Ronin Warriors Fan Fiction ❯ Roses Are Red ❯ Roses Are Red 02 ( Chapter 2 )

Roses Are Red
Chapter Two
by: wingsofsakon

Shin sat on a curb as he watched the darkness of the night start to change. The moistness in the air made his body shiver from time to time. He pulled his jean jacket closed as he brought his knees to his chest.

The events of the night kept his sleepiness at bay. Even though his eyes were telling him he was tired. He felt as though his past was beginning to catch up with him. Even though he tried his best to hold it away. That same feeling of comfort started to seep back. This was something he could all to easily get used to and it frightened him.

A hand slipped onto his shoulder softly. "Shin."

Shin tilted his head up to see Ryo next to him.

"I been wondering where you went." He added as he sat down casually.

"Why is that? You know I like my time alone."

"I know that, but normally you don't stay out this late."

"I didn't think you noticed I left." Shin said starting to get up.

"I notice more than you may think… but"

"But what?" He asked as he watched his friend get back up.

"What bothered me the most was… you just up and left."

"I didn't mean to alarm you. I just needed my time."

Ryo dropped his eyes when he heard that. It was the last response he wanted after worrying about him. "Obviously you just put up a wall between us. So, I won't persist." He said putting the questions aside for later.

"Much appreciated."

"I seen you needed a ride home also. So, lets go before you get sick on us." Ryo said motioning to where he parked.

"I'd rather walk." Shin said quietly as he started to the vehicle.

"I rather you didn't." Ryo said knowing that Shin really didn't mean it to be heard.

Shin sat leaning on the door with his head resting on the window. Ryo did his best to just leave him alone and concentrate on driving. He knew there was something wrong. He thought it was strange of him to come down from his room after staying there most of the day yesterday and give Seiji a note: then leave again. This morning was another thing that bothered him. He didn't leave his room at all then left the house as if he was trying to escape them. Now finding him sitting on a curb on the other side of town. Not saying a word to him nor wanting him around. Ryo glanced over at his passenger from the corner of his eye.

"Shin… did you and Seiji get into a fight or something?" He asked concerned as they pulled into the driveway.

Shin sat there looking out the window as if he said nothing to him.

"What's going on?" He asked as he turned off the vehicle.

"No… we didn't have a fight. That's all I'm willing to say." Shin said as he got out and went inside.

Back in his room he flopped his jacket in the chair in the corner. Took a deep breath and looked in the mirror. "You're such a fool." He told himself as he stared at the reflection.

His attention turned to the door as he heard his friends out side of it.

-Did you find him? - Shuu asked.

-He's in his room right now. I found him on the other end of town. - Ryo answered back.

-What was he doing there…-

-I didn't ask. -

-Why not? - He demanded to know.

-He's not what you would call in a talking mood. - Ryo said as he heard footsteps leave.

Shin just sat on the bed. He knew Shuu would be in his room next and he was right when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in." He said as he leaned back and put his arms behind his head.

"So the captive returns." Shuu said as he made him self comfy in his room.

"I guess."

"What's up man?"

"What do you mean?"

"You been held up in your room lately… and, you snuck out of the house last night."

"I need some space… " Shin said sitting up. "Since when do I need permission to leave the house? Do I need to give my signature to?" He asked sarcastically.

Shuu stopped going through some papers on his desk to answer. "Yeah, on your way out. The clip board is hanging under the phone." He said as he acted it out. "No, you don't need permission. It was just how you left and how long you stayed out. You had us worried." He said as he opened the drawer to the dresser.

"Just how am I worrying every one. Isn't every one entitled to a few days out?"

"Yeah sure, I guess." He said as he shut the drawer. "Its just yesterday you spent all day in here."

"Ryo does the same thing. Why do I get reamed for it? When I do it."

"Well, its something we know that he does. It's highly unlikely you'd do it." He said, as he opened a black binder he'd found.

"Do you mind? I don't mind you going through my room, Shuu. Just leave that alone."

"This?… " He asked as he glanced down at it: still opening it.

"Yes… " Shin said getting up and taking it away. "This, just leave this to me."

"Fine… so… " Shuu said as he waited for his friend to get settled again on the bed. "Are you going to tell me what's up or not?" He added.

"No."

"Not even a hint?"

"No."

"… Does it have something to do with that note you gave Seiji?"

No answer…

"Ahh, so something is going on."

Shuu stood there a few seconds putting everything together.

"I swear… you're worse than a girl sometimes." Shuu snickered.

"Why is that?"

"I can't explain it, Shin." Shuu said with a smile. "Its just little things, don't worry." He added when he saw a bit of worry in his face. "It's not like you're some sissy." He teased as he left the room, but the door got caught before he shut it. In came Touma just when he was starting to feel lighter.

"I heard you were home." Touma said as he finished shutting the door.

"Sure, why not? Who's next… Seiji." Shin said as he flopped and rolled over on the bed.

"Sorry, Shin… I know when I left last night… " Touma started to say before he got cut off.

"It's fine, Touma. Just let me be for a while."

"Listen a second okay?" Touma said as he sat on the bed.

"I'm." He said snuggling in his pillow.

"I know I acted cruel and I didn't really mean it. I owe one to you and thank you for helping me."

"No you don't, but thanks for the apology and appreciation." Shin said still in the pillow.

"Yes, I do… you're welcome. Although, I have something else to talk to you about."

"What?"

"Why did you take off?"

"I already been through this with Ryo and Shuu. I just want… "

"Wanted some time alone, yeah right if you lie to me. You'll see Seiji in here next asking you the same thing."

Shin sat up quickly. "Then what do you want from me? I gave you an answer already."

"I know you did, but it's not the trut… that's not your cologne…. " Touma said, as he smelled the stirred up air. "What's going on, Shin?"

"Nothing that concerns any one but me."

"Are you… seeing some one?" Touma asked cautiously.

"Sort of." Shin said looking away.

"Either you are or you aren't." Touma said softly. "Look at me, Shin." He added as pulled his chin to face him. "I can tell you want to say something. So, don't hold back." He said kindly and for the first time noticed. That his blue eyes had a shimmering tint of green to them. "Don't stop talking to me, please."

Shin tried hard to find the words he was hiding. Until he realized again what those words could do.

"I… just met some one." He thought of saying. Hoping that he could get away with as little as possible. "It was brief, but I think I'm starting to care for them."

"What's the name?" Touma asked wanting to feel happy for him.

"Like I said it was brief, but we've crossed paths before a couple times."

"Really?… Then what does this person look like?"

"Black hair, dark eyes… a little bit taller than me."

"Oh… so is he the reason you smell of cologne?" Touma said with a slight grin.

Shin let his guard down for one second and paused in the conversation. "… yes."

"Since you smell like him. I'm guessing you got to know him better."

"He was very considerate." Shin said after a few seconds of thinking.

"Well, that's always a good sign. So, what's the scoop? Is there going to be more meetings?"

"You could say that." Shin smiled as he answered.

"It sounds like you have stolen his heart. I'm glad you found some one who cares for you." He said as he got up to leave. "Please, just… don't stay out all night or take off like that again." He said as he shut the door.

Shin grabbed his pillow as soon as the door shut. Holding it as tightly as he could. While letting the linen soak and conceal his tears. That he had been running from.

When he woke up. He could tell it was night, just by how the house sounded. Looking over at the clock. He rolled out of bed catching his fall with his hand and letting his other half follow. In this bed it made less noise than actually getting up. This was the beginning of many more nights to come, but some thing he was already used to.

Shin stood in the parking lot waiting for him to show up. The night air was starting to make him shiver. He tried his best to keep warm while he waited. He was a little early, but he rather be waiting than being late. He could feel his heart skip a beat as he saw his car pull in the lot and stop next to him.

"Come on and get in. I got the heater on." The man said he motioned to the passenger's side.

As soon as Shin opened the door. He could feel the heat hit his face and made him get in faster.

"I'm glad you were here." He said as he drove out of the lot. "I wasn't sure if you'd be here again."

"If I say I will be… I will." Shin assured as he adjusted to warm up better.

The night seemed to close in as the streetlights dimmed from the distance. The warmth of the heater soaked through the dampness of his clothes. Shin watched the scenery pass by and all that kept coming back to him was. That deep down he didn't want to go back to what he called home. There didn't seem to be anything there for him. What little magic was left in life. Was slowly drifting off into nothing and getting swallowed whole by the night. Not even noticing that the car had parked near a park just out side of town. Where he used to visit often. When he snapped from his daze. He had recognized where he was and readjusted in his seat.

Before the engine had turned off he already known his cue. Leaning over to his nightly lover and pulling him closer in an embrace. Accepting an empty passionate kiss. That grew to nothing more than a deep lustful act. He let his body shiver with anticipation as hands found their way to skin. Caressing away any thoughts or moments of the day in his mind. Letting the pleasure rush through his veins.

Surges of bliss escaped his lips and some where in the night. His lover had lost his face and turned into a shadow of what love was.

By a streetlight that over shadowed the car. Violet eyes looked away after catching a glimpse of something. That shook the center of his soul. Not being able to separate or tell if it was. Either hurt or anger… perhaps shame that he was trying to hold back. No matter what it was. Seiji looked to the road in front of him and started walking home. Not sure of what he should or shouldn't do about what he saw.

Two months later Seiji found himself sitting on the porch swing out front. Still wondering what or if any actions he should do. As it was he had now seen Shin three more times and knew of at least two other times. This time, however Shin had ventured out during the day. All Seiji knew was that he wanted to at least confront him about it. After all he never thought he would be doing such a thing.

He figured today would be the perfect day for it. Since Touma was dragged to a tournament by Shuu and Ryo was inside taking a nap. Seiji felt his nervousness hit when he saw Shin walk into the driveway.

"Seiji… I thought you'd be off with Touma and Shuu." Shin said as he got closer.

"I wanted to stay behind today. Where did you go?" Seiji asked as Shin got the porch.

"I went into town then went to the park." Shin answered as if innocent.

Which Seiji knew he wasn't because he happen to over hear a conversation on the phone by walking past his room the day before.

"You seem to be spending a lot of time there lately."

"It is my favorite place." Shin said as he started to open the screen door.

"Is that where you go at night also?"

Shin let go of the handle in shock. Then it quickly turned to anger and hurt.

"What if it was, Seiji?" Shin said flatly as he looked at him. "What is it of your business anyway?"

"We did ask you to not spend all night out."

"Some times, Seiji. I just need to get out."

"You agreed though, Shin."

"No, I didn't."

"What do we have to do to get this through your thick head, Shin. We don't like it when you start acting like this. Sure, Touma told me you been seeing some one but to sneak out at night isn't right. If that isn't bad enough…. " Seiji paused a second still not sure if he should finish.

"If it isn't bad enough sneaking out… you're also having sex in public. In the car no less at least he could do is rent you a room. Who ever this guy is he's no good for you. He doesn't even drive you home. You're letting him treat you like some cheap hooker! You've been seeing him what, two months now and you don't even talk about him. You didn't even tell any one of us you were gay. Touma only found out because he happen to… "

"That's enough!" Shin said with his hand. "First off Seiji. Who I see is my business and he's who I happen to be with. Second, I tell who ever when ever, it's my right. Third, again it's none of your business where or how I have sex. If I get off on having sex in public then that's where I'll do it, I'm not as reserved as you.

I sneak out because if I just walk out this door. All of you freak out on me when you shouldn't. I need time to do the things I like doing and seeing who I like. You want to talk about sneaking! What about you and Touma? You two still haven't told any one either so don't get on my back. Lastly, Seiji… why should you even care how I'm treated or if he's good for me? Just look at how you treat me. None of you want or notice me around unless there's cooking to be done. Or you're hurt some how.

So, stay out of my business because up until now. You have always done so… you want to act like some sort of big brother or companion. Stick to Touma he won't sneak out on you or heaven forbid… have sex in public with you." Shin said and then went in.

Shin could feel his heart racing as he went upstairs to his room. Where he tried to find refuge behind his door. Hoping to the high heavens that the blond wouldn't follow him there. Shin let his back rest against the door as he tried to slow his breathing and catch his breath. He bit his lip to help prevent the hurt and shock from over taking him. He ran his hand through his auburn hair in disbelief of what he had just told the swordsman. A few extra things had slipped out some how and he couldn't believe he let them pass his lips.

"How did he know about the car?" He asked himself quietly. In horror he realized that either some one told Seiji or… "He saw… "

Shin silenced his breathing when he thought he heard Touma and Shuu return. When he heard them downstairs with the others. He did his best to push aside all the emotions that were stirring but was startled by some one knocking on his door.

He put on his best face he could muster up and opened the door. Only to see Seiji standing there with his arms crossed.

"Yes?" Shin asked trying to hold back a glare, but knew he was failing.

"Touma and Shuu brought home some thing to eat." Seiji said not knowing what else to add.

"Okay."

"Are you coming down?" He added.

"Probably not."

Seiji stood there staring at him.

"I don't think you want to try to force me to go down there right now." Shin warned.

"Oh really?"

"Yes really, Seiji. I don't know what I might say if I do." Shin admitted that he loses it when he gets angry.

"Well… me either." Seiji threatened as he turned to leave.

"Don't you dare, Seiji." Shin catching his attention again.

"Don't what, Shin? Why not? You're the one saying what ever it is you're doing is alright… or are you ashamed of what they might think?" Seiji said taking a step closer.

"Why? Are you? Are you ashamed of me and looking to make sure so are the others." Shin replied flatly.

"So you do admit it was wrong." Seiji said as he stepped in and closed the door. "Are you ashamed, Shin? You should be."

"Why is that?"

"For seeing some one who treats you like that and for doing the things you been doing."

"I take that as your answer." Shin glared and leaned against the dresser.

"Yes, of course Shin I'm ashamed of you. I thought you wouldn't stoop this low. What is it with you anyway? If you're not upset with Touma and me… what? Do you think we don't appreciate you or something?"

"That's not it."

"Then what is it? This guy you been with isn't worth crap."

"You don't know that. You don't understand the way things are. You don't know so don't judge us."

"Don't understand?… Don't know… what? Then you tell me, Shin. How are things?"

"I wouldn't know how to put into words for you to comprehend."

"Try me." He waited for an answer. " Don't make me repeat myself."

"Some times you have to pretend in order to have what you want."

"Let me get this strait… " Seiji said in shock as things fell together. "You're telling me… that you can't get laid?"

"Bluntly put, Seiji." Shin pointed out. "But you're about as close as you're going to get."

"So that's why you objected to everything but that."

"What was that?"

"Being treated like some cheap hooker… because you are."

"I never said I was, but if that's how you want to look at it then fine."

"So then you're a free…"

"Back off Seiji. Now you're just trying to piss me off."

"Since you're free. When do I get my turn." Seiji said quickly with a glare.

Shin felt a tear fall from his eye as he bit his lip again. "I never thought… "

"Never thought what, Shin? That it would matter to the rest of us. That your actions do effect us? What?"

"Thought you… could be so cruel to me. For some one I thought was my friend and even loved. It never once crossed my mind until now. I admit that you were out of my league and I was a fool, but I never once until now. Thought I could be so hurt and hate you from my soul."

"You were right. I'm out of your league and you are a fool. You are also some one who's love is so cheap. That that's the only way you're going to get it. Cold, empty and through the darkness of some ones car. Go ahead and hate me, Shin. I don't want to know you." Seiji said as he turned to walk away, but heard a slight giggle and spun back around. "What could you find so amusing?" He asked.

"If you're trying to hurt me by what you said. Then you have to try harder."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Tell me something I don't know." Shin said as his slight smile turned to an empty glare.

Seiji could feel his anger start to boil from the inside and pushed the slighter warrior on the floor. "You still don't understand do you!"

Shin looked at him from the carpet.

"You hurt us when you see him. You hurt us when you do and think so low of your self. If you wanted me then you should have said so and I would have been. I don't get through to you when I'm nice and I don't when I'm not!"

"What's going on?" Ryo's soft voice broke through the heated room.

"He's a hooker!" Seiji said sternly as he looked at Ryo.

"Is that right, Shin? Are you going back to your old ways?" Ryo asked gently.

"What you know?" Seiji asked in disbelief.

"No, he only knew of my past." Shin answered for him.

"Oh this just keeps getting better and better."

"How else do you think I got here, Seiji? Do you think money just grows from trees? Ripe and ready for picking." Shin said as he got up.

"Shin, please answer me?" Ryo said getting his attention back.

"I haven't been going out sleeping with a bunch of people or taking money. I been seeing one guy and there's no love, okay?"

"Understood… Seiji, Touma wanted to talk to you." Ryo said.

"I'm not leaving now."

"I need to talk to Shin alone."

"But what he's doing isn't right!"

"Alone." Ryo stated sternly as he could.

Seiji took another look at Shin who'm was aloof in his standing. It only made him more frustrated and angry as he glared at him.

"Seiji… " Ryo said softly still trying to coax him out of the room with out a fight.

Shin hadn't made one move against him in defense and stood there waiting… just waiting. This was some thing the blond knew that Shin knew how to do well. He had a certain way of doing things even when it came to arguing with his friends. In which he also knew what things to do to make them angry by simply pecking at what it was. That was bothering them to begin with. Seiji looked away knowing full well that Shin had won this one as he left the room.