Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Oh, the Tasty Randomness! ❯ Walkin' Down the Street, I Met a Guy With No Pants.... ( Chapter 2 )

Fuumi: I thank ye, for the review! ^_^ Are we all having a wonderful evening?

Yugi: No.

Fuumi: Why?

Yugi: Joey gets to be in Malik's pants, but I dooooon't!

Fuumi: >.>;;; Um... and you want to? WAIT!!! WHAT AM I SAYING?!?! *conks herself out with Joey's koala plushie*

Joey: Koala-chan!!! *huggles plushie, then disappears back into Malik's pants*

Malik: ¬.¬;; As long as he doesn't leave crumbs, I'm happy...

Disclaimer Man: Let's all cheer for the fact that Fuumi Megumi doesn't own any of these characters, otherwise, she wouldn't have released them to the public! *bows and gets hit by an angry samurai's tutu* X_X;;;

~*~*~

Oh, The Tasty Randomness!

Ch.2 - Walking Down The Street, I Met A Guy With No Pants...

~story so far... um, Tea is captured by mega-hottie Marron Glace and yet, no one seems to care~

Tea: Save meeee!

Yami: Why won't anyone tell me who Diddly is?

MalMal: Hey, Joey, want a chimmy chunga?

Joey: *comes out of Seto's magical cape of wonder and fantasy* Sure! *grabs the chimmy chunga*

Seto: Can everyone please stop popping out of random objects?!

Marron: Mwahaha!

Yugi: Can I have a chimmy chunga, Mal-sama?

Malmal: Oh yeah. *hands him a chimmy chunga*

Yugi: Yay!

Yami: Okay... first it was some guy named Diddly... now it's Chimmy Chungas?!

Ryou: Who's Diddly?

Everyone else except Yami: Yeah... who's Diddly?

Yami: What? But... but...! GAAAAAH! *sends Tea to the Shadow Realm* There! Now no more Tea! Can we pleeeeeeaaaase get back to chimmy chungas and Diddly?

Marron: No! You've destroyed my ploy and the only idea the authoress has for a plot!!!

*sound of wall breaking*

Yugi: GASP! You've broken the fourth wall!!!

Marron: I must take my leave. Fare thee well! *hops into an inflatable gerbil and disappears*

*sound of sirens*

Yami: Now what...?

Voice in a megaphone: Put your monster-dueling hands up!

Duelists((umm... that's pretty much everyone...)): *put hands up*

Voice in a megaphone: Now lay on the ground!

Duelists: *lie down*

Seto: *muttering* This is brand new carpeting...

Voice in a megaphone: Great. Now twirl yourself around.

Joey: *jumps out of Ryou's pants* What's this got to do with anything?!

Voice in a megaphone: *ahem* WHO's the one with a MEGAPHONE?! Hm? Hm?! Me! That's who!

Joey: .....

Ryou: Excuse me, Joey, but WHAT were you doing in my pants?

Joey: And why are you even asking me that question?

Ryou: ... good point.

Voice in a megaphone: Okay! Enough blahblah-ing! We are the Otogi Law Enforcers! Also known as... Ole!

Yami: Ole.... Wait a sec, Otogi?!

Otogi: *comes prancing out of the megaphone* That's right, girlfriend! Tsk, what an UGLY hairstyle! Me and my Ole buddies are gonna have to make you over! *snaps fingers* Ole!

Ole group members: *come running down and carry Yami out the door while Queer Eye for the Straight Guy((I don't own this!)) music plays*

Yami: NO! I'm already gay! Stop! I'm gay, but I don't want to be effeminate! Are you aware of how HARD it is to find a gay guy that actually acts like a GUY?!

Malik: *wipes a tear from his eye* Yes.

Otogi: Mwahahaha! You shall never see him again!!! Ta ta! *frolics away*

Yugi: My yami...

Bakura: Why haven't I said ANYTHING in this chapter yet?!

*another wall breaks*

Ryou: Now we're down to only having two walls!

Tristan: Yay! Now for this chapter's one line! *cough* What happens when we run out of walls?

Isis: *comes back out of Seto's glitter-happy coat, holding a customer information sign* I'll tell you! As long as someone pays me a quarter.

Seto: Why do people keep coming out of other people's belongings?! And why do we have to pay YOU a QUARTER?!

Isis: Well, I've got a question for the ages right here, Mr. Kaiba... why are you complaining over a quarter when you're worth at least two billion?!?!

Yugi: We must know! *pays Isis a quarter*

Isis: Ooh, shiny... *puts quarter in Seto's pocket-that-is-dangerously-close-to-everyone's-"precious"((umm, if you got that... I'm sorry if you're a Yami/Ryou/Bakura/any other bishi fan))*

Malik: Well...?

Isis: Hm? Oh yeah!!! Uh, what was the question again?

Everyone else: -_-0

~elsewhere, on Gay Street~

Otogi: How does it feel to be beautiful, Yami? *holds a mirror up to Yami's face*

Yami: *dressed in whatever you think the ugliest piece of women's clothing is* I already was beautiful! Have you not SEEN my killer legions of amorous fangirls?! Now look what you've done to me!!!

Otogi: Yes well... I USED to have killer legions of amorous fangirls... until you came along with your d-d-d-d-d-duels and your t-t-t-t-t-tight, leather pants! And now, I am loved by very few....

Yami: What a sad, pitiful story... what's even sadder is that I DON'T CARE!!! Now change me BACK!!!

Otogi: Gimme one good reason why I should let you out of those clothes!

Yami: Simple. *kick-starts a random boombox*

*I'm Too Sexy song starts playing*

Otogi: O_o;;;

Yami: I'm too sexy for these clothes... that's why.

~back at Seto's fairy-land house filled with inter-dimensional space portals and various other dueling paraphernalia~

Isis: As you can see from this detailed diagram I've drawn up on Shadi's face, if you really believe in magic, only YOU can prevent forest fires.

Bakura: ... all you pointed to on Shadi's face the whole time was a badly-drawn mustache and a uni-brow.

Isis: Do you defy the floss?! Start matching your lipstick to your neighbor's house plants! Who's got the button? Oh, whooooo's got the button?

Shadi: In my monotone voice, I can clearly say, supercalifragilisticespialidocious.

MalMal: *crying in the corner* What a moving speech, Shadi. You should win more academy awards... *sniff* *sob*

Shadi: *looking at a suntan lotion bottle* Let go of that tiny, topless girl's speedo, you ravenous dog, you. ((I think she really IS topless... as far as I remember anyway....))

Yugi: *somehow got the gist of the fourth-wall-talk* So... if we break anymore walls... our fangirls will be able to reach us?!

Malik: Woo-hoo!

Everyone else: *glares at Malik*

Malik: I mean... um, Radammit!

Mai: *in a deep, manly DBZ voice* Will we ever learn the true horror of the wall-breakage? What in the world is Yami wearing?! And how DO they write on those tiny slips of paper on the Hershey's Kisses? Find out never, on the next chapter of... Oh, The Tasty Randomness!

~*~*~

Fuumi: Lalalalalaaaa...

Yugi: Every author has a yami you know.

Fuumi: Not madyamisam((whom I don't own, but you should read her works anyway))! She's got a hikari!

Yugi: And you?

Fuumi: I have but a tastier version of the name Megumi...

Seto: Hm, reminds me of the baloney-episode of Zim.

Fuumi: I guess I can have a yami...

Yami: GREAT! *walks over really, really fast* I'm the expert on yamis! My fic name IS Yami, after all! So, what'll she look like? And how will you acquire her?

Fuumi: Him.

Yami: Right... wait..... what?! Have you no sense on how this yami thing works?!?! You're a girl, so you have to have a GIRL yami!

Fuumi: No I don't.

Yami: Yesss... you dooooo.....

Fuumi: Nooooo, I dooooon't.

Yami: What gives you reason to think you can have a guy yami?!

Fuumi: Ryou has a guy yami.

~the mall~

Ryou: *trying on skirts at Limited Too* *sneezes* I think someone's talking about me....

Bakura: Oh shush and give me some lovin'!

~back at... wherever~

Joey: *pops out of Yami's hair* Ryou's not a girl.

Seto: Not as far as YOU know.... *tosses some tapes into the trash*

Fuumi: -.-0 Why does it seem that Joey has the amazing ability to appear wherever he wishes?

Joey: Hello! Ever heard of a car?! Sheesh! *jumps into the trash can that Seto has recently thrown some tapes into* Hey, tapes! Hmm... "The Amazing World of Ryou's Pants"...... "Life With Ryou's Boxers".... and "Someone's in Ryou's Pants with Seto." Wow, what classics...

Everyone else: O____O;;; *backs away from the trash can*

Yami: So, if you did have a guy yami... what would he look like?

Fuumi: You're... actually gonna ask me that question...?

Yami: -_-0 Let's just go with some random guy and just give you the choice of how you meet him.

Fuumi: Uhh... items are so common and yet... no. I won't use an item! But if anyone asks, um... I have the power of the SenYen Nokia-cellphone! I wuuuuv my phone-y! *huggles phone* It's got a happy ring tone! ^_^

Yami: -_-0 Sooooo, what's his name?

Fuumi: Uhh....

Yami: Well...?

Fuumi: Lemme think....

Seto: And while she's thinking, allow me to entertain you with a joke I've heard!((I'll be making this up as I go along...)) *ahem* What did the bishounen say to the bishoujo?

Yugi: ... what?

Seto: "You may be a senshi, but I get to jump!" Hahahaha ((Yeah.... I told you I was making this up as I go along....))

Audience: Boooooooooo!!!

Seto: Ehe.... here, how many Maliks does it take to screw in a light bulb?((this woulda been a sexual joke, but I couldn't finish the thought...))

Yugi: *about to fall asleep* w-..... wha......t....? Zzzzzzzzzzzz.....

Seto: Zero! He can get his mind slaves to do it for him! Hahahahaha!!!

Audience: BOOOOO!!!

Seto: Um, what's two plus two?

Yugi: *drooling on the floor* ....blah.... my ninja monkey....... BAAAAH!

Seto: Uh.... boom?

Audience: O_O

*a cricket is about to chirp, but it doesn't because this scene isn't even worthy of it*

Fuumi: *lightbulb pops up, which Malik takes to see if what Seto said is true* I know what his name could be!!!

Yami: Well, don't tell me!!!

Fuumi: Why not?

Yami: *devious smile* First, you have to recite the official yami-getting ritual-speech-talk!

Fuumi: ¬.¬;;; What?

Yami: Repeat after me... I so solemnly swear

Fuumi: Blah blah, duel monsters...

Yami: *confused* Um, that I will help

Fuumi: I must d-d-d-d-duel...

Yami: *getting annoyed* And forever serve-

Fuumi: Bladdity bladdity yap-yap...

Yami: My yami-

Fuumi: Pecans rock...

Yami: Insert name here.

Fuumi: Kinu Liefan!!! ((pronounced kee-nuu leef-en))

Yami: Liefan....?!

Fuumi: Liefan!!! ((no, he's not named after any certain real person... I just made up the last name now while looking in the dictionary. ^_^ look up lief! My dictionary here says that the third whatever is "dear; beloved; treasured" which I'm sure all people think of their yamis, or hikaris, as)) So... where is he?

~back at the mall~

Ryou: How about this skirt? *suddenly, someone walks out of Bakura's pants* GASP! A GUY?!

Bakura: o_o;;; It's been a looooong time since someone's done this.

Kinu: Um, anyone know where a Miss- *checks card attached to his shirt* - Fuumi Megumi is?

Bakura: Why look for Megumi, when you can go on just living in my pants?

Ryou: No wait, live in my skirt!

Kinu: No, that's all right, I think I'll go ask someone else...

Ryou and Bakura: Wait!!!

Kinu: O___o;;;; Don't touch me!!!

~back at wherever Fuumi Megumi and Yami are~

Fuumi: Soooo?

Yami: I guess you sent the wrong address or something. Oh well. *dances off*

Fuumi: Wait! ... can I get a muse....? Hm.