One Piece Fan Fiction ❯ Sub vs. Dub ❯ Captain vs. Captain ( Chapter 4 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Sub vs. Dub
Now that we're almost done, we will now take you to our last two crew members, Usopp and Luffy.
Usopp simply looked around and stated, “All the pirates must have feared my entrance to the challenge because there's no one here.”
“That's very odd,” Luffy said, “And here I was so excited to fight a series of other pirates.”
“I was more than excited to fight them,” Usopp replied, “because I knew that their asses would be mine if they were to face me! Besides, if they really do want to fight, I can just tell them that I almost beat you up.”
Luffy laughed and retorted, “You couldn't even beat me after using up your entire arsenal! Although, you were under an injury, so that was impressive.”
As they walked along, someone was hiding behind a bush thinking to himself while trembling, `Sub me almost beat sub Luffy? Wow, I guess I am a powerful fighter. Why didn't Al Kahn make me a good fighter? Well, I'll show him! I'll capture these freaks against his wishes! He didn't want to use me because he had to go and make me the ultimate pansy! I'll show him what a real hero is!'
Chapter 4: Captains of the Grand Line
As the two walked along the path and searched for more opponents, Luffy looked up and exclaimed, “I can feel an enemy's presence from that way!” then pointed north.
Usopp glared and retorted, “How did you come up with that?”
“Don't you remember the old direction song?” Luffy replied then started to sing, “In the islands to the north, it is very hot. Pina purupuru, they're heads melt to the ground, and they're all idiots!”
“What did any of that have to do with finding opponents?” Usopp retorted.
Luffy scratched his head and stated, “Now that you mention it, that doesn't any sense, does it?”
“YOU REALIZE THAT NOW?” Usopp spat as he heard a noise.
Suddenly, to his shock, a man who looked just like him leapt out from behind a rock and pounded his cheek with a small hammer.
Usopp got up slowly and asked, “Who the hell are you and why do you look like me?”
The man cleared his throat and stated, “I am Captain Usopp and I command 8000 men!”
Usopp simply glared and retorted, “Okay, even if that was true, which I know it isn't since you're a copy of me, how is anyone going to take you seriously with that God-awful coward's voice?”
Usopp grimaced and spat, “I'm here to show my master that I am brave and strong by defeating the one who almost beat Luffy! See, Luffy, your kid-friendly clone was sent to kill you AND Usopp, but I decided to take a load off of his hands. That retard of a boss thinks that a long nose has to equal a bad character, so he cut out every moment of my life where I look good and gave me this horrible voice! If I kill you, he might change his mind!”
Usopp simply snickered. Dub Usopp stared in confusion as Usopp laughed really hard.
“You cannot defeat Captain Usopp!” he stated, “Considering that your boss made you weak, what chances do you have?”
“Shut up, pansy!” snapped a kid who looked just like Luffy.
Luffy gasped and shouted, “That must be my clone!”
“That's right,” replied Dub Luffy, “and I'm here to destroy you!”
Luffy and Usopp both covered their ears and spat, “YOU NEED A THROAT LOSYNGE!”
Luffy removed his hands from his ears and spat, “What kind of clone are you? You sound like a girl with a sore throat!”
With that, the two prepared their most common attack.
The two captains held their fists back and shouted, “Gomu-Gomu/ Gum-Gum Blast!”
Sad to say that, judging by that last quote, Dub Luffy made the first move and sent Luffy flying deep into the forest following suit to make sure his subbed self didn't escape.
Meanwhile, Usopp had started his fight. Usopp pulled out his slingshot and so did Dub Usopp. They both grimaced and shouted, “Deadly Technique/Secret Technique, EXPLODING STAR!”
Of course, Usopp was using a kick-ass new weapon he invented in Water 7, so his star was stronger and overpowered Dub Usopp's star by a long shot. With that, they each pulled out a 5 ton hammer and smacked each other on the head. Sadly, they merely rubbed their heads and neither passed out.
“It's time to get serious!” Usopp shouted as Dub Usopp stared in horror and he pulled out a weapon that Dub Usopp had never heard of. He fired a small ball of fire as it turned into a phoenix and shouted, “DEADLY TECHNIQUE FIREBIRD STAR!”
This caused Dub Usopp's body to burn up, but he wasn't done yet. He pulled out a bottle of… dare I say it… fish oil and threw it at the man who looked just like him.
Usopp tried to wipe it off and wined, “I'm covered in alcohol! Now he's going to burn me even more than I… wait…”
Then, he smelled his arm and exclaimed, “This is fish oil!”
“Of course,” Dub Usopp stated, “We can't us alcohol and let kids know that it's flammable, else kids may start drinking.”
“Yeah, and if they tasted one sip of it, they'd probably give up on it because of its strong taste,” Usopp replied. (At least that's the reason I don't drink alcohol)
“Shut up!” Dub Usopp spat, letting fly a `Hot Salsa Star' causing Usopp's body to burn up.
Usopp arose from the ashes with a ton of burn marks and spat, “You may have these abilities, but if all you've gotten up to is Arabasta, then you probably don't know of the following attacks I'm going to use!”
With that, he loaded his big slingshot with an array of stars and shouted, “DEADLY TECHNIQUE SHURIKEN STARS!”
This caused Dub Usopp to bleed as he was forced back. He growled and stated, “For your information, I DO have that attack because it's in the dubbed games!”
`What the hell is he talking about?' Usopp thought as Dub Usopp pulled out his own Shuriken Stars. Sad to say that, although it hurt like hell, Usopp didn't bleed, so he pulled out an all new super weapon and knocked out his dub self in an instant.
“See?” he stated, “I am the true Captain Usopp! I'm the manliest of men, not some fairy like you! I have the development, you don't!”
Meanwhile, Luffy hadn't landed a single punch or kick on his clone because his opponent only needed two syllables to name his attacks while Luffy had to state 5 syllables. Because of this, Luffy had already taken in 25 powerful blows, including Cannon.
Dub Luffy laughed and said, “Face it, your attacks take too long to say.”
Luffy gritted his teeth and spat, “Well, at least it sounds cooler than Gum-Gum and Devil Fruit sounds WAY better than Cursed Fruit!”
Then it hit Luffy. What if he just used the English word for Gomu? He put it to the test and shouted, “RUBBER PISTOL!”
This was apparently enough to finally deal a blow to his dubbed self. He then shot out his fists rapidly and shouted, “RUBBER GATTLING GUN!”
Then he started to unleash more attacks.
Dub Luffy coughed up a gallon of blood as he spat, “Your attack names suck and are way too violent for kids!”
“Shut up!” Luffy retorted, “Names like Blast, Rapid Fire, Fish Head and Double Barrel are crap!”
This burned up Dub Luffy as he called upon some kind of hidden strength and unleashed `Rapid Fire' thus dealing 50 blows to the subbed version of himself. Luffy rubbed it off and spat, “You're going to die at the hands of an attack that you probably haven't heard of, and it's called…”
With that, he placed his hand on the ground as energy filled his body and steam emitted from him. He held his arm out forward and said, “Gear Second.”
Dub Luffy scratched his forehead and asked, “What's Gear Second?”
“I knew you hadn't heard of it,” Luffy replied as he held his arms back and shouted, “Gomu-Gomu no… JET BAZOOKA!”
Dub Luffy had no time to react as a mass amount of energy emitted from Luffy's palms and sent the boy crashing through the trees.
With that, Luffy took a deep breath and headed back to Usopp. This was it. All the dubs had been dealt with and it was time for the interesting events to occur.