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"THE LENGENDARY TEAM UP" Reviews/Comments [ 3 ]
 Title: Ignore the review by Sarah-chan
Reviewed By: Bliksem [MediaMiner Member]  On: March 21, 2006 04:39 CST
That's completely improper. While I applaude you for being brave enough to attempt to write a fanfiction, I'm afraid there's just not enough material here to garner an audience. I would suggest writing out two to three chapters to get a decent plot underway. These chapters should be at least 3 MSWord pages long; that gives you enough material to work with. Remember that Capitalization should only be used at the beginning of sentences and for Proper Nouns. Redo this work and I'll be happy to review it.
 Title: What in God's name IS this crap?!
Reviewed By: Sarah-chan [MediaMiner Member]  On: March 11, 2006 23:15 CST
Woah... Just what in the hell was that? Somebody needs to take a friggin' writing class for heaven's sake! First of all, learn to use some punctuation, you n00b! You need to have quotation marks where there is dialogue, use periods at the end of sentences and you need to learn to use some fucking commas. They were put on your keyboard for a reason! Obviously you don't know what they are or that they even exist for that matter. Secondly, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS LIKE THIS! IT'S REALLY ANNOYING AND IT LOOKS UGLY, SO DON'T DO IT! USE BOLD OR ITALICS! ONLY USE THIS IF YOU WANT YOUR FICTION TO LOOK IDIOTIC BY YELLING AT YOUR AUDIENCE! (That's if you actually had an audience) Third, get yourself a god forsaken dictionary! It's spelled legendary, not "LENGENDARY" and Raikou is spelled with an "O" AND a "U". Check your fucking spelling before you submit anything! Quote: "NOTE: THIS STORY MIGHT CHANGE BUT THE STORY WILL KEEP GETTING LONGER CAUSE EVERYTIME I UPDATE THE PARAGRAPHS FROM BEFORE WILL SHOW UP IN THE NEXT CHAPTER" -You No. Just no. You don't do that. That's what the hell chapters are for! You start off with a new page of "paragraphs" called chapters. If novels, like Harry Potter for instance, were written your way, you would need one long sheet of paper to write it out. The "book" would have one page, one chapter and would stretch out for nearly a mile! Final comments: I have never seen a more poorly written "fan fiction". There are just too many n00bish mistakes; I don't have the time to sit here all night and point them out for an imbecile like you. I have much better things to do than waste my time here on your sorry excuse for a piece of literature. Also, I didn't use the rating system for this review, in case you didn't notice. (Which you probably didn't considering your lack of a brain) The numbers don't go into the negatives, if they did, then I could properly rate this. But since, it's not in the ratings, I will type it for you. Your rating is: -251649893549 PS: Don't even bother emailing me telling me what a bitch I am. I don't read spam. (which is what your "message" would most likely be) So, if I get an email that says something along the lines of "ZOMG YOU R A MEANIE BITCH PERSON", don't expect a reply. Ever. ~Sarah-chan~
 Title: Yer kiddin...
Reviewed By: Konosuke [MediaMiner Member]  On: March 11, 2006 22:31 CST
Style of Writing: 1 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 3 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 2 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 1 of 10
Overall Rating: 1 of 10
ok, dude, I'm gonna be nice, since its your first story and your probably not very old. 1: Check your spelling BEFORE you post ANYTHING 2: Use quotations around speech. (Example: "Maaaan, I SURE love pizza!" )) 3: Capitalize your Names and Place's. 4: Dont type in all cap's! Its really ugly and will turn away reader's instantly. Instead, use font styles like Bold and Italic. Only Capitalize if its something important, its short, or is a name or place. 5: Describe what the crap your character's are doing! 6: Edit your fic with these corrections ^^ ~Kono~

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