Hamtaro Fan Fiction ❯ Uki's pleasures and pain ❯ Chapter 4

Something for the readers: Obsidian Dancer, I'm saying it one more time. You're all right! Second, to Jonathan the 'Whoever the hell you are', get a damn email addy and stick to one name. You change your identity more than Prince. Finally, to the ass bastard that keeps saying I'm sick because of the stuff I write, quit reading. I'm not sick, I just have a slight case of Irritable Male Syndrome, and until I get my dick sucked, you can either find a girl to break me off, or you just deal with it. Now that I'm done with the crap, back to the show.

It was lunchtime, and everyone was eating seeds, Oxnard more than any other ham. All of them were eating, krumping down seeds like it was nothing, even a few belches were heard. Pashmina was still mad and leered Cappy the whole time. "It feels so good to have a happy stomach." said Oxnard.

"I'm glad you're happy," Pashmina said. "I'm real damn mad."

"Can I help calm you down?" asked Cappy.

"What do you think?"

"What's your problem?"

"You're my problem! I'm going to make sure I get you and get you good."

"What I do?"

"You jumped on Penny while she was drugged you horny son of a-"

"Anyway, who do you think will be the first one to get pregnant, Boss?" asked Stan.

"It better not be Penelope." Boss said, warning Cappy. "If she does, I will be highly upset. She's way too young!"

"Well, who do you think?"

"Hopefully Pashmina or Sandy."

"Boss, Stan, you two aren't helping!" yelled Pashmina. She then turned to Cappy. "Expect to get your little hamster ass kicked bad."

"You sound like Sue's mom when she goes through what humans call, 'PMS' Pashmina."

"PMS?" asked Stan, "I get it, does it mean Pussy Meltdown System?"

"Stan!" all the female hams wanted to pummel the snot out of him.

"Well look, I didn't do anything wrong-" said Cappy...

But Pashmina cut him off. "You took advantage of Penny while she was drugged. You are so dead when I get my hands on you."

"Dexter, please lay Pashmina. She acting like 'Superbitch' on steroids. Do something."

" I got your 'Superbitch' right here!"

Pashmina leapt over almost every ham in her way and tackled Cappy and proceeded to kick Cappy's shy little ham ass. The hams tried to break up the fight, but to no avail, Pashmina wouldn't stop her assault. It took Dexter to finally rip Pashmina off of Cappy, who was happy the fight was over, but Pashmina made sure Cappy had some red in his fur. This made Penelope cry, "Why are you doing this to him, Pashmina?" she asked. "I would never do this to the ham you loved... Talk to me when you've come to your senses, you... you... you... Superbitch!" and off she ran home.

"Penny, wait!" Pashmina yelled. "Damn. Cappy, this isn't ov-"

"Pashmina, it's time we had a talk." said Dexter. "And believe me, we're going to be at it for a while."

"Let me go, Dexter."

"I'm not going to, not until I've had my way with you yet." and Pashmina was dragged by Dexter into the tall green grass.

Stan just watched them go, "Looks like Pashmina's going to get that 'Dexteroni' now." he said with a chuckle.