| "HEATed up" Reviews/Comments [ 47 ] |
| Pages (4): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 ] |
Reviewed By: Tara/Willow On: December 08, 2002 13:48 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
I really enjoyed the fic. Hurry with the next chapter will you!?!?!Your story was good but could have been better in the spelling area. Nice job. |
Reviewed By: Inume On: November 28, 2002 21:47 CST
Comment/Review:
Oops I quess I messed up. I have read one by Leloi.
The first was "Birthday Wishes" and that one would be great for inspiration as well as the sites. |
Reviewed By: i ain't tellin' On: November 27, 2002 14:50 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 9 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 5 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
this was short, yet had the dirtiest language out of all the fanfics that i have read. therefore, A+ |
Reviewed By: inususu [MediaMiner Member] On: November 26, 2002 22:02 CST
Comment/Review:
cool |
Reviewed By: Pagasis [MediaMiner Member] On: November 25, 2002 16:12 CST
Comment/Review:
I hate Kagome!! I am so jealous. *Fereously blushes* Er... right. It was pretty touching. You are a good writer. Do some more. That is if you havn't allready. |
Reviewed By: Arc [MediaMiner Member] On: November 23, 2002 06:23 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 5 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 6 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 6 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 7 of 10
Overall Rating: 6 of 10 Comment/Review:
On Arc's reaction scale, you are a...
...Sigh
Style of Writing: Your style of writing was a little simplistic, but you got your point across. You could have used some MAJOR description, there. Also, Inuyasha and Kagome were almost totally OOC in the end, there.
Spelling and Grammar: Slightly better than writing style; most of the errors were common ones, ones even English speakers make, and quite a few that most NON-English-Speakers make.
Originality: I've seen this used before once or twice; nothing to make it annoying.
Overall: Somewhat ho-hum, but still enjoyable.
Suggestions: I would remove the word pussy (dick is acceptable, though you may want to change it to cock, as it's less vulgar). It jars your sentence. |
Reviewed By: Inume On: November 22, 2002 21:32 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
Okay......This is strange I just added a review not to long ago and noww it's...gone.
I even looked at it after I posted it.
Oh well...The best piece of advice I can give you to get a better idea for this, it was way too rushed, is to try these sites: www.angelfire.com/anime2/kagomeinuyasha/mf
and
iycorner.alandrem.net/fanfiction/tb-ffindex
Those sites have great fics on them and a lot of them are lemons.
They ight be of a little help...
If you don't want to revise it then thats completely fine by me.
I just thought that it was to rushed but if everyone else who reads it is happy with it I'm fine.
Anywho...This is probably one of the best fics that I've ever read in my life! |
Reviewed By: Inume On: November 22, 2002 20:38 CST
Rating(s):Overall Rating: 9 of 10 Comment/Review:
That was so sweet that she did that to help him out!
The only thing I would change is that it was a bit rushed.
I like the suggestion of reading Leloi or Lightening's lemon fics although I've never read one by those two so far.
But other than that it was great!!!! |
Reviewed By: cdkobasiuk [MediaMiner Member] On: November 21, 2002 19:20 CST
Comment/Review:
Your english was really good.
Your story was sweet too. |
Reviewed By: Mei On: November 20, 2002 01:05 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 10 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
If you hadn't said you're not native to the English language, I never would have guessed. This is a GREAT story!!! It's so sweet and heart-warming!!! I just about died from joy. I almost never read Inu-Yasha/Kagome stories that are so gently loving as this on.
Please write more. Like how they now act as mates or something!
I'd only change one thing. Loose the dirty language (pussy, dick, ect.). It really detracts from the romantic setting. But that is the ONLY thing I'd change. |
Reviewed By: Laura-chan On: November 19, 2002 15:33 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 8 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 8 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Comment/Review:
It'a very nice ff...
but I would have liked some more hentai stuff.
(I suggest you to follow what Kota Magic told you...read Leloi's and Lightening's lemon...THEY'RE TWO OF THE BEST AUTHORS!!!)
[sorry for my bad english, but I'm italian] |
Reviewed By: Eikos Butterfly On: November 19, 2002 09:22 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 6 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 9 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 7 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 9 of 10
Overall Rating: 8 of 10 Comment/Review:
Awwww. Inu/Kag is my favorite pairing in ANY anime. they're just so perfect for eachother. |
Reviewed By: Kota Magic [MediaMiner Member] On: November 19, 2002 00:42 CST
Comment/Review:
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too rushed! It was almost a PWP. My suggestion? Look it over again and revise it so that the action doesn't get so hurried about. Also, ditch the street words; read some of Leloi's or Lightening's lemons to get a feel for what makes a lemon good. |
Reviewed By: Megumis_Sakura [MediaMiner Member] On: November 18, 2002 17:42 CST
Rating(s):Style of Writing: 10 of 10
Spelling & Grammar: 8 of 10
Originality/Creativity: 9 of 10
Enjoyment Factor: 10 of 10
Overall Rating: 10 of 10 Comment/Review:
This is such a good fic! I'm not too good at english either, but it was great!! ^_^ |
Reviewed By: inuyasha's bitch On: November 20, 2002 17:17 CST
Comment/Review:
heeheehee i liked it
=D |
| Pages (4): [ « ‹ 1 2 3 4 ] |
