Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ Feel Me, Shame Me, Heal Me ❯ Prologue ( Prologue )

Disclaimer: What makes you think I could possibly own this? Just where are you getting your information? honestly!

 

Summary: Winry determined to find the Elric brothers, headed to Central. Life is definitely full of surprises, and she certainly didn't expect this one.

 

A/N: As a huge fan of alternate pairings, I decided to try my hand at this one. Yes it's a Fullmetal Alchemist- Roy x Winry pairing. There aren't many of these around because it's not an easy pairing to write. The timeline isn't specific, it's just somewhere between the start of the series and before the movie. It's not an AU fic, even though the pairing is alternate.

 

This beginning chapter and the very end chapter will be the only ones written in first person. I much prefer narrative myself, but the prologue and end is just begging for first person.

 

 

Feel Me, Shame Me, Heal Me
Prologue

 

How did I get here? How did I get to this particular point in my life?

 

It was near two in the morning and here I am sitting on this window seat looking out as the rain beat down against the glass, my legs pulled up to my chest, just staring.

 

I rest my chin on my knees.

 

Why can't I walk away? Why can't I say no? What's the matter with me? I always come back. I don't want to come back, right? I want to stay away… but I don't. It's like I have no control over myself.

 

What would Ed or Al say if they could see me now? I don't even know where they are. I'm not any closer to finding them than I was half a year ago. Sure, Ed sends me a letter every now and then, but by the time I get it, the Elric brothers have already moved onto the next place. Ed hasn't even returned to me for repairs yet. What if he's dead?

 

I'm sure my face paled at that last thought.

 

I realize that I don't want Ed to see me like this, I don't want him to know what I've been up to. I am ashamed of myself in every possible way, but that doesn't matter because no matter what, I always return to this. What is this exactly? I am afraid to even give it a name in my thoughts. Maybe I will feel less dirty if I do not name what this is, what I am doing. I am only fifteen years old, someone my age shouldn't be thinking about this, shouldn't even be living this kind of arrangement. No, that's wrong… it's not really an arrangement. It's— I hear shifting behind me and I stiffen, until all grows quiet again, only then do I relax.

 

Six months ago I left my home in the country, for the hustle and bustle of Central. I came here searching for any information I could get on Ed and Al. I was so determined to follow them to the ends of the Earth, if only I could get a lead on where they were. I knew it might take some time so I rented out a small flat, it wasn't in a bad location, the area is actually pretty nice. The rent was low because sometimes the heat tended to conk out from time to time and cold water would all of a sudden run red hot.

 

My automail skills definitely come in handy in a big city like this. I do have some competitors, and I don't think they like me much. I am practically an expert in my craft. Personally, I think they are just jealous.

 

A flash of lightning brightened up the dark rainy sky for a moment. I usually like the rain, but not tonight. It made everything seem dreary and cold.

 

Hands come down on my shoulders and I jump slightly, having been startled as I heard no movement behind me. If I was smart, I would have left already and headed home to my flat. Do I really want to be here, like this? I try to shrug out from the touch, but the grip tightens obviously with no intention of release.

 

I won't turn my head, I won't look.

 

I should be used to this by now, but there are times when it feels brand new and I get worried and afraid. This was currently one of those times.

 

Fingers soft and gentle slide up the back of my neck and thread through my long blonde hair, massaging my scalp and I close my eyes. Those fingers are very skillful and they seem to melt me completely at times, that it really scares me. It always has. This is completely inappropriate, and I know it is. It has been since this started. For one the owner of those very fingers, those teasing hands is far too old for me, and I know I am too young for him. I wonder if this is even illegal. Plus there's the fact that I am supposed to hate him until the day I die. Shame surges my veins and I shift forward, out of reach.

 

“Don't think about it.” He tells me in a voice as smooth and rich as dark chocolate. I feel lightheaded at just the sound of that voice of his. He sits down behind me and wraps one hand around my hip.

 

“I should leave now.” I say, but make no move to get up. “I should just pack up and head back to the country where I belong.”

 

“You always say that, but never have any real intention of doing so.” Is his smug reply and I moved to get up only he holds me down. Yeah I remember, I hate him, especially when he lowers his face, his lips to my shoulder and his hands start stroking my hips and glide over my belly. My heart starts to race…

 

How did I get here? How did I get to this particular point in my life?

 

Why do I, Winry Rockbell, let this…this person I hate, this person Ed hates… this person Roy Mustang touch me?

 

I need to go back, back to when this all started to figure out my head and where I lost it somewhere along the way in my desperate need to find Ed and Al. Will you come along with me on my inner journey and face it with me? I don't think I could go over all this again alone. What do you say? Come with me and together we'll find out just what happened.

 

======

So how was my very first intro, nothing too out of character I hope.

 

Thanks for reading

Ryoko Blue