Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ UPS vs FedEx ❯ UPS vs. FedEx ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Tsuki: This idle came from a friend of mine...she's scared of the Fed Ex and U.P.S. people due to a movie she saw. This is kinda like it and it's to be a one-shot humor. And because people I know was all like telling me to switch who I called who with the Malik/Marik-ness....I will starty calling my brother Malik and his yami Marik.

Bakura: Fed Ex...where did that come from agian?

Marik: I belive I saw you, Tsuki, cowering in fear from a Fe- *has Tsuki's hand over his mouth keeping him from contineuing*

Tsuki: Now now, that was only a dream. *hog ties Marik and Bakura* On with the one shot, someone do the Disclaimer.

Jessi: *pops out with anti-Fed Ex suit on* She dosen't own this so called YuGiOh anime show, the Idle, or any of the character's. If she owned Fed Ex or UPS I would die...>.> *dissapears*


- - - - - - - One shot - - - - - - -


It was a clam morning in Domino. In the household of the yami and hikari set Ryou and Bakura there was a loud thud heard. Ryou had fell and hurt his anckel while trying to fix the light fixture in the bathroom. Bakura had heard the thump and went to inspect his hikari, Ryou had a twisted anckel and wouldn't be able to got to work, at UPS.
"Yami could you please, please take my place at work?" Ryou begged his lazy yami. Bakura didn't want to do anything around the house or to help Ryou and himself keep the place they lived in, but after a while of begging from his weaker side he gave in and took Ryou's place.
"Fine! Grr,...just don't expect me to do this everyday for you." Bakura growled looking at his hikari who was sitting on the couch with his right foot on a pillow. Ryou nodded as for saying that he wouldn't ask his yami about that. Bakura growled as he went into his hikari's room and dressed in the UPS uniform. He said his goodbye with a growling attiude and left.

On the other side of town was the Ishtar's home. Malik and Marik were the only one's home at the time and Marik was getting dressed for his line of work today, being the Fed Ex guy. Marik hated the job but he and his hikari had to do something to earn money. Malik got to go into school with hope's to get into collage and Marik was stuck with being the Fed Ex guy. That morning Marik got the feeling that he needed to bring something...something important,...his paintball gun. He chuckeled evily as he ran out the door with the slightly heavy gun. He shoved it into the back of his truck as he drove off.

Bakura was already out on the way to delivering the boxes and small pakages that normally couldn't fit in a mailbox. He was already through one third of his job in the main town and was about to go along the edge of the devider for Fed Ex and UPS. Bakura was told, by anouther UPS worker to take a paintball gun or something that could teach one a lesson. He was told he would need it due to the UPS person on that side of town. Bakura grinned evily and loaded most of the truck with paintball's and the gun. As Bakura drove along the road he keept a lookout for the Fed Ex truck, in hope's to cause mayham. Spotting it's back he drove off and followed it to a stop. Pulling out the 'toy' gun he loaded it and shot at the driver in the truck ahead of him. His aim was off and it hit a women with blond hair, changeing it blue. He heard a psychotic laugh from the Fed Ex driver as he was hit in the face with a red paintball. Bakura growled as he went nut's hitting eveything around him.

Marik was about to get out of his truck to give a young blond her package when she was hit with a blue fliud. Marik unloaded his paintball gun and shot at the sliver haired person in the UPS truck after giveing out a psychotic laugh. He heared a rather loud growl as he was hit with about four paintball's. Green, orange, blue and black. It was in his hair and all over his face. He glared and shot all nutty like aswell hitting a young brunett girl with a rather good amount of paint. He started to laugh insanely as he aimed at houses and car's.

Bakura spotted the colorful Marik smirking and motioning him to aim at the houses. He watched as Marik hit a young girl and shot at her once or twice before hitting the door of the house she was running to. He then turned around and shot at the house to his left, the once white home now looked like a rainbow of skittle's. Stopping he walked over to Marik and shot him once before running off and shooting at random home's.

Marik was busy shooting at the home's of his customer's to notice Bakura come over to him, shoot him and run off. After a second or so he felt it hit him as he ran after Bakura shooting anything that moved.

The quiet little community that was once clean, was now a rainbow of color's. Their were blue dog's, pink people, orange bird's, green cat's, and purple car's. The houses that were white were now a rainbow mixture and the colored houses were a gaudy ugly color. People were afraid to come out of their home's as they watched Bakura and Marik run down the street.

Bakura now informed of Marik's chaseing after him, was now shooting at his right sholder. Marik had given off a colorful language as he tried to catch the former theif. Bakura had some green and red on him but to be truely honest, Bakura was unharmed. Marik on the other hand was a mess of blue, black, green, orange, red, pink, purple and aqua. Bakura turned around, still running and laughed at Marik. Marik took this chance to aim at Bakura's forehead and shot a... ... ... pink paintball at him. As it hit him Bakura was yelling about how Marik couldn't hit him.

"If I can't aim then, how did I do that?" Marik yelled as he laughed at the pink headed spirit. Bakura tired looking up at his forehead, tripping and then regaining composure he contineued to run. Bakura grumbled and looked over his shouder quickly shooting at Marik. It was a hit to his leg of red paint. Marik acted like he was shot and bleeding in hope's of the spirit haveing some kindness in his heart. Bakura looking back, stopped, shouted 'Yes.', danced like a goof and ran off not giveing in to Marik's act.

Marik glared as he got to his feet and ran after the thief yelling profanities. Parent's threw thing's at him but were hit with many paintball's. As Bakura came to a dead end he turned around shooting in hope's of scareing off Marik. Marik was hit eight time's before the 'click' of Bakura's gun came. No more paintball's. Marik grinned and walked up to Bakura, getting him once as his 'click' of empty-ness came. They blinked, looked at eachother and laughed evily.

"Well that was fun." Bakura managed to say between laughs. Marik nodded not being able to contain his laughter. Bakura looked over to Marik pulling out a small paintball pack tied up to a fuse with some gunpowder on it. Marik grinned with Bakura as they lit it and ran off to cover. After hearing a loud 'Boom!' they laughed as paint of all color's rained onto them and covered their hair and faces. Laughing they nodded saying they did their 'job'. They looked at each other and waved off going back to their truck's.

Bakura went to a carwash to clean off quickly and returned to the UPS company. They asked him if he ran into Fed Ex and he nodded laughing insanely.
"Well, did you take care of him?" Asked a worker (A/N: Let's call this dude... ... Bob.) Bob, the worker, looked on eagerly to hear from the rookie driver. Bakura stopped laughing and nodded.
"Let's just say it was a 'blast'." Bakura said smirking as he left for home. As he walked into his home he was greeted with his hikari's smile. He smiled back with an evil grin under it. Ryou sat up and waved his yami over to him. Bakura nodded and sat by Ryou.
"So, ... yami... how was your day? Did you enjoy the job?" Ryou asked looking up at Bakura with warm green eye's. Bakura looked at his hikari and snorted lightly.
"Never ask me to do that agian. It was a normal, boreing day." Bakura said hideing a grin and slightly stifeling a laugh with his hand. Ryou nodded think his yami had a lucky day.

Marik walked in the door to his home, sat on the chair and flipped on the T.V. to the new's. Malik walked in the room looking at his yami and fwaping him.
"No T.V. ... ... how was your day?" Malik started then changed like he had major mood swing's. Marik grunted and grinned.
"It was... ... normal." He said smirking at his thought of the pink headed thief. Malik nodded and walked back into the kitchen to finish dinner.


- - - - Owari - - - - -

Tsuki: >.>; I kinda don't know how the movie was so... ... that's just what came to mind on hearing the basic info. I would like to thank Jessi for telling me of this insane movie and giveing me this idle. I may have thought of the putting the YGO chara's. in it but this is my friend Jessi's idle so NO takeing. >.>; Jessi, what are you doing?

Jessi: Makeing this place Fed Ex and UPS proof. Who know when they could come with their gun's and stuff. *Is putting brick's on the window's and door's.*

Malik: *Look's at his Yami and Bakura shakeing his head.* Anyway's R&R please. Tsuki did try hard on this fic... ...even if it was... ... odd.

Everyone: *Is gone save for Jessi who is still covering thing's in brick's.*