Pet Shop Of Horrors Fan Fiction ❯ Of Fowl and Furniture ❯ One-Shot

Title: Of Fowl and Furniture

Author: Kameko-chan

Pairings: none

Notes: The famous riddle is, of course, from Alice in Wonderland.

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One day, Count D looked up from his teacup and asked Detective Leon Orcot, quite calmly:

"Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Leon, not being well versed in neither riddles nor children's literature, replied with some rather offensive language and an inquiry as to why the Count would want to know the answer to such a silly query. But Count D, gaze straight and steady, simply asked again:

"Why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Leon Orcot departed soon afterwards, but the question still plagued him, and so he consulted his esteemed coworker, who seemed to know things that one wouldn't expect her to know. He asked:

"Jill, why is a raven like a writing desk?"

Leon received a response, and at tea the next afternoon proudly told D the answer he was given. The count smiled and shook his head in the negative, eyes twinkling at his dear detective's clever attempt. He told Leon to try again, then gently shooed him out of the shop.

Leon's boss called him into his office the next day, to chew him out for something or other. Leon was not really paying attention, as the riddle played on his mind. And so it was that in the middle of his rant, Leon asked:

"Chief, why is a raven like a writing desk?"

The chief answered in much the way Leon had when the question had been posed to him, but the answer he gave seemed as plausible as anything. Once again, that afternoon Detective Orcot sat down to tea with the Count, and once again he gave his response, and once again D shook his head and smiled secretively and shooed him out the door. One more time, he told him, and shut the door to the pet shop softly behind him.

If there was one thing Leon did not like, it was losing, and he especially disliked losing to Count D. So, Leon Orcot found the one person he knew who understood the way the Count's mind worked, and asked:

"Chris, why is a raven like a writing desk?"

And Chris, knowing exactly to what the riddle referred, also knew the proper answer.

Leon didn't even bother to wait for teatime; he barged into the pet shop the moment it opened and declared triumphantly:

"A raven is NOT like a writing desk."

Leon smirked. The unanswerable riddle was answered, and the answer was that there was NO answer.

Count D smiled his secretive smile, and this time he nodded in the affirmative. "That is correct, my dear detective. A raven is not like a writing desk. However," the smile deepened as his voice dropped to a whisper, "the raven loves the writing desk anyways."

Count D glided away, into the deep recesses of the pet shop, and Leon looked on, confused.

And so it was that the answer haunted him even more than the question had.

END