Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction / InuYasha Fan Fiction / Fan Fiction / Gundam Wing Fan Fiction / Rurouni Kenshin Fan Fiction / Trigun Fan Fiction ❯ The Reel ❯ Ruruni Ken-shin? ( One-Shot )

The Kenshin Bloopers

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Scene: Aoshi's Fight with Kenshin in the Kanryuu mansion

Aoshi: KEN KAAA~~~~-*WHUMP*

*Aoshi trips on his coat and falls face down onto his nose*

Kenshin: oh shit! you okay?

Director: i told you to lose that dorky coat but oh nooooo "i want to be a cool bishounen" you said.

Aoshi: shaddup *clutches bleeding nose*

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Scene : Hiko's mountain shack, he and Kenshin enter after their first meeting in 15 years outside

*Hiko sits down on table*
*neat close up shot of Hiko*

Hiko: hmph, i never thought you'd come back to look for me af-

*table CREAK*
*table breaks completely*

*Hiko falls on his backside rather ungracefully. Legs stick out in a mess of pots and wood.*

Hiko: %@##$%^&*()&^%~!!!!!
Kenshin: ......(secretly laughing inside)
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Scene: outside Hiko's shack, he has just told Kenshin about the Ama Kakeru Ryu no Hirameki

Hiko: ..........
Kenshin: well? teach me!!!
Hiko: hm.......no, on second thought i'm too handsome to die. Sayonara SUCKER!! PWAAHAHHAHAHAH!*turns and walks off*
Kenshin: THAT'S NOT IN THE SCRIPT!!
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Scene: Hiko's Fight with Fuji. Hiko jumps off Fuji's big ass sword and gets ready to kick Fuji's ass.

Hiko: HITEN MITSURUGI RYUUUUU!!!!

*suddenly, wind direction changes, his cape that was flying gracefully behind him suddenly floops over his head*

Hiko: KUZU RYU SE-WHAT THE HELL? I CANT FREAKIN' SEE!!!

*in his frenzy to get the cape out of the way, Hiko crashes headlong into one of the buildings*

KKKRRRRBLANG CRASHACRASHCRASH

Oniwabanshu, Kaoru, Yahiko and Fuji: O_O;;;;;;;
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Scene: Sano's fight with Anji. It is time for the final climatic move.

Sano: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anji: GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

*as their fists meet for the climatic zoom in......*

Sano and Anji: STONE PAPER SCISSORSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!

Kenshin & Saitou: .......ah, so *this* is the secret move of the Futae no Kiwami .......
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Scene: Kenshin's final fight with Shishio. Battered Kenshin enters.

Kenshin: hm...*reaches foward and yanks HARD on one end of Shishio's bandages*
Kenshin: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

*Shishio starts pirouetting unstoppably*

Shishio: WTF? we're supposed to exchange philosopies an-urrghhh*puke*

*Yumi and Houji's muffled laughs can be heard in the background*
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Scene: Chou's first meeting with the Seikuu family at their house. He has Iori on his scabbard.

Chou: Observe!! *does his neat scabbard trick and flings Iori into the air hooked on the saya*

*Iori comes down. dramatic close up for the climatic sheathing of the blade*

*Chou misses and his sword slices right thru Iori. Lots of fake blood all around*

Chou: oops. sorry boss, looks like i missed.

Director: cut!! damn Chou, thats the 8th baby dummy u ruined this week!! we got a budget for those little buggers you know!!
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Scene: The temple where the last sword of Shakkuu is kept. Kenshin is standing waiting for Chou.

Chou: Who are you?

*Kenshin looks mean and rips off the plaster on his face to reveal a cross scar*

Kenshin: OUUUUUUCH!!!! ARRGHH what kind of plaster is this? Super Glue?

Chou: ewwww facial hair!!!!
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Scene: Battle with Chou. Chou unleashes his Hakujin no Tachi and waves it around.

Chou: HAHAHAHHAHAHA eat my "Orochi!"

*the Hakujin no Tachi waves around and chops off half of Chou's hair in the process*

Kenshin, Misao, Okina and Seikuu family keel over laughing at Chou's new hairstyle.
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Scene: Battle with Chou (take 2). Chou unleashes his Hakujin no Tachi and waves it around.

Chou: HAHAHAHHAHAHA eat my "Orochi!"

*the Hakujin no Tachi waves around and chops off Chou's pants in the process*

Misao and Asusa: AAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*more screaming*

Chou: uhm..woops. sorry girls. hehe *blush*
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Scene: After the fight with Chou and everyone is ooh and aahing at the new Sakabatou.

*Sakabatou hilt splits and cracks. Sakabatou blade falls towards the ground*

*Sakabatou blade misses ground and instead perforates straight through Kenshin's foot*

Kenshin: ORRRROOOOOOROROROOROOOO!!!!!!!*insert more agonious screaming*
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Scene: Kenshin's first battle with Enishi in the Kamiya Dojo. Kenshin and Enishi emit lots of ki. Dust flies around due to their awesome emitting of ki.

Enishi: hm.....so this is the Ba-ACHOOOOOH!!!

Saitou and Kenshin Gumi: O_O?

*Enishi starts sneezing until his eyes tear*

Enishi: ACHOO ACHOO ACHOO ACHOO*SNEEZE SNEEZE*damn this dust! damn you props peop-ACHOO!!
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Scene: Fight with Enishi at Kamiya Dojo. Enishi has just been Kuzu Ryu Sen-ed.

*Enishi emerges from the dust basically unharmed, grinning like the psycho he is*

Saitou, Kenshin gumi: O_O *stare at Enishi*

Enishi: hey! you're all supposed to look shocked!

Saitou: uhm, Enishi, you got lettuce stuck in your teeth.

*Megumi and Kaoru muffle a giggle*

Enishi: huh ? uh, sorry, i ate some sandwich just before shooting hehe *sheepish grin*
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Scene: Fight between Kenshin and Senkaku in Shingetsu. Kenshin has just pulled off his Ryu Shou Sen.

Kenshin: HITEN MITSURUGI RYU RYU SHOU SEEENN!!!!!

*Senkaku goes down. Kenshin lands gracefully*

*suddenly the floor gives way as Kenshin lands. 3/4 of Kenshin falls into the floor. He wiggles unsuccessfully to get out*

Kenshin: damn you props people! *wiggle*wiggle* giving us cheap hay matting!*WIGGLEWIGGLE*
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Scene: Outside Hiko's mountain shack, just after Kenshin receives word of his whereabouts and is
about to confront him.

*Kenshin emerges from bushes and swings his sword at Hiko sitting by the kiln*

*Hiko jumps up 30 feet into the air. as the camera shows this cool scene, something drops down*

Hiko: whoops there goes my shoe....

*Hiko lands with only one shoe. he looks profoundly amusing*

Director : can't you tie that thing on or something?
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Scene: Hiko's fight with Fuji. Hiko starts his arrogance streak about how unbeatable he is.

Hiko: standing before you here is a man you can never beat...because....

Hiko: *strikes pose* I AM THE TERROR THAT FLAPS IN THE NIGHT!! I AM THE WING THAT W-

Director: hey no Disney here ok? we're trying to keep this Aku-free for the censors.

Hiko: sorry . the cape was just too tempting.
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Scene: Hiko's Fight with Fuji.again.( lil_Jinx: damn i love making fun of this scene :P)

*Hiko blocks Fuji's sword just as it is about to come down onto Yahiko*

*instead of Hiko's theme song playing however, some funky techno music comes on*

Director: what the...sound dept ! what are you guys up to??

Hiko: (quickly) *sings* o/~I'M TOO SEXY FOR MY CAPE!!! too sexy for my boots! so sexy that it hurts! too sexy for my sword she's going to leave meee~~~!

*soon enough Yahiko and Okina join in to boogey with Hiko and entire set is in chaos*

Director: *pulls at his own hair*
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Scene: Hiko's fight with Fuji . Hiko is about Kuzu Ryu Sen Fuji into orbit.

*Hiko jumps off Fuji's big ass sword , his cape flying gracefully behind him*

Yahiko: It's a bird!

Okina: It's a plane!

Misao: No.....it's......MACHO-MAN!!!!!!

*supposed to be unconcious Kamatari and Henya start giggling uncontrorably*

*entire crew starts doubling over in guffaws*

Hiko: HITEN MITSU-heeheh-RUGI heheh RYUU KUZU RY-hehheh HAAHAHAHAHHA hahahaha

*Hiko loses his concentration and lands to laugh even harder*

Director: .........WOULD YOU GUYS QUIT WITH THE CAPE JOKES?????
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Scene: Eiji's forgotten village Shingetsu. Misao is about to be attacked by hoodlums when Saitou steps in.

*Saitou sticks his sword through the hoodlum's head and mouth. Hoodlum dies with lots of blood*

*Saitou shakes the corpse off his sword*

Saitou: ...THE HELL?*shakes more*This freakin' thing won't come off !!!*ShakesShakeShake*

*Saitou starts frustratingly flinging the corpse up and down, still stubbornly stuck on his sword*

Saitou: PIECE OF AKU CRAP GET OFF MY LUVLY SWORD DAMMIT!*SHAKEFLINGSHAKE*
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Scene: Aoshi's first meeting with Soujirou just after he has trashed the Abukuma Foursome

Soujirou: Wow, the Abukuma Foursome couldnt even do one move!

Aoshi: .........

Aoshi: .........................

Aoshi: ........................................................................... ..........................

Soujirou: (uhm...dude? i know your supposed to be all cold and gloomy but it's your line.)

Aoshi: i er....damn i have SO very forgotten my line. cant i have cue cards?
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Scene: Eiji's forgotten village. Kenshin is about to cut down the corpses of Eiji's parents.

Kenshin: *swing sword*

*Corpse drops down and lands right on top of Kenshin*

Kenshin: O_O!! ARRGHH BLOOD BLOOD NOOOOOOOooooooooooo!!!*faints*

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Scene: outside Hiko's shack (again). Hiko wants to pass his cape onto Kenshin.

Hiko: here, you earned it. put it on.

*they imagine Kenshin wearing cape*

Kenshin: no thanks, its not fitting for sessha...*starts walking away*

Hiko: you selfish thing!

*Hiko flings the cape at Kenshin with all his un-caped might*

*KRRRRBLOOOONNGGGG* Kenshin faints without a chance to even say oroo*

Director: cut! good gawd, is it so hard to follow the script Hiko?

Hiko: it was a reflexive twitch! look! my arm's twitching again!
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Scene: Yahiko's Face off with Fuji before Hiko appears...

Yahiko: Kenshin!

Yahiko: KENSH-! O______O

Oniwabanshu, Yahiko and Kaoru: O_O;;;;;;;*stare at Fuji *

Fuji: huh? it's your line Yahiko! what? why are you all.....?

Yahiko: uhm...Fuji , your fly is open O_O;;;

*Misao at this moment is half derilious mumbling something about " a giant hairy elephant the size of Aoiya " *

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Scene: Saitou's fight with Kenshin in the Kamiya dojo...

Saitou: You're fighting in vain ! my blade may have no name but it and my Gatotsu have served me well throughout the Bakam--...BAKUmatsu no douran.

*Saitou tries to act as if tho nothing has happened but Kenshin, Kaoru and Yahiko are having hard time muffling giggles and snorts *
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Scene: Misao's Canyon scene

Misao: I can never forget the one i love!

*Misao leaps across the canyon!*

*and .......falls right down*

Director : Kenshin! Earth to Kenshin! Don't just stand there! Save her
damn it!

Kenshin: oro? oh yea! yea...uhm...Kaooruu~~!!!!Sessha will save you
from Jin'E de gozaru yo!

*Director gives up and chugs down another mug of coffee while shouts of Kisama
ring out from below the canyon*
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Scene: Sano's Fight with Anji in the Juppon Gatana Lair

Sano: Anji , you never lea-

*THUMP*THUMP*THUMP*

*Yumi, Kenshin, Sano and Anji all turn to see Saitou hopping around on one foot*

Saitou: FOOGIN' piece *hop*hop*jump* of AKU crap!!! *shakes his leg*

*Saitou notices the entire set staring at him and stops*

Saitou: uhm....stone in my shoe....i thought i was off screen! *gives off his friendliest Fujita grin*

Director: ooohhhh no , you ain't giving me that Fujita crap, i'm cutting your pay by HALF! Dang it, that's the third time this week!
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Scene: When Kenshin is trying out his er...virgin Kuzu Ryu Sen

Kenshin: Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu KUZU RYU SEN!!!!!!!

*Kenshin misses Hiko completely and crashes right into a wall of pots*

Hiko: !!!!!!!! MY POTS! MY BABIES!!!! DAMN YOU! I'll *muted out* KILL YOU FOR THIS YOU BAKA *muted out*

Kenshin: oro~~...

Director: woa woa, people , people , calm down! we've got those pots under insurance!

Hiko: DON'T YOU ORO ME YOU F-

*some men in white come in and start dragging Hiko away, still screaming bloody murder*

Enishi: and i thought I was the crazy one *shakes head*

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*screen goes static, sounds of carnage and chaos in background along with yells of Kuzu Ryu Sen*

WE ARE CURRENTLY EXPERIENCING TECHNICAL DIFFCULTIES. PLEASE STAY TUNED WHILE OUR TECHNICIANS TRY THEIR BEST TO ABBREVIATE THE PROBLEM.

Owarii! Here a rose in thankx! (If you enjoyed this copy the rose, if you didn' NO STEALING!!)@---,--'--------- Thank You!!! @---,--'---------