Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction ❯ CHANGING DARKNESS ❯ First encounter ( Chapter 2 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Steve VADER 
The first meeting between Shinji and the Sith.
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Sci-fi / Romance / Hentai / Action | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 09.15.2003 | Pages: 5 | Words: 2.5K | Visits: 2.4K | Status: Completed
The first meeting between Shinji and the Sith.
Anime/Manga: Neon Genesis Evangelion Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Sci-fi / Romance / Hentai / Action | Type: Continuation | Uploaded On: 09.15.2003 | Pages: 5 | Words: 2.5K | Visits: 2.4K | Status: Completed
CHANIGIG DARKNESS INTO THE LIGHT
Book 1: Changing Darkness
Chapter 2: First encounter
Shinji stood on the edge of a cliff. He was ignorant of the cool wind, of the thunderous roaring
which could be heard below and even the cries of the birds circling overhead. In fact, so lost was
he in his dark thoughts that he was oblivious to just about everything.
<2 days. 2 days since I defeated the so called 4th angel. 2 days since I nearly killed 2 humans.
2 days since I discovered that nobody cares about me.
Yesterday I choose to run away, again. No other possibility existed but that. And now I'm standing
here, ready to jump, but too cowardly to do it. I'm disgusting.>
He looked down to the bottom of the cliff and sighed.
<I should end my suffering. Why should I continue it? Why should I fight for mankind? What has mankind
ever done for me? I owe them nothing. Why should I suffer for them? For what purpose? I have no
friends, no one whom is worthy of my suffering. I have no family, I can see that now. My father just
needs me for his work, the abuses which my mind and body suffer mean nothing to him, he doesn't care.
Katsuragi only pretends to care for me, it's just her work, something that she has to do. I thought
otherwise, but now I know the truth. Ayanami cares about nothing. The first time I piloted that monster
for her so that she didn't have to suffer, but did she thank me? No. She doesn't care either.
The second time I piloted, I did it because everybody told me to do so, and instead of praise I got
chewed out. That damned angel was dead. I have finished this assignment, killed the angel as they wanted.
And for that I got a lesson in "1000 Ways to make a subordinate uncomfortable".
Uncaring. Distrust. Hate. Fear. Betrayal. This is my world.>
He sighed again. Then he took a step forward. Now he stood only centimeters away from the end of his live.
As he wanted to take this final step, a voice stopped him.
"Wanna jump?"
########################################################### ############# ######################
As he made is way toward Tokyo 3, he saw a boy standing on the edge of a cliff.
<Wimps are everywhere. And another one bites the dust.>
He observed the boy for several minutes, then he decided to go to the boy.
<Hell, this wimp is even too cowardly to finish it. Disgusting. I wonder why he is such a wimp.
If he has no explanation, well, then he'll get a push in the right direction.>
As he stood only 1 meter behind the boy he asked: "Wanna jump?"
########################################################### ############# ######################
As Shinji heard the voice, he jumped back.
"What do you want?"
"I thought I asked you a question. It is impolite to answer a question with another one."
"Gomen."
"No problem, But I'm still waiting for an answer."
"Gomen. Y...y....yes."
"Why?"
Shinji thought: <This guy's getting on my nerves. Can't I have rest and peace when I decide to die?>
"Why not?"
"Well, when you jump down here, you'll make a pretty mess. It's nearly 30 meters high so I am sure
that you'll be a pretty big fat stain after you jumped. And because this is a secluded spot
it would take several days until someone found you. Which means that they will find a large
fat-stain in the landscape, covered with maggots, half eaten by animals,......not really a nice
picture. And it would stink, too."
Shinji changes his color to a more greenish shade. <Why I haven't thought about that. I thought
that at my burial at least one or two persons would be there, looking one last time at me, and maybe
have some regrets. But this is disgusting. They'll have to shovel me into the casket.>
"Not a nice picture, eh?"
"No."
"And why?"
Shinji looked at the man. Average height, massive build, clad completely in black, with black
sunglasses included.
<I don't know him. He isn't from section 2, they wear at least something white,
but this guy is strange. But he also is the first one that showed some interest for me since a long
time ago. Why he does that is beyond my comprehension. Is he maybe one of those molesters that are so
often heard of? Not that it would be important. It would just be a fitting end for my miserable
life. Raped, and then thrown off of a cliff. At least I won't have to jump all by myself.>
"What do you want from me? Why do you ask me these questions? What does it matter?"
"I want nothing from you, I just want to understand. To do this, I have to ask you questions.
And you are right, it doesn't matter, but I still want to satisfy my curiosity."
"So, I'm just a little lab-rat for you?"
"Hardly. Rats cannot speak."
"Why should I tell you?"
"Why not? Whether you jump now or in 10 minutes is irrelevant. You will still be dead. But you have the
chance to seek understanding from at least one person, because this person is here, now, and is
interested in your story. Do you understand?"
"Yes. And I will tell you."
"Good."
The man sat down on the grass and Shinji decided that it would be best to sit beside him during the
conversation.
<This is my last conversation. No reason to be uncomfortable.>
"Where should I begin?"
"At the beginning?"
"That will be a long story."
"I have time."
"As I was 4 years old, my mother died. It was some kind of accident, but I don't know what exactly
happened. The few memories I have, indicate that we were a lucky family. That all ended on that day,
as mother died."
"And your father?"
"After the death of mother, he became cold. Only a few days after the burial, he sent me away."
"Where did he send you?"
"To a teacher. Yes, I learned much, I got enough food, and I wasn't hurt by him. But I had no friends,
or some kind of family either. I learned to play the cello, but I don't care about it. I learned
for school, I've got good grades, but I didn't care about it. I only existed."
"Sounds pretty hollow."
"It was. But it was still better that the situation now."
"Why?"
"A few weeks ago I received a letter from my father. I should come to him. I thought that he wanted to
really be my father again."
"Unlikely. What happened?"
"As I get into Tokyo3, a monster attacked the city. Some strange woman showed up to bring me to my father,
and we nearly died on the way. And instead of being greeted by my father, I landed in front of a 40 story
high monster, and my father told me to pilot it."
############################################################# ########### ######################
The man looked surprised and overjoyed.
<That boy is a pilot? The force is really with me. Ok, time to forget the idea with the push,
I need him. Hm, it looks like that I have to help him. But how? I have to think, fast.
I think that this little conversation won't last too long and at the end of it I need a solution.>
"What happened? I'm sure that you didn't say:'Please let me pilot, please!'"
"I said no. I was disappointed. I was hurt. My father didn't want me as his son. He just wants me
as his tool."
"Bastard."
"As I said no, he called for another pilot."
<So, there are at least two pilots. Good.>
"If there was another pilot, why did he call for you?"
"She was injured. Pretty bad. As they brought her to the Eva, she lay on a medical bed and wasn't able
to stand up. But she still tried, because my father said so."
"Is she your sister?"
"No. But father acts as a father towards her. As she lay on the stretcher, the attacks from the angel
caused the ceiling to collapse. And she fell to the floor. I held her and my hand was covered with her blood.
Eva protected us from the debris, but she fell into unconsciousness. It wasn't right that she had to pilot.
So I decided to do it. For her."
"He used guilt to force you to pilot."
"Yes."
"And you defeated the angel? Without training?"
<Maybe he has some kind of potential.>
"No. The angel beat me up. And then the Eva went berserk and destroyed the angel. I don't know what
exactly happened, nobody told me. I just woke up in the infirmary. Then all the people there made it clear
that I'm now a pilot. Nobody asked me if I wanted to do it again. They simply told me to do so."
"You could have said no."
"Then they would have used another angle to make me pilot. And I thought that now things would get better,
because my superior, Captain Katsuragi decided to take me into her home. I thought that she cared."
"But she didn't?"
"Yes. Two days ago I found the journal which she has to write for my father. Her reports about me.
I live just with her, so that she has better opportunities to observe me."
"What else was there? That couldn't be all."
"In school, all the students get excited as I told them that I'm the pilot. And I got punched for the fact
that I'm the pilot. And at the same time, the next angel begun his attack. And I had to pilot again.
Ayanami was still unable to pilot, so I had to fight it."
"Ayanami?"
"The other pilot. And I was successful. I killed that thing. But instead of praise, I got chewed out."
"For a success? Why?"
<Results are what count. Not even I would chew out a soldier after a success. And I'm Sith.>
"I disobeyed orders. In the battle, I was crushed into a nearby hill. Two students from my class were
nearly crushed. They let them in the entry plug and ordered a retreat. But I didn't want to run away.
So I fought. And I won."
"Who were these students? And, more importantly, how did you defeat it?"
"They were two guys. One of them was the jerk that punched me."
"Why didn't you squish him like a bug?"
"I won't hurt another person. I won as I stabbed my Prog-knife into the core of the angel.
And since it didn't self destruct like the first one, they have now the entire body to study."
"If I was in command, you would have received a medal, a promotion and I would have sent some girls for fun.
I mean this is ridiculous. A great victory, the possibility to study the enemy, and all that because you
decided to ignore their foolish orders."
"They said that I have to obey all orders. And because I didn't do that, they had to chew me out."
"Bullshit. If you disobey orders and screw up, you'll be punished. If you disobey orders and are successful,
you get a reward. The result counts. Not even the greatest idiots I know would punish a soldier for success."
"They've done it. And that's one of the reason why I'm here."
"The other reasons are your father, the other pilot, the jerks in school and the betrayal by your so
called guardian."
"Yes."
"It looks like that you have plenty of reason to make a splash."
"Yes, I have."
"One last question. Why do you want to end your life instead of pushing back?"
"I won't hurt another human."
"But they hurt you. Badly. Again and again. You have the right to push back."
"I WON'T hurt another person."
"Why? What reason do you have to take abuse and punishment without revenge?"
"I learned to do so. My teacher told me th......."
"Your teacher told you what he had to so that your father would be satisfied. Your father wanted
a tool, and you teacher made you a tool. And he was so successful that YOU decided TO BE a tool."
"I'm not a tool. I'M NOT A TOOL!!"
"Yes, you are. And now you begin to realize this. Now you have to confirm the lies in yourself
because you realized the truth. So, will you acknowledge the reality and act so, or will you commit
suicide and be discarded like a tool that nobody needs anymore?"
"I will not die."
"Then don't do it."
"What should I do?"
"Push back."
"Even if I hurt another person?"
"They have hurt you too. Now it is time for revenge."
"How should I avenge myself? I have no power."
"You pilot the only big robot on this planet. The other pilot is injured and therefore no match.
You have all power you need. Use it."
<And now I strengthen his dark side a little bit and I have a powerful ally.>
######################################################## ################ ######################
<What's that? Why am I suddenly so sure? My world is shattered. And I want to rebuild it for me.
For my needs. I still don't want to hurt anybody, but if necessary, I will do it. Why am I
suddenly so strong?>
"I will use it. I want to live. I don't want to suffer anymore. I want to live. I don't wanna be a
tool. I want to live. I don't wanna be manipulated. I don't want to be betrayed. I don't want to be
lied to. I don't want to be forced to do thing things that I won't do. I WANT TO LIVE!"
"Then do it. You have taken a lot of abuse. You are strong. Stronger that you think. Use that
strength. Use it to reach your goals. Use it to define your goals. Do it."
"I will. I will do it."
"Good. Now I have to go. I have some business to attend."
"Will I see you again?"
"I don't know. It depends if I'm successful or not. But be sure, now that you have found your will,
you won't need me anymore."
<And if I fail, I have an ally.>
"I don't know that, but I will try. I will reach my goals. And nobody will stop me."
"Right. Whoever stands in the way, must be destroyed."
"If necessary, yes."
"Goodbye."
"Bye."
And with that, the strange man stood up and left.
<I don't know why, but I'm sure that we'll see again.>
####################################################### ################# ######################
He left the grass on the cliff and marched toward the nearest street.
<Life is good. Even when I have no success with the computers, I have access to a pilot.>
After he reached the street he made his way towards Tokyo3, the city that was built as fortress
against the angels.
END OF CHAPTER 2
---------------------------------------------------------------- -------- ---------------------------
Preread done by Ezstarius.
Domo arigato.
Book 1: Changing Darkness
Chapter 2: First encounter
Shinji stood on the edge of a cliff. He was ignorant of the cool wind, of the thunderous roaring
which could be heard below and even the cries of the birds circling overhead. In fact, so lost was
he in his dark thoughts that he was oblivious to just about everything.
<2 days. 2 days since I defeated the so called 4th angel. 2 days since I nearly killed 2 humans.
2 days since I discovered that nobody cares about me.
Yesterday I choose to run away, again. No other possibility existed but that. And now I'm standing
here, ready to jump, but too cowardly to do it. I'm disgusting.>
He looked down to the bottom of the cliff and sighed.
<I should end my suffering. Why should I continue it? Why should I fight for mankind? What has mankind
ever done for me? I owe them nothing. Why should I suffer for them? For what purpose? I have no
friends, no one whom is worthy of my suffering. I have no family, I can see that now. My father just
needs me for his work, the abuses which my mind and body suffer mean nothing to him, he doesn't care.
Katsuragi only pretends to care for me, it's just her work, something that she has to do. I thought
otherwise, but now I know the truth. Ayanami cares about nothing. The first time I piloted that monster
for her so that she didn't have to suffer, but did she thank me? No. She doesn't care either.
The second time I piloted, I did it because everybody told me to do so, and instead of praise I got
chewed out. That damned angel was dead. I have finished this assignment, killed the angel as they wanted.
And for that I got a lesson in "1000 Ways to make a subordinate uncomfortable".
Uncaring. Distrust. Hate. Fear. Betrayal. This is my world.>
He sighed again. Then he took a step forward. Now he stood only centimeters away from the end of his live.
As he wanted to take this final step, a voice stopped him.
"Wanna jump?"
########################################################### ############# ######################
As he made is way toward Tokyo 3, he saw a boy standing on the edge of a cliff.
<Wimps are everywhere. And another one bites the dust.>
He observed the boy for several minutes, then he decided to go to the boy.
<Hell, this wimp is even too cowardly to finish it. Disgusting. I wonder why he is such a wimp.
If he has no explanation, well, then he'll get a push in the right direction.>
As he stood only 1 meter behind the boy he asked: "Wanna jump?"
########################################################### ############# ######################
As Shinji heard the voice, he jumped back.
"What do you want?"
"I thought I asked you a question. It is impolite to answer a question with another one."
"Gomen."
"No problem, But I'm still waiting for an answer."
"Gomen. Y...y....yes."
"Why?"
Shinji thought: <This guy's getting on my nerves. Can't I have rest and peace when I decide to die?>
"Why not?"
"Well, when you jump down here, you'll make a pretty mess. It's nearly 30 meters high so I am sure
that you'll be a pretty big fat stain after you jumped. And because this is a secluded spot
it would take several days until someone found you. Which means that they will find a large
fat-stain in the landscape, covered with maggots, half eaten by animals,......not really a nice
picture. And it would stink, too."
Shinji changes his color to a more greenish shade. <Why I haven't thought about that. I thought
that at my burial at least one or two persons would be there, looking one last time at me, and maybe
have some regrets. But this is disgusting. They'll have to shovel me into the casket.>
"Not a nice picture, eh?"
"No."
"And why?"
Shinji looked at the man. Average height, massive build, clad completely in black, with black
sunglasses included.
<I don't know him. He isn't from section 2, they wear at least something white,
but this guy is strange. But he also is the first one that showed some interest for me since a long
time ago. Why he does that is beyond my comprehension. Is he maybe one of those molesters that are so
often heard of? Not that it would be important. It would just be a fitting end for my miserable
life. Raped, and then thrown off of a cliff. At least I won't have to jump all by myself.>
"What do you want from me? Why do you ask me these questions? What does it matter?"
"I want nothing from you, I just want to understand. To do this, I have to ask you questions.
And you are right, it doesn't matter, but I still want to satisfy my curiosity."
"So, I'm just a little lab-rat for you?"
"Hardly. Rats cannot speak."
"Why should I tell you?"
"Why not? Whether you jump now or in 10 minutes is irrelevant. You will still be dead. But you have the
chance to seek understanding from at least one person, because this person is here, now, and is
interested in your story. Do you understand?"
"Yes. And I will tell you."
"Good."
The man sat down on the grass and Shinji decided that it would be best to sit beside him during the
conversation.
<This is my last conversation. No reason to be uncomfortable.>
"Where should I begin?"
"At the beginning?"
"That will be a long story."
"I have time."
"As I was 4 years old, my mother died. It was some kind of accident, but I don't know what exactly
happened. The few memories I have, indicate that we were a lucky family. That all ended on that day,
as mother died."
"And your father?"
"After the death of mother, he became cold. Only a few days after the burial, he sent me away."
"Where did he send you?"
"To a teacher. Yes, I learned much, I got enough food, and I wasn't hurt by him. But I had no friends,
or some kind of family either. I learned to play the cello, but I don't care about it. I learned
for school, I've got good grades, but I didn't care about it. I only existed."
"Sounds pretty hollow."
"It was. But it was still better that the situation now."
"Why?"
"A few weeks ago I received a letter from my father. I should come to him. I thought that he wanted to
really be my father again."
"Unlikely. What happened?"
"As I get into Tokyo3, a monster attacked the city. Some strange woman showed up to bring me to my father,
and we nearly died on the way. And instead of being greeted by my father, I landed in front of a 40 story
high monster, and my father told me to pilot it."
############################################################# ########### ######################
The man looked surprised and overjoyed.
<That boy is a pilot? The force is really with me. Ok, time to forget the idea with the push,
I need him. Hm, it looks like that I have to help him. But how? I have to think, fast.
I think that this little conversation won't last too long and at the end of it I need a solution.>
"What happened? I'm sure that you didn't say:'Please let me pilot, please!'"
"I said no. I was disappointed. I was hurt. My father didn't want me as his son. He just wants me
as his tool."
"Bastard."
"As I said no, he called for another pilot."
<So, there are at least two pilots. Good.>
"If there was another pilot, why did he call for you?"
"She was injured. Pretty bad. As they brought her to the Eva, she lay on a medical bed and wasn't able
to stand up. But she still tried, because my father said so."
"Is she your sister?"
"No. But father acts as a father towards her. As she lay on the stretcher, the attacks from the angel
caused the ceiling to collapse. And she fell to the floor. I held her and my hand was covered with her blood.
Eva protected us from the debris, but she fell into unconsciousness. It wasn't right that she had to pilot.
So I decided to do it. For her."
"He used guilt to force you to pilot."
"Yes."
"And you defeated the angel? Without training?"
<Maybe he has some kind of potential.>
"No. The angel beat me up. And then the Eva went berserk and destroyed the angel. I don't know what
exactly happened, nobody told me. I just woke up in the infirmary. Then all the people there made it clear
that I'm now a pilot. Nobody asked me if I wanted to do it again. They simply told me to do so."
"You could have said no."
"Then they would have used another angle to make me pilot. And I thought that now things would get better,
because my superior, Captain Katsuragi decided to take me into her home. I thought that she cared."
"But she didn't?"
"Yes. Two days ago I found the journal which she has to write for my father. Her reports about me.
I live just with her, so that she has better opportunities to observe me."
"What else was there? That couldn't be all."
"In school, all the students get excited as I told them that I'm the pilot. And I got punched for the fact
that I'm the pilot. And at the same time, the next angel begun his attack. And I had to pilot again.
Ayanami was still unable to pilot, so I had to fight it."
"Ayanami?"
"The other pilot. And I was successful. I killed that thing. But instead of praise, I got chewed out."
"For a success? Why?"
<Results are what count. Not even I would chew out a soldier after a success. And I'm Sith.>
"I disobeyed orders. In the battle, I was crushed into a nearby hill. Two students from my class were
nearly crushed. They let them in the entry plug and ordered a retreat. But I didn't want to run away.
So I fought. And I won."
"Who were these students? And, more importantly, how did you defeat it?"
"They were two guys. One of them was the jerk that punched me."
"Why didn't you squish him like a bug?"
"I won't hurt another person. I won as I stabbed my Prog-knife into the core of the angel.
And since it didn't self destruct like the first one, they have now the entire body to study."
"If I was in command, you would have received a medal, a promotion and I would have sent some girls for fun.
I mean this is ridiculous. A great victory, the possibility to study the enemy, and all that because you
decided to ignore their foolish orders."
"They said that I have to obey all orders. And because I didn't do that, they had to chew me out."
"Bullshit. If you disobey orders and screw up, you'll be punished. If you disobey orders and are successful,
you get a reward. The result counts. Not even the greatest idiots I know would punish a soldier for success."
"They've done it. And that's one of the reason why I'm here."
"The other reasons are your father, the other pilot, the jerks in school and the betrayal by your so
called guardian."
"Yes."
"It looks like that you have plenty of reason to make a splash."
"Yes, I have."
"One last question. Why do you want to end your life instead of pushing back?"
"I won't hurt another human."
"But they hurt you. Badly. Again and again. You have the right to push back."
"I WON'T hurt another person."
"Why? What reason do you have to take abuse and punishment without revenge?"
"I learned to do so. My teacher told me th......."
"Your teacher told you what he had to so that your father would be satisfied. Your father wanted
a tool, and you teacher made you a tool. And he was so successful that YOU decided TO BE a tool."
"I'm not a tool. I'M NOT A TOOL!!"
"Yes, you are. And now you begin to realize this. Now you have to confirm the lies in yourself
because you realized the truth. So, will you acknowledge the reality and act so, or will you commit
suicide and be discarded like a tool that nobody needs anymore?"
"I will not die."
"Then don't do it."
"What should I do?"
"Push back."
"Even if I hurt another person?"
"They have hurt you too. Now it is time for revenge."
"How should I avenge myself? I have no power."
"You pilot the only big robot on this planet. The other pilot is injured and therefore no match.
You have all power you need. Use it."
<And now I strengthen his dark side a little bit and I have a powerful ally.>
######################################################## ################ ######################
<What's that? Why am I suddenly so sure? My world is shattered. And I want to rebuild it for me.
For my needs. I still don't want to hurt anybody, but if necessary, I will do it. Why am I
suddenly so strong?>
"I will use it. I want to live. I don't want to suffer anymore. I want to live. I don't wanna be a
tool. I want to live. I don't wanna be manipulated. I don't want to be betrayed. I don't want to be
lied to. I don't want to be forced to do thing things that I won't do. I WANT TO LIVE!"
"Then do it. You have taken a lot of abuse. You are strong. Stronger that you think. Use that
strength. Use it to reach your goals. Use it to define your goals. Do it."
"I will. I will do it."
"Good. Now I have to go. I have some business to attend."
"Will I see you again?"
"I don't know. It depends if I'm successful or not. But be sure, now that you have found your will,
you won't need me anymore."
<And if I fail, I have an ally.>
"I don't know that, but I will try. I will reach my goals. And nobody will stop me."
"Right. Whoever stands in the way, must be destroyed."
"If necessary, yes."
"Goodbye."
"Bye."
And with that, the strange man stood up and left.
<I don't know why, but I'm sure that we'll see again.>
####################################################### ################# ######################
He left the grass on the cliff and marched toward the nearest street.
<Life is good. Even when I have no success with the computers, I have access to a pilot.>
After he reached the street he made his way towards Tokyo3, the city that was built as fortress
against the angels.
END OF CHAPTER 2
---------------------------------------------------------------- -------- ---------------------------
Preread done by Ezstarius.
Domo arigato.