Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Hiei n' Weed ❯ Hiei n' Weed: The Truce is Broken ( Chapter 4 )

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of it's characters, but for once can I please just

own Hiei? Even if it's for like 3 seconds? Please?

Note: This is Hiei's supply of weed. It's far more stronger than ours. So it really messes you up if you do way too much..

Ehem, Anyway, I'd like to thank Dragon Master Lytore and Onyx Sapphire for your input in this story.I based a couple things on their ideas. It'll really give it a twist as you'll see later on in the next chapter. Which by the way, it should kick some major ass, I promise! (you'll also note that I changed Yusuke's name from "Squaling Quail" to "Squatting Quail" only because it sounds funnier.)

*Star Wars music begins to play* *A black starry back round appears and gold letters begin to scroll up the screen and a deep voice narrates them*

We last left the team out in a brushy field area not too far from their school. As you already know, both Yusuke and Kurama joined both Kuwabara and Hiei in their state of highness. Yusuke, became a crazed Indian chief who called himself "Squatting Quail". Also, Kurama, (which I failed to mention [sorry] ) became a flower child/hippy who claimed that he was one with the flowers. Hiei now thinks that he is a descendent of the great legendary "Mexican Whooping Llama" and has now started making lays out of flowers for his little pink elephant friends. Kuwabara, was still talking with his little kitten friends. Unaware to us during this time, however, Kuwabara secretly became an American Armed Forces Commander, calling himself General Kazuma, who thought he had to fight in Vietnam and made his own Elite Kitten Army Force.

In time, as you know, both Kurama and Hiei formed a rivalry against eachother and fought over who the field of flowers rightfully belonged to. "Squatting Quail" saw this however and formed a truce between them by granting them each one half of the field; Kurama the east, and Hiei the west. All seemed well to the gang to resume to their ways in peace in prosperity… Or so they thought…

*the whole Star Wars thing ends and we join the team back where we last left them.*

*rustling of brush* Yusuke was running like the wind through the brush area to the field. "Something isn't right. I sense that this truce that I have made between them won't last. I must hurry to them before it's too late." He said to himself.

Meanwhile, Kurama who was now dressed entirely in flower printed hippy clothes, had made himself a rather large tower and was now painting the outside pink. "The flowers will sure dig this once I've finished it. I think I'll call it "The Flower Tower". And just by coincidence, Hiei's boom box started playing the song "Along the Watch Tower" by Jimi Hendrix. He looked out into the east only to see Kurama painting huge flowers on a large tower-like structure. Hiei disregarded his rival's doings and continued making flower lays. After making about 5 lays, he took a break to role himself a blunt. A small flame came out of the tip of his finger and with it he lighted the joint. He took a couple hits from it. "Why the hell does that ass insist on loving the flowers and being friends with them?" Hiei laughed and smiled widely for a moment. "It's not like they actually respect him back. I mean come on! If they were yelling and swearing at me, than they're most likely doing the same to him." He took another hit before he continued and then look over at his pink friends. "See, that's why I'm friends with you guys, because you understand and respect me." They all looked at him gratefully and smiled. Hiei then fell over and began to laugh uncontrollably for no apparent reason.

Yusuke finally found the field. Even though the area wasn't all that large. He saw Hiei rise up from the ground to continue making lays. "Maybe I should talk to him. He doesn't seem to understand nature's ways. If I teach him, maybe he will be more appreciative of the flowers." With that said, he approached Hiei, who was still laughing and smiling sheepishly. "Come with me Hiei. It is time that you understand and appreciate nature." Hiei lifted an eyebrow at him. "Hnn. What is so important about nature? It sure doesn't ever do anything nice for me." Squating Quail let out a small sigh. "Oh but it is. It's very important. Here, let me show you. He helped him up and led him into the brush he had just come out of.

*Pocahontas "Colors of the Wind" seem appears, only that Yusuke is Pocahontas and instead if John Smith, it's Hiei *

Yusuke:

You think you own whatever land you land on.

That the earth is just a dead thing you can claim.

But I know every rock and tree and creature,

Has a life, has a spirit, has a name.

You think the only people who are people

Are people who look and think like you.

But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger,

You'll learn things you never knew you never knew.

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?

Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grins?

Can you sing with all the voices of a mountain?

Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest.

Come taste the sun sweet berries of the earth.

Come roll in all the retches all around you.

And for once never wonder what their worth.

The rainstorm and the river are my brothers.

The heron and the otter are my friends.

And we are all connected to each other.

In a circle, in a hoop that never ends.

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon?

Or let the eagle tell you where he's been?

Can you sing with all the voices of the mountain?

Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

How high do sycamores grow?

If you cut them down, then you'll never know.

And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon.

For whether we are white or copper skinned.

We need to sing with all the voices of the mountain.

We need to paint with all the colors of the wind.

You can own this earth and still

It is only earth until

You can paint with all the colors

Of the wind.

*the seen fades and everything returns back to normal*

"Hn. Now I understand Squatting Quail. I understand everything." Said Hiei in a serious and reassuring tone of voice. "Very well then. I shall go on knowing that I have left you and this land in peace." They both walked back out into the field.

Meanwhile, Kurama had just completed his Flower Tower and was now listening to the flowers' thoughts on it. "Wow Kurama, it's beautiful!" said one of the smaller lavender periwinkles. "Nothing else in this whole field can beat this!" said a daisy. "You know what would be even nicer? Is if we make another tower just like it on the other side of the field." Suggested one of Kurama's roses. This rose had a tendency to start trouble and liked to too. "Hmm…" the other flowers thought to themselves for a moment. "Sounds like a good idea." Said one of the dandy lions. "Yeah, that's a great idea!" one of the taller daisies said aloud. "Wait." Kurama said startling the all flowers on his side. "What about the truce? Hiei and I both were given one side of the field by Squatting Quail, and we aren't to interfere with each other's sides." He continued.

"So what? Who cares about Hiei?! And who is Squatting Quail to tell us what we can and can not do?!" pointed out Kurama's rose. "Yeah!" shouted all the other flowers. "I'm not too sure about this. We'll probably get in big trouble for doing this. And besides, how would we build it there in the first place?" asked a rather nervous Kurama. "Duh! All we have to do is just take over his side. We'll take the offense before he get's a chance to." Replied the rose. "So, what d'ya say Kurama? Are you in?" asked the rose. "Well, ok fine. We'll do it, but we're going to need some help. Remember you guys are just small flowers, and even though I'm very strong, I won't be able to beat him. Especially since he has all of those pink elephants aiding him." Said Kurama. "You have a point there. However, I have solution." Replied the rose, looking over at Kuwabara, who was commanding his Elite Kitten Army right outside the field.

Meanwhile, "Hmm, even though I cleared up everything with Hiei, I still feel as though there is something wrong about all of this. I have a bad feeling about all of this." Thought a rather concerned Squatting Quail, who was now sitting high up in a tree over looking the field.

"Forward, March! Left, left, left, right left." Shouted General Kazuma. He continued to march them while saying his lefts, column lefts, rights, column rights, flanks, etc… "Hey! Kuwabara!" He turned his head to see who was shouting his name so rudely. It was Kurama and his evil rose ofcourse. "What do you want?!!" asked an angry General Kazuma. "I was wondering if you would be interested in a preposition." Replied Kurama. General Kazuma turned to face his battalion. "Battalion, Halt! Fall Out!" After giving out those commands, he turned back around to face Kurama and his rose. "So, what is this preposition you have for me?" he asked curiously. "Well, for you to help us fight against the west side and take it over." Kurama replied simply. "And what do I get in return if I do this?" asked a still suspicious General Kazuma. "Anything you want. Just name it and we'll see if we can do it." said the rose. "Ok, then in that case, I want you to build me a giant watch tower in the middle of the field." Said the general. "Um I dunno if tha-" the rose was cut off by Kurama. "Fine, it's a deal! Now let's start planning." Little did they know that Squatting Quail overheard this. "Oh no! I must inform the west side of this." He said as he began to run towards the other side.

Meanwhile, "So what do you think of this color?" asked Hiei. "It's excellent. I totally love how you mixed the blue, red, and yellow flowers together." Said one of the little pink elephants who was sitting by him. Hiei smiled warmly and giggled like a school girl. "Thank you." "So, how are your personal periwinkle lays coming along?" asked another pink elephant who was on his other side. "Pretty good actually. So far I've made a red one, a yellow one, and a blue one, that makes 5." He replied. "Um, 3 sir." Said one of the elephants that was behind him. "Oh." Said Hiei. "Oohhh…" said just about all of the elephants. Just then, Squatting Quail came flying out of the bushes. "Hiei, my friend, You are in grave danger!" he exclaimed. The others gasped. "What kind of danger?" asked Hiei curiously and concerned. "The east side is going to start a war against the west side to take it over. Kurama made a deal with General Kazuma to help them fight against you with his Elite Kitten Army Force. They are still planning right now as we speak. We don't have much time." Squatting Quail stated flatly. Everyone gasped even more so at this statement. Hiei became worried "*Gasp* This is horrible! Whatever shall we do?" "I am willing to help you fight against them. They are going to take the offense on us. The good news is that they don't know that we know. So let us get ready for this battle." Squatting Quail said. They began to make plan for the war. After each side was done they got ready.

"Battalion, attention!" Shouted General Kazuma, who was now dressed in all camouflage with an army helmet and face paint. The Elite Kitten Army Force was dressed just the same as him. "I don't want any screw ups! Only do what I command you to! Now are you ready to kick some ass?!!" he continued. "YES, GENERAL KAZUMA!" the kittens shouted. "Very good. Now fall out and go to your battle stations." Said the general. "This should be very interesting." Said the rose evilly. "Oh no! They're getting ready to fire Hiei." Said one of the pink elephants watching the east side in a near by tree. "Ok everyone, listen up!" shouted Hiei.

*plays the song Stop by Buffalo Spring Field*

Hiei:

There's something happening here.

What it is ain't exactly clear.

There's a man with a gun over there.

Telling me I've got to beware.

I think it's time we

Stop, Children. What's that sound?

Everybody look what going down.

Hiei was interrupted by gun shots being fired. "Hnn. They've started already?"
All of the elephants and Hiei now had Indian face paint and weapons. "Ready, aim, fire!" shouted Squatting Quail. They fire they're spears, arrows, etc… at the east. "FIRE DAMNIT!! I SAID FIRE!!!!" shouted General Kazuma. "Damn those Vietnamese to hell!! They're so damn short that I can't even aim right at them cause I can't see them!!!" he continued. "Fire the FLAME CATAPULT!!" shouted Squatting Quail. At that command, all of the pink elephants fired the catapults. "AHHHHH!" all of the flowers screamed along with the kittens as a dozen fire balls came flying onto the east side. This angered General Kazuma "GRRR! FIRE THE M60S!!!!!!!!!!" he shouted. And with that, the kittens got on their stools and fired the m60s. All of the pink elephants screamed as the bullets came flying towards their side. After each side ran out of bullets/fire balls, the east sides used grenade launchers and the west side used flaming arrows. Little by little, each side began to grow weaker and weaker. "What do we do? The Elite Kitten Army Force is growing weak." Kurama said to his rose. "Yeah, true, but so are the pink elephants." Replied the rose. "We can't keep this up for long. I'm going to have to use…" Kurama paused for a moment. "…My flower attack…" "No! You don't have to use that!" shouted the rose. "I'm afraid so my friend" said Kurama. To the west, the problem was the same.

"Hiei! The barricades are being knocked down and 2 of us as well." Yelled on of the little pink elephants. "K'so! So far we've lost Vincent, Gregory, and Eugene that's 5 gaurds!" "Um, 3 sir…" the elephant replied. Hiei paused for a moment before he continued. "I've had enough of Kurama and his stupid east side! They went to far and broke all the rules. Now it's time for me to step in." exclaimed Hiei. "B-But Hiei? Won't that just make things even worse?" asked one of his smaller friends. "Maybe, but they've left me with no choice." He replied as he started to walk toward the dividing line. "Hiei, wait!" yelled Squatting Quail.

*Pocahontas music to Listen With Your Heart comes on*

Yusuke:

Que Que Naturah

You will understand…

Listen with your heart

You will understand…

Let it break upon you like a wave upon the sand…

Listen with your heart

You will understand

*song ends*

"I will not fail you Yu- I mean Squatting Quail." Said Hiei. "Good, always remember that." Squatting Quail replied. Hiei ran to the division line. "Do you think he'll be alright?" asked a young little pink elephant. "He'll do just fine. I know it." said Squatting Quail. "Hey!! Kurama!! I've had enough of this nonsense! It's pay back time!!" Shouted Hiei as he began to power up. "Oh really? Then let's get this shit started you ass!!" said Kurama as he too began to power up. "Bring it on you skanky Bitch!!!" Hiei shouted back. "AIIIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYIYI!" he scream his Mexican Whooping Llama call as he unleashed his Black Dragon Attack. "Not so fast pal!!!FLOOOOOWER POOOOOWER!!!!!!

Kurama released his Rose Whip attack only this time tons of hippy flowers came shooting out when he released it. Hiei and Kurama kept struggling to gain control over each other's attack. In any other situation, Hiei would obviously have the upper hand with his attack, being that no ones ever technically survived it. However, note that in the beginning of the story it was mentioned that drugs make him a lot weaker than usual. So they both were equally matched in this case. The battle raged between them for a long time. Each side gave up fighting a long time ago, because they were all too weak. "You'll never win Hiei!!!" Kurama shouted. "Wanna bet?!!!" Hiei yelled back at him as he unleashed more energy. The insult and yelling went on for a while. Until suddenly… "What's that noise?" asked Squatting Quail. "Hey, I think I'm hearing music! Those damn Vietnamese have made me go insane!" General Kazuma yelled. Squatting Quail heard him. "No, your not. There is music, and I think it's coming from over there." He replied as he pointed toward a vehicle that was about 100ft away. They could hear the bass to the song "Hypnotize" by Notorious B.I.G. could be heard in the distance. It was a big black Escalade equipped with subwoofers and the works. The sound of it moving down through the field caused both Hiei and Kurama to stop fighting. "Who could that possibly be?" asked Kurama. "I don't know, I just don't know…" replied Hiei. All four of them were stunned at this resent discovery as they watched the vehicle get closer and closer.

Who could this person be? What do they have in store for the gang? Will the war ever end? Will

the rivalry between Hiei and Kurama diminish? Could things possibly get any crazier than they already are? Fine out next time on Hiei n' Weed!