Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ You Will Be Mine ❯ I will have claimed you ( Chapter 11 )

Chapter 11 I will have claimed you   It would have been easier if she had realised sooner that she would come home to her parents’  house. It wasn’t exceptionally cold for a summer night, but Pan shivered violently as she stood in the garden. She couldn’t walk in through the front door naked, that much was obvious. Naked, covered in blood and dirtier than she had been since childhood. She walked around the house and levitated to her window. It was locked. With a frown, she forced it open. It made more noise than she had hoped and she jumped inside, racing to the bathroom and putting on her bathrobe at a superhuman speed. “Pan?” Her father opened her door and looked at her, a stern expression on his face. “It’d be nice if, next time, you’d mention –” he stopped, his eyes widening. “Pan, are you okay?” She looked up guiltily. “I’m fine, dad. We sparred.” His nostrils flared; only a little, but she knew what it meant. She knew what he smelled. In one step he had crossed the distance to her and grabbed her by her shoulders. “Did he touch you?” he demanded, concern and anger battling for dominance on his face and in his voice. “Dad,” she said, sounding more desperate than she wanted. She looked away. He put his hand under her chin, lifting her face up, looking her in the eyes for a moment. “That bastard,” he then said, softly. “Dad, no,” she said, “it’s not what you think. It’s not at all what you think. Surely you know Trunks better than that.” “You smell of – of..” “He didn’t hurt me, dad. He did nothing against my will,” she said, once more looking away. “You’re – why are you protecting him? He did hurt you,” her father said. She shook her head. “Everything he did, he did because I made him. Don’t, dad.” She wanted to throw her arms around him, cling to him and bury her face in his shoulder. She wanted her father to comfort her like he had when she was still a child. She wanted him to tell her that everything would be alright, that he would protect her against all harm; but breaking down in front of him would mean that Trunks had hurt her, and that would make this night even more of a disaster than it already was. She knew her father well enough that he, gentle though as his nature was, would seek out Trunks and beat him to a bloody pulp. Even Gohan was familiar with the Saiyan temper when his family was threatened. So she turned away from her father, moving back to the bathroom. “I’m going to take a shower,” she said, shooting him another look over her shoulder. The sight of him startled her. He looked helpless. She was not used to her father looking helpless, especially not because of her. She took a long breath and stepped into the bathroom, softly closing the door behind her.   xoxox   She slept long and deep; it was late in the morning when she woke up. She pulled the covers up almost over her head and kept her eyes closed, breathing deeply and evenly. Her dreams... She didn’t know what exactly she had dreamt before she had woken up, but she still remembered the general feel of it. There had been a lot of commotion and she hadn’t been really happy, but throughout the night there had been a feeling of comfort, of security maybe, and a satisfaction so instinctive that she barely realised it was there. It hadn’t left. Perhaps she had been too overwhelmed to notice it yesterday, but now that she thought about it, she was rather sure that it had she had felt it yesterday night, as well. It was Trunks. He was out of reach for her first five senses and his ki should have been too low to catch on her ki-sense. However, she could feel his ki, and somehow she could sense his presence in the back of her head. She knew that he was sleeping, and that his dreams were about as chaotic as hers, and she felt him unconsciously reach for her as she was reaching for him. So this was a bond, huh. She rolled on her other side, pulled her legs almost up to her chin and basked in the comforting feeling of his ki, for the moment repressing other emotions. Yesterday she had been overwhelmed by frustration, fury, hurt. Today she realised that she, in spite of everything, had succeeded. She had wanted Trunks, and now she had had him. She was still frustrated and hurt, but she had gotten herself what she had longed for. She might not have won the bet, but in the end she had gotten what she wanted. The victory was bittersweet, though. She had had Trunks, but at what price? They had loaded frustration on frustration, lust on anger, love on pain, until the load was so heavy that she wasn’t sure their friendship would be able to bear it. Did she hate him? If only it could be so simple. Ofcourse she loved him. She had loved him all her life. She had hated him for never realising it, hated him more for purposely hurting her when he finally knew. She would have liked to say that she still hated him because that might have made everything a little easier, but she didn’t, and she wouldn’t lie. Not to herself, at least. She hated how he had treated her since the night of Marron’s party. She hated that he had kept pushing her away, even when they both knew he wanted her. She hated that he had a girlfriend. She hated that he said and did just the things that hurt her most. But for the first time since they had made the bet, she realised that Trunks hadn’t had the slightest idea of what he was doing, either.   Her parents avoided the topic altogether. She was sure that her father had told her mother, but when she stepped into the kitchen, Videl didn’t say anything about it. Only once did she try to bring the topic of Trunks up and when Pan said she didn’t want to talk about it, she left it alone. It gave Pan a mingled feeling – she was proud that her parents trusted her enough to handle things on her own, but she felt ashamed that she had let them down and kept them in the dark. Her parents knew she’d had boyfriends and her mother knew or at least suspected that Pan had had sex before. And while her parents didn’t encourage that, they couldn’t forbid it, either. However, this situation was much more complicated. She and Trunks weren’t in a relationship. They weren’t even dating. He was an old friend of the family and fourteen years her senior. Her parents knew she’d had a crush as a kid, but they wouldn’t have dreamed that she’d ever actually act on it. Nor would they have expected Trunks to return her feelings. She knew they wanted an explanation, but as for now, she wasn’t willing to give one.   For a few days, she managed to avoid Trunks. It was as simple as not visiting Capsule Corps., since he didn’t come looking for her either. Instead she met up with friends from college, sparred with her father and trained by herself. Her feelings were confusing her. Something had changed when they had had sex, but she wasn’t sure what exactly. She was still mad at him for the way he had treated her, that much hadn’t changed. However, the overpowering need to see him, feel him, fuck him, have him, seemed to have toned down to a desire that was almost acceptable. He was still continuously on her mind, but it was more like it had been before the madness. He was on the back of her mind, not at the center of her attention. Madness indeed. Her cheeks burned merely at the thought of it. She had made a fool out herself, over and over again. These past few days she’d felt as if she were coming down from a high. It reminded her of what drugs supposedly did to people: she remembered what she had done, but the reasoning that at the time had felt logical, made sense no longer. She didn’t know what had possessed her to make the bet in the first place   xoxox   She had known she couldn’t avoid her friends forever, but it was just ironic to run into them when she was trying so hard to stay away. She had gone into town on an errand for her father, when she walked into Bra and Marron on the sideway. “Pan?” Marron exclaimed, happily. “Good to see you! Where have you been hiding, lately?” Bra just looked at her. “Bra, Marron, hi,” Pan said, slightly breathless. She lowered her eyes, unable to meet her friend’s gaze. Marron looked from Bra to Pan and back. “Okay, what am I missing here?” She frowned. “This doesn’t still have to do with that night in the Viking, does it?” Pan blushed and shook her head, while Bra shrugged her shoulders and looked at her pointedly. “Nothing, Marron,” she said, keeping her gaze on her black-haired friend, “Unless Pan has something she’s forgot to tell us.” Oh, yes, she was Vegeta’s child. “Nothing,” Pan said, silently cursing the give-away blush on her cheeks. “But hey, I gotta run, my dad’s expecting me. I’ll see you guys later!” Marron nodded, a puzzled look on her face. “Okay, we’ll see you.” “Yeah, you will,” Bra said, still looking at her. Pan flashed a nervous smile and all but ran away, inwardly calling herself a coward.   xoxox   When she came home, she knew she couldn’t evade her friends any longer. Besides, she shouldn’t keep running away. She wanted to, but she knew she shouldn’t. She’d been running away the whole month, and it hadn’t done her any good. At least, that was what people would like her to believe. She shook her head sharply. “You’re not backing out of this, Pan,” she mumbled to herself. “Bra came by. She’s in your room,” her father said when she walked into the living room. Pan smiled at him, braced herself and headed to her bedroom. The door was open and her friend was sitting on her bed, a pensive look on her face. “So you and Trunks did have sex,” she said, by manner of greeting. Pan felt the heat rush to her face again. “Why would you say that?” she blurted out and hastily kicked the door shut. “I came to the conclusion that the only reason you could have for avoiding us, was that you and Trunks had another confrontation.” The blue-haired girl sighed and pulled Pan’s pillow on her knees, almost cuddling it. “Did you really have to be so stupid?” “Don’t blame it all on me,” Pan said, offended. “Trunks – ” The blue-haired girl leaned on the pillow, one hand under her chin. “Oh, Pan, you know just as well as I that Trunks would’ve managed to avoid you long enough. You were the one who went looking for him.” Pan frowned. “He’s the one that jumped me.” Bra looked at her pointedly. “After you knocked Katu unconscious.What was he supposed to do? Either way, you shouldn’t have been at Capsule Corps.” “And why shouldn’t I?” Pan snapped. “Because you screwed up everything,” her friend replied coolly. Pan glared at her. “Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. Either way, it’s none of your business.” That earned her an indignant look. “He’s my brother.” Pan rolled her eyes. “And he’s got his own life,” She dropped down on the bed next to Bra, but kept a considerable distance between them. The girl was Vegeta’s daughter, and she had inherited both her parents’ temper. The past had proven her to be a little touchy on the subject of her brother and Pan didn’t really want to be within arm’s reach if she managed to piss the Saiyan princess off. “Which you royally screwed up,” said Saiyan princess replied. “Which, I repeat, is none of your business,” Pan snapped. “Why are you so against us as a couple, anyway? You’re the one who encouraged me in the first place!” “And I was stupid.” Bra sighed and hugged the pillow close to her chest, looking at her friend with huge, serious eyes. “It was a stupid, pubescent idea that sounded like it was fun, my best friend dating my brother. I never –” She looked at Pan helplessly. “I never thought you’d actually do it, and... I’ve seen Trunks, you know. I know my brother. He isn’t happy with the situation.” Pan rubbed her forehead and sighed. “Well, he’s the one who can change that.” For a moment Bra stared at her. “Pan – have you for a second considered the possibility of him not returning your feelings?” she then asked, a worried look on her face. Pan frowned. “How is that still relevant?” She shook her head. “Bra, I didn’t rape him. I didn’t even seduce him. He was in it just as much as I.” The other girl gave her a scandalized look. “You were in heat.” “What does that change?” Pan said, indignant. Bra threw her hands in the air, rolling her eyes. “How in the world was he supposed to resist you?” “Vegeta could,” Pan huffed. “It’s not like men go crazy because of it, Bra.” “Only as crazy as you’ve been, these past few weeks,” Bra retorted. “My father’s twice Trunks’ age. He’s got a massive amount of experience. And your attention was on Trunks. You were after him.” Pan blushed. “He knew that and he consented.” Bra shrugged. “No doubt he got tricked by his pride, but that’s –” “You’re making excuses for him.” Bra blinked twice. “That doesn’t change the fact that you’ve literally been irresistible to him,” she then said, patiently. Pan looked down at her hands, pressing the nails of one hand into the fingertips of the other. “I didn’t know that, right? And I don’t think that would’ve changed a thing.” Bra looked at her friend. “You love him.” It wasn’t even a question. Pan closed her eyes. “I don’t even know what that means, Bra. But I want him, at pretty much any price.” “Even when he doesn’t really want you?” Bra’s voice was soft now, worried even. Pan didn’t dare to look up. “It doesn’t make a difference now, does it?” “What do you mean?” Bra asked, confused. “Nothing...” Her voice trailed off. For a while they just sat on the bed, avoiding each other’s eyes. They seemed to be in that position rather often, these days. The thought almost made Pan grin. Almost – if there hadn’t been something she really wanted to know. “Does he really hate me?” she asked, meekly. Bra looked at her. “You of all people should know better.” Pan flinched. “I don’t. I – I hate him, Bra.” She could not look at her friend. “I hate him for – Why wouldn’t he hate me, if I do?” Bra kept silent. “You can’t hate somebody if you don’t love him,” she eventually said. Pan sighed. “Ofcourse he loves me. I’m his friend...” Her voice trailed off, uncertain. “Are you still?” Bra asked. She stared at the floor. “I don’t know.”   xoxox   AN: Eh. I’m sorry, this absence is simply inexcusable. I could tell you that I’ve been very busy with college and people, which is true, but that doesn’t change the fact that I could have written something. As it is, I just didn’t feel like writing fanfiction. If you’re really desperate for my fiction (or you just want to nag at me for finishing this), there is a link to my fiction livejournal on my user page. As for the chapter: No, this is obviously not the end. And yes, I will finish this story. I have said it before and I will say it again, but unless I die or lose my hands, this story will be finished. If you’re really unsure about it, feel free to email me. It’s rather annoying to have people ask me “Are you ever going to finish this?” in reviews. Makes me say “Yes, I will!” to the computer, and the poor thing doesn’t care.   P.S. (and yes, this is getting long, sorry for that as well) I don’t normally react to reviews in my author’s notes, but this one just annoyed me too much. Dark Witch Pan, I wish I could say I didn’t give a damn about whether you think Pan is a slut or not, but unfortunately, I do. I’m going to say this only once: a woman who wants and enjoys sex is not a slut. A slut is, and I quote the Cambridge international dictionary of English here, a woman who has sexual relationships with a lot of men without any emotional involvement. In this story, Pan only has a sexual relationship with Trunks and she is very much emotionally involved, so she is obviously not a slut. (and I won’t even go into the fact that nowadays, women can have one-night-stands and not be sluts. I would define ‘slut’ as a person (woman or man) who has sex with anyone who is willing, regardless of anything).