Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction ❯ The Official Fanfiction University of Kanto ❯ The Worst Romance Fic Ever ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Disclaimer: I don't own Pokemon, and I don't own the idea for fanfiction universities. That honor goes to the wonderful Miss Cam!

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A dark-haired girl of around fourteen years of age dashed down the carpeted steps of her house, turned a corner and flung herself onto a chair directly in front of a computer, "Yes! Summer vacation! Celebrate good times, come on!" she sang to herself, and then opened up a Word document.

"Finally I can write my kawaii JAJL and AAML story!" she cackled gleefully, rubbing her hands together in anticipation.

'Ash nad Misti where waking donw a rode 1 day wen some thing teribel happened.Mysti wuz ataked bi butch and casedee frum TR!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111

"Were giong 2 kil u!!!!!!!!1111" sed casiday becuz shes evilllllll!!!!!!!!!!11 dont u jist HATE her?!?! LOL anyway…

"U wont kill er!!!!!11 Ill stop u!!!!111" sed Asg herically!!!!! He is tUh KoOl!!!!!!!111 I LUV HIM!!!!!!111 Anywho…'

The girl paused, unsure of what should come next, "I need inspiration," she muttered to herself, "Perhaps a break…"

Ten Pepsis, a barrel of Pixie Sticks, and exactly two and a half giant Kit-Kats later, she returned to the computer, laughing manically.

'LOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111 I jst took a brake frum het storie and I had sooooooooooooo muhc shooger I think I'm rellyrillylreally hypppppppperrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111111 and now I no wat 2 do next in tehe stoy!

"U wont b abl 2 stop us frum killig her!!!1" sed botch.

"Y r u gong 2 kil her?!?!" Ahs dimandid.

"beuz were evill nd we don't lyke u!!!1`1111" sed cassadee.

just then the other TR Jesy and Jmes came!!!!1

"Well stop u!!!!!1" sed James. He is TuH mAnLy LOL!@!!

but then caPPeday and Bootch got Jeskjdnjsadsakdsajka to!!!!111 (that is her ful nam incase u didn't know)

"Lets stop thm 2gether!!!!!11' sed Ash 2 Jams.

"Oky!!!11" James agreded.

and then the killed bitch and crappidy (LOL @ ther nmes! took me 4evr to cum up w/) and got Jassie and Msity bak!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111111

"Jessy I need to tel u somthign I luv u!!!!111" sed Jmes.

"and I luv u 2 jams!!!11" sez jEsSy and hety strted 2 MAKEOUT!!!!!1111 EEEEEEE!!!! KAWAII!!!!!!!!

then ash and mitsi sed the same ting 2 eachother & also began makeingout!!!!!!!!!!11111111



"Sweet success," breathed the girl softly, "Now I'm going to post this on fanfiction.net and get myself a lot of lovely reviews. Then maybe I can flame some of that sick Palletshipping crap…" she mused.

"You won't even be posting that monstrosity, let alone flaming hapless Palletshippers," came a voice that the girl couldn't remember ever hearing before

"Who's there?!" she squealed, holding an empty can of Pepsi to her chest fearfully.

"Prepare for trouble," said a new voice.

"And make it double," said the one who'd spoken before.

Two people stepped into the girl's field of vision; there was a female wearing a Jessie and James-style Team Rocket uniform, except for the fact that the 'R' had been replaced with a 'OF'. Then there was a male wearing mostly the same thing (minus the miniskirt and plus pants of course), though the letters on his shirt said 'UK'.

"Team Rocket…?" asked the girl, hardly believing. These people didn't look anything like her beloved Jessie and James, but they dressed like them, which was good enough for her.

"Not quite," said the male, "but you'll find out who we are soon."

"To protect the world from badly written fanfiction," said the female with flare.

"To stop all of those scarily obsessed fangirl vixens," continued the male.

"To denounce the evils of Mary-Sues and OOC romance…"

"To give all the sucky writers a reforming chance…"



"That's not the name of Wild West outlaw! That's another name for Santa Claus!" the girl protested loudly.

"You try finding two people with names that go together somehow. It's not that easy. Now shut up and listen!" snapped Kris. After a moment of silence, she continued with their motto, "Team OFUK, giving your writing some much needed critique!"

"Come to the university or you'll never be able to write fanfics again, you freak," finished Kringle.

"…Interesting motto…" said the girl, her eyebrows raised.

Kris walked over to the computer, and quickly skimmed over the 'kawaii' romance fic that the girl had written earlier, "Interesting story," she retorted.

The girl immediately smiled, "I know. Isn't it terrific?"

"Only if you mean terrific in an extremely sarcastic sense," said Kris, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Anyway," said Kringle, "Are you…Tara-Sue Jenkins?" he asked. He did a double take and looked back at her name, "Tara-Sue?"

"Just because my parents are a bit on the hillbilly-ish side of things…" Tara-Sue broke off, staring at the ground, embarrassed. Abruptly, she raised her head again, "And it's just Tara, if you will. Now what's wrong with my masterpiece?!"

"To put it blatantly…" Kringle seemed lost for words.

"You are the biggest dunderhead of all time when it comes to writing," Kris supplied.

Kringle nodded, "Yeah, that sounds about right."

"Well that's just your opinion, and I don't listen to uh…" now it was Tara who was at loss for words. Unfortunately, she found them several seconds later, "big, mean, poo-poo heads like you! My mum said I'm special!"

"I bet Hitler's mum said he was special too…" muttered Kringle.

"To get to the point," said Kris, before Tara could throw a fit, "we work for The Official Fanfiction University of Kanto, or OFUK."

"Nice acronym," said Tara sarcastically.

Kris didn't hear her, or at least pretended not to, "And since you've got such sad, sad writing you need to come to this university and complete three semesters before you are deemed safe to write again."

"And if I don't?" Tara challenged, hands on her hips.

"Didn't you listen to the motto?" grumbled Kringle, irritated.

"Not very closely…I was thinking about what nice abs James has…" said Tara dreamily, "I mean, you came in wearing a uniform like his and it just got me to thinking…" her eyes glazed over and a bit of drool hung from her mouth.

"You can never write fanfiction again if you don't meet the required standards! And if you don't go, you certainly can't meet them, you know," said Kringle.

"Who's going to force me to stop writing, huh?" said Tara, feeling superior.

Kris simply looked up at the sky, "Them," she answered simply.

"Who?" asked Tara, her eyebrows creasing.

"We don't speak their names…for they are too horrible to be uttered in the common tongue or the…er…non-common tongue," said Kringle.

"Whatever. I'm going to bed, as this is obviously a nightmare. Goodbye," stated Tara, beginning to walk to the stairs.

"You get to be taught by the cast of Pokemon!" yelled Kris after her retreating figure.

Tara suddenly turned around, "Forget what I said about a nightmare, and sign me up now!" she demanded, her eyes shining.

"Just fill out the paperwork, pack, and our people will see you at 6 AM sharp tomorrow morning," with that, they sent out a customary Team Rocket smoke bomb, and were gone.

Tara coughed, brushing the away from her, "But wait…who's giving me this paper-"

She was cut-off by the timely arrival of a sheet of paper floating down towards her.

"Convenient," she said appreciatively, catching it with one hand.

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Yeah, I know it was a bit short, but that was just a prologue of sorts ^^. Stay 'tooned.