him. "QUIT SPEAKING JAPANESE AND ENGLISH AT THE SAME TIME!" Anba said, squeezing harder. "Right," Zakku squeaked. Anba dropped him, "I heard moaning coming from your room. What was that about? Hmm?" Avira and Zakku stared at her. "I KNEW IT! YOU TWO HAD SEX! IS SHE PREGNANT!?" Anba yelled, then got a firm slap. "Don't yell it out loud!" Avira growled, then looked away, "I don't know. I'll have to take a test." Anba just gawked at her, "YOU TWO REALLY DID!? TEENAGE PREGNANCY! RAPIST! CHILD MOLESTER! SINNER!" Zakku slapped her in the back of the head as hard as he could, "You aren't Christian!" Anba shrugged, "You're still a sinner."
"Jesus-Freak!" Zakku said, then ran towards the transport room. "HEY! GET BACK HERE! YOU OWE ME A DATE!" Avira said, then looked down at herself, "I need to get a better dress first... YOU'LL ONLY GET AWAY THIS TIME!" Robert sighed as he watch all the commotion, "This is so stupid." A baby was planted in his arms. "I need to go down to buy more diapers," Castilla said. "Then I'm going with you!" Robert said. "I've been taking care of the baby all the time. I need to get out of here or it's going to drive me NUTS! SO you stay here and watch the baby," she said, then ran off. "This sucks," Robert said, then walked over to Anba, "Hey, Amber!" Anba smiled at him, "Hey, Bobby! How's the baby?" Robert laughed nervously, "Yeah, 'bout that... I know nothing of babies so FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HELP ME!"
"Of course! But first..... HUG!" Anba shouted, taking the baby from him in one arm, then giving him a crushing bear hug in the other. "Alright, that's enough!" Robert choked out. Anba let go, then walked off with the baby, "C'mon, Romeo, we've gotta take care of this baby!" she said. Grumbling, Robert followed her.
IDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOM (5 days earlier)
"They're a lot bigger up close," Misato said, looking up at the giant Angel corpse. "Got whatchou had comin', bastard!" Zakku yelled, kicking at the corpse. "SOMEONE'S got family issues," Misato said, raising a brow. "Don't get me started. I know some scary things about you," he replied, grinning like a madman. "Er.... right," Misato said. "Magnificent! Everything but the core is still intact! It's an almost perfect specimen!" Ritsuko said, flipping through a clipboard. "Hey, Ritsuko! Why am I here again?" Zakku said, dressed in a blue winter coat (Yes, I really wear them in summer) with a black T-shirt and long, baggy pants, along with leather boots. "How can you live with that coat on you?! Aren't you hot?" Shinji asked. "I used to be in America before I was kidnapped. I lived on the mainland, but I was up north enough to have to wear a winter coat almost year round," Zakku said.
"That doesn't really explain why you have it on, you know!" Misato said. "It brings back memories of when I was with my mother and my brother, alright?" Zakku said, sighing.
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601 appeared on the computer screen. "Cannot be analyzed," Zakku said before Misato could ask. "How did you know that?" Ritsuko asked, then tried again. "Like I said, I know some scary things!" Zakku said, then poured himself some coffee like everyone else. "That can't be right!" Misato said, looking at the screen. "It is. Despite their composition, Angels have almost the exact same patterns in DNA as humans," Ritsuko said. "You didn't figure that out when I came? If it were impossible, I wouldn't have kept my human form and become a monster," Zakku said, drinking his coffee. Shinji, however, was staring at Gendou's hands as a piece of the core was lowered. "He burned his hands opening a superheated entry plug with Rei in it just before you came," Zakku said, startling him. When Shinji looked at him, he had a grin that looked eerily like the one Gendou sometimes had.
"Bullshit! My father did that?" Shinji asked. "Yes, he did," Ritsuko said. "Hey, Ritsuko, why don't you come over to eat tonight?" Misato said, then looked at Zakku, "You can come, too." Zakku stared for a moment, a rather comic relief-like memory coming into his head. "Sure," he said, smiling.
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"I'll make dinner," Zakku said as he walked into the house. "What kind of host would I be if I let you cook?" Misato replied. "A very good one," he muttered in reply. "What was that?" she said, giving him a dirty look. "Nothing! Nothing at all! Hell, Pen Pen!" Zakku said, crouching down and hugging the warm-watered penguin, which looked rather scared in his arms. "You're such a cute little fella!" he said, squeezing Pen Pen tighter. "I think you'd better stop before you hurt him," Ritsuko said, tapping him on the shoulder. "Yes, mother!" Zakku sighed, then let go and walked to the couch, sitting in it. "Looks like my uncle's mother's place," he said, looking around, then saw Shinji's room. "Misato, you aren't molesting the poor kid, are you? 'Little Shin's Room'? It even has a little heart next to it!" he said, grinning.
"Yep! I just love my Shinji!" Misato said, wrapping her arms around the young Japanese boy. Zakku made a strange noise that sounded like a drunk sheep, shuddering. "You are a strange boy," Ritsuko said, sitting down on the couch, as far away from his end as possible. "Zakku, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH SHOES ON IN MY HOUSE!?" Misato yelled. "Eh?" Zakku said, then looked down at his feet, which still had shoes on them (In Japan, not taking your shoes off before entering a home is extremely rude), "Sorry!" With that, he took off his shoes and ran over to the door, putting them by everyone else's. "Not used to Japanese culture yet. Still trying to get the girls at school to stop bowing so I can't see down their shirts," he said. "You really look down their shirts!?" Ritsuko said, sounding slightly angry. "It's not my fault they don't button their blouses.... yes, I looked the first couple of times. I'm a guy, so sue me!" he said, sighing as he sat down on the floor with his legs crossed.
"Didn't you say you were going to make dinner?" Misato said, looking down at him. "Oh, right!" Zakku said, getting up and walking into the kitchen. "I'll help," Shinji said, walking after him. "That boy is like a cross between an evil Shinji and a good Gendou," Misato said, sighing. "Shinji being evil is rather hard to imagine, but a good Gendou isn't," Ritsuko said, although she mumbled the last part. "DAMN IT! WHAT'S WITH ALL THIS INSTANT CRAP!?" Zakku's voice bellowed. "Okay, he doesn't act like Kaji," Misato said, sounding irritated, "If you don't like the food I have you can eat somewhere else!" Soft grumbling was heard, accompanied with a few swears in English.
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"Booya! Two dishes of curry!" Zakku said, placing them down in front of the girls. "Why two? We only needed one," Ritsuko asked. "Well, I've never really had Japanese food before, so I figured I'd make a spicy kind incase I don't like the regular curry!" he said, sitting down. "I'm guessing you don't know how to use chopsticks, then?" Misato asked, grinning as she played with her chopsticks. "Haha, very funny! If I need hand-eye coordination, I've got my video games, thanks!" he replied, then started serving everyone as Shinji sat down. "It looks pretty good for your first Japanese dish," Ritsuko said, starting to eat a small bit, "Hey, it's not bad." Misato picked up her bowl just as she was about to be served, revealing some sort of instant ramen. "Slop some that stuff on top of this!" she said.
"Ugh.... how can you eat that stuff?" Zakku said, sitting down and starting to struggle with picking the food up with his chopsticks. "The trick is to stir it up until it becomes a sort of the sludge. It's yummy to the max!" Misato said, eating the ramen. "Right... Anyway," Zakku said, eating some of the curry, "Little bland, don'tcha think?" Shinji shook his head, then went for seconds. Out of the wrong bowl. Unfortunately, he didn't notice until-- "WATER! I NEED WATER!" he said, running into the kitchen. "Milk works better! Water will just make it hotter!" Zakku yelled after him, then got started on his spicy dish."Hey, Zakku? Do me a favor and give Rei her ID card tomorrow," Ritsuko said, handing it to him. "Eh?" he said, a memory floating to the top of his head, making him spit his curry back into the bowl, "NO WAY!" The girls raised a brow at him. "Aw, I think he's afraid of Rei!" Misato said, slightly drunk.
"Give you afraid, Ms. Hangover! Give me the fuggin' ID!" Zakku said, grabbing it from Ritsuko. He suddenly stopped halfway through withdrawing his arm when memories flashed in front of his eyes. He was standing in what looked like a garden. Walking through it, Zakku stopped when he spotted two figures. "It's good to see you again, brother!" Adam said. Lilith walked up to him, hugging him, "It's been too long!" Zakku came to while lying on the floor, the ID card in hand. "Zakku! Wake up! Are you alright?" Shinji asked. "He'll be fine. He just blacked out for a minute," Ritsuko said, then leaned over him, "Can you see alright?" Zakku made a motion for them to go, "I can see down your shirt, so obviously. Please move." Ritsuko gave him a dirty look as she sat up straight, "You really are a pervert. That's one of the few things Misato was right about."
Misato was passed out on the floor, drunk. "Figures!" Zakku said, trying to lift her up, "Shinji, a little help would be appreciated in the effort to move her into her bedroom!" Shinji didn't move. "I'll help," Ritsuko said, lifting Misato up by her ankles. "You're rather weak for an angel," she said. "You can always move her on your own," Zakku said as they walked into the bedroom, laying Misato down on her bed. "I need to run some tests on you tomorrow, also," Ritsuko said. "Fine. I'm leaving. Thanks for dinner Shinji!" Zakku said, running to the door and getting his shoes on, then leaving. "Why do I get the feeling he's avoiding us?" Shinji asked. "Because he is," Ritsuko said, looking at the closed door.
IDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOM (the next day)
"Rei? Hello?" Zakku said, walking into her home. "Holy shit, it's even dirtier than I remember it being!" he said, walking towards the bedroom. "Rei? Where aaaare youuuu?" he said, then stopped when he saw blood everywhere, "Holy shit!" There was blood on her pillows, her sheets, her clothes, baskets' worth of bandages and on top of her endtable were Gendo's glasses. "I swear if I end up like Shinji I'll kill myself," he muttered, putting the glasses on, which fit perfectly. "It's like when I didn't wear my glasses when I had to," he said, then turned around as he heard the shower turn off. Standing there, in the nude, was Rei. "Every tried clothes?" Zakku asked. "What are you doing with the commander's glasses on? Give them back," Rei said, taking them off his face.
"I was sent to give you yo-- FUCK!" Zakku yelled in English, slipping and hitting his head on the edge of the table as he fell on top of Rei. Thankfully, he didn't land in the embarrassing position that Shinji had; his arms were conveniently placed on either side of her. "Here is your ID card," he said, pulling it out of his back pocket and dropping it, then leaping forward like a cat, only bringing himself to his feet. "Thank you," Rei said, getting dressed. "Why do you fight, Rei?" Zakku asked, leaning on the wall. There was no answer, or none that he heard. The memories came flooding again. "Why do you continue to serve him so blindly?" Lucifer asked as he passed by him. Lucifer had just been judged for rebelling against Him. "I don't have free will, like you and Tabris. Believe me, if there was any other way, I would go by it," he replied. "What would you fight for with that freedom?" Lucifer asked. "I don't know what's worth fighting for," Zakku replied.
"Duarte, are you alright?" Rei asked, looking down at him, the usual blank expression on her face. Zakku opened his eyes, "I'm going to go crazy before the 10th if this keeps up.... yeah, I'm all right." Rei walked out of the house without saying a word. "I still don't know what's worth fighting for," he muttered quietly, then got up and left the house. By the time he was at his motorcycle, Rei was almost a block away. Starting the bike, Zakku rode alongside her, "Get on. It's faster!" Rei looked at him for a moment, then climbed in. "Hang on to your skirt!" Zakku roared, speeding off like a maniac.
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"Start the test!" Gendou said. "Starting test!" Maya sounded. Screens of statistics opened up. "All nerve connections stable!" Shigeru said. "All wave patterns green!" Maya said, "0.5 to borderline. 0.4....0.3....0.2...0.1.... Borderline crossed!" Gendou looked down at the young boy standing at his side. "Do you know when the next angel is coming?" he asked. "You know there's no cheating on a test. Besides, I'm not your pawn, I'm the player sitting across from you, remember?" Zakku said, then sighed, "But I suppose I can tell you my next move. It's supposed to arrive within the next few minutes. Of course, with my appearance, the times may have been altered."
"The activation test is successful! Prepare Unit-01 for launch!" Gendou said. "No, don't. If Ramiel appears, I'll take care of him myself," Zakku said, then walked out of the room, heading to the outside of the base. Hours passed, but Ramiel didn't come. "I guess it's time to head ho--" Zakku started, memories flashing again before him. "You keep doing what I tell you not to do, Humanis! You cannot block a whip with your sword or you take the risk of losing your weapons. Dodge it! Don't flinch!" Shamshiel said, unraveling his whip from around the double-edged sword. It was atleast three times Zakku's size, but he was still forced to use it. "Are you ready for another try?" Shamshiel asked. "Yes, big brother!" Zakku said cheerfully.
The memories faded. "I think I need more sleep," he said, walking to his motorcycle.
IDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOM (Today)
"Wait for me!" Avira shouted, hugging Zakku. "Annoying bitch," Zakku said, sticking his tongue out at her. "We'll never have kids if I decide to cut off your nuts," she said in an angry tone. "You wouldn't dare!" Zakku said nervously as he carried her, almost piggy-back style, to the teleporter. "Oh really? Where's a combat knife when you need one?" Avira said, kissing him on the cheek. "Send us down," he said to the operator at the terminal. "Yes, sir!" he replied. The teleporter glowed and Zakku and Avira shot downwards, looking like small laser beams, returning to their normal forms once they hit the ground. They always landed just outside Tokyo-03, a couple of miles off the road. "Man, I hate that! Makes me feel numb!" Zakku complained. A third laser dropped down behind them, Castilla forming from it. "What are you two doing down here?" she asked, her voice rather cold.
"Castilla! Hey! ...Don't attack me!" Zakku shouted, flinching as she moved her hand forward. "Much as I dislike you, you're still a person. I have to show some respect," she said, taking his hand and shaking it. "Jee, that makes me feel SO much better about myself!" Zakku said, shaking her hand before withdrawing it. "Why are you here, anyway? Need baby supplies?" Avira asked. "Yes. Robert and I ran out of diapers. I suppose you will be needing baby supplies soon. I heard about the two of you," Castilla said, smiling. "W-who told you!?" Zakku said, his face practically bleeding with embarrassment. "I was just down the hall when she said something about taking a pregnancy test. Not that hard to figure out who would do it," Castilla said. "Well, yeah... I was going to stop by a pharmacy or something along the way," Avira said, fumbling with her skirt. "You haven't grown at all within a year. I have to admit I like the dresses you wear, though!" Zakku said, hugging her, then looking down, "Ever considered a breast reduction?"
"Stupid jerk!" Avira yelled, slapping him. "Ow! Damn it, woman! It was a joke! Although, you'd be a lot better off if you did," Zakku said, then covered his head as she went to slap him again. "STUPID STUPID STUPID PERVERTED JERK!" Avira said, then kicked him in the shin with her high heels, causing her to fall over. Zakku helped her up, which earned him a slap. Castilla laughed, "Lord help me if my kids are like you two!" Zakku sighed, "Alright, well we gotta go get a pregnancy... thingy, then go on our date." Castilla raised a brow, "Alright, but like Ian says, 'Keep it PG-13!'. We wouldn't want the baby to get hurt." With that said, she pushed a button on her wrist communicator. A laser came down, a Honda appearing when it hit the ground, the model unknown to Zakku. The only thing he DID know was that it was purple. "Well? Get the bike!" Avira said. Zakku pushed a button on his own communicator. His motorcycle, along with the sidecart (with the same paintjob), appeared before them.
"Alright, time to get in!" Zakku yelled, putting on his jacket and helmet. "Don't drive like an idiot this time!" Avira said, trying to fix her dress, which was black with white lining and trim, along with a hat to cover her ears. She got in the cart, then screamed as they darted off. "Those two may be adults legally, but they're still kids," Castilla said, sighing as she got into her car.
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"Now that we've bought the test thing, can WE PLEASE LEAVE!? I hate pharmacies. The employees are always slacking off," Zakku said, getting on his motorcycle. People were staring at him, but he didn't really care. "Shout it to the whole world, why don't you?" Avira said, then started grumbling. "Alright! Off to the movies!" Zakku said, then started his insane driving again. "I'm going to kill you!" Avira screamed. "I don't HAVE to take you on a date, you know!" Zakku said, slowing down as he saw a movie theatre. Leaving the jacket and helmet in a compartment underneath the seat of the sidecart, they approached the theatre. "Stupid wind. If it keeps blowing like this my hat's going to fly off," Avira said. "And I grow angel wings every 6 hours. Don't worry about it," Zakku said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.
Avira stopped when she saw the posters. "I want to see this one!" Avira said, pointing at a poster of a horror movie. "Fine. Let's go!" Zakku said, dragging her towards the ticket booth.
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"I'm going to have nightmares for the rest of the month because of that," Avira said, slightly freaked out still. "Hence why I don't watch horror movies often," Zakku said, finishing his soda and tossing it into the trash bin. "And now we're going somewhere romantic, right? Zack? What's wrong?" Avira asked as Zakku fell over. "Wake up, hun. This isn't funny. Wake up!" Avira said, shaking him. "Somebody call an ambulance!" a man shouted. Within minutes, an ambulance came and picked him up, Avira riding in the back with him. "Are you his friend or family?" one of the medics asked. "I'm his girlfriend," she replied, watching Zakku carefully.
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"What the fuck is going on!? Can't you people leave me the hell alone!?" Zakku yelled as the other Angels appeared. "We are here to let you know of your restrictions. First, you do not have free will. Second, you cannot ingest alcohol. Third, you will soon lose your gender. Fou--" Gaghiel started. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'LOSE YOUR GENDER'!? God's going to come and take away my dick!?" Zakku yelled in anger. "Angels are not allowed to have gender, among other things," Tabris said, sounding irritated. "What the fuck!? Almisael's a girl and Tabris has a dong! Why can't I have gender!? Fuck your God! Give me back my humanity, damn it!" Zakku yelled, grabbing the merperson. "You no longer have free will. You will have to test the humans. You cannot have alcohol. It is an addictive substance and therefore sacriligious (correct me if I'm wrong on that). You may not have gender. It will interfere with duties," Sandalphon said.
"Fuck you! Give me my humanity back! Give all this angelic crap to someone else! I want my free will, I want my god damned alcohol AND I WANT MY DICK BACK, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" Zakku said, throwing Gaghiel into Sandalphon. "You are not able to make that cho--" Arael started. "Actually, he can. He was human at first. God cannot interfere with free will," Tabris said. "Haha! Bitches! Now give me my fucking humanity!" Zakku said before hugging Tabris. "...Fine. You will be human once again. You will no longer have the benefits nor the restrictions of an Angel. Your choice cannot be undone," Israfel said. "Thank God. And fuck you. Now let me wake up already!" Zakku said, waving them away. All of them left, save Tabris.
"What do you want?" Zakku asked, looking at him. "I just wanted to congratulate you on your decision. You gave up power and eternal life to have your own free will. I was created with that, but I can imagine how hard it must be to lose it. I suppose one day we will have to fight, seeing as how you are still fighting alongside the Lilims," Tabris said. "Probably. But everyone has a duty that gives their life purpose. Mine is to protect the people I love, even if it means fighting alongside those I hate," Zakku said. "Then we'll meet again some day. By the way, Ramiel will be testing you soon, so be prepared!" Tabris said, then disappeared. Zakku opened his eyes and sat up, looking around the hospital room.
"Zack! You're awake!" Avira squealed, hugging him. "Excuse me for a moment," Zakku said, prying her off, then looking down at a certain area, "YES! I DIDN'T LOSE IT! THANK GOD!" Anba covered her ears, "Stop shouting. You're giving me a headache." Ian grinned as he punched the boy in his shoulder, "You had us scared! Now what didn't you lose?" Zakku sighed, "The Angels have been talking to me for the past couple of days. This time, they told me I couldn't have free will, drink alcohol, or have a gender, so I told them to give me back my humanity and HERE WE ARE!" Robert grunted in annoyance, "We could have used it for information." Zakku glared at him, "And it would only cost my sanity, making any statements I made untrustworthy." Robert shut his mouth, plain and simple.
"Well, Mr. Duarte, there seems to be nothing wrong... with.... you?!" The doctor said, then stared at Avira, who's hat had fallen off when she hugged Zakku. "Get him out of here!" Zakku yelled. The others shoved the doctor out. "Here's some fatigues! Put them on!" Ian said, tossing him military fatigues to him while Robert held the door closed. "Fine, but don't blame me if you see my privates!" Zakku said, quickly getting dressed in a record of 40 seconds, not including the boots. "Alright, let's go!" Robert said, opening the door. Zakku finished tying his boots, then dragged Avira out of the room, leaving the hat there. "Security! Stop them!" a nurse shouted. A security guard ran in front of them, drawing his Glock. Ian tore his strange shotgun out from under his pant leg, cocking it. He fired a shot of a misty white liquid at the guard, freezing him.
"DID YOU JUST HIT HIM WITH LIQUID NITROGEN!?" Zakku said, staring at the frozen body. "That doesn't last too long, now move!" Ian yelled, dragging him away. They kept running until they came to the stairs (are you REALLY going to wait for the elevator?), then went down to the first floor. By now, a large group of security guards had gathered at the main entrance. As soon as they hit the bottom of the steps, Lucius and Yuko were waiting for them. "So you found him. He looks pretty cute in fatigues... don't give me that look! You look at girls all the time!" Yuko said, adding the last part when Lucius' face turned into an annoyed one. "Spare me. Just don't kill anybody!" Zakku yelled, running right towards the guards. A nurse pushing a cart with food on it moved out of the way, forgetting the cart. As Zakku ran past it, Anba lifted her hand up, causing the cart to lift, then threw it into four of the guards.
"Outta my way!" Zakku said, using a cyclone kick to send a guard into the glass doors. Lucius clotheslined the remaining two, who were confused as to what was going on. The group ran by their bodies and outside, where Shade and Castilla were waiting in a grey van. "What are we now? The Trenchcoat Mafia?" Zakku said as he got into the back. "Shut up and let everyone else in!" Castilla yelled. As Robert shut the door to the somewhat cramped van, Shade finally spoke. "I suppose he's no longer an Angel, considering he'd have wings by now if he was," he said. "Yeah? Well I like my beer, my free will and ESPECIALLY having a dick, thank you very much!" Zakku said. "Calling all units, calling all units! There has been an assault in the main hospital, the suspects are driving a grey van!" a voice said over the obviously stolen police radio. "Great! Just great! Now we're criminals!" Zakku groaned.
"It's my fault. Stupid cat ears," Avira said, her ears flattening out. "Oh don't get all angst on me. It's not your fault," Zakku said, scratching her behind the ears, which made her purr. "Don't start getting romantic in here," Ian said. "So, when is the next Angel attacking?" Shade asked, making a sharp turn as the police finally made an appearance. "Ramiel's going to be here pretty soon. I don't know exactly when," Zakku said, then yelling profanities as he hit his head on the side of the van as they hit a bump. "I think now would be a good time to change it back to it's original form," Yuko said, looking through the small window in the back of the van. "Robert, man the rocket launcher. Amber, Lucius I want you two to man the machine guns," Shade said, pushing a button. A white line flashed over the van, showing it was actually a rather large jeep, complete with two machine guns and a rocket launcher latched onto the back.
"How come nobody told me about this thing!?" Zakku yelled, as the jeep did not have a roof, making the wind loud. "We just developed it! You should see what else it can do!" Castilla yelled back. "Let me guess... it can fly?" Zakku asked. "Got it in one!" she replied, smiling back at him. "You leave my Zacky alone!" Avira said, latching onto him. "You're way too clingy. And you need a breast reduction," Zakku said, earning him a slap that could be heard even over the wind. A police car exploded as Lucius shot a police car in it's engine atleast four times. "I don't need Zack! I've got Robert!" Castilla yelled. "Hey, Shade! Can I drive?" Ian said. "Not in this lifetime!" Shade yelled, making a sharp right turn onto the highway. "What about my motorcycle?" Zakku yelled, struggling to be heard over the howling wind. "I can make you a new one!" Yuko yelled, then jumped as Robert finally launched a rocket, which was heard with a loud screeching.
"We're almost at the transportation point!" Shade yelled, then made a sharp right, smashing through the railing and continuing towards the edge of the highway, heading straight into the woods. "OH MY FUCKING GOD! YOU ARE ONE CRAZY BAAAASTAAAAARD!" Zakku screamed as the jeep flew off the highway, landing roughly as it swerved and bounced. "Help!" Anba screamed, half-hanging out of the jeep. Ian yanked her back in. "Alright! Hit it!" Yuko yelled. Shade pushed a button, causing everything to flash. They were once again on the Basroil. "Those cops were incompetent!" Ian said as he climbed out. "No chit-chat! Get straight to your rooms! You're going to need rest for tomorrow's training!" Shade said. Everyone groaned, but left for their rooms without another word. "Ahhh, memories..." Shade said after they left, grinning to himself.
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FINALLY! I'M DONE! I got a new mouse! *dances like Micheal Jackson* Anyway, DON'T REVIEW UNLESS YOU CAN NAME ONE GOOD THING AND ONE BAD THING ABOUT THIS CHAPTER! IF YOU DON'T TELL ME ONE GOOD THING AND ONE BAD THING, I WILL FLAME YOU! Now go away so I can finish the next one!
Please excuse my horrible timeline. The timelines I keep finding are these confusing as hell things. Oh, by the way, everyone. All the conversations on the ship are in English. The squad (Zack & Co.) only speak Japanese when on the ground. And behold, my new scene change! XD
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"YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN ME KILLED, YOU BASTARD!" Zakku yelled, punching the black man before him. Bruce just grinned, "Hey, if you screw up, population control." Bruce was a 6'2", 240 pound black. A Hunter, or Ian's class, Bruce was one of the best and also extremely cocky. Besides Shade, Bruce was one of the few people Zakku couldn't manage to beat down. And as if on cue, Shade walked in. "What's going on? You two should save your energy for fighting our enemies instead of each other," he said. "This bastard turned the test level up to 21! I nearly got killed!" Zakku said, turning to Shade, hoping he'd do something. Shade glared at Bruce. "Bruce, I hope you realize that you could be thrown in the brig for heightening the level while someone is training. We have limited staff and if you are responsible for the death of one I will make sure to have you thrown in the brig until we get back, where you'll be court marshalled!" Shade said, then looked to Zakku, "Ikari's son has run away from home. I expect you to retrieve him."
"Damn it! I knew this was going to happen! Stupid fucking.... by the way, your little report thing was wrong. It's GOD'S Angels, not Lucifer's!" Zakku said, then ran out. "You let him read the report!? Are you nuts!?" Bruce yelled after the door closed. "Hold your tongue, Bruce. I'm your superior, no matter what you think of my tactics. I'll handle this my way and you are not to get in the way of that, understand?" Shade said. Bruce groaned and saluted, "Yes, sir..."
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With the Section 2 agents in tow, Zakku approached the tent. "Alright, Shinji, c'mon out!" Zakku said, opening the flap. The first thing that met his eyes was a Thompson sub-machine gun (think World War II). "Kensuke, put down the Tommy gun or I'll break it. Shinji, get your stupid ass outta the tent before I drag you," he said calmly. Shinji curled up into a ball, facing his back to him. "I'm not going back," he said. "LOOK! YOUR FATHER DOESN'T GIVE TWO SHITS WHAT I DO AS LONG AS I BRING YOU BACK ALIVE AND WELL! Your mother might not be happy with me but that's something I'm willing to risk, SO GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE TENT! KENSUKE, POINT THAT THING SOMEWHERE ELSE!" Zakku roared, grabbing the gun and yanking it out of the boys hands. Zakku tore the tent down, letting the agents circle them. "Shinji, get up or I shoot Kensuke!" he yelled, pointing the Thompson at the young otaku. "Fine, I'll come! Are you happy now!?" Shinji said, grabbing his bags and stalking off.
"Look, damn it! I don't have every fucking waking moment to daddy you. I'm sorry that your father was an asshole. If it makes you feel any better, so was mine. The bastard never paid child support, saying he didn't have enough money, then got married again and didn't call me until two weeks later! Trust me! Atleast you didn't have to hear about all the lies!" Zakku yelled, walking after him and tossing the gun aside. "Your father atleast talked to you once in a while! Mine just tossed me aside, saying how useless I was. Atleast your's tried!" Shinji said, starting to cry. "Oh for the love of fucking GOD! The only things my father told me were lies! I'd get a monthly call saying he was planning to have me visit and how much he loved and cared! BUT YOU KNOW WHAT!? THAT DAY NEVER CAME! OR ATLEAST NOT UNTIL FIVE YEARS LATER! YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO ALL OF THAT BULLSHIT!" Zakku yelled, speeding up.
"Just leave me alone!" Shinji said, falling onto his knees and crying. "Get the fuck up and move!" Zakku yelled, stopping just behind him. The agents finally started to move towards them. Shinji didn't move. "I SAID GET THE FUCK UP!" Zakku yelled, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and yanking him to his feet. He turned the boy around, making him look into his eyes. "Look, I'm sorry that your father is an asshole. One day, he'll get his. If I have to, I'll do it myself. But for now, you have to do me a favor and keep piloting!" Zakku whispered, shaking the boy by grabbing his shoulders. "Can we go now?" Shinji said, looking away. "...yeah. Let's go," Zakku said, walking away with his arm around the boy's shoulders.
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"You're still going to run away?" Zakku said, sighing as he walked Shinji over to Touji and Kensuke. "You didn't have to come all the way out here to say good-bye," Shinji said to the two, ignoring Zakku's comment. "We're used to it. We always see our classmates off here when they leave. And Touji has something to say to you!" Kensuke said, then shoved Touji forward. Touji groaned and glared at him through the corner of his eye, then looked right at Shinji. "I wanted to say I'm sorry. It wasn't your fault that my sister got hurt and that it was wrong of me to hit you," he said, then looked at the ground, "So you have to pay me back. I want you to hit me. No holding back." Zakku merely watched as Shinji replied, "I can't do that. I could never hit someone." Touji sighed, "Look, just do it. I'll never be able to forgive myself if you don't." There was a silence.
"A-alright," Shinji said, pulling his fist back, then punching Touji straight in the face, making him fall over. "For a stick kid, you can punch pretty hard!" Zakku said, whistling. "Your time's up! Let's go!" one of the agents said. "I guess this is good-bye," Shinji said sadly. "Well, I guess now I'm going to have to pilot Unit-01," Zakku said, sighing, "Alright, kid. Let's go." Kensuke gave him a strange look, "Why do you treat him like a kid when you're barely older than him?" Zakku shrugged, "You'll have to find out on your own one day." With that, he started walking towards the agents, Shinji soon following him. Touji and Kensuke in the rear. The agents walked after Shinji, leaving Kensuke, Touji and Zakku alone to watch as their friend left. "You're pretty tough, Ikari! 'Bye!" Touji said. Shinji went around the corner, then flung himself back to turn towards them.
"No I'm not! I'm a coward! I'm just running away like I always do! I'm just a stupid coward!" Shinji said before the agents could carry him away. "Then you'll just have to grow stronger, won't you?" Zakku yelled, smiling as Shinji looked at him. "Let's go," one of the agents said, dragging him off before he could reply. "Well, I've gotta go! See ya!" Zakku said, running towards his motorcycle and driving off before they could say anything.
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Shinji stood at the train stop, the intercom saying something about a train coming in. The train approached. Either not listening or having a change of heart, Shinji stood there, not moving to board the train. "Aren't you going to get on?" Zakku said, leaning on the railing behind him. "I mustn't run away," Shinji kept muttering under his breath, but loud enough for him to hear. "Your mother'd be proud," Zakku said, giving the boy a bear hug from behind. "OUCH! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? THAT HURTS!" Shinji yelled, flailing his legs. "I'm so proud of you!" Zakku cooed, rubbing his cheek on his shoulder. "WHOAH! ZACK!? OH MY GOD! HE'S TURNED GAY!" Ian yelled, laughing. Zakku glared at him, "What would be wrong with me if I had?"
"Can you let go?" Shinji asked. "Sorry," Zakku said, letting go and walking towards Ian, who received a punch in the stomach, "I swear if you don't keep your mouth shut I'm going to end up killing you!" Ian nodded, "Gotcha." The sound of a car screeching to a stop was heard, causing everyone to look at Misato's car as she got out of it. "Better go talk to your lover," Zakku said, shoving Ian onto the tracks. Ian just glared at him, then jumped down and walked over to Misato. "So, he's not leaving after all?" she asked, smiling at him. "Er.... no, he's not. Although, you might want to seperate him from Zakku..... he's getting frisky," he replied, making a face. "What was that, asshole?" a voice said behind him. "Oh, hey, Zack! ...Could you leave? I'm busy talking to her," Ian said, making a slight nudging motion. Zakku took the hint.
"Dickhead," he said, hitting him in the stomach and walking to his motorcycle. "He is such a little prick. Why do you put up with him?" Misato said, leaning over to look at Ian's face, since he was slumped over. "I've known him since we were kids. Besides, he's not always like that," he replied, then looked at her and stood up straight. 'You'd better not screw up this chance, Ian!' was the thought that crossed Zakku's mind as he got on the motorcycle. "Er.... so..... Misato," Ian stumbled over his words. "What?" Misato said. "Would you..... would you like to go to dinner with me some time?" Ian said, smiling at her. "Sure. How about tomorrow night?" Misato said. "Sounds great. See ya then," Ian said, running off to his truck.
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"When is the next Angel coming?" Shade asked, playing with his hair. "I have no idea. Why the hell are you playing with your hair?" Zakku said, raising a brow at the strange behavior. "Boredom. You are dismissed," Shade said. Zakku broke into a salute, then walked out. The first thing that got him was a certain catgirl that pounced him. "I don't have any catnip, so why are you pouncing me?" Zakku asked, looking at her as she sat on top of him. "Because I love you!" Avira said, rubbing her cheek against his. "God, please kill me now!" Zakku groaned, trying to writhe out from under her, which only made her cling to him. People nearby began to stare. "SOMEONE HELP ME, DAMN IT!" Zakku yelled. "Could you two TRY not to have sex in the hall?" Anba said, standing over them.
"ANBA-CHAN!" Zakku shouted, pushing Avira off and jumping up to hug her, only to get a bear hug that squeezed the life out of him. "QUIT SPEAKING JAPANESE AND ENGLISH AT THE SAME TIME!" Anba said, squeezing harder. "Right," Zakku squeaked. Anba dropped him, "I heard moaning coming from your room. What was that about? Hmm?" Avira and Zakku stared at her. "I KNEW IT! YOU TWO HAD SEX! IS SHE PREGNANT!?" Anba yelled, then got a firm slap. "Don't yell it out loud!" Avira growled, then looked away, "I don't know. I'll have to take a test." Anba just gawked at her, "YOU TWO REALLY DID!? TEENAGE PREGNANCY! RAPIST! CHILD MOLESTER! SINNER!" Zakku slapped her in the back of the head as hard as he could, "You aren't Christian!" Anba shrugged, "You're still a sinner."
"Jesus-Freak!" Zakku said, then ran towards the transport room. "HEY! GET BACK HERE! YOU OWE ME A DATE!" Avira said, then looked down at herself, "I need to get a better dress first... YOU'LL ONLY GET AWAY THIS TIME!" Robert sighed as he watch all the commotion, "This is so stupid." A baby was planted in his arms. "I need to go down to buy more diapers," Castilla said. "Then I'm going with you!" Robert said. "I've been taking care of the baby all the time. I need to get out of here or it's going to drive me NUTS! SO you stay here and watch the baby," she said, then ran off. "This sucks," Robert said, then walked over to Anba, "Hey, Amber!" Anba smiled at him, "Hey, Bobby! How's the baby?" Robert laughed nervously, "Yeah, 'bout that... I know nothing of babies so FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HELP ME!"
"Of course! But first..... HUG!" Anba shouted, taking the baby from him in one arm, then giving him a crushing bear hug in the other. "Alright, that's enough!" Robert choked out. Anba let go, then walked off with the baby, "C'mon, Romeo, we've gotta take care of this baby!" she said. Grumbling, Robert followed her.
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"They're a lot bigger up close," Misato said, looking up at the giant Angel corpse. "Got whatchou had comin', bastard!" Zakku yelled, kicking at the corpse. "SOMEONE'S got family issues," Misato said, raising a brow. "Don't get me started. I know some scary things about you," he replied, grinning like a madman. "Er.... right," Misato said. "Magnificent! Everything but the core is still intact! It's an almost perfect specimen!" Ritsuko said, flipping through a clipboard. "Hey, Ritsuko! Why am I here again?" Zakku said, dressed in a blue winter coat (Yes, I really wear them in summer) with a black T-shirt and long, baggy pants, along with leather boots. "How can you live with that coat on you?! Aren't you hot?" Shinji asked. "I used to be in America before I was kidnapped. I lived on the mainland, but I was up north enough to have to wear a winter coat almost year round," Zakku said.
"That doesn't really explain why you have it on, you know!" Misato said. "It brings back memories of when I was with my mother and my brother, alright?" Zakku said, sighing.
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601 appeared on the computer screen. "Cannot be analyzed," Zakku said before Misato could ask. "How did you know that?" Ritsuko asked, then tried again. "Like I said, I know some scary things!" Zakku said, then poured himself some coffee like everyone else. "That can't be right!" Misato said, looking at the screen. "It is. Despite their composition, Angels have almost the exact same patterns in DNA as humans," Ritsuko said. "You didn't figure that out when I came? If it were impossible, I wouldn't have kept my human form and become a monster," Zakku said, drinking his coffee. Shinji, however, was staring at Gendou's hands as a piece of the core was lowered. "He burned his hands opening a superheated entry plug with Rei in it just before you came," Zakku said, startling him. When Shinji looked at him, he had a grin that looked eerily like the one Gendou sometimes had.
"Bullshit! My father did that?" Shinji asked. "Yes, he did," Ritsuko said. "Hey, Ritsuko, why don't you come over to eat tonight?" Misato said, then looked at Zakku, "You can come, too." Zakku stared for a moment, a rather comic relief-like memory coming into his head. "Sure," he said, smiling.
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"I'll make dinner," Zakku said as he walked into the house. "What kind of host would I be if I let you cook?" Misato replied. "A very good one," he muttered in reply. "What was that?" she said, giving him a dirty look. "Nothing! Nothing at all! Hell, Pen Pen!" Zakku said, crouching down and hugging the warm-watered penguin, which looked rather scared in his arms. "You're such a cute little fella!" he said, squeezing Pen Pen tighter. "I think you'd better stop before you hurt him," Ritsuko said, tapping him on the shoulder. "Yes, mother!" Zakku sighed, then let go and walked to the couch, sitting in it. "Looks like my uncle's mother's place," he said, looking around, then saw Shinji's room. "Misato, you aren't molesting the poor kid, are you? 'Little Shin's Room'? It even has a little heart next to it!" he said, grinning.
"Yep! I just love my Shinji!" Misato said, wrapping her arms around the young Japanese boy. Zakku made a strange noise that sounded like a drunk sheep, shuddering. "You are a strange boy," Ritsuko said, sitting down on the couch, as far away from his end as possible. "Zakku, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH SHOES ON IN MY HOUSE!?" Misato yelled. "Eh?" Zakku said, then looked down at his feet, which still had shoes on them (In Japan, not taking your shoes off before entering a home is extremely rude), "Sorry!" With that, he took off his shoes and ran over to the door, putting them by everyone else's. "Not used to Japanese culture yet. Still trying to get the girls at school to stop bowing so I can't see down their shirts," he said. "You really look down their shirts!?" Ritsuko said, sounding slightly angry. "It's not my fault they don't button their blouses.... yes, I looked the first couple of times. I'm a guy, so sue me!" he said, sighing as he sat down on the floor with his legs crossed.
"Didn't you say you were going to make dinner?" Misato said, looking down at him. "Oh, right!" Zakku said, getting up and walking into the kitchen. "I'll help," Shinji said, walking after him. "That boy is like a cross between an evil Shinji and a good Gendou," Misato said, sighing. "Shinji being evil is rather hard to imagine, but a good Gendou isn't," Ritsuko said, although she mumbled the last part. "DAMN IT! WHAT'S WITH ALL THIS INSTANT CRAP!?" Zakku's voice bellowed. "Okay, he doesn't act like Kaji," Misato said, sounding irritated, "If you don't like the food I have you can eat somewhere else!" Soft grumbling was heard, accompanied with a few swears in English.
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"Booya! Two dishes of curry!" Zakku said, placing them down in front of the girls. "Why two? We only needed one," Ritsuko asked. "Well, I've never really had Japanese food before, so I figured I'd make a spicy kind incase I don't like the regular curry!" he said, sitting down. "I'm guessing you don't know how to use chopsticks, then?" Misato asked, grinning as she played with her chopsticks. "Haha, very funny! If I need hand-eye coordination, I've got my video games, thanks!" he replied, then started serving everyone as Shinji sat down. "It looks pretty good for your first Japanese dish," Ritsuko said, starting to eat a small bit, "Hey, it's not bad." Misato picked up her bowl just as she was about to be served, revealing some sort of instant ramen. "Slop some that stuff on top of this!" she said.
"Ugh.... how can you eat that stuff?" Zakku said, sitting down and starting to struggle with picking the food up with his chopsticks. "The trick is to stir it up until it becomes a sort of the sludge. It's yummy to the max!" Misato said, eating the ramen. "Right... Anyway," Zakku said, eating some of the curry, "Little bland, don'tcha think?" Shinji shook his head, then went for seconds. Out of the wrong bowl. Unfortunately, he didn't notice until-- "WATER! I NEED WATER!" he said, running into the kitchen. "Milk works better! Water will just make it hotter!" Zakku yelled after him, then got started on his spicy dish."Hey, Zakku? Do me a favor and give Rei her ID card tomorrow," Ritsuko said, handing it to him. "Eh?" he said, a memory floating to the top of his head, making him spit his curry back into the bowl, "NO WAY!" The girls raised a brow at him. "Aw, I think he's afraid of Rei!" Misato said, slightly drunk.
"Give you afraid, Ms. Hangover! Give me the fuggin' ID!" Zakku said, grabbing it from Ritsuko. He suddenly stopped halfway through withdrawing his arm when memories flashed in front of his eyes. He was standing in what looked like a garden. Walking through it, Zakku stopped when he spotted two figures. "It's good to see you again, brother!" Adam said. Lilith walked up to him, hugging him, "It's been too long!" Zakku came to while lying on the floor, the ID card in hand. "Zakku! Wake up! Are you alright?" Shinji asked. "He'll be fine. He just blacked out for a minute," Ritsuko said, then leaned over him, "Can you see alright?" Zakku made a motion for them to go, "I can see down your shirt, so obviously. Please move." Ritsuko gave him a dirty look as she sat up straight, "You really are a pervert. That's one of the few things Misato was right about."
Misato was passed out on the floor, drunk. "Figures!" Zakku said, trying to lift her up, "Shinji, a little help would be appreciated in the effort to move her into her bedroom!" Shinji didn't move. "I'll help," Ritsuko said, lifting Misato up by her ankles. "You're rather weak for an angel," she said. "You can always move her on your own," Zakku said as they walked into the bedroom, laying Misato down on her bed. "I need to run some tests on you tomorrow, also," Ritsuko said. "Fine. I'm leaving. Thanks for dinner Shinji!" Zakku said, running to the door and getting his shoes on, then leaving. "Why do I get the feeling he's avoiding us?" Shinji asked. "Because he is," Ritsuko said, looking at the closed door.
IDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOM (the next day)
"Rei? Hello?" Zakku said, walking into her home. "Holy shit, it's even dirtier than I remember it being!" he said, walking towards the bedroom. "Rei? Where aaaare youuuu?" he said, then stopped when he saw blood everywhere, "Holy shit!" There was blood on her pillows, her sheets, her clothes, baskets' worth of bandages and on top of her endtable were Gendo's glasses. "I swear if I end up like Shinji I'll kill myself," he muttered, putting the glasses on, which fit perfectly. "It's like when I didn't wear my glasses when I had to," he said, then turned around as he heard the shower turn off. Standing there, in the nude, was Rei. "Every tried clothes?" Zakku asked. "What are you doing with the commander's glasses on? Give them back," Rei said, taking them off his face.
"I was sent to give you yo-- FUCK!" Zakku yelled in English, slipping and hitting his head on the edge of the table as he fell on top of Rei. Thankfully, he didn't land in the embarrassing position that Shinji had; his arms were conveniently placed on either side of her. "Here is your ID card," he said, pulling it out of his back pocket and dropping it, then leaping forward like a cat, only bringing himself to his feet. "Thank you," Rei said, getting dressed. "Why do you fight, Rei?" Zakku asked, leaning on the wall. There was no answer, or none that he heard. The memories came flooding again. "Why do you continue to serve him so blindly?" Lucifer asked as he passed by him. Lucifer had just been judged for rebelling against Him. "I don't have free will, like you and Tabris. Believe me, if there was any other way, I would go by it," he replied. "What would you fight for with that freedom?" Lucifer asked. "I don't know what's worth fighting for," Zakku replied.
"Duarte, are you alright?" Rei asked, looking down at him, the usual blank expression on her face. Zakku opened his eyes, "I'm going to go crazy before the 10th if this keeps up.... yeah, I'm all right." Rei walked out of the house without saying a word. "I still don't know what's worth fighting for," he muttered quietly, then got up and left the house. By the time he was at his motorcycle, Rei was almost a block away. Starting the bike, Zakku rode alongside her, "Get on. It's faster!" Rei looked at him for a moment, then climbed in. "Hang on to your skirt!" Zakku roared, speeding off like a maniac.
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"Start the test!" Gendou said. "Starting test!" Maya sounded. Screens of statistics opened up. "All nerve connections stable!" Shigeru said. "All wave patterns green!" Maya said, "0.5 to borderline. 0.4....0.3....0.2...0.1.... Borderline crossed!" Gendou looked down at the young boy standing at his side. "Do you know when the next angel is coming?" he asked. "You know there's no cheating on a test. Besides, I'm not your pawn, I'm the player sitting across from you, remember?" Zakku said, then sighed, "But I suppose I can tell you my next move. It's supposed to arrive within the next few minutes. Of course, with my appearance, the times may have been altered."
"The activation test is successful! Prepare Unit-01 for launch!" Gendou said. "No, don't. If Ramiel appears, I'll take care of him myself," Zakku said, then walked out of the room, heading to the outside of the base. Hours passed, but Ramiel didn't come. "I guess it's time to head ho--" Zakku started, memories flashing again before him. "You keep doing what I tell you not to do, Humanis! You cannot block a whip with your sword or you take the risk of losing your weapons. Dodge it! Don't flinch!" Shamshiel said, unraveling his whip from around the double-edged sword. It was atleast three times Zakku's size, but he was still forced to use it. "Are you ready for another try?" Shamshiel asked. "Yes, big brother!" Zakku said cheerfully.
The memories faded. "I think I need more sleep," he said, walking to his motorcycle.
IDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOMIDIDYOURMOM (Today)
"Wait for me!" Avira shouted, hugging Zakku. "Annoying bitch," Zakku said, sticking his tongue out at her. "We'll never have kids if I decide to cut off your nuts," she said in an angry tone. "You wouldn't dare!" Zakku said nervously as he carried her, almost piggy-back style, to the teleporter. "Oh really? Where's a combat knife when you need one?" Avira said, kissing him on the cheek. "Send us down," he said to the operator at the terminal. "Yes, sir!" he replied. The teleporter glowed and Zakku and Avira shot downwards, looking like small laser beams, returning to their normal forms once they hit the ground. They always landed just outside Tokyo-03, a couple of miles off the road. "Man, I hate that! Makes me feel numb!" Zakku complained. A third laser dropped down behind them, Castilla forming from it. "What are you two doing down here?" she asked, her voice rather cold.
"Castilla! Hey! ...Don't attack me!" Zakku shouted, flinching as she moved her hand forward. "Much as I dislike you, you're still a person. I have to show some respect," she said, taking his hand and shaking it. "Jee, that makes me feel SO much better about myself!" Zakku said, shaking her hand before withdrawing it. "Why are you here, anyway? Need baby supplies?" Avira asked. "Yes. Robert and I ran out of diapers. I suppose you will be needing baby supplies soon. I heard about the two of you," Castilla said, smiling. "W-who told you!?" Zakku said, his face practically bleeding with embarrassment. "I was just down the hall when she said something about taking a pregnancy test. Not that hard to figure out who would do it," Castilla said. "Well, yeah... I was going to stop by a pharmacy or something along the way," Avira said, fumbling with her skirt. "You haven't grown at all within a year. I have to admit I like the dresses you wear, though!" Zakku said, hugging her, then looking down, "Ever considered a breast reduction?"
"Stupid jerk!" Avira yelled, slapping him. "Ow! Damn it, woman! It was a joke! Although, you'd be a lot better off if you did," Zakku said, then covered his head as she went to slap him again. "STUPID STUPID STUPID PERVERTED JERK!" Avira said, then kicked him in the shin with her high heels, causing her to fall over. Zakku helped her up, which earned him a slap. Castilla laughed, "Lord help me if my kids are like you two!" Zakku sighed, "Alright, well we gotta go get a pregnancy... thingy, then go on our date." Castilla raised a brow, "Alright, but like Ian says, 'Keep it PG-13!'. We wouldn't want the baby to get hurt." With that said, she pushed a button on her wrist communicator. A laser came down, a Honda appearing when it hit the ground, the model unknown to Zakku. The only thing he DID know was that it was purple. "Well? Get the bike!" Avira said. Zakku pushed a button on his own communicator. His motorcycle, along with the sidecart (with the same paintjob), appeared before them.
"Alright, time to get in!" Zakku yelled, putting on his jacket and helmet. "Don't drive like an idiot this time!" Avira said, trying to fix her dress, which was black with white lining and trim, along with a hat to cover her ears. She got in the cart, then screamed as they darted off. "Those two may be adults legally, but they're still kids," Castilla said, sighing as she got into her car.
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"Now that we've bought the test thing, can WE PLEASE LEAVE!? I hate pharmacies. The employees are always slacking off," Zakku said, getting on his motorcycle. People were staring at him, but he didn't really care. "Shout it to the whole world, why don't you?" Avira said, then started grumbling. "Alright! Off to the movies!" Zakku said, then started his insane driving again. "I'm going to kill you!" Avira screamed. "I don't HAVE to take you on a date, you know!" Zakku said, slowing down as he saw a movie theatre. Leaving the jacket and helmet in a compartment underneath the seat of the sidecart, they approached the theatre. "Stupid wind. If it keeps blowing like this my hat's going to fly off," Avira said. "And I grow angel wings every 6 hours. Don't worry about it," Zakku said, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.
Avira stopped when she saw the posters. "I want to see this one!" Avira said, pointing at a poster of a horror movie. "Fine. Let's go!" Zakku said, dragging her towards the ticket booth.
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"I'm going to have nightmares for the rest of the month because of that," Avira said, slightly freaked out still. "Hence why I don't watch horror movies often," Zakku said, finishing his soda and tossing it into the trash bin. "And now we're going somewhere romantic, right? Zack? What's wrong?" Avira asked as Zakku fell over. "Wake up, hun. This isn't funny. Wake up!" Avira said, shaking him. "Somebody call an ambulance!" a man shouted. Within minutes, an ambulance came and picked him up, Avira riding in the back with him. "Are you his friend or family?" one of the medics asked. "I'm his girlfriend," she replied, watching Zakku carefully.
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"What the fuck is going on!? Can't you people leave me the hell alone!?" Zakku yelled as the other Angels appeared. "We are here to let you know of your restrictions. First, you do not have free will. Second, you cannot ingest alcohol. Third, you will soon lose your gender. Fou--" Gaghiel started. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'LOSE YOUR GENDER'!? God's going to come and take away my dick!?" Zakku yelled in anger. "Angels are not allowed to have gender, among other things," Tabris said, sounding irritated. "What the fuck!? Almisael's a girl and Tabris has a dong! Why can't I have gender!? Fuck your God! Give me back my humanity, damn it!" Zakku yelled, grabbing the merperson. "You no longer have free will. You will have to test the humans. You cannot have alcohol. It is an addictive substance and therefore sacriligious (correct me if I'm wrong on that). You may not have gender. It will interfere with duties," Sandalphon said.
"Fuck you! Give me my humanity back! Give all this angelic crap to someone else! I want my free will, I want my god damned alcohol AND I WANT MY DICK BACK, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!" Zakku said, throwing Gaghiel into Sandalphon. "You are not able to make that cho--" Arael started. "Actually, he can. He was human at first. God cannot interfere with free will," Tabris said. "Haha! Bitches! Now give me my fucking humanity!" Zakku said before hugging Tabris. "...Fine. You will be human once again. You will no longer have the benefits nor the restrictions of an Angel. Your choice cannot be undone," Israfel said. "Thank God. And fuck you. Now let me wake up already!" Zakku said, waving them away. All of them left, save Tabris.
"What do you want?" Zakku asked, looking at him. "I just wanted to congratulate you on your decision. You gave up power and eternal life to have your own free will. I was created with that, but I can imagine how hard it must be to lose it. I suppose one day we will have to fight, seeing as how you are still fighting alongside the Lilims," Tabris said. "Probably. But everyone has a duty that gives their life purpose. Mine is to protect the people I love, even if it means fighting alongside those I hate," Zakku said. "Then we'll meet again some day. By the way, Ramiel will be testing you soon, so be prepared!" Tabris said, then disappeared. Zakku opened his eyes and sat up, looking around the hospital room.
"Zack! You're awake!" Avira squealed, hugging him. "Excuse me for a moment," Zakku said, prying her off, then looking down at a certain area, "YES! I DIDN'T LOSE IT! THANK GOD!" Anba covered her ears, "Stop shouting. You're giving me a headache." Ian grinned as he punched the boy in his shoulder, "You had us scared! Now what didn't you lose?" Zakku sighed, "The Angels have been talking to me for the past couple of days. This time, they told me I couldn't have free will, drink alcohol, or have a gender, so I told them to give me back my humanity and HERE WE ARE!" Robert grunted in annoyance, "We could have used it for information." Zakku glared at him, "And it would only cost my sanity, making any statements I made untrustworthy." Robert shut his mouth, plain and simple.
"Well, Mr. Duarte, there seems to be nothing wrong... with.... you?!" The doctor said, then stared at Avira, who's hat had fallen off when she hugged Zakku. "Get him out of here!" Zakku yelled. The others shoved the doctor out. "Here's some fatigues! Put them on!" Ian said, tossing him military fatigues to him while Robert held the door closed. "Fine, but don't blame me if you see my privates!" Zakku said, quickly getting dressed in a record of 40 seconds, not including the boots. "Alright, let's go!" Robert said, opening the door. Zakku finished tying his boots, then dragged Avira out of the room, leaving the hat there. "Security! Stop them!" a nurse shouted. A security guard ran in front of them, drawing his Glock. Ian tore his strange shotgun out from under his pant leg, cocking it. He fired a shot of a misty white liquid at the guard, freezing him.
"DID YOU JUST HIT HIM WITH LIQUID NITROGEN!?" Zakku said, staring at the frozen body. "That doesn't last too long, now move!" Ian yelled, dragging him away. They kept running until they came to the stairs (are you REALLY going to wait for the elevator?), then went down to the first floor. By now, a large group of security guards had gathered at the main entrance. As soon as they hit the bottom of the steps, Lucius and Yuko were waiting for them. "So you found him. He looks pretty cute in fatigues... don't give me that look! You look at girls all the time!" Yuko said, adding the last part when Lucius' face turned into an annoyed one. "Spare me. Just don't kill anybody!" Zakku yelled, running right towards the guards. A nurse pushing a cart with food on it moved out of the way, forgetting the cart. As Zakku ran past it, Anba lifted her hand up, causing the cart to lift, then threw it into four of the guards.
"Outta my way!" Zakku said, using a cyclone kick to send a guard into the glass doors. Lucius clotheslined the remaining two, who were confused as to what was going on. The group ran by their bodies and outside, where Shade and Castilla were waiting in a grey van. "What are we now? The Trenchcoat Mafia?" Zakku said as he got into the back. "Shut up and let everyone else in!" Castilla yelled. As Robert shut the door to the somewhat cramped van, Shade finally spoke. "I suppose he's no longer an Angel, considering he'd have wings by now if he was," he said. "Yeah? Well I like my beer, my free will and ESPECIALLY having a dick, thank you very much!" Zakku said. "Calling all units, calling all units! There has been an assault in the main hospital, the suspects are driving a grey van!" a voice said over the obviously stolen police radio. "Great! Just great! Now we're criminals!" Zakku groaned.
"It's my fault. Stupid cat ears," Avira said, her ears flattening out. "Oh don't get all angst on me. It's not your fault," Zakku said, scratching her behind the ears, which made her purr. "Don't start getting romantic in here," Ian said. "So, when is the next Angel attacking?" Shade asked, making a sharp turn as the police finally made an appearance. "Ramiel's going to be here pretty soon. I don't know exactly when," Zakku said, then yelling profanities as he hit his head on the side of the van as they hit a bump. "I think now would be a good time to change it back to it's original form," Yuko said, looking through the small window in the back of the van. "Robert, man the rocket launcher. Amber, Lucius I want you two to man the machine guns," Shade said, pushing a button. A white line flashed over the van, showing it was actually a rather large jeep, complete with two machine guns and a rocket launcher latched onto the back.
"How come nobody told me about this thing!?" Zakku yelled, as the jeep did not have a roof, making the wind loud. "We just developed it! You should see what else it can do!" Castilla yelled back. "Let me guess... it can fly?" Zakku asked. "Got it in one!" she replied, smiling back at him. "You leave my Zacky alone!" Avira said, latching onto him. "You're way too clingy. And you need a breast reduction," Zakku said, earning him a slap that could be heard even over the wind. A police car exploded as Lucius shot a police car in it's engine atleast four times. "I don't need Zack! I've got Robert!" Castilla yelled. "Hey, Shade! Can I drive?" Ian said. "Not in this lifetime!" Shade yelled, making a sharp right turn onto the highway. "What about my motorcycle?" Zakku yelled, struggling to be heard over the howling wind. "I can make you a new one!" Yuko yelled, then jumped as Robert finally launched a rocket, which was heard with a loud screeching.
"We're almost at the transportation point!" Shade yelled, then made a sharp right, smashing through the railing and continuing towards the edge of the highway, heading straight into the woods. "OH MY FUCKING GOD! YOU ARE ONE CRAZY BAAAASTAAAAARD!" Zakku screamed as the jeep flew off the highway, landing roughly as it swerved and bounced. "Help!" Anba screamed, half-hanging out of the jeep. Ian yanked her back in. "Alright! Hit it!" Yuko yelled. Shade pushed a button, causing everything to flash. They were once again on the Basroil. "Those cops were incompetent!" Ian said as he climbed out. "No chit-chat! Get straight to your rooms! You're going to need rest for tomorrow's training!" Shade said. Everyone groaned, but left for their rooms without another word. "Ahhh, memories..." Shade said after they left, grinning to himself.
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FINALLY! I'M DONE! I got a new mouse! *dances like Micheal Jackson* Anyway, DON'T REVIEW UNLESS YOU CAN NAME ONE GOOD THING AND ONE BAD THING ABOUT THIS CHAPTER! IF YOU DON'T TELL ME ONE GOOD THING AND ONE BAD THING, I WILL FLAME YOU! Now go away so I can finish the next one!