Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction / Big O Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Digimon Fan Fiction / Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction / Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Sailor Moon Fan Fiction / Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction ❯ ANIME DEATHMATCH!!! ❯ Introduction ( Prologue )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Starcatcher: Hello, I'm Starcatcher, the host of Anime Deathmatch(echo). Today, I'm going to explain some stuff and introduce some people who work here at Anime Deathmatch(echo). And if you don't recognize anyone here, don't be surprised. This show is really made up by me and my friends. I'm of course, the announcer here.

Vulpes: Don't forget me! I'm Vulpes, the loveable and beautiful co-host of Celebrity Deathmatch(echo).

Starcatcher: Wait a minute! This is ANIME Deathmatch(echo) not Celebrity Deatmatch(echo).

Vulpes: Sorry...But Anime Deathmatch(echo) and Celebrity Deathmatch(echo) are so similar.

Starcatcher: True, but in Anime Deathmatch(echo) it's the characters from TV shows, movies, video games, etc. that fight; not the actors.

Vulpes: COOL!!! You mean like N*SYNC and the Backstreet Boys?

Starcatcher: Uh...I don't know. We just show whatever our producer wants us to show.

Vulpes: Who is the guy, anyway?


Starcatcher: Anyway, like I said before, I'm the host and Vulpes is the co-host.

Vulpes: And we provide all of you sick morons with entertainment!


Starcatcher: Vulpes!!! Now look at what you've done!!!

Vulpes: (innocently and stupidly) What?

Starcatcher: Oi!!! Look, lets just hurry up and finish this before we get fired!

Vulpes: (stupidly) What? You mean we can get fired from Celebrity Deathmatch(echo)?

Starcatcher: It's not CELEBRITY Deathmatch(echo), it's ANIME DEATHMATCH(echo), and YES! We CAN get fired! Now can we PLEASE get on with the Anime Deathmatch(echo) Intro?

Vulpes: Sure...

Starcatcher: Anyway, like I mentioned earlier, we're not the only ones who work here at Anime--

Vulpes: THAT'S IT!!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! WHAT THE <BEEP> IS WITH THAT ECHO?!!!! ...Hey? Why did I get a beep for <BEEP>?

Starcatcher: The censors...they don't allow any cuss words before a fight.

Vulpes: Damn those <BEEP>-in censors...hey? How come I can say "damn?"

Starcatcher: It was in the Bible.

Vulpes: Stupid Bible...stupid censors!

Starcatcher: (sigh) Looks like I'll have to call Melvin...

Vulpes: WHO?!!!

Starcatcher: M-e-l-v-i-n! He's our mechanic/electrician/technician. He basically makes sure that all the machinery works right for the show.

Vulpes: Wait a minute! You mean MELVIN works here?!!! THE Melvin?!! That geek from Sailor Moon?

Melvin: (pops up) Hi, Vulpes! (Hearts in his eyes)

Starcatcher: Uh-huh. We hired him after Trunks quit. He's the one crewmember who was originally from an anime. And he works for free! Isn't that convenient?

Melvin: HEY! I'm only working for free because you threatened to make me fight some big, ugly, hairy guy that smells if I didn't!

Starcatcher: (smiling evilly) I did, didn't I?

Melvin: That AND the fact that now I get to be closer to my one true love...VULPES!!!


Starcatcher: Calm, down! Like I said before, he quit!

Vulpes: (whimpering) ...(sniff)...but-but why...?

Blade: (enters from door) Maybe he found out that YOU worked here...

Kat: (follows him) Don't be so cruel!

Starcatcher: Hey, Blade! Hey Kat!

Melvin: Don't worry, Vulpes...I'M still here!

Vulpes: (angrily) Don't touch me!

Kat: Hey, weren't you dating Molly?

Melvin: Molly? She started dating that looser, Trunks, from DBZ.


Kat: (sarcastically) Great job, Melvin! You just HAD to tell her, didn't you?

Melvin: What did I do?

Vulpes: *Sniff, sniff* What did I do to deserve this?

Starcatcher: Uh-oh...uh...I think that we might want to leave now!

Blade: Why?

Kat: Oh, no…

Vulpes: *sniff, sniff, sniff* Why? Why? *Boo-hoo*

Starcatcher: Don't say I didn't warn you! (Puts earplugs in her ears, then follows by putting on earmuffs)

Kat: I'm with you! (Does the same as Starcatcher except she adds a layer of cotton balls between the earplugs and the earmuffs.)

Blade: I'm confused…

Melvin: Me too…


Blade: (now covers his ears) Dang! That's worse then Serena, Rini, Baby-Trunks, AND Togepi put together!!!

Melvin: I think she busted my eardrums!

Starcatcher: Well, I DID warn you!


Starcatcher: Man! Even WITH the earplugs AND earmuffs, I'm STILL getting a headache!!! Anyone have any aspirin?

Blade: No... but I have a pacifier.

Kat: GIMME!!! (Shoves pacifier in Vulpes's mouth)

Vulpes: <suck, suck>

Blade: Whew! That shut her up!

Kat: Yeah...hey? Wait a minute! What were YOU doing with a pacifier, Blade?

Blade: Are you kidding? With people like her, I always carry one around for emergencies!

Kat: Good point.

Melvin: Hello? Hello? I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING!!! I'M DEAF!!! AAAAAAAH!!!

Kat: Do you have one for him, too?

Blade: Unfortunately, no.

Starcatcher: MELVIN!!! Take those aspirin out of your ears!!!

Melvin: Huh? (Removes the aspirin from ears) Oh, thank goodness! I thought I was deaf!

Starcatcher: Anyway, Melvin, can you fix whatever's wrong?

Melvin: What's wrong?

Starcatcher: Watch! Anime Deathmatch(echo). See? Whenever anyone says it, there's an echo!

Kat: Maybe 'cause it's the title?

Starcatcher: It's only supposed to do that at the beginning and end of each show!

Melvin: Maybe it has a screw loose...

Blade: Maybe YOU have a screw loose!

Melvin: HEY!!!!!

Starcatcher: Oh, brother!

Sparky: Yes?

Melvin: (looking up) There's your problem. There's someone caught in the wires!

Starcatcher: Huh? (Looks up) SPARKY?!!! What're YOU doing here?



Sparky: Aw...come on! It wasn't THAT bad!

Starcatcher: You're right! It was worse!

Sparky: You're so MEAN!!!

Starcatcher: Can you blame me? (Sigh) That's Sparky, my brother. He doesn't work here, but he keeps trying to take over my position as the announcer of Anime Deathmatch!

Sparky: Match, match, match...

Starcatcher: WHAT?!! So it was YOU making the echo!

Sparky: Of course! Who else WOULD it be?

Melvin: Well, there's your problem.

Kat: We could already SEE that, Melvin!

Sparky: (noticing Vulpes) Aww...what a cute yet stupid and annoying baby…

Vulpes: (angrily) <suck, suck>


Blade: You know you CAN take the pacifier out anytime now, Vulpes!

Sparky: No! Leave her that way!

Kat: Why?

Sparky: This gives her a better chance of getting a boy to like her!

Vulpes: (takes pacifier out) Really?

Sparky: of the boys from the Looney bin that is! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! (Shoves pacifier back into Vulpes's mouth)

Starcatcher: WOULD YOU KNOCK IT OFF?!! Those jokes aren't funny! They're just stupid!!!

Blade: Hey! Aren't you going to tell the audience who WE are? (Gestures to himself and Kat.)

Starcatcher: Oh, yeah! That's right! Everyone meet Kat and Blade. Kat is a security guard.

Kat: (Smiles) And I do a good job too!

Blade: What about me?!

Starcatcher: Sorry…that's Blade...our Janitor.


Starcatcher: Well, you were...but Andy wanted to be in the show, and the best job I could give him was the referee.

Kat: Andy? I've never heard of him...tell us about him!

Blade: Yes-s-s-s...tell us about this...Andy person, Starcatcher...SO I CAN CHOP OFF HIS HEAD!!!

Sparky: Geez! Relax! Take a chill pill or something!

Blade: SHUUUUUT UUUUUUUUUP!!! (Punches Sparky) Ahem...what about Andy?

Vulpes: (has hearts in eyes) <suck, suck>

Starcatcher:! He's NOTHING like that!

Kat: Whoa! You mean that you can understand her even though she's sucking on a pacifier?

Starcatcher: Yeah.

Blade: But how? I don't understand her even when she DOESN'T have a pacifier in her mouth!

Vulpes: (angrily) <suck, suck, suck>

Starcatcher: Puh-lease! Anyone can understand what she means!

Sparky: But the question is: do we want to?

Blade: How can anyone understand what VULPES is thinking?

Starcatcher: By looking at the thought bubble above her head, DUH!

(Everyone looks up to see a bubble above Vulpes's head showing a handsome boy. Then Sparky pulls out a pin and pops it, bringing Vulpes out of her fantasy.)

Vulpes: (spits pacifier out) HEY!!!

Blade: (still angry) I still can't believe that you gave him MY job.

Starcatcher: I didn't have much of a choice...

????: Why don't you just admit that I'm cooler, smarter, better-looking, and not a loser like you are, Retard!!!

Kat: Who's that?

Blade: He has an even worse attitude than Sparky!

Sparky: HEY!!!

(A blond headed boy enters the room...I'm not gonna describe him because even the nastiest word known to man is a compliment compared to him...that and the fact that just seeing him, much less talking to him, will give you nightmares!!!)

Starcatcher: (sigh) Guys...THAT'S Andy...

Vulpes: Eeeew!

Kat: The horror…*gasp* the HORROR!

Blade: (stares wide-eyed at Andy) Uh-um...Starcatcher? Can I talk to you for a moment?

(Starcatcher and Blade move a little away from the group, so they can talk in whispers at least without Andy overhearing them.)

Blade: Now let me get this fire ME and give MY job to HIM?!! ARE YOU NUTS?!!

Starcatcher: Like I said before, I had NO CHOICE!!! His uncle is the producer, not to mention our ONLY sponsor! I HAD to make him referee!

Blade: Why? So we still get paid and the show goes on the air for letting that scumbag be a stage hog and a total jerk, running the scene?

Starcatcher: No, because as a referee, he has more of a chance of getting hurt and dying every episode.

Blade: (confused) But you said that his uncle's the producer AND our sponsor--

Starcatcher: --AND he pays us extra for killing Andy every Kenny from South Park! Besides, his uncle hates him…everyone does…

Blade: (smiling evilly) Oh...I see...

Starcatcher: Which was why I made him the referee.

Blade: But why make me a janitor? Why not make me a security guard?

Starcatcher: FINE! You can be a security guard!

(They rejoin the others.)

Andy: ...And that means I'M in charge, so all of you have to do WHATEVER I say!

Starcatcher: Well, Andy. It seems you've met the gang, but there's still someone I want to introduce you to.

Andy: Who?

Starcatcher: Big Burtha.

Andy: Big Burtha...? Who's that?

Starcatcher: Blade's mallet!

(And with that, Blade swings his mallet, hitting Andy like a baseball and knocking him through the wall.)

Blade: He shoots! He scores!!! AND THE CROWD GOES WILD!!!


Starcatcher: WOO-HOO!!!

Vulpes: You don't like him very much, do you?


Vulpes: I didn't think so...

Starcatcher: Hmmm... (Sweetly) Blade? Can I borrow your mallet to kill Sparky with?

Sparky: (scared) Oh, my! Look at the time! I have to meet Greg at McDonalds! Bye! (Leaves)

Vulpes: O-o-o-oh! Greg?! As in THE Greg from Sailor Moon! WAIT FOR ME!!! (Leaves)

Kat: I'm coming too! (Leaves)

Melvin: Then...that leaves me...all alone...with Starcatcher...AAAAAAAAAAH!!! (Runs through wall)

Starcatcher: Oh, well...I guess that leaves me to end the show...

Blade: Hey! Don't forget about ME!!! And now that the others are gone, I'M NOW IN CHARGE!!! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! YOU CAN'T BEAT ME!!!

Starcatcher: Oh, puh-lease Blade! You can never beat my trump card...BEHOLD!!! THE CREDITS!!! (Credits begin to role.)



Starcatcher: I hate it when they do that...I'll have to get someone to come in and fill those holes…oh, well...I'm your host, Starcatcher, the last still-sane person standing here at Anime Deathmatch(echo)! Good night, everybody!!!


Well? What do you think? If I get a lot of good reviews, I'll write more. If there are any specific fights you would like to see, LET ME KNOW!!! I'll be happy to hear your suggestions! And of course, I don't own any anime featured. The only characters that are mine are Starcatcher (That's me!), Vulpes (the co-host), Blade (the former janitor, but I made him a security guard), Kat (a security guard), Sparky (my evil brother that keeps trying to annoy me and take over the studio), and Andy (our referee).

Please note that this is just the intro explaining the characters and a little bit about the show. The real fights will begin with the next chapter! So if you want to see any fights at all, YOU HAD BETTER SEND IN REVIEWS!!!