Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction / Yu-Gi-Oh! Fan Fiction ❯ Writing Fanfiction For Dummies ❯ Chapter 1: The Horror! ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Writing Fanfiction For Dummies

BHS: ^^ This is, as the name implies, Drof's school of how to write fanfiction that doesn't suck. I've been reading lots of stuff on ff.net lately, and there's several `Insert Series-Name Here Schools Of Writing' and, quite frankly, it's a good idea. SO many people have no idea how to write!!! I mean, seriously!! It's, like, PAINFUL how many people there are writing who just CAN'T WRITE. And they think they can!!!

Drof: YOU ALL SUCK!! GET OFF THE SITE!!

BHS: *hits Drof.* Shut up!! SOME of you suck. This ficcy will fix that. Okay? It will HUMROUSLY point out several common mistakes of fanfic writers, and lay down the rules of grammar. Okay?

Drof: `Cause you all suck.

Disclaimer: Drof sucks. You all suck, too. Die. Oh, and we don't own anything.

Drof: OCS!! OCS!!

***

Chapter 1: The Horror!

Anna sat back and surveyed her screen, smiling with satisfaction. The disjointed, barely-legible string of garbled words was yet another part of her pride and joy—and also possibly the worst fanfic ever written.

“I'm so smart,” she crowed. “I bet no one ever though of putting Kurama-chan and Keiko together! It's so…so…so cool! Everyone's gonna love my wonderful fic!”

There was a sudden flash of light, a bang, and a puff of smoke. Anna screamed and dove under her desk. Coughing was heard, along with muttered obscenities and threats, both aimed towards the reason for the smoke.

Terrified, Anna peered out from under the desk at the two apparitions in her room.

One of them was a girl. She was very short, with shoulder-length brown hair and brown eyes. Her large, thick glasses were hanging off of one ear, and her clothing—a blue jacket, black tee-shirt, and black jeans—was covered in some sort of grey dust.

The other was a ball of light, which was also coughing.

Anna had never, ever seen a ball of light cough. She didn't think she could handle it, so she retreated even further under the desk. This didn't work, however, because the ball of light spotted her. It sprouted a hand, pointed at her, and began jabbering. The girl nodded, and the hand disappeared.

The very disheveled girl walked over to the desk and yanked the chair away, then glared down at Anna.

“Hi!” she said in a high-pitched, childish voice. She sounded very air-headed and rather blonde (and I'm not referring to her hair-color).”You, Anna, have been caught writing insufferably bad fanfiction! You are to be transported to Drof's School Of Non-Suckalicious Fanfiction to learn how to write fanfics, because the net must not be polluted with this drivel!!”

Anna stared, open-mouthed, at this girl. In all her sixteen years of life, she had never heard anyone spout so many multi-syllabic words in a sentence.

“Yeah, well…You're mean!” she retorted, chuckling mentally at her clever retort. The girl blinked, bit her lip, and turned away, shaking. Anna's green eyes grew wide, and she hurriedly put a hand on the girls' shoulder.

“Hey, don't cry!” she said. “I didn't mean to be so mean! I'm sorry!”

“You think she's crying?” the ball of light asked incredulously. It had a scornful, also-blonde voice. “She's laughing her ass off!”

Anna had never, ever, ever heard a ball of light speak. It was too much for her little mind. She stared blankly at the ball of light for a moment, and then keeled over in a dead-faint.

The girl observed her for a while, and then turned to the ball of light.

“That wasn't very nice,” she scolded. “Now we can't explain about the registration form.”

“Who cares?” the ball of light responded. “Just leave it here and give her a note to fill it out. C'mon, we hafta get back to Japan, there's some really icky people there.”

“Alright…” The girl and the ball of light both disappeared, in another flash of light and puff of smoke.

***

A Little Later

When Anna woke up, there was a piece of paper laying on her desk and a note that was supposed to say `Fill this out, okay?', but actually said something like `Fly fish trout, hooky!'.

After staring at this odd notice for a while, Anna decided to ignore it and just fill out the form. She was bored, and her inspiration for the pathetic drabble she called a `fic' was gone.

***

~Basics~

Name:

Gender:

Age:

Height:

Weight:

Species:

~Description~

Eye-color:

Hair-color:

Clothes:

Accessories:

General Appearance (a detailed description, please):

~Likes/Dislikes~

Favorite bishi(s):

Favorite character(s)*in a non-lust-object manner*:

Favorite food(s):

Favorite color(s):

Favorite country(ies):

Favorite season(s)

And anything else you care to add about what you like:

Least favorite bishi(s):

Least favorite character(s):

Least favorite food(s):

Least favorite color(s):

Least favorite country(ies):

Least favorite season(s):

And anything else you'd like to add about what you dislike:

~Fanfiction~

Anime you write about:

Book series you write about (if any):

TV show (not anime) you write about (if any):

Video/computer game you write about (if any):

Favorite hetero pairing(s) *if any*:

Favorite yaoi pairing(s) *if any*:

Favorite yuri pairing(s) *if any*:

Least favorite hetero pairing(s) *if any*:

Least favorite yaoi pairing(s) *if any*:

Least favorite yuri pairing(s) *if any*:

~Misc.~

Anything else you feel like adding:

***

That was what the form looked like. Anna read it over again, and blinked.

“Species?” she wondered. “That's stupid. Well, I guess I should fill it out…”

She did so. I'm not going to go into detail about how she did this, because that would take a really long time, and I don't wanna waste another three pages on the form. It'll show up next chappie.

After filling out the form, Anna tried to write, but she just couldn't. Sighing, she decided to go to bed.

“Poor readers,” she murmured to herself. “They won't get to read my wonderful fanfic…” With that, she drifted off to sleep.

***

Drof: Yeah, yeah, I know, it's short. Deal with it.

BHS: …You could be nicer.

Drof: No!! This fic is here to tell people how stupid they are!!!

BHS: …Review people, okay? If you want to be in this, fill out the form and email it to me at AKichi_chan@cliffhanger.com, okay? ^^ Chappie dedication goes to whoever guesses who the ball of light is. Now, review, or else. DON'T give me the form in a review, okay? I won't accept it. You'll be yelled at, in fact, in the next chappie. So just email it to me, okay? If you're in it, you'll be made fun of, so don't ask to be in it if you're sensitive. ^^ Review!!