Sorcerer Stabber Orphen Fan Fiction ❯ Orphen Bloopers ❯ The Sword of Baltanders ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Disclaimer: I do not own Sorcerer Stabber Orphen or any of its characters.

Also, these outtakes are based on the Dubbed version, so if you've only watched it Subtitled, some things will seem different.

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*Cleao, after having been swimming in the lake, comes out of the lake looking very graceful* Look! I'm a mermaid! *The camera crew facefaults*

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*Orphen is about to demonstrate a spell for his apprentice Majic with a glass bottle sitting on a rock wall*

<Orphen> Let's play "Spin the Bottle"!

<Majic> Uh...that's not really my kind of game, Master...

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*Same scene*

<Orphen> Let's play "Spin the Bottle"!

*The spell goes off and causes the bottle to fly right into Orphen hitting him on the head.*

<Orphen> See, Majic...nothing to it... *collapses*

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*Cleao is riding home in a horse-drawn carriage*

<Cleao> Can't that horse go any faster? I said, "Faster, driver!"

*The carriage crashes and Cleao goes flying out the back*

<Driver> I told her not to sit so close to the back....

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*Inside the tavern run by Majic's father*

<Majic's dad> You've been in Totokata for one year and haven't done one lick of work! You sleep late, then you eat, then you go for a walk, then you come back to eat, and it's back to bed! Doing some work, now that would be a real magic trick!

<Orphen> Ah, come on, old man. Haven't you heard? We sorcerers are notoriously lazy.

<Dad> Yeah, and next you'll tell me all sorcerers dress like motorcycle punks like you.

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*Mirabella spots Orphen looking at her from the tree outside her home and blushes*

<Mirabella> I really need to renew that restraining order on him...

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*Cleao runs outside with a sword after spotting Orphen "peeking" at her*

<Cleao> You've taken your last peep there, Tommy Boy!

<Orphen> Look, honey. Why don't you put down the sword before somebody gets hurt?

<Cleao> Uh, hello! Haven't you been paying attention? I am gonna hurt someone and I'm talking to him!

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*Volcan, with nothing but a bucket on his head and a mop as a sword, runs out to help Cleao*

<Volcan> Come on, Fancy Pants! Me and my mop are gonna wipe the floor with you!

<Orphen> Oh, just that bad joke is reason enough for me to blow you up!

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*Volcan and Dortin are blasted skyward by Orphen's spell*

<V & D> Team Volcan's blasting off agaaaaaaaaain!

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*Cleao's disappointed that Orphen's the guy she was watching at the beginning of the episode*

<Cleao> It was just that you looked so romantic standing on that tower, cape flowing, with the moon glowing behind you. But you turned out to be an immoral magician with bad fashion sense.

<Orphen> Hey! You try to find someone else who can pull off this look as well as me! Besides, I'm not the one wearing pink shoes with a blue dress!

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*Orphen is about to confront the Bloody August*

<Orphen> I've waited for you all this time! Five years since I left the Tower of Fang! Five long years I've searched for you!

<Bloody August> Yeah, you suck at hide n' seek!

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Well, hope you liked them! I'll be doing the rest of the episodes over time, so I hope you'll leave reviews.